8th grade "graduation"

[chimilady]

ok, given the other posts, I'm reluctant to post this but I LOVED my 8th grade graduation! It marks the end of elementary school and onto HS with a bunch of people from a bunch of other schools. I got a new dress, it was the first time I ever wore a strapless dress (but it had the bolero type jacket with it).

That being said, if I don't have the funds, I don't have the funds. You can't get blood from a stone. However, if you had a Ross near you where you could get a dress for less than $20, I would try and spring for that. She will likely be going to other's graduation parties and can wear it there.

 

[ktlm]

In my town Jr. High/middle school was 7th to 9th grade, so we had 9th grade graduation instead of 8th. That was a long time ago. I'm 40ish, and I can still really remember that day. It was a huge deal for us kids. For us, it felt like the end of being a little kid. I remember everyone having new dresses. I remember our parents all took us out to eat afterwards. I'd say try places like Ross and TJ Maxx. They can have some really cute dresses at really cheap prices. I saw some very cute dresses at Ross last week that were only around $12.

Sometimes the things we parents think are silly, mean a whole lot to our children. It is an accomplishment to her. She went to school everyday and hopefully worked hard while she was there instead of just sitting there doing nothing. If she made good grades, it is even more of an accomplishment.

 

[tasha99]

DS14 had his last week. There were no caps and gowns, and the girls looked pretty dressed up. The boys wore nice clothes, but you could tell it wasn't as big a deal for them, outfitwise.

I was skeptical of an 8th grade graduation, and a bit resentful that I had to take time off work for it. I'm glad I went though. As DS predicted, I ended up crying. I spent half the time concentrating on an imaginary baseball game in my head so I wouldn't boohoo at embarrassing levels. I've got two adult kids, but now my "baby" is in high school. Oh the sentimentality of it!

 

[scrapquitler]

My daughter will be done with 8th grade this year. Of course, they're having a "graduation" ceremony and a dance. She's not interested in the dance but will be attending the "graduation" ceremony.

According to her, all the girls are getting new dresses for the ceremony (even though they will be covered with a cap/gown and there is no "afterparty" ---- once the ceremony is over, that's it)

Anyway, I'm honestly not in a position to spend $50-$75 on a dress for this. First, to me, there is no "accomplishment" involved. They went to school for 9 years because they HAD to, not because they wanted to. If there's going to be a ceremony, why not one for the parents who had to get them up everyday, make their breakfasts, get them to the bus on time, help with projects and homeworks, chaperoned class trips/parties, etc etc etc etc????

Back on topic..... On the one hand, I honestly don't have the $$ to lay out for a one-time use dress (chances are, she won't wear it again and I'll end up giving it away). On the other hand, "everyone" is getting a new dress and I don't want to be the "mean" one.

Sigh..........

If my daughter wanted a new dress for this occasion, I certainly would find a way to buy her a new dress. Even one that would only be worn once. I would explain that it needs to be done on a budget, and I'm sure that it won't be difficult at all to find a dress more in the $20-$30 price range. Try Forever 21, JCPenney, etc. I found a nice dress for my teenager to wear to a party at Windsor, and it was $39. Don't overlook the consignment stores either.

One more possibility, can she borrow from someone else? My DD doesn't like dresses and rarely wears them. On the few occasions she has needed one, many of her friends who have LOTS because they go to a lot of parties have offered to let her borrow for the evening. I just pay to have it cleaned after.

 

[Desnik]

DD will be graduating 8th grade this year too. There is a ceremony at the end of June. No caps and gowns. I will buy her an inexpensive dress to wear but we don't have anything planned for afterwards. She also has an 8th grade formal dance. This is what the kids go all out for. They all get dressed up. Girls in fancy dresses and boys in suits. I'll probably spend around $100 for a dress and the dance is $10 for a ticket. I'm excited for both!

Personally when I was growing up my school had an 8th grade graduation ceremony. It was a big deal, we wore cap and gowns and I had a big party! I had an 8th grade prom too! I got a new dress for the graduation and my prom dress I designed and had made! Like I said, it was a big deal

I do think it is a big deal and marks a milestone in my DD's life. She is growing up, going into H.S. and I know I will be at the graduation ceremony!

 

[Stacy9402]

I would check JCPenney's. I had to go buy my oldest daughter a white dress for her graduation (12th). They are required to wear a white dress under their white gown. I was having a hard time because she is very petite and dresses are not her thing. But JCP was the winner and it was under $20.

 

[HM]

They'll have gowns? For 8th grade graduation? Did you have to buy that too?

At my children's 8th grade grad ceremony, the girls wore nice dresses or skirts, the boys wore shirt and tie and nice slacks. There was somewhat of a dress code, including types of shoes.

