You Know You're From "....." When...

[poohbear1029]

Okay...have to add one to the Massachusetts one:

You can spot a tourist, cause they're the only ones who call it Beantown with a straight face!

 

[mum4jenn]

<table width="400" align="center" border="1" bordercolor="black" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2"> <tr><td bgcolor="#CCFFFF" align="center"> <font face="Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif" style="color:black; font-size: 14pt;"> You Know You're From Albany / Leesburg, GA When...</font></td></tr> <tr><td align="left" bgcolor="#FFFFFF"> <font face="Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif" style="color:black; font-size: 10pt;"> Everyone you know is either Baptist or Methodist. Iced tea is a staple of every meal. You actively look out for deer whenever you drive at dusk. You have or you knwo someone who has accidentally hit a deer. You know that guy who sits in the recliner in the back of his pickup on Slappey Boulevard. Panama City Beach is the big deal. Rebel flags are the predominant car decoration. You understand that at least once a year your car will turn yellow with pollen. It's a massive snowstorm when an inch falls. You knew all the cops in town, because they are somehow related to you or you know their family. You know at least one Bubba, and maybe a few guys named Bo. All the real concerts are in Atlanta. Wal- mart is the cool place to go in the middle of the night. You say "tuna fish sandwich." Anyone who orders a "pop" must be a dork. It's a Coke, silly! You know all the latest country music songs, naturally. Even if you hate country music. You remember and miss the big tree across from the STOCKS market by Phelema road. You took class field trips to Chehaw park and tried to pet the wild peacocks. "Ya'll" and "ain't" are key vocabulary words. Doesn't everyone own a Laborador Retriever or two??? You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Albany and Leesburg.</font></td></tr></table>
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[florida-again]

OMG, I didnt realise what a true Londoner I was!!! This is so true for me!

You Know You're From London When...
You say "the city" and expect everyone to know which one.

You have never been to The Tower or Madame Tussauds but love Brighton.

You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Shepherds Bush to Elephant & Castle at 3:30 on the Friday before a long weekend, but can't find Dorset on a map.

Hookers and the homeless are invisible.

You step over people who collapse on the tube.

You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual.

You've considered stabbing someone.

Your door has more than three locks.

Your favourite movie has Hugh Grant in it.

You consider eye contact an act of overt aggression.

You call an 8' x 10' plot of patchy grass a garden.

You know where Karl Marx is buried.

You consider Essex the "countryside"

You think Hyde Park is "nature."

You're paying ?1,200 a month for a studio the size of a walk-in wardrobe and you think it's a "bargain."

Shopping in suburban supermarkets and shopping malls gives you a severe attack of agoraphobia.

You've been to Tooting twice and got hopelessly lost both times.

You pay more each month to park your car than most people in the UK pay in rent.

You haven't seen more than twelve stars in the night sky since you went camping as a kid.

You own hiking boots and a 4WD vehicle, neither of which have ever touched dirt.

You haven't heard the sound of true absolute silence since 1977, and when you did, it terrified you.

You pay ?3 without blinking for a beer that cost the bar 28p.

You actually take fashion seriously.

Being truly alone makes you nervous.

You have 27 different menus next to your telephone.

The UK west of Heathrow is still theoretical to you.

You're suspicious of strangers who are actually nice to you.

You haven't cooked a meal since helping mum last Christmas with the turkey.

Your idea of personal space is no one actually standing on your toes.

?50 worth of groceries fit in one paper bag.

You have a minimum of five "worst cab ride ever" stories.

You don't hear sirens anymore.

You've mentally blocked out all thoughts of the city's air quality and what it's doing to your lungs.

You live in a building with a larger population than most towns.

Your cleaner is Russian, your grocer is Korean, your deli man is Israeli, your landlord is Italian, your laundry guy is Chinese, your favourite bartender is Irish, your favourite diner owner is Greek, the watch-seller on your corner is Senegalese, your last cabbie was Pakistani, your newsagent is Indian and your favourite falafel guy is Egyptian.

You wouldn't want to live anywhere else until you get married.

You say 'mate' constantly

Anyone not from London is a 'w***er'

Anyone from outside London and north of the Watford Gap is a 'Northern W***er'

You have no idea where the North is.

You see All Saints in the Met Bar (again) and find it hard to get excited about it.

The countryside makes you nervous

Somebody speaks to you on the tube and you freak out thinking they are a stalker.

You talk in postcodes. "God, it was really warm round SW1 the other day"

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from London.

 

[florida-again]

Some of these are so true too! I just inserted the true ones...

You Know You're Jewish When...


You grew up thinking it was normal for someone to shout "Are you okay? Are you okay?" through the bathroom door when you were in there longer than 3 minutes. MY MOTHER DOES THIS TO ME! NOW I KNOW WHY!!! I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT WHEN I READ IT!


Every Saturday morning your father went to the neighborhood deli (called an "appetizing store") for whitefish salad, whitefish ("chubs"), lox (nova if you were rich!), herring, corned beef, roast beef, cole slaw, potato salad, a 1/2-dozen huge barrel pickles, a dozen assorted bagels, cream cheese and rye bread (sliced while he waited) .. all of which would be strictly off-limits until Sunday morning.

Every Sunday afternoon was spent visiting your grandparents and/or other relatives.

You experienced the phenomenon of 50 people fitting into a 10-foot-wide dining room hitting each other with plastic plates trying to get to a deli tray.



You never knew anyone whose last name didn't end in one of 5 standard suffixes (berg, baum, man, stein and witz.)


You can look at gefilte fish and not turn green.

Your mother smacked you really hard and continues to make you feel bad for hurting her hand.

You can understand Yiddish but you can't speak it.

You know how to pronounce numerous Yiddish words and use them correctly in context, yet you don't exactly know what they mean. Kinahurra.



