As a behavior interventionist, I have to say - natural consequences are the best consequences. Missing the trip is a result of HER choices - not yours.
Your original plans included her.
Look at it this way - would you postpone Christmas morning for your younger kids if she made the choice not to come home the night before? Or was arrested due to drugs? Extreme example, I know, just trying to put it in perspective.....
Plus, rearranging your lives/plans teaches her that the world revolves around her and no matter her choices, mom will swoop in and make it all better. Not a good lesson for her to learn...
Just my two cents... I'm sure many will disagree...
Excellent advice!
My concern would be that she has adequate supervision and will not be having a party or such in my home while I am away.
She has issues that she needs to handle. At my school, students are suspended for multiple days for drug possession, so she is lucky she isn't with us. She would also have mandatory drug counselling as well.
Best of luck. I hang with teens all day long, and I can tell you that most of them are a uniques species all to themselves.
Have a wonderful trip! Tiger