Why men cheat!

[rie'smom]

From the Oprah website:

"What's the number one reason men cheat? Ninety-two percent of men said it wasn't primarily about the sex. "The majority said it was an emotional disconnection, specifically a sense of feeling underappreciated. A lack of thoughtful gestures," Gary says. "Men are very emotional beings. They just don't look like that. Or they don't seem like that. Or they don't tell you that."

Maybe the men should give their spouses the same attention they will lavish on their new object of desire. If they did, chances are their wives would respond favorably. Gary Neuman is an idiot. Pretty soon on Oprah, we'll see guests throwing chairs at each other.

 

[Biscuitsmom31]

My guess is that it's different things for different people. Several years ago, I had a bit of an itch I guess you could call it. For me, it was that I was raised in a strict religion and had not dated much before getting married, and had no physical experience with anyone but my husband. I started to wonder what I had missed by being such a goodie-two-shoes.

Thankfully, I controlled myself and nothing came of it. The itch was not worth my marriage and the stability of my children't lives. I was working with a bunch of single people that partied, drank and did all the things I never did when I was single. Getting a different job and getting away from that influence made a huge difference. The itch passed and I hope it never returns.

 

[JimmyPicker]

Why do men cheat? Weakness, stupidity, lack of integrity or morals or honesty or decency. I'm not really sure. I'm just going off my thoughts of the one time I strayed, "making out" with a former girlfriend at a time when I had a girlfriend. And I felt guilty about it...and had a good friend who made sure I didn't pursue it and do something I would regret even more...and I confessed it and was forgiven by the girlfriend (who eventually went on to become my lying, cheating, thieving ex-wife...heh...ironic?)

But what drives men to cheat? The thrills. The thrill of the chase. The thrill of the conquest. The thrill of getting away with it. Not one cheater I've ever known talked about emotions or any of that other garbage. It wasn't even about simply being with some woman. It was about being with a different woman, or several different women, or an endless string of different women. And if they could tack on getting away with something, it was even better.

As far as I'm concerned, the rest is bull. The other problems may exist, and would even be a reason to end a relationship if things were bad enough. But for cheating, they're nothing more than an excuse.

WOW my sis and bil and I were just talking about this and this was exactly what we said it IS the thrill plain and simple!!!!

Well, ladies, there we have it. As long as we give our husbands the thrills they're craving, we'll be fine.

And after our adults-only weekend the past couple of days, I have to admit, no one was able to hold my husbands attention quite the way I could.

Give them the thrill, and they won't even notice the chick with the clear heels.

 

[spaceykiddette]

From the Oprah website:

"What's the number one reason men cheat? Ninety-two percent of men said it wasn't primarily about the sex. "The majority said it was an emotional disconnection, specifically a sense of feeling underappreciated. A lack of thoughtful gestures," Gary says. "Men are very emotional beings. They just don't look like that. Or they don't seem like that. Or they don't tell you that."

So, in other words, men cheat for the same reasons women cheat. It is just easier for women to say that men cheat for superficial reasons.

 

[Hollywoodhaha]

Well, from a young persons point of view , in high school the idiots
cheat because they can show off to their friends.
I don't get how that is good impressing friends .. but, hey, I'm not a guy.

 

[Camicar]

Most of the men I know who have cheated have done so not for any deep emotional reason. They have cheated because (and in their own words):
1. I was horny and my wife wasn't there and I'm entitled to/have to get off whenever I'm horny bec that's just the way men are, honey.
2. It was just sex, not emotional, so it doesn't count.
3. It was a quickie, so it doesn't count.
4. I didn't get fully undressed, so it doesn't count.
5. We were at a bacherlor party and they hired hookers and I'd look like a fool if I didn't use one.
6. My wife wouldn't do xyz that I learned about on the internet, so I HAD to seek out another woman to fulfill my needs.

I think the most shocking stories I heard were from a relative I"ll call Bill, about his one-time friends. Small town boys, goodie goodie kids, brought up strict Catholics, only dated one or two girls before getting married, have 2 kids, good jobs... and whenever they'd have a bachelor party they'd hire the town hooker to service the entire party or if the host didn't have enough money, they'd do a raffle for her services. Yes, the town hooker who looked like she was 70 years old with no teeth (and I won't tell you why no teeth was a good thing.) Bill said he actually could not comprehend how any man got himself...ready to take advantage of her services and left in total disgust, wondering who these guys really were.

When that hooker got 'too old' she brought along her granddaughter, who Bill said looked all of 13 and even that didn't stop these guys from using her. Bill said he turned to one of the guys and said, "HEY. Isn't your DAUGHTER the same age?" GUy said he could care less, free was free, and undid his belt buckle. Bill swore he never used the hooker and would leave before the public sex would start. Yes, public sex. These guys would rent a back room at a local bar with a pool table and have sex with the hooker on the pool table, while all the guys waited their turn. Yup, good Catholic boys who went home to their good Catholic wife and their good Catholic kids and went to mass the next day.

BIll stopped going to these parties because he said he found them disgusting (although it took him quite a few parties to come to that decision.) And no one, including my relative, ever called the cops when this hooker brought in a very young-lookin girl. Oh, and did I mention that no condoms were ever used?

After hearing that story and having it confirmed by another guy (see #5 above) who attended the parties, I really wonder just how we are bringing up our sons that they have no compunction about behaving in ways that are illegal, immoral, and unhealthy.