You thought speaking loud was normal.

You considered your Bar or Bat Mitzvah a "Get Out of Hebrew School Free" card.

You think eating half a jar of dill pickles is a wholesome snack.



Your mother took personal pride when a Jew was noted for some accomplishment (showbiz, medicine, politics, etc.) and was ashamed and embarrassed when a Jew was accused of a crime .. as if they were relatives.


And finally, you knew that Sunday night and the night after any Jewish holiday was designated for Chinese food. I LAUGHED MY HEAD OFF AT THIS ONE TOO, IT'S ABSOLUTELY TRUE!!!

 

[Chipperdini]

You find yourself singing "Garfield 1-2323" in the shower.

Arrrrrgh! Nooooo!

Garfield 1-2323
Garfield 1-2323

 

[laurie31]

These are all hilarious!

Here are mine:

You Know You're From Alabama When...
You have a party or a barbeque whenever Alabama plays Auburn in football.

My gosh, it's the biggest party of the year!

You go to Gulf Shores every summer.

well, we did until the place we stay was "Ivanized" and three weeks after they finially finished the repairs and reopened it, along came Katrina. We're hoping to go back in '07...

You call the Atlanta Braves baseball team "us" like they're actually from Alabama. we have no major sports team of our own, so we'll take what we can get

You would much rather visit Florida than California. Well, duh - that's where WDW is

You don't "take", you "carry" or "tote"... as in "You want me to carry you down to the 7-11?" I've never said "tote" but yes, "carry" is what we say. Example: I carry my kids to school in the morning and the bus carries them home.

A soft drink isn't soda, cola, or pop, it's Coke.

You call it a "buggy" and not a shopping cart.

You've said "fixin' to," "might could," or "usetacould" during the last week.

Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.

That one took me off guard. I didn't realize that was odd - I thought EVERYONE who got married in fall did that. How could you not? Yes, I did and so did everyone I know who got married in the fall.

You know the meaning of the phrase "Fobbed again." Unfortunately yes.

You can properly pronounce Eufaula, Opelika, Bayou La Batre, and Oneonta.

The Talladega 500 is the biggest sporting event of any sort during the entire year.

And by gosh, don't speed on the interstates on race day! Actually, try to avoid the interstates on race day if at all possible. I hate working race weekend because I have to drive in that mess.

You know exactly what chitlins and mountain oysters are, and you know someone who eats them anyway.

Yeah, I know what they are but I do NOT know anyone who eats them!

You think that people who complain about the humidity in other states are sissies. Yep, when the humidity gets down below 70% we think it's heaven! When the temp and the humidity are both in the high 90s, we just stay indoors.

You aren't surprised to find rental movies, groceries, ammunition and bait all in the same store. I refuse to eat in a restaurant that also sells bait or jail bonds.

You've missed a wedding or a funeral to go to a football game. Well, *I* haven't but I know people who have.

Asian food is always "CHINESE" regardless of the fact that it may actually be Korean or Japanese or Thai

I love Thai food and don't confuse it with the others. I think it's like "coke" though. Chinese is the generic name for all Asian food.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Alabama.

Laurie

 

[Alice's Mom]

That is hilarious!

I came to California when I was 8 from Hawaii, so a few of yours fit me too, my parents fit a lot of yours, they can speak pidgen brah!

 

[Jen_in_NH]

You say "wicked" instead of "really."

Your idea of a good meal is Katie's Country Kitchen

You drive a Suburu

Half of your clothes are from L.L. Bean

You rather vacation in New Zealand than Florida

Motorcycle Weekend is the highlight of your summer

When you take your yearly trip into Boston, you "pak ya cah in Havad Yad"

"Vacation" means going to Burlington for the weekend.

You go out of state and don't understand what "tax" means on your receipt

You think of the major food groups as venison, beer, fish, and berries.

You refer to the Patriots as "we".

You can identify a Massachusetts accent.

You can visit Berlin, New London, Bethlehem, Lisbon, Lebanon and Dublin all in one afternoon.

Down South to you means Boston.

You consider Manchester exotic. Or just wierd.....

You don't have a coughing fit from one sip of Ballantine Ale.

You can actually pronounce Kancamagus.

You know what a bubbler is.

Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new machine shed.

You go out for fish fry every Friday.

You can recognize someone from Massachusetts from their driving.

Jen

 

[MissMinnie]

Pfishgirl, you made my day!! Thanks for the laugh. Now I am homesick for the Jersey Shore...........

 

[BandGeek911]

You don't "go to the beach", you go "down the shore".

In your mind you hear "watch out for the tram car please" even in your sleep.

You've had arguments over cheesesteak quality.

When it snows more than an inch, you call it a blizzard.

You know someone named Siprasiut Xayapachan.

You've actually found the Echelon Mall.

Your uncle is in the mafia.

You or your friends have Lyme Disease.

You don't understand why there aren't more 24-hour diners elsewhere in the country.

You know what a Wawa is, and know the location of at least 15 of them

You know what became of the 13th Leeds child, and claim to have seen him one time while peeing in the woods.

One time you were driving in the woods and got stuck in sand.

You have an EZ Pass, but you just hold it up.

Even though there's a new Wal-Mart in your town, you still go to the Berlin Farmers Market for cheap stuff.

Your neighborhood demonstrates co-existence of African-Americans and racist rednecks.

You know that you should get the hell out of Camden before dark.

Your car is covered with yellow-green dust in April ann May.

You buy Shop-Rite brand food at Shop-Rite.

Honesty, sincerity, and courtesy are things you once saw happen in Ohio.

You know how to successfully handle a traffic circle.

You think the Olive Garden is a bunch of crap and should not open restaurants in South Jersey.

You worked at a blueberry farm when you were 13.

You played soccer from Kindergarten through high school.

