Wish me luck -updated..sort of resolved

[klacey1]

OP, I am FLABBERGASTED! What a sorry, pathetic excuse for a teacher. A) Inviting all of your students to your wedding is just...weird, firstly. And B) To UNINVITE your son because SHE messed up and SHE'S a terrible teacher??? I just LOVE, too, that she had to have the principal call you-- she couldn't even come herself?? I also don't understand why she was told not to come to the meeting-- if there was a teacher/parent/student conflict, and she is one of the VERY involved parties (the one causing the trouble), of course she should be there!
It sounds like she is young and inexperienced. I also don't get the principal's theory that you writing an email was "coming on strong." Something happened, you reached out to the proper people. You could have done something so worse-- you did exactly the right thing. OP, I really hope this situation works out in the end. I would DEFINITELY see about getting your son switched to another class.

 

[tiggger1]

I am so sorry!! We just had my son's IEP meeting and while it didnt go as planned it was ok! I hope it all works out!

 

[kirstenb1]

That teacher blew it big time, and she's fully aware of it. That's why she's too cowardly to communicate with you at all. I wish you could give HER an IEP to help her learn how to teach!!

 

[The Mystery Machine]

How awful.

 

[LBAK]

Wow I think the principal is dropping the ball on this. I went through a similar experience with my DD. Her IEP was totally ignored and the teacher told me there was nothing wrong and she's manipulating everyone. That one year made her self esteem nose dive. My DH and I got a lawyer, he made one call to the school and they couldn't do enough for us for the rest of her schooling. Make sure you keep fighting for you son.
My DD is now 24 and doing great. She is in college going at a much slower rate, she works full time and she's gone back to inform the teacher just how well she's doing.

 

[eduk8r26]

How can a principal tell the teacher she shouldn't come to the IEP? In our district/county/state the classroom teacher is one of the required members of the meeting. They can be excused, but better have a darn good reason and paperwork has to be filled out ahead of time and the parents must give their consent.

 

[MushyMushy]

My jaw just dropped reading your update! I mean, I was ready to cut the teacher some slack for one mistake, but everything following this is just WRONG, WRONG, WRONG. I am so upset on your behalf.

The principal sounds like he's completely worthless. I know it's almost the end of the school year, but I think I would be taking this to much higher levels. I've been attending IEP meetings for more than 13 years and let me tell you what, if you request that a teacher be there, then that teacher HAS to be there. I'm not sure where you live, but here it would be a serious violation.

 

[tw1nsmom]

There are so many serious violations that it's making my head spin! The only way the meeting continued at all was that it was labeled a subcommittee meeting and all other topics pertaining to people not present were tabled.

I'm already in line for an impartial hearing to determine if the district will to pay for an Independent Educational Evaluation. I can't even begin to count the ways they've violated mine and my child's rights. Trust me, I'm not going to give up on this. This is the kind of district that depends on parents not knowing their rights or being too afraid to do something about it. That isn't the case with me. Sometimes all of this just makes me feel defeated and tire though. They just try to wear you down. Thanks for listening.

 

[tw1nsmom]

New update:

The principal just called and apologized. She said she misspoke when she said that the teacher didn't want DS to come to her wedding. The teacher just didn't want me to come to her wedding.

Ok...I again reassured her that I had no intention of going but I felt the whole thing was handled in an entirely unprofessional manner and, frankly, the teacher needs to grow up.

DS is being switched to a different math section for the remainder of the year. I told her if the teacher couldn't get over it enough to speak to me so that we could discuss DS's academic needs then he would need a different teacher.

I'll put a pin in this for now, but I have a feeling all of this will end up being brought up during the impartial hearing process.

I did tell the principal that all bets are off if DS finds out that even I was uninvited. He's been told that we aren't going because we're busy that weekend. I also let her know that I expect the school to handle the math move smoothly. I told her that in order to prevent him from thinking he did anything wrong I told him that the switch had nothing to do with him. That sometimes grown-ups just can't get along and that his daddy doesn't like the teacher and doesn't want him in her class.Well, I didn't exactly lie, and he walked away completely fine with it.

 

[*BTMRR*]

New update:

The principal just called and apologized. She said she misspoke when she said that the teacher didn't want DS to come to her wedding. The teacher just didn't want me to come to her wedding.

Ok...I again reassured her that I had no intention of going but I felt the whole thing was handled in an entirely unprofessional manner and, frankly, the teacher needs to grow up.

DS is being switched to a different math section for the remainder of the year. I told her if the teacher couldn't get over it enough to speak to me so that we could discuss DS's academic needs then he would need a different teacher.

I'll put a pin in this for now, but I have a feeling all of this will end up being brought up during the impartial hearing process.

I did tell the principal that all bets are off if DS finds out that even I was uninvited. He's been told that we aren't going because we're busy that weekend. I also let her know that I expect the school to handle the math move smoothly. I told her that in order to prevent him from thinking he did anything wrong I told him that the switch had nothing to do with him. That sometimes grown-ups just can't get along and that his daddy doesn't like the teacher and doesn't want him in her class.Well, I didn't exactly lie, and he walked away completely fine with it.

The wedding thing is just insane...it's completely unprofessional, not to mention who wants a whole class of 10-year-olds at their wedding anyhow? Even if they come without their parents That's just weird. And to invite/UNinvite people through the PRINCIPAL? The principal should not be getting involved in his staff's wedding invitations. I'm as mad at him as at the teacher.
I know you know all this but it just made me so mad for your son (and for you) that I had to type it out.

I'm glad you have a temporary fix. I hope next year will be much better for your sweet son.

 

[wickey's friend]

I am just speechless. What that teacher and principal are doing to your son is unconscionable. I have issues with the way my son's teachers provide him his education, but this is just amazing. I know you'll continue to be an advocate for him, and if they think it is you "coming on strong," well that's just too darn bad for them.

 

[2girlsmom]

OP, I wish you luck and applaud you for standing up for your child, it is such a hard thing, as there seem to be a few teachers/administrators in every district that want to fight us on doing what they ARE REQUIRED to do! I fight this battle this year too with a teacher that told me to my face that my ADHD child is just lazy and we let her get away with it! Needless to say that didn't stand, but I have to continue to call and email with reminders to meet the accomodations in her plan, otherwise they "forget".