Never Shopping Again - Update in Post #1

[Tinker'n'Fun]

**Update** I spoke with the District Manager today and he stated that the store policy is to ask disruptive customer's to leave. If they do not associates are to immediately contact the police. I requested that an incident report be filed and a copy be sent to me. I also requested an apology letter from the Manager who gave me the wrong information. District manager stated that disciplinary actions would be taken.. (Not sure if I believe him as I was a supervisor in CS for many years and this was a standard line for angry customers...) I'll let you know if they follow up. I will feel better knowing if he is to come back and try something that his conduct will be recorded.

This may be a bit OT but I have to do something before I explode.....

Tonight I took my DS12 shopping for sneakers. This is an unusual scene since he never wants to be with me anymore and shopping isn't a boy thing. We went to a "famous" budget priced shoe store in a local strip mall. There were only us, two other shoppers, and two "intelligent" looking employees. They were even friendly and said helllo as we walked through the door....

I have to stop here and say I have never been so upset and shaky in my life, never!! Tonight has changed my views of the world big time..

Back to shopping. DS picked out two pairs of sneakers and I even found one for me and one for DD. We head to the checkout. Now the only employee in view is the young lady ringing us out. WE are approximately 15ft from the front door when all of a sudden this "disturbed" gentleman opens one side of the store doors and blocks off the other door so no one can leave. He starts shouting obscentities and threatening the workers and shoppers. I look to the the cashier (SHE has a headphone on her head) and I assume she is calling the police... Nothing just babble about my sale. I ask her to call the police or have the manager call. She said no! Well I fumble through my cards and make the sale as long as I can so I don't have to go near the door. About 5 minutes later the man leaves. Still no response or help from the employee other that "he has been here before". Now I am shaking and DS who towers over me in height, but still is only 12 is very upset. I can see it in his eyes. So I drive home immediately and fall on the couch crying and telling DH. I calm down enough to call the store and ask the manager for a corporate number because I feel they allowed us to be in danger. The manager said "I couldn't call the police that would break protocol as we take a passive approach to these situations at our store" . I think this is where I lost my mind and almost pee'd my pants. I told him that I didn't want the employee to upset this man but hey they have a back room and the police are always in the parking area of the stores....

So what would you do and what do you think I should say to the District Manager when he calls me back...

PS.. I want to bring the shoes back but DS absolutely Loves his new sneaks.. so please don't recommend that...

Thanks for listening and reading this long post!

 

[LanaJae]

This may be a bit OT but I have to do something before I explode.....

Tonight I took my DS12 shopping for sneakers. This is an unusual scene since he never wants to be with me anymore and shopping isn't a boy thing. We went to a "famous" budget priced shoe store in a local strip mall. There were only us, two other shoppers, and two "intelligent" looking employees. They were even friendly and said helllo as we walked through the door....

I have to stop here and say I have never been so upset and shaky in my life, never!! Tonight has changed my views of the world big time..

Back to shopping. DS picked out two pairs of sneakers and I even found one for me and one for DD. We head to the checkout. Now the only employee in view is the young lady ringing us out. WE are approximately 15ft from the front door when all of a sudden this "disturbed" gentleman opens one side of the store doors and blocks off the other door so no one can leave. He starts shouting obscentities and threatening the workers and shoppers. I look to the the cashier (SHE has a headphone on her head) and I assume she is calling the police... Nothing just babble about my sale. I ask her to call the police or have the manager call. She said no! Well I fumble through my cards and make the sale as long as I can so I don't have to go near the door. About 5 minutes later the man leaves. Still no response or help from the employee other that "he has been here before". Now I am shaking and DS who towers over me in height, but still is only 12 is very upset. I can see it in his eyes. So I drive home immediately and fall on the couch crying and telling DH. I calm down enough to call the store and ask the manager for a corporate number because I feel they allowed us to be in danger. The manager said "I couldn't call the police that would break protocol as we take a passive approach to these situations at our store" . I think this is where I lost my mind and almost pee'd my pants. I told him that I didn't want the employee to upset this man but hey they have a back room and the police are always in the parking area of the stores....

