Women calls cops on shoplifting 6 year old.

[dislaney]

I don't think I could have ever done that to my 6 year old but I do think she will never forget it and probably won't shoplift again.

 

[Sorsha]

I think, at that age, little ones still need to see the police as being their friends. They need to feel comfortable approaching a police officer if they need help.

A 6 yr old would be scared to death in this situation. The big, bad police officer has taken her away from her parent, and transported her to jail. All alone, scared, helpless.

I would imagine being scared to death every time she sees a police officer is what will "stick with" someone this young,not so much "stealing is wrong". Definitely NOT what I would want to teach my DDs at that age.

Marching her back into the store, asking to speak to a manager, and making her return the item and apologize would have been sufficient, IMHO.

 

[Carly_Roach]

I think it's commendable what this mother did. I like the no nonsense approach. This lesson will stick with the little girl. She just taught her daughter how serious her actions were. Better this happened when she was six, rather than sixteen.

I have to agree. This may have been a needed lesson.

We have no idea what that woman's experience with her daughter was (has she stolen before? Has this happened in the family and her daughter was continuing the behavior?), therefore we have no knowledge upon which to base an educated decision on whether or not what the mother did was extreme.

Based on the fact that the store and the police cooperated with the information given to them at the time, I'm deciding that whatever happened between these four parties was correct. Why the heck this even made the newspapers is beyond me. Human interest story I guess.

Edited to add:

Never mind. Faux News. 'Nuff said.

 

[Skywalker]

At 6 years old the child should have known she was stealing. Maybe if she was 2 or 3 I'd say it would need to explained to her that stealing is wrong. By age 6 we have all been out enough to know how the process of buying something works.

I would not have done what the mom did but I don't think she's crazy for doing it. She's got a tough, no nonsense parenting style I guess. Not a thing wrong with that!

 

[cheermom1]

I would think the embarrassment of them having to take the item back to the store and apologize would make a big enough impression. That, maybe coupled with a 'next time it will be the police' should do the trick.

That is what I said but alas I was flamed for it..

 

[PaulaSue]

Hmmm, I don't know. I bet she'll never steal again.

Ditto!

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

I could see how some would have the opinion that the mother over reacted. However, the opinion that the mother was just "passing the buck" is completely absurd.

Thats right your opinion, not mine. I think calling the police is completely absurd. To me passing the buck is not wanting to take care of the situation yourself so you pass it to someone else. IMOP, thats what the mom did. She didn't want to repimand the kid herself and take the responsibility of teaching the kid a lesson so she calls the cops on a 6 yo. Let the cop do the dirty work.

I have a 6 yo. My 6 yo knows there is jail. She can't comprehend yet how bad it is and what kind of people go there. Her little mind hasn't seen that much "bad " in this world to put it all in perspective. So for a cop to take her away and say, you are going to jail. I would feel it would make her more scared of the policeman in general than jail, since as I said she doesn't even know how bad of a place jail is.

And as a PP stated, I want my 6 yo to like the police at this point in her life and always for that matter, not make her scared to death to go near one.

 

[mjkacmom]

I have a problem with the fact that this incident took the officer away from other situations where he might've been needed. I have 2 six year olds, and having them return the items with an apology would be all that was needed. Six year olds are still learning right from wrong. Now if this happened to be a 13 year old, I have no problem calling the police - a 13 year old certainly knows that stealing is wrong, and is perfectly capable of controlling the impulse to take something he or she wants.

 

[Wall-E1]

Thats right your opinion, not mine. I think calling the police is completely absurd. To me passing the buck is not wanting to take care of the situation yourself so you pass it to someone else. IMOP, thats what the mom did. She didn't want to repimand the kid herself and take the responsibility of teaching the kid a lesson so she calls the cops on a 6 yo. Let the cop do the dirty work.

I have a 6 yo. My 6 yo knows there is jail. She can't comprehend yet how bad it is and what kind of people go there. Her little mind hasn't seen that much "bad " in this world to put it all in perspective. So for a cop to take her away and say, you are going to jail. I would feel it would make her more scared of the policeman in general than jail, since as I said she doesn't even know how bad of a place jail is.