You've counted the number of titty bars on the Black Horse Pike.

You always went to the Franklin Institute when you were a kid.

Your middle school hangout was the mall.

You have an unusable, piece-of-**** boat in your front yard.

You once skipped school and went to Wildwood.

You're Italian.

You know where to get the best bagel.

You've called someone an "*******" to their face at the Philly airport.

You say "water" weird. (I know some people though!)

Even your school made good Italian subs, but you call them hoagies.

You've almost fallen asleep on the Expressway.

You've lived through hurricanes, nor'easters and fires, but have never seen a tornado, earthquake or volcano.

You can't believe MTV went to Seaside Heights.

You know that ACME is an actual store, not just a Warner Bros. creation.

You never had school on Rosh Hashanah or Yom Kippur.

You take day trips to New York City.

The mafia runs half the businesses in your town.

You have mandatory recycling. Enforced by law.

In the woods behind your house, you can find couches, washing machines, and shoes.

You don't have to go to Red Lobster to get fresh seafood.

You go to at least one parade at the boardwalk each year.

You've made a meal out of Tastycakes, Herr's BBQ potato chips, and Pennsylvania Dutch Birch Beer.[/B]

You know the Atlantic City High School marching band can lay down some phat beats.

You know New Years is all about the Mummers and the Polar Bear club.

You smoke Parliament Lights.

You go to the local Fire Department barbeque in June.

Down the road, in the middle of nowhere, is an Egyptian restaurant and a custard stand with a minature golf course.

You know what custard is in South Jersey.

You can go bowling at 1:30 A.M. (with automatic scoring!)

In high school, you worked at a Friendly's.

Route 206 doesn't freak you out at night.

One time, a sea gull **** all over your head.

You once said, "It smells like Philadelphia in here."

You know that people from the 609 area code are "a little different".

Your mom still loves Bruce Springsteen.

You know it can be -10 degrees and 70 degrees in January in the same year.

There's a fruit and vegetable stand down the road.

You will always say "YO", and you'll say it often.

You scoff at tourists in Philadelphia.

Your town has an online commmunity.

At least one person brings Big Fizz to a party.

You go to another state and sit at a gas station wondering when the people will come out to pump your gas.

You have your own bucket for carmel corn refills.

You know that no matter how much they put into the Camden waterfront Camden is still Camden.

You have to mail your relocated friends tastykakes.

You think North Jersey is a different state and South Jersey deserves its own secession.

Your high school prom was at the Camden Aquarium or The Mansion in Voorhees.

You have season passes to Great Adventure.

You refuse to call Hoagies "subs."

You know where Olga's Diner is on rt 70.

You are tired of people not believing you're from jersey because you don't have a New York accent.

You drive by a farm every time you get in the car.

You know what "jimmies" are and refuse to call them anything else.

Eastern Regional High School has a rip list every year!

Your neighbor is either a painter, a plumber, a builder, or an electrician with a work truck in the driveway.

You have crossed all 5 bridges into Philly at one point in your life.

You take day trips to philly to walk on South Street.

You have had a near or close call experiences hitting a deer with your car.

You run around in the nearest patch of woods and play paint ball with your buddies.(I know people, but I don't)

You've considered renaming "the Garden State" to "the Hoagie State" ( )

You have a story about the "Hell Hole" ride in Wildwood.

You remember the ducks in the middle of Cherry Hill Mall.

You call the Berlin Farmer's Market the Berlin Auction or the Auction.

You took your report card to Clementon Park for free tickets.

You've had some of the best parties in a field.

Other people dont know what funnel cake and water ice is because everyone else calls it fried dough and slush.

You went "diner hopping" till the sun came up.

You don't acknoledge that it is tomorrow until either you go to sleep or the sun comes up.

You know where to buy a katana for less than $50.

You go on dates to diners and arcades.

You have empty Wawa half gallon iced tea bottles all over your car and room.

You've ever driven around aimlessly for hours with your friends saying "So, whatta we doin?"

You've ever said the phrase "look at fricken MacGyver over here!"

You know the difference betwine the train and the speedline.

The term "I think of you as a brother" turns into a whole family tree.

You ever drove all the way to the shore just to walk around for 5 minutes then drive back.

Your memories of places all consist of what you did there once when you were ****ed up.

You ever went over someone's house to hang out with their mom.

You have a knife collection, a PS2, a cell phone, a pager, and a computer but you can't afford to get your car fixed.

One of your hangouts is a parking lot.

You say "'lanic city", instead of Atlantic City.

You can't get that sand out of your toes no matter how long it's been there.

You haven't been able to find a decent stromboli since moving out of South Jersey.

You've seen a shack with a satellite dish.

You know that a Jug Handle is both a feature of the highway and a bar that looks like someone's house in Maple Shade.

You know of at least 3 bars where you know they won't card you.

You lived near a "crick" not a creek.

You don't recognize any one at your family reunion.

You say "gimme" instead of give me, or "com' mer" instead of come here.

You know a Chrissy and we all know she's gotten around!

You think we should sell north "Joisey" to New York for $24.

Everyone eventually starred at the Latin Casino.

You never could figure out which was the Black Horse Pike or The White Horse Pike.

You're a female and have beaten the crap out of at least one guy who wasn't your brother.

You ever taken your parents car while they were asleep or away, before you were old enough to drive.

You ever cut your foot on a broken bottle in a local stream.

You have gotten bad poison ivy from hiding in a bush to make weird noises at the people passing by.

There is a dead body somewhere in or near the stream by your house.

You have to drive at least 30-60 minutes to get to work in order to make more than $10 an hour.

You know what "pulling a camper" means and do it publicly when it is necessary.

You know that a "Yield" sign is merely a suggestion.