So what would you do and what do you think I should say to the District Manager when he calls me back...

PS.. I want to bring the shoes back but DS absolutely Loves his new sneaks.. so please don't recommend that...

Thanks for listening and reading this long post!

I would tell the District Manager exactly what you told us.

It won't make you feel any better, but I've been in stores where this has happened before and I worked at a huge facility for mentally ill people for years. It sounds as if this happens fairly often in that store, maybe this man hangs around that area. The police are probably familiar with him too and regard him as harmless in the violent sense. Of course he should not be swearing in a public area, or blocking the doorway and that needs to be addressed with him immediately. He sounds like he has schizophrenia and is not taking medication at the moment.

It doesn't make it right though and I sure understand how scary and upsetting this would be if you've never experienced it before.

 

[bdcp]

Um, so explode to those involved. As far as I can tell, he didnt' break any laws and if the employees know him and this is not unsuual, there is nothing you can do other than complain to management. I can understand you being upset at the time, but the employee saying he's done that before tells me they dont' see him as a real problem. I don't see the point in returning the shoes or in you crying when you got home since it was over and nothing really happened. I'm not the crying type, but I might call the manager and tell him I was somewhat concerned and that you will never return to his store again. The most they can really do is tell him to move on. Okay, so what do you mean by "threatening the workers"? What exactly did he say? That's too general of a statement. What the heck do you mean by "intelligent looking employees"? If one incident in one store at night changed your "view of the world" where have you been? The news is worse every day. What did you want the employees to do? Throw him out? Call the cops who would have done nothing more than tell him to move on? You werent' too upset to come on here, on the internet and post. I dont get that. I have friends and family and the last thing I'd do is come on an online board and "vent". That's what I have friends and family for. What did you DH say? My guess is he wasn't as concerned as you.

 

[dvc at last !]

This may be a bit OT but I have to do something before I explode.....

Tonight I took my DS12 shopping for sneakers. This is an unusual scene since he never wants to be with me anymore and shopping isn't a boy thing. We went to a "famous" budget priced shoe store in a local strip mall. There were only us, two other shoppers, and two "intelligent" looking employees. They were even friendly and said helllo as we walked through the door....

I have to stop here and say I have never been so upset and shaky in my life, never!! Tonight has changed my views of the world big time..

Back to shopping. DS picked out two pairs of sneakers and I even found one for me and one for DD. We head to the checkout. Now the only employee in view is the young lady ringing us out. WE are approximately 15ft from the front door when all of a sudden this "disturbed" gentleman opens one side of the store doors and blocks off the other door so no one can leave. He starts shouting obscentities and threatening the workers and shoppers. I look to the the cashier (SHE has a headphone on her head) and I assume she is calling the police... Nothing just babble about my sale. I ask her to call the police or have the manager call. She said no! Well I fumble through my cards and make the sale as long as I can so I don't have to go near the door. About 5 minutes later the man leaves. Still no response or help from the employee other that "he has been here before". Now I am shaking and DS who towers over me in height, but still is only 12 is very upset. I can see it in his eyes. So I drive home immediately and fall on the couch crying and telling DH. I calm down enough to call the store and ask the manager for a corporate number because I feel they allowed us to be in danger. The manager said "I couldn't call the police that would break protocol as we take a passive approach to these situations at our store" . I think this is where I lost my mind and almost pee'd my pants. I told him that I didn't want the employee to upset this man but hey they have a back room and the police are always in the parking area of the stores....

So what would you do and what do you think I should say to the District Manager when he calls me back...

PS.. I want to bring the shoes back but DS absolutely Loves his new sneaks.. so please don't recommend that...

Thanks for listening and reading this long post!

Yikes !
Where did this happen ?
I just got home from the Walden Galleria !