And as a PP stated, I want my 6 yo to like the police at this point in her life and always for that matter, not make her scared to death to go near one.

The problem is that some people don't understand what "passing the buck" is. "Passing the buck" is when you evade responsibility by passing it on to someone else. You probably mistakenly feel that the mother didn't want to deal with it and just thought, "Ah heck, I don't feel like dealing with this. I'll just call the cops". This is completely absurd. The mother did not take this action out of laziness. The mother was dealing with the situation in a very brave and honorable way. She took responsibility for her daughter's actions and responded by teaching her a lesson. Having the police come was her way of driving home her point about stealing. This would be called "taking the bull by the horns".

Too many parents these days have become experts at making excuses for their children and "passing the buck". These same parents sometimes accuse other parents that are actually parenting of "passing the buck". In fact, they are the ones who are "passing the buck". This is called "projecting". Also, speaking of excuses... making the excuse that calling the police will cause the child to be "scared to death to go near one" is another absurd excuse. Police are well trained in how to deal with all sorts of situations. They are not going to traumatize a six year old for life. These excuses are just "passing the buck"...in my opinion.

 

[Minnesota!]

I think it's commendable what this mother did. I like the no nonsense approach. This lesson will stick with the little girl. She just taught her daughter how serious her actions were. Better this happened when she was six, rather than sixteen.

Ditto!

I might have done the same. I know I would have marched my son back there ASAP and had him return the item and apologize to the manager. It's what my mom did to me when I stole a handful of Walnuts (the ones you have to crack) when I was about 4 or 5. She discovered them in my little purse and marched me back in there.

 

[hichewlova]

That woman is out of control - she spend her time doing something more useful!

 

[ChrizJen]

The problem is that some people don't understand what "passing the buck" is. "Passing the buck" is when you evade responsibility by passing it on to someone else. You probably mistakenly feel that the mother didn't want to deal with it and just thought, "Ah heck, I don't feel like dealing with this. I'll just call the cops". This is completely absurd. The mother did not take this action out of laziness. The mother was dealing with the situation in a very brave and honorable way. She took responsibility for her daughter's actions and responded by teaching her a lesson. Having the police come was her way of driving home her point about stealing. This would be called "taking the bull by the horns".

Too many parents these days have become experts at making excuses for their children and "passing the buck". These same parents sometimes accuse other parents that are actually parenting of "passing the buck". In fact, they are the ones who are "passing the buck". This is called "projecting". Also, speaking of excuses... making the excuse that calling the police will cause the child to be "scared to death to go near one" is another absurd excuse. Police are well trained in how to deal with all sorts of situations. They are not going to traumatize a six year old for life. These excuses are just "passing the buck"...in my opinion.

I agree with this. As much as I hate to say it, I think that the mother did the right thing. You can talk all you want about what you would have done if it had been your child. But don't try to pretend that every child is the same and should be disciplined the same way. I stole a piece of Brach's candy when I was 5. By the time I got it home, I was so beside myself with shame that I couldn't even look my mom in the eye. She knew that the guilt and shame that I felt were punishment enough. My brother, however, was always that kid who required a more "in your face" type of discipline. He didn't seem to come "pre-programmed" with a solid sense of right and wrong. I could totally see my mom doing something like this to teach my brother a lesson.
I'd honestly rather a mom teach a child the real life consequences of her actions than to take her home and beat the crap out of her.

 

[Wall-E1]

I agree with this. As much as I hate to say it, I think that the mother did the right thing. You can talk all you want about what you would have done if it had been your child. But don't try to pretend that every child is the same and should be disciplined the same way. I stole a piece of Brach's candy when I was 5. By the time I got it home, I was so beside myself with shame that I couldn't even look my mom in the eye. She knew that the guilt and shame that I felt were punishment enough. My brother, however, was always that kid who required a more "in your face" type of discipline. He didn't seem to come "pre-programmed" with a solid sense of right and wrong. I could totally see my mom doing something like this to teach my brother a lesson.
I'd honestly rather a mom teach a child the real life consequences of her actions than to take her home and beat the crap out of her.

