Wwyd?

[lovinpoohbear]

A close friend of mine asked me to babysit her DS 3 months old for just this week due to the sitter having a death in the family and had to go overseas.I agreed since I am home this week with my 2 ds. (they start school next week) Anyway, I told her I really couldn't babysit on Friday because my ds has his preschool orientation at 12:30. This friend promised me she would pick up the baby at 12:00.She knows that I don't want to drive with a newborn in my car. I will drive my own babies but I don;t feel comfortable with a baby that young that isn't mine! That being said, she calls me now and tells me that she needs me to drop off the baby at her SIL's house because she has a hair appointment? So I say to her Well than, why don't you ask her to watch the baby all day than because I don't feel comfortable driving with a little baby. She says Oh I already did but she can't because she has a doctor appointment in the morning.* HUH?? I am inconvencing myself to help her and now I feel so used and stomped all over! This friend has helped me countless times though, from helping to make goody bags for my kids parties and also stayed with me last week for 5 1/2 hours when I had multiple tests done, MRI, CT scan etc. (she stayed with me because I was so nervous of the results) I am fine thank god, everything is ok.Part of me tells me to just call and tell her You know what, I am really not comfortable driving the baby. You will have to find someone else. But the other part of me feels like if I say this, I risk the friendship.So WWYD? Tell her no or ask if her SIL can pick up the baby when she is done with the appointment?And can you believe that the reason is because my friend has a hair appointent?? I think thats why I feel so angry, I think its selfish on her part.Sorry for a long vent, I am thankful to have the disboards because we are in the same circle of friends and I hate to talk about someone when they know them!

 

[pikafreaks]

she has a hair appointment

Wow.. that kind of stings. Sounds like she's really a good friend though, and those are so hard to find.

It was me, I'd just take the safest way and drop the baby off.......

 

[minkydog]

The mom has a hair appointment? huh! I think she just needs to change it. You're already babysitting for her the rest of the week. You've told her twice that you have somehting at 12:30 Friday. And you don't want to or plan to drive her baby around. NO! just say no! She'll find somebody, or she'll take care of her own baby!

 

[mncherokee]

Hair appointment?!?!? It's one thing to watch a child so someone can work... another entirely for hair appointments! My DH is a child care supervisor and has had to wait to come home at night because the parents decided to do personal things before picking up their children! One sat in the pkg lot and talked on their cell phone for over 1/2 hour before picking up their child (making my DH late going home!)

I wouldn't take someone else's infant. She will either need to pick the child up before you need to go or have SIL do it. You might just tell her that you can't on Friday and let her find another option since you have your child to think about!

 

[thegrimdwarf]

I think I'd probably just suck it up and drop the baby off (though I totally get why you're uncomfortable transporting someone else's infant). I remember back when my kids were 3 months old - I was *tired* and I'm sure wasn't the picture of clarity and consideration when it came to others. I'm betting I was pretty desperate for a haircut, too.

So, since she sounds like a wonderfully supportive friend, I'd give her a pass on this one if you can. If it happens again, then say something.

 

[Scrapfriend]

Tell her to have the SIL bring the baby over, or she will have to find someone else to babysit. End of story, she is asking you for the favor, you are willing to help her on your terms. You are doing your part, now she has to make it work for you. A reasonable person would not be asking you to do something you are not comfortable with. Don't feel bad, you are helping her already by doing the other days. It is her problem to work out, not yours.

 

[dis-happy]

Wow, she sounds like a really good friend, maybe she couldn't make her hair appt. last week because she was with you that whole day, who knows. But in my book I'd just do it for the friendship. You should ask her to leave you the infant carseat "just in case" for the rest of the days anyway, you never know when you might have to leave the house unexpectedly. I'm sure you drive your own kids around safely, and your friend trusts you a lot to let you drive her baby around, just try not to worry and trust that everything will be fine.

 

[dougsmom98]

I would probably grumble a little, but because of the circumstances with her sitter, I would just do whatever she needed me to do. She sounds like a good friend and I am sure she would do the same for you. The fact that she called her SIL and asked already means that she knows that it is inconvenient for you and she tried to avoid it. I know it is just for hair, but it must be important enough to her not to cancel.

 

[Belle4mygrl]

Yes, I would be upset and fuss about it to my husband BUT I would do it.

Sorry you are having a time with this.

 

[SharpMomOfTwo]

I'm sorry - I understand how you feel, but I also think a hair appointment is improtant. Just because we are mothers, and of course our kids come first, doesn't mean that we don't deserve some pampering too! Maybe its the only appointment she could get, maybe she doesn't have much family around to help her out....
Having said that, she seems like she has been a good friend to you, so I would just do it, but thats just me.

 

[karibritt01]

Try to get her SIL to pick the baby up after her appt... that would be easiest. Tell her that it will be hectic trying to get you and the kids ready and out the door, and would be so much easier on you if SIL had already picked up the baby. But, if that doesn't work out, I would just drive the baby. Friends that will spend 5 hours sitting in a hospital with you, are hard to come by. It isn't worth damaging a friendship over.

 

[jensen]

This friend obviously trusts your ability to drive with her infant in your car, so I'd say just do it.

 

[In a hurry]

I'm sorry - I understand how you feel, but I also think a hair appointment is improtant. Just because we are mothers, and of course our kids come first, doesn't mean that we don't deserve some pampering too! Maybe its the only appointment she could get, maybe she doesn't have much family around to help her out....
Having said that, she seems like she has been a good friend to you, so I would just do it, but thats just me.

Um...if I was taking advantage of a friend for an extended time, there is no way I'd make it longer/harder for something so selfish as a hair appointment.

 

[lovinpoohbear]

I am the OP, my friends SIL is coming to pick up the baby in the morning. I told my friend that I was very uncomfortable driving such a little baby around.
She is a GOOD friend and I am glad this is resolved. Driving to the SIL's house is out of the way and through many busy roads.
I feel better now that the SIL is picking up the baby.

 

[In a hurry]

I'm so glad it worked out for you. It is a relief that the friend 'gets it."