Worst 50th Birthday and Fathers Day Gifts

[Nancyg56]

These were the only gifts. Dinner was a bust, as they tried a new recipe for something and it failed. The 17 y.o. didn't want to make a salad so she used wilted lettuce that should have been tossed.

I expressed my feelings about feeling slighted and now I am the bad guy.

Glad to hear that many of you are able to enjoy those days.

My DH almost never gets a gift for Father's Day. The kids give me little things for Mother's Day, but he gets a greeting. For a special occasion, I will sometimes try a new recipe, and many times, because I generally don't follow a recipe well, it is a bust. That does not negate the effort, though.

I wonder what else is going on. I find that when my DH is complaining about something that is a normal occurrence, and that I did not know bothered him. he is really upset about something else. are you upset about something not related to Father's Day and that is bleeding into the disappointing day?

 

[lizabu]

I can see why you were hurt. 50 is a milestone birthday and most people expect it to be extra special. My family is not very good at birthdays and holidays either. I've found I need to be very specific about how I want to celebrate it and if there's a gift I want I have to be very specific about what it is and where to buy it.

Next year is my 40th. I told DH I want to go to Disney World and take a Disney Cruise too (basically I said this is what we're doing and he was like ok)

 

[Arielle22]

DH and I have been married 28 years. A few years ago on an anniversary he got me a present but I didn't get him one. He was very upset.

My point to him was he never tells me what he wants and I don't know enough about his interests (tools and computers) to buy something without input. So now he emails me links of things he wants and is happy when he gets them.

He turns 50 in August so on our November Disney trip he will get a few laps in a luxury car as his present. He likes the idea.

He is great with presents and I have tried to step up my game the past few years.

OP, I suggest you make your desires crystal clear as to what you want for future birthdays or special events. It lets your family know your expectations so the chance of disappointment is less.

As for the 17 year old and the salad, I will impact some advice my SIL gave me years ago about teens, just try to get through these years without killing them. I have an 18 year old and I am still gritting my teeth and waiting for her to mature.

 

[Granny square]

Lol, teens have their 25 year old days and their 13 year old days I love dealing with teens though.

 

[BadgerGirl84]

OP, I'm sorry to hear that you are disappointed in your Father's Day and Birthday Gifts. I would be disappointed too, if that's what my family did for my birthday (they would never do that, so it would be very unlikely for me.)

However, you are coming across as pouting and lashing out at your family. I totally agree with making your feelings known, but it sounds like you have done more than that.

It also sounds like "quickie" presents and no party planned is the norm for your family. Had you thought about, in advance of your birthday, how you would feel if they would do what they seem to always do? I would imagine you did. If so, you should have spoken up prior to your birthday. Some people just are not good gift-givers and don't think of this stuff on your own. You could have put a list of reasonable gifts you'd like to get on the fridge and also recommended to your wife that you all reserve dinner out at your favorite restaurant or ask that your favorite dish be prepared at home.

I also don't think that your new decision to basically not get anyone in your family any more gifts ever is a wise one and will just create more hostility in your family.

 

[TheIncredibles!]

Sorry your birthday sucked but some people don't get anything for their birthday and spend it alone. How about being grateful for what you do have.

You know I never understand why people say ignorant crap like this. So nobody is allowed to EVER be upset or disappointed at anything that happens in their life because there's always somebody somewhere that has it worse?? Baloney.

Do you ever get disappointed, complain, cry, mourn, get mad etc about ANYTHING in your own? @@

OP - I'd be upset too. Sorry yo uwere disappointed.

 

[undertheradar]

This is how holidays are handled for me.

 

[lizabu]

You know I never understand why people say ignorant crap like this. So nobody is allowed to EVER be upset or disappointed at anything that happens in their life because there's always somebody somewhere that has it worse?? Baloney.

Do you ever get disappointed, complain, cry, mourn, get mad etc about ANYTHING in your own? @@

OP - I'd be upset too. Sorry yo uwere disappointed.

I agree. There is always someone starving or suffering in some other country. I guess that means no one else anywhere in the world can ever be disappointed about anything.

 

[marthachick]

OP, I would be hurt too. I turn 50 next year and I've already started planning my week at the beach to celebrate! I'm sure I won't have any trouble getting family to help me celebrate!

 

[phorsenuf]

You know I never understand why people say ignorant crap like this. So nobody is allowed to EVER be upset or disappointed at anything that happens in their life because there's always somebody somewhere that has it worse?? Baloney.

Do you ever get disappointed, complain, cry, mourn, get mad etc about ANYTHING in your own? @@

OP - I'd be upset too. Sorry yo uwere disappointed.

I know, I so hate that argument.