You've considered going to your high school late at night to check for ghosts in the halls rumoured haunted.[/B]

You think pit bulls are harmless.

You don't think you have an accent.

Half your high school went to Camden County College.

You know what the song "V-town" is about.

Your front yard is made out of stones.

Everything is "twenty minutes away". If you ask how long it takes to get any place in South Jersey, the person always says, "about twenty minutes". To get to a mall, "Oh, about 20 minutes". To get to the airport, "Mmm, about 20 minutes." To get from Runnemede to Philly, "Only about 20 minutes". Try it. Only the shore areas take more than "twenty minutes". They're usually "an hour and twenty minutes."

Thrift shopping with friends is an event.

You've intentionally stood in front of the tram car, and you're upset that it no longer stutters.

You remember the old Morey's Pier before the fire.

Your parents gave in and bought you a hermit crab when you were down the shore.

You curse off three drivers in two minutes.

You went to StoryBook Land as a kid.

You haven't moved out of state soley for the reason you know the food is that bad everywhere else.

WHIPOORWILL!! WHIPOORWILL!!

You know the one-day sale at JC Penny's really lasts three.

You live in a "dry town" and every road out of it has a liquor store at the town border.

Every time someone in Hollywood makes fun of Jersey, you're mad and proud at the same time.

Your big elementary school trip was to Springdale Farms.

You know what the conductor is going to say for every stop on the PATCO HighSpeedline.

Your neighborhood has a name that ties people together, as in "the kids"

Your shoes have turned black from being in Pennsauken.

You know at least 5 people who work at a prison.

You say "porta reeko" instead of puerto rico, as it should be pronounced.

You go to college and describe where you live in reference to how far you are from Cherry Hill.

You come home from college for christmas break and 75% of your HS graduating class is at the same diner you are at 3am.

You aren't scared of the speed line.

You don't even care when you leave your door unlocked.

More than one of your friends has spent more than a week at your house.

You've lived in a row home.

Making left turns just doesn't feel right anymore.

You have a super secret place to sled that in better than anywhere else in town!

You remember The Garden State Race Track and the day it burnt to the ground and all the tons of ashes that fell for miles.

You can spend the day at the Berlin Auction shopping at the outside flea market.

"Jeet?" makes sense when you hear it.

The only thing you can play on guitar is "Stairway to Heaven"

You were amazed Moorsetown was on MTV Cribs.

A member of your family does not have all of their teeth.

You know Voorhees used to be known as Kirkwood.

You had a birthday party at Xhilarama.

You've been to 2 or more festivals named after some kind of fruit (strawberry, apple, blueberry, lima bean).

You're astounded when a friend that moves tells you theres not a Wawa nor CVS withen a 10 mile radius of them.

Going to New York is a huge trip but Philly is someplace to go when you're bored.

You think Amish people are amazing.

Your whole school knows when each water ice place opens, and the line goes on forever!

You would drop everything you were doing and run to the voting polls right now if you heard we were voting to make North and South Jersey separate states.

Summer is a process, not a season.

You've ever been to Wheaton Village.

You know which places were built on indian burial grounds.

You've slept behind a Wawa.

You remember Caldor.

You've had a dinner with your friends for less than $3.

You don't know that in every other state, people get their liscenses when they're 16.

Everyone you know has had Confirmation but never goes to church.

After seeing a movie at the Ritz, you hang out at Tunes and then play Scrabble at Coffeeworks.

You know all of the "back roads" to get everywhere and prefer them to the expressway.

You think a mountain is any landform taller than your house.

You know what a "shoe-bie" is and can pick one out at the beach.

You go to Delaware to buy smokes.

You can name all the flavors of salt water taffy.

You can smell and know when it's low tide.

You remember the bad gypsy moth years.

You eat at restaurants that have locations I, II, III, IV, and V.

You know that you don't put ketchup on boardwalk fries.

You get three 50's in a row when you play skeeball.

Donald Trump is mentioned at least daily in your local paper.

 

[tink2020]

You know you're from Cincinnati when....

Your idea of a three-way is chilli over spaghetti topped with cheddar

You know what goetta is - and you've eaten it

You hate Cleveland, but you don't know why, and you've never been there

You think Pete Rose and Marge Schott were railroaded

You say "Please?" instead of "Excuse me?" (no, but my mom does)

You think Northern Kentucky is part of Ohio

You've been to California, Wyoming, Coney Island, and Over-the-Rhine in one day

There are less than 100 murders a year, and you still think you're in Detroit

You think Dayton is a Third World country

What groundhog? It's the St. Patrick's Day parade leprechaun that forecasts how much longer winter will last.

Losing football teams draw more fans than winning baseball teams.

Indiana is about 20 miles away, but it takes about four hours to get there.

It's too cold in the winter, and too hot and humid in the summer, to ever stay outside for very long.

You drive to Columbus or Louisville to avoid the prices at the Cincinnati airport.

City council members hold debates on whether or not they should debate in the first place.

Tourists still flock downtown to catch a glimpse of cast members from "WKRP," even though the show hasn't aired on network television since 1984, and the show was filmed in LA anyway.

You ask lifetime residents where the President Taft house is, but they don't know either.

If you do something -- anything -- in public long enough, sooner or later it will be banned.

Your low-fat diet is never low enough to exclude Graeter's ice cream.
(NEVER a diet that should exclude Graeter's!)
You get through winter listening to Marty and Joe's broadcasts from the grapefruit leagues.

Big Red Smokies are a ballpark treat, not cause to dial 9-1-1.

If necessary, the city could easily be sliced into two new cities: East and West, and it would take 20 years for anyone to notice something happened.

Chocolate and cinnamon, not peppers and beans, are in your chili.

You can drive 30 minutes in any direction to hear a different accent than your own.

You can accurately judge people's social status by which Kroger's store they frequent.

