Why Are So Many Women Getting Breast Cancer??...I'm CONSUMED with fear

[MinnieTink]

I am not the OP. However I did post earlier that I am having major anxiety over my moms current BC situation. That hour at the radiololgy center (where I have worked got years) has changed so much...I'm very scared, have A LOT of anxiety and there are still so many questions to be answered. This thread has been a comfort to me...again I'm not the OP, but still. I do find comfort in BC survivors stories and your toughness inspires me. Those of you who ride the anxiety bus as I do--I appreciate your stories as well! I think we all try to help in our own ways so please let's all just get along.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Appreciation? What does that mean? You know the definitions?


And I feel the same way. Just subsitute people suffering from panic disorders for cancer survivors and I could write the exact same sentence right back to you. I shared a very difficult situation that I am still having major issues coping with in order to help the OP.



Well your post will sure as hell make me think twice about helping someone who may be suffering from a major depressive episode.



Ok, so now I am being blamed for people not posting their support. I think you are giving me a little more influence on this board than I actually have.



And finally, the typical nasty tactic in an attempt to discredit who you don't agree with...putting words in their mouth.
Please show me "scary stories" in any post I have written, because I can't find it. This poor woman came to the board asking for help in easing her fears. And that is what I have addressed. The fear. Just because my advice doesn't line up with yours, doesn't mean that my information cant be valuble to her. You act as if I came on here intending to make the OP and all the breast cancer survivors miserable.
That's the problem with people, I think. They say they have an appreciation for something, when really they don't know how it feels, how it appears, how it can be helped. Mental illness and disorders are dangerous and sometimes need immediate attention. It can be just as debilitating and life threatening as "real" illnesses. But you obviously underestimate it's seriousness. And many people do, you aren't alone. I wish people were more understanding.
Now I'm a little . You may prevent the OP from seeking the help she may need to get through this. The stigma of being diagnosed with a mental issue still exists, unfortunately. I have witnessed it in person, and now on a message board.
I came on here with really good intentions. And if you read one of my earlier posts, I am having pretty severe issues myself. I put myself out on a limb to help someone, only to be insulted and stressed by the passive agressive tone of your reply. If the OP posts that my information was helpful or even if she says that my situation doesn't apply to her, that's actually the only opinion I am concered with. I didn't come on here to fight with anyone. I should have known better. No good deed goes unpunished.

I appreciate your thoughts. I am not going to argue any further.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

This thread has been a comfort to me...again I'm not the OP, but still. I do find comfort in BC survivors stories and your toughness inspires me.

Thank you for posting.

 

[devotedchristian]

OP here, I just wanted to say thank you to everyone on this board. I just had a chance to read through the responses on this thread and I DID find it helpful.

Unfortunately I did not have this thread to get me through the weekend and I let my fears run amok and affected me Saturday/ Sunday and this morning.
I couldn't get out of bed and when I did, I went to the mirror to look at my breast and kept saying "what's that spot" "is it raised" I even pulled DH into the bedroom and asked if he saw anything abnormal about my breast.

He told me to "stop worrying, you do not have breast cancer!" We were going out for our weekly date night and I could barely eat dinner at the restaurant.

I know, I need help.


A PP mentioned GAD, those symptoms describe me so I am going to make an appointment to get help.

Someone mentioned how GAD make you take your fears to another level...I've done that. I was thinking about DH and I helping SD(17) transition to college in the fall and my birthday is coming up in July (I will be 37) and I can start reasearching private school for DS (6).

But then I started thinking to myself, "but how I will do all of those things if I am facing chemo? radiation?" And then I have to literraly give myself a mental shake and tell me to stop thinking like this!

And then I say to myself "what if my mammogram results come back and I am only in Stage 1, well, I can survive right? I can be cancer free right?

When my mother died I joined breastcancer.org for support. Unfortunately, that board does not help, so I don't read anymore.

But this morning reading through this thread helped and in order to keep me from having a panic attack, this thread will help get me through my mammogram next week and through the 30 day "waiting period" of waiting to hearing the results.

While I already know I will continue to have my fears, I have this thread and the quoted scriptures as ongoing comfort.

I'm at work now and I after reading through this thread I am going to make a conscious effort to think POSITIVE and not give myself a death sentence.

I am going to think POSITIVE and declare that my mammogram will be Normal and I will be fine.

