Where can someone breast feed there child?

[minkydog]

Wow! 9 pages! Is that a record for a troll?

 

[Tinkmom]

I also have never seen anything like this either. Nor have I seen any breastfeeding mom show more skin than she would in a bikini top at the beach......I too, don't disbelieve anyone who says they've seen this, but how often do you really see it? Fred describes one situation, then adds that he's seen it "a couple of other times". ......I betcha you come into reasonably close proximately to a breastfeeding mom on average at least once a week. ......620 or so of which you barely noticed, 3 or 4 of which were acting as exhibitionists.

These same behaviors get brought up every time there is a breastfeeding thread. People never notice most of the 500-1,000 or more women who breastfed discreetly, they only notice and remember those 2 or 3 or even 10 women who let it all hang out. This type of concentration on the actions of such a tiny percentage of any other group of people would be shot down immediately as unfair stereotyping or prejudice.

You make some amazing assumptions, both about the number of women I have encountered nursing, and how, apparently, I am wrong to think that the 3 or so women I have seen who are exhibiting much more than they need to are acting inappropriately. I am not holding a few's misbehavior against every nursing mother, sheesh! And if you have never seen a nursing mother exposed her breast AT ALL then great and wonderful; I don't see how anyone could have a problem with that. I am merely noting that mothers who decide it is okay to show it all are not helping to make public nursing more accepted.

I was perfectly civil and stating a reasonable comment in response to another's comment that every time a nursing mother is seen out that it helps other nursing moms. There are several posters who seemed intent on saying that they will nurse whenever and wherever and however they wish, crowds or modesty be damned. I am simply of the belief that this attitude can be taken too far, both by making turning public opinion against nursing in public and, much more importantly, by exposing infants to a sensory overload, which, according to every pediatric and lactation information I have been exposed to, says is not conducive to their development.

And mothers whose babies never looked at them while nursing? They have missed an amazing thing. My Lord, that has to be the most beautiful interaction in the entire world: a mom sweet talking, cuddling and nursing her baby, who stops periodically to smile and coo back at mama. Popping a nipple in their mouth and going on with whatever isn't quite the same.

I am entitled to my opinion, just as others who find events such as giving birth, breastfeeding and even sexual intercourse quite beautiful, but really don't care to see every gritty detail of other people doing these things. A little tolerance of others goes a long way, and that isn't a one way (everyone should agree with ME and let me do what I think best) street.

 

[GEM]

Tinkmom, are you FredS? Cause I'm really confused right now.

. . . much more importantly, by exposing infants to a sensory overload, which, according to every pediatric and lactation information I have been exposed to, says is not conducive to their development.

So, am I correct in assuming you also worry about bottle fed babies being fed in malls, theme parks, etc. - which I still see WAY more often than breastfed babies? After all, the impact on their development would be the same, wouldn't it? Or is is somehow only breastfed babies that are susceptible to sensory overload and therefore should be fed in quiet, isolated places for their own protection?

A little tolerance of others goes a long way, and that isn't a one way (everyone should agree with ME and let me do what I think best) street.

Tolerence is a lovely idea, but, in all honesty, I think we would all agree that there are some things that shouldn't be tolerated - and making mothers feel like criminals or perverts for nursing their babies in public is definately one of those things in my book. Sorry, but I refuse to tolerate that. It doesn't deserve to be tolerated, and the law backs up my opinion on that.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

by exposing infants to a sensory overload, which, according to every pediatric and lactation information I have been exposed to, says is not conducive to their development.

And mothers whose babies never looked at them while nursing? They have missed an amazing thing. My Lord, that has to be the most beautiful interaction in the entire world: a mom sweet talking, cuddling and nursing her baby, who stops periodically to smile and coo back at mama. Popping a nipple in their mouth and going on with whatever isn't quite the same.

Wow you know sooo much about babies. It is excellent that you are breast feeding supporter. Heaven forbid those bottle feeding mamas get the benefit of your "polite" lashing.

My LORD--so knowledgable yet so *not* when it comes to BF and babies.

Maybe we should ban feeding *ALL* children in public. It can't be good for any of them with all that sensory overload.

I'm sorry baby--no cracker for you. Sensory overload you know. We must get you to solitary confinement immediately.

Very funny how some people with opinions have all these *sightings* of flashers and ASSUME that those of us who are staunch supporters of nursing WHEREVER it is that nursing mom deems comfortable--have a lack of modesty. How amazingly IRONIC that is.

We shouldn't assume that you are only seeing a minimal percentage of nursing moms *exposed* but yet you can assume that we are flashers. Irony at its best.

Did you keep your babies locked up at home for 12 months by any chance?

 

[noodleknitter]

I'm sorry, but this whole line of discussion reminds me of the "don't speak during birth" goofiness!

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I'm sorry, but this whole line of discussion reminds me of the "don't speak during birth" goofiness!

Well now why did you have to bring religion into it?



(my apologies for any damage that fit of laughter may have caused to anyone).