You can go to any church festival in any neighborhood on any weekend and see at least five people you either work with, went to school with, or dated.

Even the slightest mention of former baseball commissioner A. Bartlett Giamatti makes your blood boil and your ears steam.

If the temperature hits 45 degrees, and the sun comes out in any month between November and April, people walk around downtown wearing shades and no jackets.

The top stories on the local 6 o'clock evening news look suspiciously like the articles you read in the newspaper that very morning -- and even use the same quotes.

Any carbonated beverage is a "coke." (not for this soda-girl... but I do get some weird looks )

Your favorite convenient store sounds like a labor union.

You can't hear the words "Mike Brown" without getting angry.

You honestly believe that Pete Rose should be in the Baseball Hall Fame.

You have more stadiums, coliseums, and arenas than you know what to do with.

It doesn't seem weird to you that everyone has an Uncle Al.

Your favorite Coney Island isn't in New York.

You like Nick Clooney better than George Clooney. (It's a close call.... but it's George we're talking about here. I DO know where he grew up, though )

You know how Jerry Springer got his start. (unfortunately)

You know what a pony keg is.

You have friends and neighbors with names like Machenheimer, Guckenberger, Schlottman, Schoenling, and Schweitering.

You know that cars (like eggs) are cheaper in the country.

An all-boys or all-girls school doesn't seem that odd to you

You think a mixed marriage is when an East Sider marries a West Sider.

You know the difference between Hudy and "Who Dey."

You know what cream ale is, and you think that cream soda should be bright red.

You think Kentucky is only slightly more civilized than Afghanistan.

You know in which state the Greater Cincinnati Airport is located.

You actually understand the word, "CRAVE" and white castle burgers. (yuck)

You can almost name the seven "hills" minus one or two.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Cincinnati.

 

[perdidobay]

You Know You're From Memphis When...

Your idea of a great first date is going to Crumpy's or D'Bo's for a great dinner.
...uhhhhh, no

You actually like Church's Chicken.
again, no

You know where "P.V." is located.
I don't even know what the PV is

You've been to Dave's skating rink on Third Street.
no

You remember when Big Daddy's on Elvis Presley was da bomb.
no

Your parents dropped you off at the Mall of Memphis.
it wasnt around when I was a kid

You remember when Micheal Jackson and the Jackson family was on top of Woolco on Third and Florida.
no

You know somebody nicknamed "Skinny Pimp."
no

You know what 304 means in someone's pager when they turn it upside down.
no

You wash your car every Friday night just to go to FEDEX.
no

You've spent the night at Liberty Land Labor Day Weekend!!
no

You remember Club No Name or Da Expo!
no

You owned (or still own) a DJ Spanish Fly mix tape.
no

You've been to Channel Three Drive
I know were it is....

You have eaten Buffalo Fish
no

You love Jack Pirtle's Gravy
no..never been to jack pirtles.

If you referred to someone as, or were a "prep-type"
no

If you have or had a family member with a Jherri Curl
no

You know about Voodoo Village
yes...

You've had a date at Ellens, Leech's, 4 Way Grill, Melanie's or L&H on Third street.
no

You've eaten at Lotta Burger, Big Dip, or Hungry I Snack Bar.
no

Your summer vacation includes going to Atlanta or Biloxi.
no

You have "free cable"
no

All directions start with, "Go down I-240..."
no

"Sugar" is a more common form of address than "Miss". So is "Honey".
no

Presley can only be pronounced by a native, so do not attempt the pronunciation. People will simply tilt their heads to the right and stare at you.
yes

You know Memphis is pronounced "MEM---PHUS.
yes!

Construction crews aren't doing their job properly unless they close down all lanes except one during rush hour.
this is true everywhere!

People think Republican means "White" and Democrat means "Black"
yes..unfortunatly

You can elect your mayor, school board, and day-care provider with one vote.
just about

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Memphis.
Most of these would ring true to someone of a different race and economic background than me. But then Memphis is 70% of both ( different race and income level)

 

[MissMinnie]

To all you Jersey people out there.........one exception to the shore not beach thing...........Those of us who lived at the shore did say go to the beach since we were already at the shore!!!! FYI, we called all you non shore types "bennies"!!!!

 

[Forevryoung]

You know you are from Long Island when: (I only posted the ones that applied to me which was most!)

You know someone who went to Chaminade.

Jones Beach Theater is the best place in the world to see a concert. CASE CLOSED!


Billy Joel said it best, "Either you date a rich girl from the North Shore, or a cool girl from the South Shore."

What's the big deal about the Hamptons?

If you're not from Long Island or NYC, you're not really from New York.

You don't go to Manhattan, you go to "the City"

You know the Belt Parkway sucks!

You never, ever want to "change at Jamaica..."

You never realize you have an accent until you leave.

You know where at least one strip club is.

You can name at least three bands that came from Long Island.

You curse. A lot.

Is Huntington really that cool? (YES!)

You've been to Utopia at least once. (my friend's dad growing up owned it)

The darn geese are everywhere!

If your parents didn't, your grandparents lived in the city.

At some point in your life you or someone you know has owned an animal that came from North Shore Animal League.

You actually remember when you felt safe swimming at Bar Beach and Hempstead Harbor.

Commack movie theatre scares you

You walk around the mall aimlessly.

You drive around your town with your friends, and that's the most exciting part of your evening.

On the weekend, your evening consists of seeing a movie, going bowling, or playing pool.

When you walk in the city and you see two men holding hands...it becomes normal to you.

No word ends in an ER, just an AH.

You live in the shadow of the greatest city in the world, but you never go there.

When you're away from Long Island, you love it and when you're there, you don't.

You know that the beach sucks during the day and is the most magical place in the world at night

You know the exact point at which Queens turns into Nassau simply on intuition.