Thank you to everyone on this board. Thank you very much.

 

[Rock it Dog]

I am going to think POSITIVE and declare that my mammogram will be Normal and I will be fine.

There ya go! We're so glad to hear you found support and comfort here, OP. Remember, whether it's GAD, BC or anything else for that matter, we're never in the fight alone. We're all on this journey together and we're all so glad you found solace here. Remember also, to stand on Isaiah 53:4-5. Matthew 6:25-34, not to mention II Corinthians 10:3-6. Good verses for anxious thoughts. The Corinth. verse got THIS GAD/BC survivor through a lot of my rockier anxiety ridden times. ...and yes, reading threads like this when you deal with anxiety issues can indeed be difficult and even breed worries. I have a son with debilitating GAD, and every new subject in his life can bring on a whole new episode and catalog of concerns. I can't speak for anyone else, but I've found in our case, attacking the anxiety head on with real facts and information is what ultimately leads to peace on the subject. In bc's case, the facts are it's out there. That's already established. BUT... women are beating it right and left and knowing that can put a lot of minds at ease. Not the case in every situation I realize, but we all did out best to help in whatever way we knew how.

 

[Planogirl]

devotedchristian, it's good to read such a positive post from you and I'm glad that this thread helped a little. That is even in spite of the inevitable bickering. You hang in there.

 

[CaliforniaDreamin]

I appreciate your thoughts. I am not going to argue any further.

I apologize that it took a less than civil turn. I suppose I let my own experiences color my judgement. I also let anxiety about seeing my dr today spill over into my posts. I didn't mean to hurt anyone at all. I just felt SO sure, in my heart. I have never met the OP but I recognized my own anxiety in her post. I was just trying to throw her a life line, as the rest of the board was doing. I just had a different perspective. I do sincerely apologize for the rude manner in which I responded to you last night. I was sick all morning thinking about what you would be posting back. I ended up going to the ER (not because of the post) due to an anxiety attack that was so severe, I needed a shot. While I was lying there waiting, all I could think about was what I had written to you. I was scared to death to open this thread. But I didn't have the strength to not look. I avoid confrontation by nature. I'm not comfortable with it and I just knew that you were going to stoop to my level in your response. I thank you for not doing that, it allowed me a chance to let you know it's been on my mind all day and I regret it.

 

[CaliforniaDreamin]

OP here, I just wanted to say thank you to everyone on this board. I just had a chance to read through the responses on this thread and I DID find it helpful.

I know, I need help.


A PP mentioned GAD, those symptoms describe me so I am going to make an appointment to get help.

But this morning reading through this thread helped and in order to keep me from having a panic attack, this thread will help get me through my mammogram next week and through the 30 day "waiting period" of waiting to hearing the results.

While I already know I will continue to have my fears, I have this thread and the quoted scriptures as ongoing comfort.

I'm at work now and I after reading through this thread I am going to make a conscious effort to think POSITIVE and not give myself a death sentence.

I am going to think POSITIVE and declare that my mammogram will be Normal and I will be fine.

Thank you to everyone on this board. Thank you very much.

I wish you nothing but the best, I'm so glad you are going to see a dr. because there are medications that can really help ease the burden. You are going through so much and there is relief available. I have had times when I have had panic attacks and no medication on hand. It's horrible.
Positive thinking is great, but if you start to get anxious or think anything less than positive, DO NOT BEAT YOURSELF UP. I do this so much. I get mad at myself for not having the inner strength that I had intended to. But you and I are different people. You could absolutely be stronger than me. And I hope you are. Just don't beat yourself up if you cannot 100% of time time meet your goal to think positively. You are human. And you are going to feel how you feel. Even with anti-anxiety meds, you will still be worried. And you even mentioned that fact, so it's really good you are aware of it. But I promise, an anti anxiety med will allow you to function. When you mentioned being in bed all weekend, I cannot tell you how many weekends I have lost like this. I'll pray for you, and alot of people will be here to support you through this. I'm not going to post anymore on this thread, because I feel that you know what to do from here as far as feeling some relief. You have a great thread of people who are going to support you through this. If you have any questions about GAD, or meds, or anything at all, please feel free to PM me.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I apologize that it took a less than civil turn. I suppose I let my own experiences color my judgement. I also let anxiety about seeing my dr today spill over into my posts. I didn't mean to hurt anyone at all. I just felt SO sure, in my heart. I have never met the OP but I recognized my own anxiety in her post. I was just trying to throw her a life line, as the rest of the board was doing. I just had a different perspective. I do sincerely apologize for the rude manner in which I responded to you last night. I was sick all morning thinking about what you would be posting back. I ended up going to the ER (not because of the post) due to an anxiety attack that was so severe, I needed a shot. While I was lying there waiting, all I could think about was what I had written to you. I was scared to death to open this thread. But I didn't have the strength to not look. I avoid confrontation by nature. I'm not comfortable with it and I just knew that you were going to stoop to my level in your response. I thank you for not doing that, it allowed me a chance to let you know it's been on my mind all day and I regret it.