 

[pperfectmom]

This thread is alternating between hilarious and scary. I'm just glad I never ran into any of these folks while nursing my two children. I have a problem with making your child go hungry for any reason and, as far as I'm concerned, if you don't like it, too bad. Also, I guess my children will have to see a therapist because I never found a way to pry their eyes open while they were nursing.

 

[chobie]

This thread is alternating between hilarious and scary. I'm just glad I never ran into any of these folks while nursing my two children. I have a problem with making your child go hungry for any reason and, as far as I'm concerned, if you don't like it, too bad. Also, I guess my children will have to see a therapist because I never found a way to pry their eyes open while they were nursing.

If you can find a therapist that specializes in kids traumatized from not having everyone of their 10-12 breastfeedings a day being a magical, ethereal and/or wonderous event, please let me me know. My kids need to see that therapist too.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

This thread is alternating between hilarious and scary. I'm just glad I never ran into any of these folks while nursing my two children. I have a problem with making your child go hungry for any reason and, as far as I'm concerned, if you don't like it, too bad. Also, I guess my children will have to see a therapist because I never found a way to pry their eyes open while they were nursing.

Ooh Oooh! Let me tell you how I get them to open their eyes! First- while I am pool hopping with my refillable mug from my trip back in 1987 I take my top completely off. Are you with me? Okay good- then I shake my breasts out. Not really a shimmy but a full blown side to side shake your sillies out kind of shake. This helps to get the milk flowing. Still with me? Okay- now while I am doing this I have my dh hold the baby up to eye level with me so I can make sure that my darling can see me. Heaven forbid we lose eye contact! Then the bond would be broken and I'd have to start our ritual all over again! Okay- so we have free breasts, eye contact- now we need lift off. Soooo.....my dh then makes an announcement on his portable megaphone that everyone must please be quiet as his baby needs to nurse!!!!! We don't want sensory overload. God help that poor bird who choses to tweet too loudly! So then when my child is nursing I stare into his eyes and if he gets sleepy I quickly unlatch him, hand him to dh and start my breast shake all over again. It gets all of our blood flowing so we are bright eyed. Then when we are done dh makes an announcement that everyone can go about their business again. We then take our refillable mugs and get a frozen yogurt before we go to find those extra family members we were able to sneak into our room.


I am sorry but I had to lighten this thread a bit.

 

[glass slipper girl]

FredS/Tinkmom...please don't assume that just because I happen to need to nurse my baby on a park bench at WDW and may not spend the entire time gazing into his or her eyes that this never happens. My youngest son and I spent many hours looking in to each other's eyes while nursing and I agree that it was wonderful but we also had times where his older brother had an activity to be at and my little one got hungry. At that time, we may have been somewhere where safety deemed than I needed to keep my eyes on my older child (such as at his MyGym class or on the playground) or sometimes he was just doing something he thoroughly enjoyed and I wanted to be able to watch my older child...who I love just as much as my baby and find watching him have fun just as wonderfull and fulfilling as gazing in to my baby's eyes) so I would be focused on something other than my infant. It would be unfair to my older kids for me to say "we can't do anything outside this house untill Mommy is done nursing the baby because I must be able to focus 100% of my attention on him/her while nursing...I can not have to look at you at all." My son would be awake for about 1/2 of his nursing session and drift off to sleep after that. Telling Moms that they missed out because their babies nursed with their eyes closed is a bit much though...what are those mothers to do? Scotch tape their babies eyes open?? Startle their babies till they open their eyes? I am sure that those mothers still felt the amazing closeness and bond with their babies even though their eyes were closed. I even felt that bond with my oldest son

I have to say I've seen exactly one Mom who was nursing without even an attempt at being discrete. She was walking through the aisle at WalMart nursing her baby. She had her shirt unbuttoned from the top down and pulled to the side exposing her entire breast as she fed. That said, she was speaking German to her husband. Maybe she was from Germany and visiting the US...maybe nursing that way is more common there...I don't know. I was taken aback by it because it's not something I normally see but I wasn't OFFENDED by it. I can sort of understand how someone may be offended by that (although I still maintain that if there is a baby attached to it, a breast is not seen as as sexual...but that's my opinion, and it is shared by my husband as well). Other than that, if I've seen anything from a nursing Mom...and this includes playgroups, parks, zoos, playgrounds, malls, pediatrician's offices etc., it has been a Mom who was doing her best to be discrete but baby quickly pushed her shirt up or unlatched and turned his head and Mom was quick to cover up. I'm not offended by that in the slightest, I don't see anything wrong with it. We're talking less of a glimpse than Janet Jackson gave.

