Who's got some jokes"

[Skelington Spade]

There might be a thread like this, but I don't care Just say some good clean jokes.

I'mma gonna start off.

What does Leann do in France?

Leann Rhymes!

 

[Lil_Tink]

Why did the chicken cross the road?



To get to the other side.

 

[frannikinz]

Why did the boy shuffle his cards?
To put them in a random order

 

[Pirate Me]

^Classics...nice.

Erm.....Why did the cow cross the road?
*To get to the other side.*

 

[valeriesunshine]

What did one snowman say to the other?

*Smells like carrots*

 

[TESTRACKLOVER92]

What did one snowman say to the other?

*Smells like carrots*

Thats cute.

How do you get a tissue to dance?
***You put a little boogie in it!

 

[rutgersdeb]

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

**Because it was dead.**

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree?

**Because it was stapled to the monkey.**

 

[Boomer1]

what did the polar bear say when he walked into an igloo?

OUCH!

 

[meeshheartsdisney217]

there once were two fishes and one ran into a wall and said "DAM".

 

[eeyore578]

there was this duck walked into a bar and said got any grapes no said this is bar tender well the duck said this every day for a week the bartender got tired of it so the next day the duck came in and said got any grapes the bartender said duck if u come back tommarrow and ask that ill nail u the this bar table the next day he came back and asked got any nails the bartender replied no this is a bar the duck said got and grapes and laught all the way home enjoy

 

[meeshheartsdisney217]

a man ran into a bar and said "ouch!"

 

[AngelInDisguise]

two boys were camping in the backyard. Late at night they started wondering what time it was. "Start singing really loudly," one of them said.
"How will that help?" asked the other boy.
"Just do it," insisted the first.
They both started singing really loudly. A few seconds later, a neighbor threw her window open and shouted, "keep it down! Don't you know it's 3 o'clock in the mornin'!!!?"


There was a man who was born on the 5th day of the 5th month of 1955, whose lucky number was always 5. On his birthday he went to the racetrack and was astounded to see that in the 5th race a horse called Pentagram was running, with the odds of 55 to 1. Rushing of to the bank, the man was overwhelmed to find he had $5,555.55 in his bank account. He withdrew the whole amount, ran back to the races and bet all of it on Pentagram to win. Pentagram, came in 5th.


A lady goes into a pet store to get a parrot that can talk. She buys a parrot, takes him home and brings him back the next day. The lady says, "this parrot is not talking yet."
"Lets see," says the clerk. "I know, you should get him a ladder for his cage. He will climb the ladder then talk!" The lady buys the ladder and comes back the next day.
"The parrot still isn't saying anything!"
The clerk replies, "how about a mirror? The bird will climb the ladder then see himself in the mirror!" The lady buys the mirror, and comes back the next day.
"I have almost had it!" says the lady, "his parrot will not talk to me!"
The clerk think then says, "Try this bell! The parrot with climb the ladder, look in the mirror and ring the bell then he will talk to you!"
I'll give it a try," says the lady. She comes back to the store the next day.
"Whats wrong?" asks the clerk.
"My parrot died," the lady said.
"I'm so sorry for that!!!," says the clerk.
"The parrot said one thing before he died though."
"What did he say?" says the clerk.
"He said, Doesn't that store carry any food?"

 

[Skelington Spade]

A lady goes into a pet store to get a parrot that can talk. She buys a parrot, takes him home and brings him back the next day. The lady says, "this parrot is not talking yet."
"Lets see," says the clerk. "I know, you should get him a ladder for his cage. He will climb the ladder then talk!" The lady buys the ladder and comes back the next day.
"The parrot still isn't saying anything!"
The clerk replies, "how about a mirror? The bird will climb the ladder then see himself in the mirror!" The lady buys the mirror, and comes back the next day.
"I have almost had it!" says the lady, "his parrot will not talk to me!"
The clerk think then says, "Try this bell! The parrot with climb the ladder, look in the mirror and ring the bell then he will talk to you!"
I'll give it a try," says the lady. She comes back to the store the next day.
"Whats wrong?" asks the clerk.
"My parrot died," the lady said.
"I'm so sorry for that!!!," says the clerk.
"The parrot said one thing before he died though."
"What did he say?" says the clerk.
"He said, Doesn't that store carry any food

Haha, I heard that one the other day lowl!

 

[CheezDoodle]

Knock Knock
Who's There?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting co-
MOO!