No need to apologize. I just wish I could see you in person to give you a big ole It's ok. I'm sorry you're dealing with such feelings yourself and hate thinking of you upset over anything said in this thread. I apologize to you that my words upset you. Breast cancer is a subject that's close to my heart, just as anxiety is for you. People get passionate about things that affect them personally, understandably. I'm glad that devotedchristian benefitted from all the posts. And I hope you find help as well. (If you are interested, I might have some other ideas for you as well.)

For anyone here who doesn't know, there's a breast cancer survivor's thread here that Laurabelle and I started back in 2005 just so we could talk about issues related to breast cancer and/or cancer in general and offer support to anyone in need of it when they or their loved ones are going through testing or treatment, etc. It's a place where we can kind of let it all hang out, so to speak (no pun intended ), so if anyone wants or needs to talk, we're always around.

 

[CaliforniaDreamin]

No need to apologize. I just wish I could see you in person to give you a big ole It's ok. I'm sorry you're dealing with such feelings yourself and hate thinking of you upset over anything said in this thread. I apologize to you that my words upset you. Breast cancer is a subject that's close to my heart, just as anxiety is for you. People get passionate about things that affect them personally, understandably. I'm glad that devotedchristian benefitted from all the posts. And I hope you find help as well. (If you are interested, I might have some other ideas for you as well.)

Ok, you are making me cry. lol
Thank you for being a bigger person and accepting my apology. I could use a big hug right about now! But you nailed it when you said people are passionate about things that affect them personally. I was determined to get my advice on this thread regardless of who disagreed. Sometimes I have tunnel vision. Again, I'm sorry. And I am absolutely open to any ideas you may have that might help me. I'm really drowning in depression and anxiety here. I was diagnosed with severe depression, GAD and post traumatic stress syndrome years ago. Meds had been keeping things in check until work began to get so stressful, my meds quit working. I don't know if I built up a tolerance by taking them so long, or if the situation was so stressful, I couldn't handle it. And to make matters worse, when your anti anxiety meds don't work, you can pretty much double your panic instantly. But as I said, I have been on benzos like xanax and klonipin for years...my body just doesn't benefit anymore. I just don't want the OP to read this and think that if she decides to get on an anti anxiety med, that it won't see her thru this. I'm so sure that she will benefit. I've had issues for so long...well, I am scared I am running out of options.
But reading your post makes me feel so much better. Thank you!

 

[DebbieB]

Are you sure you have to wait 30 days for the results? When I've gone for a screening mammogram (no symptoms), I got results within a week. If I had a symptom (I get alot of cysts), they have a radiologist right there with the results.

 

[MinnieTink]

I'm going to echo DebbieB and say that 30 days is an unusually long time. I have worked in a radiology facility for 13 years. Our turn around time is about 24 hours. Yeah, we are good but 30 days seems too much. I hope they don't really make you wait so long.

If it is your dr's office telling you it is 30 days then that's a different story I guess. The facility where I work was asked by a small number of drs to NOT tell their patients how fast the reports get to them. You do have the right to your report tho. You should be able to go sign out a copy of the report after a few days if you get any 'run-around.'

I wish you the best of luck!!!!!

 

[snappy]

Just wanted to add a link to the breast survivor's thread that Pea n me referred to above earlier.

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?p=36333488#post36333488

A great thread that I have been involved in since the first day. If you care to join us, you will be welcomed, whether you are a survivor or any type of cancer, have a family member or friend who is a survivor, awaiting testing, or
a supporter of any kind.

I also wanted to add my personal belief is that stress is a factor in lots of medical issues. I think it very important to seek help in dealing with it to avoid its effects.

Good luck to the OP and all who have posted here.