 

[angierae]

I think it's definitely doable to get a dress for less than $50! Unless these girls are wearing ballgown type dresses under their caps and gowns? I didn't wear anything that fancy under my high school cap and gown. Nothing wrong with a sundress with a shrug to dress it up. Right now Kohl's has this dress on sale for $27 and there are plenty of others cheaper:

http://www.kohls.com/kohlsStore/jun...7/Speechless+Floral+Dot+Poplin+Tube+Dress.jsp

I think we never paid more than $75 for any of DD's 3 Homecoming dresses, I certainly wouldn't pay that much for a dress for graduation, although I would definitely buy her something. (they didn't do 8th grade graduation, although they did do elementary graduation. She had a dress in her closet she'd never worn, so she wore that.)

Now, this upcoming school year we'll have Homecoming, Prom and Graduation (and a graduation party or two) to deal with, so I am gearing up for the clothing budget hit THAT is going to mean.

 

[tzolkin]

DD is finishing 8th grade, but in our district K-6 is Elem and 7-12 is at the HS, so she's already technically been at the HS for two years.

They did do an awards ceremony (during the school day) at the end of 6th grade. All of the kids just wore whatever they had on for school that day.

That said, I would get her a dress if she wanted one. I'm big on shopping the clearance aisles and she knows we're not going for something expensive.

I would also assume that she would have some occasion to wear the dress again. Perhaps for a school dance next year? A few years ago DD picked out a black and white dress for a wedding because she knew she could also wear it for her chorus concerts.


Our school also does not do a kindergarten "graduation". They do a "recognition" day. The kids dress up, sing songs on stage, and then there is punch and cookies in the classrooms where the parents/grandparents/whoever can go with the child to see their projects posted around the room. I'm sure it's similar to what many other schools do, but they make it explicit that it's not a "graduation" and there are no caps/diplomas/etc.

 

[erinmomof2]

Why not check out a local resale or consignment shop? I find my girls dresses there all the time. Most are like new (and a lot of times I find them with tags still on the dress) for really cheap. The consignment shop I like has a $1 sale where everything with a certain color tag is $1. I always find good stuff. And at least where I live the bigger kid sizes are always the easiest to find. The children's consignment shops in my area carry up to women's size 3/4. If my daughter wanted a new dress I'd probably make it happen, but I don't think it's necessary to spend a lot of money on it.

 

[NVDisMom]

As a mom of two girls...I'd spring for a new dress. DD14 had her awards ceremony for 8th grade last year and got a cute dress from Kohl's with a lacey jacket to keep it within dress code for under $30. I used a $10 incentive card that I had gotten in the mail and we shopped clearance. I wish I had known about Platos' Closet last year and I would have gotten off spending even less. She has worn that little jacket with jeans and tanks all year long as a freshman in high school and still gets compliments. The dress has been worn for a couple of other special occasions too.
DD12 will have her 8th grade awards next year and we will probably do something similar.

Honestly, every girl did have a new dress with very few exceptions and most felt sorry for those girls. I would move heaven and earth to figure out a way to help ease the pain of peer pressure in this age group when I am the one who holds the reins. I can't fix the curly hair or the awkward moments, but I can do a dress. Goodness knows I have a couple of dresses that I have only worn once or twice.

Even if we don't see it, the transition to high school is a little scary and these ceremonies help to make them feel more grown up, more prepared for what is ahead of them...a right of passage if you will.

Congrats to you and your daughter, no matter what your choice in regards to attire may be. She's growing up and moving on!

 

[NotUrsula]

If it makes you feel any better, I had to buy a suit for DS last year for his. He wore it twice and now the sleeves are too short: that was $230 that I'll never see again.

8th grade graduations are a big deal here, but they don't wear caps and gowns, so yes, they all do get new outfits for the occasion.

 

[luvsJack]

Just had dd's 8th grade graduation Friday night. They did not wear a cap and gown and I would say 90% of the kids had new clothes.

DD did not have a dress, because she doesn't wear dresses very often (unless it is absolutely required) so she got a pair of black dress pants and a pretty top for less than $40 at Penney's. They did have the option though to wear pants.





I would like to say though, that while it may seem ridiculous and meaningless to some of you---for the kids in dd's class, it was VERY meaningful and not ridiculous at all.

Leaving jr. high and entering high school is a milestone whether you consider it an "achievement" or not and it is important to them. Like someone said, entering high school can be a scary thing to these kids and this sort of bridges the way for them.

I have never understood undermining something that is important to our kids and meaningful to them because "they are expected to do it anyway".

 

[hereyago]

dd13 will be having some sort of 8th grade graduation ceremony on the last day of school. She will wear a dress that she has, but never wears because she doesn't like to wear dresses at school.

She also had a graduation ceremony-once again no cap and gown-for graduating 5th grade.


Have no clue of what we are doing after wards, my mind is a blank.

 

[bumbershoot]

I agree with this, both the sundress suggestion and the sentiment about 8th grade graduations. It is a milestone, plus it breaks up their schooling and makes them feel like they're going somewhere. Middle school is a difficult transition period and I feel like they deserve to celebrate their success in making it through.