 

[Tinker'n'Fun]

Yikes !
Where did this happen ?
I just got home from the Walden Galleria !

Sam's Plaza across the street...

 

[northcapemaymom]

Um, so explode to those involved. As far as I can tell, he didnt' break any laws and if the employees know him and this is not unsuual, there is nothing you can do other than complain to management. I can understand you being upset at the time, but the employee saying he's done that before tells me they dont' see him as a real problem. I don't see the point in returning the shoes or in you crying when you got home since it was over and nothing really happened. I'm not the crying type, but I might call the manager and tell him I was somewhat concerned and that you will never return to his store again. The most they can really do is tell him to move on. Okay, so what do you mean by "threatening the workers"? What exactly did he say? That's too general of a statement. What the heck do you mean by "intelligent looking employees"? If one incident in one store at night changed your "view of the world" where have you been? The news is worse every day. What did you want the employees to do? Throw him out? Call the cops who would have done nothing more than tell him to move on? You werent' too upset to come on here, on the internet and post. I dont get that. I have friends and family and the last thing I'd do is come on an online board and "vent". That's what I have friends and family for. What did you DH say? My guess is he wasn't as concerned as you.

Ouch. Bdcp, were you at the store?....could you have been the person standing in the doorway? Hmmm....

 

[Tinker'n'Fun]

Ouch. Bdcp, were you at the store?....could you have been the person standing in the doorway? Hmmm....

My thoughts also... but thought maybe I was being too sensitive tonight due to the circumstances of my evening.

 

[HannaBelle]

"disturbed" gentleman opens one side of the store doors and blocks off the other door so no one can leave. He starts shouting obscentities and threatening the workers and shoppers.

That sounds pretty dangerous to me and in lieu of everthing that is happening in the world today it is not at all unreasonable to expect the police to take action in this situation.

I am so sorry this happened to you and I would not let it keep you from shopping. That stores policy is too lax. I am anxious to hear what upper management has to say about the behavior.

 

[Tinker'n'Fun]

I guess I was over dramatic about the shopping thing, but I was definetely scared. I just won't go alone at night anymore... And we do have to eat so boycotting grocery shopping probably won't fly around here.. Even though I would like to try.

 

[northcapemaymom]

Tinker'n'fun, I would have been upset too if I were in your position - especially since your son was there. How were you supposed to know this nutter-butter was "harmless"? Who says the next time he makes an appearance at that store he could totally go off and hurt someone? If the store cannot take action to keep their customers safe by calling the police, they have no right to stay in business. Who would want to shop there in the future if they allow this person to harass their customers? Definitely talk to the management - and don't hold back either.

 

[northcapemaymom]

Double ouch.

 

[HunnyPots]

OK, so he's done this before, they say. Well, there had to have been a first time when they didn't know whether or not he was harmless and still they chose to do nothing. The point is, he made threats and the store did nothing to protect their customers or employees. That is what you tell the district manager. And you also tell him/her that you will be notifying the local police and/or mall security yourself to alert them to the problem. And then you do it.
And if it were me, I would tell everyone I knew about the incident so they can decide for themselves if they feel safe shopping there. I would not be going back.

 

[Tinker'n'Fun]

DH was very concerned and actually placed the call to the corporate store. He spoke with a young lady who then spoke with me. And just to set the record straight, I didn't come to the "budget board" for validation! I came here because I feel more comfortable with my "budget board friends", value "their" opinions and am a frequent poster here...