You're still waiting for a bridge to Connecticut.

No matter what you do, you end up at the diner.

High school sports aren't that important.

You've never been to Times Square on New Year's Eve.

You've tried to find the Amityville Horror house.

Each one of your diverse friends mercilessly makes fun of his own background.

You love that salty smell of the ocean.

No, you don't want mustard on that burger!

The most exciting day of your summer is when all tickets to every Jones Beach show go on sale.

You want the Yankees to stay in the Bronx, but would probably go to more games if they moved to Manhattan.

You can order a pizza pie and a soda and people will understand.

You felt slighted when Snapple sold out.

You don't associate Fire Island with gay men.

You wanted Hooters to open simply to piss off "decency" groups.

You watched a game show and wondered, "why are these people so happy that they won a trip to New York?"

When you hear Billy Joel's "Scenes From an Italian Restaurant" you try to figure out what places on Long Island he's talking about.

You know that parts of the Godfather were filmed on LI.

You always liked Billy Joel, but as soon as you leave, you love Billy Joel.

You've been to the Tanger Outlets and came home with nothing to show for it.

You have or someone you know has fallen asleep on the LIRR and ended up in one of these three places; Babylon, Port Washington or Hicksville.

You think Islip MacArthur airport is cute and you enjoy watching it grow up.

Your parents took you to Nathans or Carvel

You hate the radio commercials for the Dublin Pub

Public beach? What's that?

You can correctly pronouce places like Happauge, Commack, Islip, Islandia, Massapequa.

You know the location of 6 malls and a dozen McDonalds and 36 7-11's.

You grew up thinking Chinese food was a basic food group.

You're used to driving down the street in December and seeing more light-up menorahs than you can shake a latka at. In fact, even your non-Jewish friends know what Matzoh is. And you've never driven more than 10 miles without seeing a temple.

Oh, your parents are from Brooklyn? So are mine!

Yes, admit it, you've cruised the Pike.

Your elementary school promoted dodge ball as the top gym activity.

You were upset when all the Roy Rogers turned into Wendy's.

You consider nachos and cheese at the Coliseum to be a suitable dinner date.

 

[Virgo10]

I may Live in Florida but I'll always Be from Massachusetts.

The person driving in front of you is going 70 mph and you are cursing him for going too slow.
Actually I find that more true down here.

When ordering a tonic, you mean a Coke...not quinine water.
Yup.

You actually enjoy driving around rotaries.
Yes and I may live in the only town in Florida with one.

You almost feel disappointed when someone doesn't flip you the bird when you cut them off or steal their parking space.
Not really.

You know how to pronounce the names of towns like Worcester, Billerica, Haverhill, Barre and Cotuit.
Worcester = Woh-ster. Billerica = Bill-a-rick-ah. Heverhill=Hay-ver-ill.
Barre=Barry. Cotuit=Co-tu-it. Sometimes they're pronounce just the way they look.

You have driven to New Hampshire on a Sunday in order to get beer.
Not since I was a kid.

You know that there are two Bulger brothers, and that they're both crooks.
True, true, true!

You know what they sell at a packie.
You mean they're called something else in other places??

You know at least one bar where you can get something to drink after last call.
During my flaming youth, I knew a place in Southie that you could take out beer on a Sunday.

You can actually find your way around Boston.
Yes, but on the T. Driving is suicidal.

Evacuation Day is a recognized holiday.
Umm sure, it just happens to fall on St. Patrick's Day.

You know what First Night is.
A family non drinking event. Well if you believe that, I've got this really cool bridge I'll sell ya.

You know at least one guy named Sean, Pat, Whitey, Red, Bud or Seamus.
Actually, no.

You think the rest of the country owes you for Thanksgiving and Independence Day.
Not to mention Halloween.

You have never been to Cheers.
Nope but I've walked by it.

When the words 'WICKED' and 'GOOD' go together.
Always unless something is even better than wicked good. Then it's wicked and a word I bet the censors will filter.

You knew that there was no chance in hell that the Pats would move to Hartford.
Was "pretty" sure of that.

You have gone to at least one party at UMass.
No but BU, Boston College and a few others, yes.

The curse of the Bambino is taught in public schools.
Not any more!

You own a "Yankees Suck" shirt or hat.
No but I wish I did.

You think Doug Flutie is the greatest athlete ever.
Doug Flutie is a God!

You remember exactly where you were when the ball rolled through Buckner's legs.
Oh lord, yes and I DON'T want to talk about it!!

You pray for the Red Sox to win the World Series not this season, but in your lifetime.
I did do that.

You know how to make a frappe.
Yes but I try never to ask for one in Florida. You get funny looks.

You know that "Big Dig" is also a kind of ice cream you can get at Brigham's.
I didn't know that.

You actually know how to merge from 6 lanes of traffic down to one.
Shudder.

You never go to "Cape Cod", you go "down the Cape".
Yup or when you go to Maine it's also a down thing. Down East.

You think that Roger Clemens, Wade Boggs and Derek Jeter are more evil than Whitey Bulger.
Aww, not Wade. A-Rod should be on that list.

You went to Old Sturbridge Village, Plymouth Plantation, or both, on field trip in grammar school.
Both, several times.

You're aware that there is a town, somewhere in Massachusetts, named Brimfield where they have the biggest outdoor antique market in the world.
Yup but I've never been there.

You can drive to the mountains and the ocean all in one day.
Done that.

You know that the Mass Pike is some sort of strange weather dividing line.
So is 128.

You know that P-Town isn't the name of a new rap group.


You know that Ludlow is 90% Portuguese and that Fall River is 90% Lebanese.
Didn't know that.

You do not recognize the letter "R" as a part of the English language.
Usually not.

You've called something "wicked pissa"
See the Wicked Good line.

