would you be offended

[luv2nascar]

If your parents didn't tell you they were leaving the country for a cruise would you be offended. I know I being sensitive but I can't help thinking its rude and sneaky. Yes I am an adult with my own DH and kids. We live in a different state then my parents but they never even mentioned it. They have come to stay with us for Easter and my oldest is upset because her school was off all last week and they did not come sooner to spend time with her. They arrived Friday 1pm and will leave Monday 7am. I though they couldn't get any more vacation no they are leaving Friday for Ft Lauderdale to take a cruise. My father let that slip to my DH yesterday. My parents have not told me at all.
I am miffed to say the least. I guess I'll just forget to mention when we go to Florida.

 

[DVC-Don]

Um, no I would not be upset at all.

 

[powellrj]

no, my parents have been on vacations before and we didn't know they were leaving until right up until they left and we live in the same town and talk every day!

I'm guessing is a private getaway that they don't want to share with anyone. Sometimes when DH and I want a little private time, we don't tell anyone, because you just don't want to share the moment yet.


While most of our getaways are local, there have been times when all the kids were gone and we just took off by ourselves without telling anyone just because we didn't want to have to share them moment with anyone. We have had a couple of getaways that nobody knows anything about because its just between us.

I should add that because we do have kids we have always been close and never been without cell phone contact, they just assume we are at home when they call!!!

 

[The Mystery Machine]

If they are normally secretive people then I suppose it would be par for the course.

If they thought you might get upset if they told you they were taking a cruise perhaps that might explain why they didn't mention it. They didn't want any grief from you guys.

Third, they didn't want to tell you because they thought you might suggest wanting to go with them and they wanted to be alone.

Or fourth you guys share everything and are very close. It would seem very odd to withhold that kind of info.

Either way...it all stinks!

 

[kdibattista]

Offended... no
Weird... yes

 

[HOGFAN]

Are they stretching themselves financially(putting it on credit cards) and were afraid of criticism?

Were they afraid you might want to go along? I know we are keeping our upcoing WDW trip a secret from certain family members so they dont invite themselves along.

 

[Tybug]

Um... no, I would not be offended.

 

[Allison]

Well, you seem to be upset they aren't spending more time with you so maybe that is why they didn't want to say anything. How would you have reacted if they told you? Were they avoiding that for some reason?

 

[Pop Daddy]

Offended... no
Weird... yes

 

[Hannathy]

My Mom used to do things like that and when I would say hey Mom it would have been nice to know you were going to ........ she would say oh didn't I say something and not in a coy way. I honestly think she thought she said something. Other times I would find out right before or if a short trip when they got back. I guess I don't understand the big deal? I didn't tell them everything I planned ahead of time either. Be glad they do things on their own. It would have been nice to know but I wouldn't be offended.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

Why didn't they say something? If it's because they wanted to take a cruise just the two of them and were concerned that other family members would want to go, also, I can perfectly understand. I do think it's a good idea to let family members know that a person is going ot be gone on a trip, though, just in case there is a family emergency.

 

[cccm]

luv2nascar - I understand completely. I would be hurt also. Any trip is an important one and the fact that they didn't share that they were going is odd.

They are leaving the country. I would want to know even if it was just for safety/security reasons.

If it were me I would just say "Hey I heard you were going away on a cruise." This would let them know you are on to them and miffed, but also give them a chance to say "Oh, didn't we tell you".

 

[dmslush]

Well, you seem to be upset they aren't spending more time with you so maybe that is why they didn't want to say anything. How would you have reacted if they told you? Were they avoiding that for some reason?

I agree, this may be what is going on. OP, you said in your post that your daughter was upset because she has been out of school, and your parents didn't come to spend more time with her.. then you say that you thought they couldn't get more vacation time. So, they probably didn't mention it because they knew that the grandchildren wouldn't understand why they were going on the cruise, and not using their vacation time to spend with them instead. They probably didn't tell just to keep from hurting anyone's feelings.

 

[disykat]

I would be very bothered because, despite the fact that we live in different states, we always let each other know when we are going to be away from contact. It would be me that would have to deal with family members not being able to get a hold of them etc. If an emergency came up and I was unable to contact them for days I would be seriously upset.

 

[grinningghost]

If MY parents went ANYWHERE I'd be thrilled. They never go anywhere and if not telling me would get them to go on a trip, I'm all for it.

But I can see why some people would be upset - especially if their parents had chronic health issues or something like that.

 

[jbmom]

Why didn't they say something? If it's because they wanted to take a cruise just the two of them and were concerned that other family members would want to go, also, I can perfectly understand. I do think it's a good idea to let family members know that a person is going ot be gone on a trip, though, just in case there is a family emergency.

I would let someone know just in case of an emergency.

 

[Pam]

What they said.

Were they just planning on sending you a postcard once they got there to let you know?

 

[luv2nascar]

They know I would not want to go - I have a fear of flying and have never flown. So me going was not going to happen - never been on a cruise. They have gone on a cruise for the last 5 year in a row and I asked my mother specifically when and where they were cruising this year months ago and got no answer so I thought they were not going.

It ticks me because my father almost died 1 year ago and spent time in ICU and had to be revived by EMT in ambulance. Their cell phone will not work on ship so no contact for 1 week.

 

[KristinBelle]

Nah, I wouldn't be offended at all.

 

[gris gris]

I wouldn't be offended, but my parents and I talk on a daily basis, and if they happened to not tell me they were going on a trip, I'd wonder why they didn't want to tell me that. We always talk about our vacations. We help each other with planning, buying tickets, etc....so it would just be out of character I guess.