Yeppers. Junior/Middle school was horrid, and I was glad to be out of it. (we switched from junior to middle school in between 7th and 8th grades...we went from being the babies of the school to the oldest in one decision by the school board!)

And if I'm doing the backwards school math right, I had my 8th grade ceremony in 1983, so it's definitely nothing new, and everyone was indeed expecting to move on to high school.


If you truly cannot afford a new dress, then it is what it is. Otherwise, I'd at least *try* to find a cute, budget, dress. I had a new, white eyelet, spaghetti strap dress with a sash that I wore for mine, with white and pink earrings and low pink pumps. I had a little bolero-style jacket, too. I'm 42 and still remember this. Guess it was important to me!

My mom couldn't afford multiple dresses for various dances I went to later...I wore the same dress for my junior prom, a friends senior prom, and my senior prom (it was tea length with an underskirt to make it full length, and so I changed that up, and made various sashes in different colors, with different jewelery to make it different...oh and I had different dates for each which made it all new, LOL). But she did buy me that 8th grade dress!

 

[Mirax]

I always assumed the "8th" grade graduation was more for the students because they will be going seperate ways. Especially private schools where the students tend to go to many different highschools. In my community the Jr. High 8th graders will be spilt into two different high schools. Three Jr. Highs and two High Schools.

I think buying a new dress, for the season, would be nice to have, but if it's not in the budget, than it should be a no go.

 

[MrsDoubtfire]

My DD13 attends a charter middle school - and will be participating in an 8th grade graduation ceremony where parents and other family members are welcome to attend. They will be wearing caps and gowns in their school colors, and I believe get to keep the caps. I do not believe that this ceremony is ridiculous at all, and I know her and many of her friends (both female and male) and excited about it. While it's true that more kids today "have" to go to school until 12th grade or so - this 8th grad celebration is more like a rite of passage to me. This year in middle school (ousr is 5th thru 8th grade), the 8th-graders rein supreme, while next year as many will part ways and attend different high schools - they will at the bottom rungs of the ladder once again - as freshman. They also will receive a "yearbook" with school pics as well as candid shots in it. I think that is cool since my DD has gone to school with many of the same children since kindergarten - many who became friends, others at least acquaintances . Nice memories, IMO.

With that being said - if my DD desires a new dress for the occasion, I'll spring for one - but not too pricy of one. We'll shop at Delia's, Forever 21, Kohl's, perhaps Deb. I'm thinking a sundress or something cute that she can wear in the summer as well. Her school also hosts an 8th grade semi-formal dinner dance, which I already plunked down some serous cash for a dress at Bebe, with 40% off so not too bad. I'm hoping she'll be able to make use out it at least one more time since my size 2 days are LONG GONE, HA HA

 

[RitaE]

8th grade graduation is definitely a new dress occasion here.

Of course it isn't as important as High School or College graduation, but I wouldn't call it a non-event either. I'm one who kind of scoffs at the Kindergarten and all the other grade "graduations" but a ceremony for the 8th graders seems pretty reasonable as they move into High School.

 

[imsayin]

Just had dd's 8th grade graduation Friday night. They did not wear a cap and gown and I would say 90% of the kids had new clothes.

and

Honestly, every girl did have a new dress with very few exceptions

How do you know who had new clothes or not? Maybe it's because my kids go to a gigantic school, but I would have no clue.

To the OP, I would have DD wear a dress she already owns if I couldn't afford it. If I could afford it, I would offer her money to buy some summer clothes she would wear more than once instead of getting a dress.

A dress to wear for a few hours underneath a gown is not worth it.

 

[MrsPete]

My daughter will be done with 8th grade this year. Of course, they're having a "graduation" ceremony and a dance. She's not interested in the dance but will be attending the "graduation" ceremony.

According to her, all the girls are getting new dresses for the ceremony (even though they will be covered with a cap/gown and there is no "afterparty" ---- once the ceremony is over, that's it)

Anyway, I'm honestly not in a position to spend $50-$75 on a dress for this. First, to me, there is no "accomplishment" involved. They went to school for 9 years because they HAD to, not because they wanted to. If there's going to be a ceremony, why not one for the parents who had to get them up everyday, make their breakfasts, get them to the bus on time, help with projects and homeworks, chaperoned class trips/parties, etc etc etc etc????

Back on topic..... On the one hand, I honestly don't have the $$ to lay out for a one-time use dress (chances are, she won't wear it again and I'll end up giving it away). On the other hand, "everyone" is getting a new dress and I don't want to be the "mean" one.

Sigh..........

I'd be inclined to get her a new dress, BUT I'd choose one that 1) doesn't require a $50 outlay and 2) will be appropriate for more than a one-time wear.

Although I can't see making 8th grade graduation a big deal, I don't understand your attitude towards her "accomplishment". Yes, finishing 8th grade was something that you expected her to do, but it's still a milestone in her life. You sound quite bitter, and I can't see why.