You Know You Are In Texas In Summer If ...

[fklhou]

YOU KNOW YOU ARE IN TEXAS IN SUMMER IF ...


The best parking place is determined by shade rather than distance.

Hot water now comes out of both taps.

It takes less time to make sun tea than instant tea.

You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.

The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a bit chilly.

The weatherman's interpretation of a "cold front" means the temp may dip to 86.

You discover that in July it takes only 2 fingers to steer your car. And that it's possible to get sunburned through a car window.

You get third degree burns to your hand from opening the car door.

Stepping outdoors at 7:30 a.m. is somewhat like stepping into a blast furnace.

Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up laying on the pavement and cooking to death?"

You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.

The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.

The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out butter, salt and pepper it.

Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs, cows are giving evaporated milk.

And the trees are whistling for dogs to give them relief.
_______________

One of my partners sent this to me.

 

[nativetxn]

LOL, all of these are true

You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.

I learned that the hard way when I was a little girl and was silly enough to walk barefoot on the road. It was sticky it burned me too

 

[Grog]

Oh, how true.......

 

[TigerBear]

These are so true...
The best parking place is determined by shade rather than distance.
Hot water now comes out of both taps.

This is just plain funny....
And the trees are whistling for dogs to give them relief.

 

[UrsulasDaBomb]

ROTFLMAO*
As a native Texan..these are ALL too true!*LOL*I learned 'bout the asphalt one a few months back when I was walking back from the pool barefoot and got serious burns/blisters on the soles of my feet from the temp and couldnt walk for 2 days!!

As a kid,we also used to take raw eggs out and throw them on the sidewalk.Whosever cooked the fastest won.

 

[Princess_Aurora]

The weatherman's interpretation of a "cold front" means the temp may dip to 86.

This is true too. The weather men keep talking about cold fronts and we find ourselves thinking, "Where'd it go?" Well, you know the other day when you woke up and it was like 90? Well, that was the cold front.

 

[Planogirl]

Shade? In North Texas?

 

[Grog]

Shade? In North Texas?

LOL....I have a really good friend who used to live in Plano (he's in Addison now). I used to tell him he might as well be living on the moon due to the lack of trees. We once drove from Plano to Arlington in his ex-roommates convertible in the middle of summer with the top down (and back again a couple of hours later). BIG mistake. Talk about burned!!!

 

[Planogirl]

We once drove from Plano to Arlington in his ex-roommates convertible in the middle of summer with the top down

Grog, never EVER drive on Hwy 635 otherwise known as "the road where cars never move" in an open convertible! But you know that now.

 

[Grog]

Yes, one 55 gallon drum of aloe vera later.........

 

[amid chaos]

LOL...I love these.

 

[UrsulasDaBomb]

ROTFLMAO*