You have driven to either Rhode Island, New Hampshire or Vermont for a tattoo.
No but my daughter did.

You see people like Steven Tyler (Aerosmith), Dicky Barret (The Mighty, Mighty Bosstones), Tracy Bonham, Evan Dando (The Lemonheads) and Ric Ocasek (The Cars) in the local supermarket and it doesn't phase you.
Nope, never seen any of them but my son saw Steven Tyler once in a restaurant.

You've slammed on your brakes to deter a tailgater.
LOL! Yes and I've done it down here too.

Know at least three Tony's, one Vinnie and a Frank(ie)
Nope, just one Frank.

Paranoia sets in if you can't see a Dunkin Donuts, ATM or CVS within eyeshot at all times.
Yes! The closest Dunkin Donuts down here is right near WDW.

You keep an ice scraper and can of de-icer on the floor of your car...year round.
I did that.

You still try to order curly fries from Burger King.
Nope.

You order iced coffee in January.
Not me but my kids would do that.

You know what candlepin bowling is.
And Duck Pins!

You drive 45 minutes to New Hampshire to save $5 in sales tax.
Nah.

You've pulled out of a side street and used your car to block oncoming traffic so you can make a left.
Who? Me??

You've bragged about the money you've saved at The Christmas Tree Shop.
Waaa! I miss the one in Stoughton.

You know what a "regular" coffee is.
Yup.

 

[TDC Nala]

You Know You're From Washington DC When...
You say you're from DC, but you actually live in VA or MD but are too tired to explain where.

You don't consider exploding man hole covers to be an unusual occurrence.

You know where the Pentagon really is but never bother to correct anyone about its location.

When it takes you 45 minutes to drive 3 miles on I-66, 95, 395, 495, 50, 123, 29, or 270, it's a pretty good day.

There are at least fifteen ways to get everywhere and you know which way to go based on the weather, time of day, current political climate, terrorism road closures, and whether you are coming or going.

You pay more money in parking tickets in a year than you do in medical bills, college costs and rent combined.

You know that driving through Georgetown, you will hear the music of the car next to you louder than you can hear your own.

"I got stuck behind a motorcade" is a common and real excuse for being late.

"Finding a parking space" actually becomes an appointment on your calendar. (E.g.. 7:00-8:00 Gym, 8:30-9:00PM - find a parking space, 9:00-10:30PM - Dinner reservations.)

You've never once been to Wal-Mart and don't even know if there is one.

When you say you're going to the mall and you don't mean shopping.

You never refer to the 'Metro' as the 'subway'.

You elbow tourists out of the way on the Metro escalators to "gently" emind them to WALK LEFT, STAND RIGHT.

Going to work early means being there by 9:00AM.

You don't bat an eye at 500 politicians and businessmen in suits running like their lives depended on it just to catch a Metro that will be followed by another in 90 seconds.

You call it Targ鴬 not Target, and are well aware that the one in Alexandria is just a "tad different".

When Washington National Airport is and will always be "WASHINGTON NATIONAL", not "Reagan National".

You can tell by people's cars where they live and maybe even what neighborhood.

You've claimed that there's nothing to do on a weekend night even when you have the entire nation's capitol to explore.

You have the Metro map memorized, yet act like you don't know when someone asks you how to get to Metro Center.

You meet someone else who says they're from the DC area and you realize they live two hours away from you.

You notice that there's been construction on the same stretch of highway for the past 5 years and you've never see anyone working on it.

You know you've crossed into Northern Virginia, without ever seeing a sign, only because your speedometer goes from 60 to 0.

You know that Vietnam is no longer in the South Pacific, it's now been re-located to Seven Corners.

The few times you have gotten lost in DC you have somehow ALWAYS ended up in Anacostia and every road out somehow leads back to Anacostia.

You realize that I-395 is Northern Virginia's version of NASCAR.

There is no such thing as North, South, East, or West on the beltway, it's just go "that" way!(Inner circle / outer circle)

You go anywhere on the Eastern Shore, Rehoboth, Dewey, Ocean City, Skyline Drive, or the Outer Banks for vacation and everyone you meet is from DC

Snow means rain to you

Ice on the roads just means that you pay more attention to other cars, but still go 75 mph on the highways

You can see the national cathedral from almost anywhere

You know at least 2 rowers

You know that Georgetown is NOT only a school

You consider Northern VA to be in no way similar to southern VA

You know which bridges to cross to get to Maryland or VA

You actually know goes on in Dupont circle

You can't go to Tysons Mall without seeing someone you know!!

You have a few friends who don't know what their parents do...It's Top Secret government work.

People don't ask you if Chevy Chase is named after the actor.

You can harmonize perfectly with the alert for "Doors Closing" on the Metro

50% of your senior class went to Mason, JMU, Tech, VCU or UVA

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from DC.

 

[monarchsfan16]

The ones that apply to me are in bold. And like soccercruiser, I have a lot that apply to Mass too. Guess I've been too heavily influenced by the transplants
You Know You're From New Hampshire When...

You say "wicked" instead of "really."
Guilty, and was recognized as a New Englander in Yellowstone because I exclaimed wicked awesome as Old Faithful erupted

Your idea of a good meal is Katie's Country Kitchen
never heard of it

You drive a Suburu
heck no, I drive an SUV

Half of your clothes are from L.L. Bean
pretty close

You rather vacation in New Zealand than Florida


Motorcycle Weekend is the highlight of your summer
Actually it's the weekend I dread

When you take your yearly trip into Boston, you "pak ya cah in Havad Yad"

"Vacation" means going to Burlington for the weekend.
no no no

You go out of state and don't understand what "tax" means on your receipt
I have the hardest time understanding that tax thing

You think of the major food groups as venison, beer, fish, and berries.
no

You refer to the Patriots as "we".

You can identify a Massachusetts accent.