Good point. A parents, we must decide what action or punishment is appropriate for our child. That said, not knowing this mother or child, I would have to give her the benefit of the doubt and trust that she felt her course of action was best for her daughter in that situation. I commend her for that. It was probably embarrassing and uncomfortable to do what she did. It most certainly was not "passing the buck". I also agree with you that showing real life consequences are much more effective than grounding or punishing the child.

 

[jrmasm]

Unless the child is a habitual shoplifter, I think the mother is a nutter.

 

[Wall-E1]

Unless the child is a habitual shoplifter, I think the mother is a nutter.

A fluffer nutter or a nutter butter?

 

[jrmasm]

A fluffer nutter or a nutter butter?

Neither. Those are both good.

 

[Acklander]

i think, at that age, little ones still need to see the police as being their friends. They need to feel comfortable approaching a police officer if they need help.

A 6 yr old would be scared to death in this situation. The big, bad police officer has taken her away from her parent, and transported her to jail. All alone, scared, helpless.

I would imagine being scared to death every time she sees a police officer is what will "stick with" someone this young,not so much "stealing is wrong". Definitely not what i would want to teach my dds at that age.

Marching her back into the store, asking to speak to a manager, and making her return the item and apologize would have been sufficient, imho.

mte

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

The problem is that some people don't understand what "passing the buck" is. "Passing the buck" is when you evade responsibility by passing it on to someone else. You probably mistakenly feel that the mother didn't want to deal with it and just thought, "Ah heck, I don't feel like dealing with this. I'll just call the cops". This is completely absurd. The mother did not take this action out of laziness. The mother was dealing with the situation in a very brave and honorable way. She took responsibility for her daughter's actions and responded by teaching her a lesson. Having the police come was her way of driving home her point about stealing. This would be called "taking the bull by the horns".

Too many parents these days have become experts at making excuses for their children and "passing the buck". These same parents sometimes accuse other parents that are actually parenting of "passing the buck". In fact, they are the ones who are "passing the buck". This is called "projecting". Also, speaking of excuses... making the excuse that calling the police will cause the child to be "scared to death to go near one" is another absurd excuse. Police are well trained in how to deal with all sorts of situations. They are not going to traumatize a six year old for life. These excuses are just "passing the buck"...in my opinion.

Why do you feel like you have to patronize ? I'm well aware of what Passing the buck and projecting means and I don't need a lesson to explain it to me..

You take it as you want, I take it as I want. People define it differently. LIKE I SAID PREVIOUSLY, I felt she passed the buck because she didn't want to face punishment for her own child and passed it on for the cop to do it. She evaded responsibility by not disciplining her own child and called the cops to do it. Plus again IMOP, a policeman could be as gentle as they want. If you put a kid in a policecar and threaten to put them in jail if they steal again, the kid will be scared of that person. I'm speaking of my 6 yo, because I know she would. Thats how I see it. But of course in your eyes thats wrong, because according to your definitions what I say is completely absurd and your opinions are gospel.

Take it as you want. I don't care if you want to call the cops on your 6 yo. I think its completely absurd and ridiculous and unless the kid has done this repeatedly (we don't know that) then I feel she was overreacting. I would have never done this with my 6 yo. I would have took her back in the store, have her returned the item and punished her when we got home.

And again IMOP, this is not passing the buck or projecting. Its called being responsible for your kid and parenting.

 

[mjkacmom]

Ditto!

I might have done the same. I know I would have marched my son back there ASAP and had him return the item and apologize to the manager. It's what my mom did to me when I stole a handful of Walnuts (the ones you have to crack) when I was about 4 or 5. She discovered them in my little purse and marched me back in there.

Have you stolen since? Was this effective? Did you turn to a life of crime because your mom chose not to call the cops on you? Your mom did the right thing, IMHO.

 

[Wall-E1]

She evaded responsibility by not disciplining her own child and called the cops to do it.

The act of calling the police doesn't support your statement of evading responsibility. This shows that she was taking full responsibility for her daughter's actions and was taking full responsibility by calling the proper authorities. She was proactively disciplining her child by calling the police, in order to show her daughter the possible consequences of her negative behavior. This is not evading responsibility. This is proper parenting. Calling the police was the way in which this mother disciplined her child.

The problem here is this bizarre notion that by taking action in response to her daughter's behavior, this mother was evading responsibility?!?!? It makes no sense.