I do agree that every woman who nurses her child discretely in public makes it easier for the next Mom to do so. I know with my first when I was trying desperately to making nursing work for us, I was INCREDIBLY intimidated at the idea of nursing in public. By the time my 2nd was born I had been involved in playgroups with several nursing Moms and been around them nursing during playgorup, at the playground, in restaurants etc. so when it came time to venture out of the house with baby #2, I was a bit nervous at first but not intimidated anymore. I practiced in front of a mirror at home (silly, I know but I've always been "blessed in cup size" and wanted to make sure I was not flashing the world) and after a couple of times nursing him whenever and whereever with no comment from anyone, I felt more confident and by the time he was a year old, I thought nothing of it. I also agree that women who make no attempt at discretion do set the nursing in public thing back because they are the ones that will be brought up over and over in this discussion. That doesn't mean I don't support their right to nurse in whatever manner they need to, just that I do recognize that it is that mom in Walmart...not me who stayed covered up that those people who oppose nursing in public will remember and bring up each time this issue comes up (and I never used a blanket as I live in the South and had my kids in spring and summer so it was hot AND b/c my son would not tolerate a blanket so it just drew more attention to us as he waved his arms and kicked his feet to knock it down ) .

 

[AnaheimGirl]

You make some amazing assumptions, both about the number of women I have encountered nursing, and how, apparently, I am wrong to think that the 3 or so women I have seen who are exhibiting much more than they need to are acting inappropriately. I am not holding a few's misbehavior against every nursing mother, sheesh! And if you have never seen a nursing mother exposed her breast AT ALL then great and wonderful; I don't see how anyone could have a problem with that. I am merely noting that mothers who decide it is okay to show it all are not helping to make public nursing more accepted.

You seem to have missed the point of my post. I agree that women who take off their entire shirt to nurse in a public place are acting inappropriately. What I don't agree with is the relevence of this observation to the discussion at hand. I think it is ridiculous that the teeny tiny portion of bf mothers who act inappropriately get brought up again and again in every internet discussion of breastfeeding (not just you here, please don't take it personally, you just happen to be one of those who did it in this thread).

If this were a discussion about progress women are making in the workplace, and someone posted that "every woman CEO makes it easier for the next", would you respond with "Yes and no. Only those that know what they're doing. One place I worked had a woman CEO that ran the business into the ground, and on top of that, she was mean and witchy. Women CEO's like her set women in business back by leaps and bounds." ??

Seriously, can you imagine anyone making such an ignorant and sexist comment? I can't.

So really, how is your comment different? Again, not to pick on you Fred/Tink, you were just the most recent person to make this kind of comment.

I was perfectly civil and stating a reasonable comment in response to another's comment that every time a nursing mother is seen out that it helps other nursing moms. There are several posters who seemed intent on saying that they will nurse whenever and wherever and however they wish, crowds or modesty be damned.

I never said you weren't being civil , you are taking my disagreement too personally, if you think I was berating you or something. And I think you are reading too much into people's responses that they will bf anywhere the child is hungry. Who said "modesty be damned", or anything remotely like it?

And mothers whose babies never looked at them while nursing? They have missed an amazing thing. My Lord, that has to be the most beautiful interaction in the entire world: a mom sweet talking, cuddling and nursing her baby, who stops periodically to smile and coo back at mama. Popping a nipple in their mouth and going on with whatever isn't quite the same.

Sorry, but my dd and I didn't miss a thing during those closed eye bf sessions, we interacted just fine thankyouverymuch.

I am entitled to my opinion, just as others who find events such as giving birth, breastfeeding and even sexual intercourse quite beautiful, but really don't care to see every gritty detail of other people doing these things.

Please give me one example in this thread where anyone indicated they would be indiscreet in their public breastfeeding.

A little tolerance of others goes a long way, and that isn't a one way (everyone should agree with ME and let me do what I think best) street.

Pot, meet kettle.

 

[AnaheimGirl]

Ooh Oooh! Let me tell you how I get them to open their eyes! First- while I am pool hopping with my refillable mug from my trip back in 1987 I take my top completely off. Are you with me? Okay good- then I shake my breasts out. Not really a shimmy but a full blown side to side shake your sillies out kind of shake. This helps to get the milk flowing. Still with me? Okay- now while I am doing this I have my dh hold the baby up to eye level with me so I can make sure that my darling can see me. Heaven forbid we lose eye contact! Then the bond would be broken and I'd have to start our ritual all over again! Okay- so we have free breasts, eye contact- now we need lift off. Soooo.....my dh then makes an announcement on his portable megaphone that everyone must please be quiet as his baby needs to nurse!!!!! We don't want sensory overload. God help that poor bird who choses to tweet too loudly! So then when my child is nursing I stare into his eyes and if he gets sleepy I quickly unlatch him, hand him to dh and start my breast shake all over again. It gets all of our blood flowing so we are bright eyed. Then when we are done dh makes an announcement that everyone can go about their business again. We then take our refillable mugs and get a frozen yogurt before we go to find those extra family members we were able to sneak into our room.


I am sorry but I had to lighten this thread a bit.

OMG!! Tears are streaming down my face right now!!

 

[Mackey Mouse]

I truly think this thread has run its course. I think we should leave it at that and realize that not everyone is going to agree with everyone else.. we are all entitled to our opinions and some are more over the top than others.. I am locking this thread at this time..