 

[npmommie]

Honestly I don't think you are being fair to the OP. SHE felt scared in that situation..........SHE does not work in that store, she never experienced this before, she may have never experienced a mentally ill person.........Her feelings should not be discredited just because you do not share them. We all respond differently to these situations.
and she felt threatened, she had her child with her,
OP I am sorry that happened to you, I hope you both feel better

 

[Tinker'n'Fun]

Honestly I don't think you are being fair to the OP. SHE felt scared in that situation..........SHE does not work in that store, she never experienced this before, she may have never experienced a mentally ill person.........Her feelings should not be discredited just because you do not share them. We all respond differently to these situations.
and she felt threatened, she had her child with her,
OP I am sorry that happened to you, I hope you both feel better

Thank You, I am calming down a bit now. I have had some experience with mentally ill persons, and have even been in the store when the police are in for shoplifting/disturbances. But tonight I felt trapped. Maybe he was harmless, but how was I to know? The young lady behind the counter just kept her head down...

 

[LanaJae]

Thank You, I am calming down a bit now. I have had some experience with mentally ill persons, and have even been in the store when the police are in for shoplifting/disturbances. But tonight I felt trapped. Maybe he was harmless, but how was I to know? The young lady behind the counter just kept her head down...

The store was in the wrong, period, even if they know the man and even if he's been doing this for weeks/months/years. If they were experienced with him, someone should have had the sense to go over to him and walk him outside and tell him that he could not shout or block a doorway. If they were at all intimidated, the police should have been called. YOU were the customer tonight, not him. The store needed to do what it could to make you comfortable in a situation that they are aware of.

You did nothing wrong by posting this here, there are kind people to respond, and after all, you were shopping for a bargain!

 

[DOOM1001]

This reminds me a bit of my first job at a Champs sports and over by the shoes a guy just fell to the floor and started spinning and shouting bad words and acting nutty,everyone,employees and other shoppers came over to see what was happening,he stayed doing this for over a minute.Well we had a young manager who realized this might be a ploy to distract attention and he was focusing on the entrance of the store and sure enough about 30 seconds into his act another guy who was hanging out by the clothes tried to sneak out with hundred dollar jackets and a few other things the manager saw him and grabbed him,the other guy ran off but I heard security caught him.

 

[FSUDisneyGirl]

I'm sure that was scary...I would be freaked out, too! I think that the store has a responsibility to keep a safe environment for everyone...hope you get it all figured out!

 

[kaytieeldr]

OK, so he's done this before, they say. Well, there had to have been a first time when they didn't know whether or not he was harmless and still they chose to do nothing.

Um, no - we have NO way of knowing what action was taken the first (or first few, or first dozen, or whatever) time this he did this. Probably the store DID call the police - and it's since been determined that such action is pointless/unnecessary.

If the OP isn't happy with the response from the store, why not contact the mall owners, or the police on her own?

 

[mpls_mm]

I think as a society we are far too passive or worried about appearing nice. I don't know if it's a woman thing or what. I was in law enforcement and even after left I have tended bar in some seedy places and been in the middle of many ugly situations. I have seen plenty of "harmless" mentally ill people go off the deep end. That man obviously needed medication or intervention. Everybody turning a blind eye does him no good, the police can do something if someone is a threat to himself or others. If that man walked into traffic or killed someone, everyone who did nothing has a responsibility in it. I personally value my safety and do not wish to be a target. I don't assume somebody else will look out for me or what the past actions have been or what might happen. If there is a fight in a restaurant or bar, I am the first one to get behind the bar or head for the kitchen or call the police. In that situation, I would have told her to call the cops and would have waited at a very safe distance until they got there, not asked, but demanded, then the police would have walked me out to my car. I certainly would not stand near a man making terroristic threats and I certainly would not walk out alone where he could be waiting. I have talked to dozens of women who have been hurt or raped and many say " I had this feeling " or " I should have... "
We should listen to our gut feelings and not worry about being dramatic. Why on earth would anyone compromise their safety or childrens safety to wait and see? I would much rather be saying, "I sure looked silly diving for cover and calling the cops than saying I don't have my child anymore because I didn't do anything.
As for the poster that wanted to see what the husband thought to assess the situation, I don't need my husband or any man to validate my reaction before I can see if it is warranted and asking that question is insulting to women everywhere. That you are a woman makes it even worse. This is not 1950, we get to vote and everything now.