wwyd? I have a problem

[Hannathy]

AprilGail my DD had a girl like that in her class and get this the kids were told to not do anything if this child hit or kicked them! I told my DD she did not have to let her hit or hurt her and to block her or fight back if necessary. I told her I would deal with the school if she got in trouble. It is ridiculous. If they can not be in a classroom safely then they need to be in a different setting and be held accountable for their actions - this girl would grin when she knew she got away with hurting someone. I'm sure the camp was afraid to refuse this child because he is labelled and they know these parents are sue happy

 

[CEDmom]

Outside of taking your DS home I don't know what more you could have done. I do think the Dad should have taken his son home. He obviously can't handle being there and needs closer supervision. I also think the Director should be taking this more seriously.

 

[binny]

Well no news is good news I suppose. They are only allowed a call out if its an emergency. So Im hoping its been handled.


The good news this is the last function that they will attend together for a year. DS is going into the teen group and this kid is a year behind. So where they used to see each other at school and at church and at basketball, they will only pass at church and not be in any of the same groups.

I hate feeling this way towards any kid! Especially one where his mom and I are friends. I just cant handle how he acts. We seperated him all the time ( as I said we taught him in church last year) from the other kids for acting out and being physical.


Cams best friend from down road the road is there as well. He goes to another church in our denomination and went up with their group. I had requested that they be in the same cabin so I hope that worked out.


This is the first time he has left us on his own for this long. That only adds to my stress. We've left him with sitters and the PT nanny that we use when dh and I travel but he's always been here or at my moms and with his sisters.
This is the first time he has been on his own.


*sigh*


Thanks again.

 

[famofsix]

Today I was talking to his dad and we looked over by a corner and Cam is kicking him. I couldnt see Cam until I got there, I run out and find the kids hands around Cams NECK!!! He was choking him! Hard. Cam has finger marks around his neck! grrrrrrrrrrr. I took a peice out of the kid and then his dad took another thankfully. I was LIVID!

Just to clarify my response....I in no way condone choking....however this incident seems to me that while this ADHD kid was wrong in his response it was not an incident where we know what happened since when you saw the situation your son was kicking him. In my old church, kids would pick on the ADHD kids with WORDS and make him so mad he would blow up. Do you know what happened? I think the ADHD dad is hoping his kid gets something out of camp and that's why he did not bring him home. If this ADHD kid's behavior continues to be a problem, sure, he should be sent home. But let's give the kid a chance. His dad did discipline him and you did "take care of the situation" the best you could. It's camp, not a school classroom, you may be surprise how much better ADHD kids act outside of school without the pressure to perform academically. Maybe in the camp environment this kid will have a better chance of making friends and behaving appropriately. Alot of times parents with kids like this let counselors know their child's profile before camp so that the people can anticipate which kids need more one on one supervision. Hopefully, your camp has this kind of program so that all kids are welcome to camp. The director probably wants to give this kid a chance. Remember, it's church camp...maybe his life will change for the better. I say love him, don't kick him out. BUT if he continues to be a physical problem...his bags should be packed and parents should go get him.

 

[famofsix]

I hate feeling this way towards any kid! Especially one where his mom and I are friends. I just cant handle how he acts. We seperated him all the time ( as I said we taught him in church last year) from the other kids for acting out and being physical.

Take a deep breath, what you feel is so normal. We all want to protect our kids. I hope Cam has a great time.

 

[binny]

I should probably have put that better.
I saw my sons legs kicking out at him, he connected once that I saw, the kids hands were still around my sons neck and he couldnt breathe, thats why he was kicking him. They were both standing.


But, yes, I want him to find help. He is an incredibly smart kid who has loads of potential but, as with many gifted kids ( my own included at one point years ago) he has social delays. Thankfully my son grew out of that a few years ago. This child doesnt seem to get that his actions towards people make people not like him.

 

[famofsix]

Binny,
I am sorry your son got hurt. I hope everything works out okay. I am probably in the minority of wanting the kid to get a second chance. But my heart goes out to kids that have social problems especially in church where people tend to push them aside and they really need love. I actually commend your kids camp for not kicking this kid out and actually trying to help him. I don't have any kids with this type of problem but I have worked with kids like this and I admit they can be very difficult to love. But thankfully, over the years I have seen some success stories of kids who did change because of prayer and loving and supportive adults
I said a prayer for Cam and this kid. I truly hope they have a great camp experience. Write Cam a little note for his pillow so when he gets home he knows how much you missed him.
Proverb 3:5-6

 

[famofsix]

I'm sure the camp was afraid to refuse this child because he is labelled and they know these parents are sue happy

or maybe this camp accepts all kids and has proper supervison. Let's not assume the boy's parents are sue happy.