You can visit Berlin, New London, Bethlehem, Lisbon, Lebanon and Dublin all in one afternoon.
I have been to Berlin, Bethlehem and Dublin all in one day.

Down South to you means Boston.
not quite

You consider Manchester exotic.
If that's exotic I'm scared

You don't have a coughing fit from one sip of Ballantine Ale.

You can actually pronounce Kancamagus.
Yes and it's wicked funny listening to tourists try

You know what a bubbler is.

Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new machine shed.
My stepdad did that

You go out for fish fry every Friday.

You can recognize someone from Massachusetts from their driving.
We were about 10 miles behind someone on some flat highway in Nebraska (I 80 I believe). Saw someone and instantly knew they were from Mass. We eventually passed them, and we were right!

 

[soccercruiser87]

You can actually pronounce Kancamagus.
Yes and it's wicked funny listening to tourists try

that is so true, i love to listen to tourists try to say it lol

 

[simba928]

Some of the Pittsburgh ones are true and a couple of them need to be changed to reflect current times. LOL. (the bold ones are true)

"Hey Yuz Guyz" is your traditional greeting.

You know the time and location of every Wing Night in a 10 mile radius. (that has been brought up at least once a week in my Marketing class alone)

You know the location of the following towns, know someone from them and have spent time there: Monongahela, Altoona, Bethlehem, Ligonier, Harmony, and Wilmerding.

You've memorized lines from the movie "Flashdance".

If you're a guy, your biggest fear is seeing your best friend drive into the "fruit loop". You're second biggest fear is seeing him drive out with Kordel Stewart.

If you're a girl, you're biggest fear is getting hit on by a hairy-chested man, heavily weighted in gold chains, who refers to his friends as "junior" at Chauncey's.

Your latest cultural experience: On your way to partying at Slippery Rock University, having to stop your car to let the Amish buggy cross the street.

As your out-of-town friends brag about their latest trips to Europe, you think to yourself, "Polish Hill will suffice."

You eat out at least once a week at a mafia-owned Italian pizza parlor.

Your father has worked for the same company for over 20 years.

You don't see what all the hype is about Disney World when Kennywood is just around the corner. (I take offense to that. I HATE Kennywood)

You're having a hard time on where to take your date out for dinner and a night on the town: - "meat on a stick" in the south side and the guzzling IC Light at Jack's... Or splitting an order of "O fries" and guzzling IC Light at Peter's Pub.

" N at' " is eloquently added to the end of every sentence. (not for me, but N at' is classic Pittsburghese along with "Jeet Jet?")

You've taken deliberate field trips to the Andy Warhol museum.

You water ski on the Youghiogheny River Lake.

You feel the only good bands out there are Donny Iris, Joe Grushecky, The Blue Oyster Cult, and of course.... Rusted Root. (not for me, but for most people. Donny Iris and Joe Grushecky are HUGE)

You're more worried about Jerome Bettis's health than your own. (change Jerome Bettis to Ben Roethlisberger and you've got the topic of conversation from week to week)

You own more than one original Terrible Towel. (not for me, but for most people. When you pass someone with a Terrible Towel tucked into the front of their pants, you think nothing of it.)

You don't understand what all the hype is about for Rolling Rock beer. You've been drinking it for years, although Penn Pilsner is better.

You consider a great vacation a trip to Conneaut Lake or Lake Erie. For something a little more exotic, a trip to the Jersey shore.

You're 35 years old, have never been outside of Allegheny County, and don't see the need to leave. (for me, I cannot wait to get out of here. LOL)

You only own four spices: salt, pepper, Heinz ketchup, and the bottle of Trappey's Red Devil you swiped from Primanti's.

For the life of you, you can't understand why your all your out-of-town friends don't get the "fries and cole slaw" thing...

You have 101 favorite recipes for kolbasi and sauerkraut.

Words like: hoagie; chipped ham; pop; and gumband actually mean something to you.

You can use the phrase "Firehall Wedding" and not even bat an eye.

You walk carefully when it is "slippy" outside.

You often go down to the "crick". (my grandma says that ALL the time, "When we were kids, we used to go play in the crick down by them train tracks"

You have to "red up", before company comes over. (Again, my grandma says that and I usually say something like "Why do you want it red, why not green?"

You've ever gotten hurt by falling into a "jaggerbush".

You know that Ahia is a river, a boulevard, and a state.

You've ever "warshed" or "wershed" the laundry. (that annoys the heck out of me, my cousins and aunt say it ALL the time)

You know you can't drive too fast on back roads,cause-udda-deer.

You've drank an "Arn" .

You've told someone to "quit jaggin around".

You know that Clinton, Monaca, and Beaver, are actually names of towns.

You've called someone a 'jaggoff'.

You hear "you guyses", or "yins" and don't think twice.

You hate Cleveland, although you've never been there. (not for me, but it is true for most people)

You drink "pop", eat "hoagies", pierogies, and gyros(jy-rows).

You know what a still mill is.

You can find Zillionopal on a map.

You go 'food shoppin' at 'Jine Iggle'. (again, not for me, but yes, A LOT of people do go "food shoppin' at "Jine Iggle" AKA Giant Eagle)

You believe that "Ize" is the abbreviaton for "I was.

You know someone from 'Sliberty, E-sliberty, or Wesliberty.

You know the Pittsburgh Zoo is in 'Hilinpark' and have been there for school field trips.

You know what is meant by "The Point".

Chipped ham was always in your refrigerator when you were growing up.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Pittsburgh.


And I have a couple more to add-
You look forward to the great Pierogi race and think nothing of seeing a giant pierogi wearing earrings and carrying a purse eating a Primanti Bros. sandwich.

You know how to spell Roethlisberger.

 

[monarchsfan16]

I got a tag from this thread