What Would Your Reaction Be?

[QueenElsaTheFirst]

We're remodeling our kitchen right now, so our garage is full of construction type stuff. So after being spoiled and always parking in the garage, I've been parking in our driveway for the past month or so.

I've gotten in the habit over the last several years of leaving my purse in the car in the garage. I'm horribly absent-minded so it's helpful to just leave it in the car so I never forget it. Well I've still been doing it, and my husband has been connnnstantly harassing me not to do it, or to at least lock the door to my car if I do ( I always forget that too since I'm used to parking inside!)

Anyway, this morning I took my boys to school and went to the grocery store with my daughter, got all the way there and realized my purse was gone! I didn't panic at first, thinking I left it at home. But got home, searched the house top to bottom, and no luck. Then I got back in the car and went to all the places I was yesterday (with a cranky 3 year old in tow.) No luck finding it. I'm panicking at this point because I have my wallet, my checkbook, my sons' fundraising money for their tball team and other things in there. I called the CC companies, and good news, no charges on the cards after yesterday. I figured the purse hadn't been stolen at that point, since the criminals usually use the stuff right away. We have a huge dumpster at the end of our driveway for the construction garbage, and so I ended up climbing in and going through that for an hour to see if it had inadvertently been tossed out with scraps from the kitchen.

Long story short, I never found it. My husband came home and I'm like dreadddding telling him because of the "I told you so" that I know is inevitably coming. He says,

"You look frazzled, what's up?" (Incidentally this should have been my first clue, he never notices the way I'm feeling ) I tell him I lost my purse and a huge grin cracks over his face and he says,

"Hmmmm, maybe in future you'll remember to lock your car!" And he pulls my purse out of his work briefcase!!!!! He had walked out to his car this morning and noticed my car was unlocked again, so he grabbed my purse and took it to work with him.

So yeah. I'm LIVID. Though I get that he was trying to be helpful I think what he did was ridiculous and infantilizing. Then again, I know his heart was in the right place. And he's currently putting all three kids to bed while I relax in a bubble bath with a glass of merlot to make up for my day

What would your reaction be if your SO did this? Totally egregious and just begging for an at-home vasectomy, or a worthwhile lesson for this very absentminded mom?

 

[#1hoosierfan]

We're remodeling our kitchen right now, so our garage is full of construction type stuff. So after being spoiled and always parking in the garage, I've been parking in our driveway for the past month or so. I've gotten in the habit over the last several years of leaving my purse in the car in the garage. I'm horribly absent-minded so it's helpful to just leave it in the car so I never forget it. Well I've still been doing it, and my husband has been connnnstantly harassing me not to do it, or to at least lock the door to my car if I do ( I always forget that too since I'm used to parking inside!) Anyway, this morning I took my boys to school and went to the grocery store with my daughter, got all the way there and realized my purse was gone! I didn't panic at first, thinking I left it at home. But got home, searched the house top to bottom, and no luck. Then I got back in the car and went to all the places I was yesterday (with a cranky 3 year old in tow.) No luck finding it. I'm panicking at this point because I have my wallet, my checkbook, my sons' fundraising money for their tball team and other things in there. I called the CC companies, and good news, no charges on the cards after yesterday. I figured the purse hadn't been stolen at that point, since the criminals usually use the stuff right away. We have a huge dumpster at the end of our driveway for the construction garbage, and so I ended up climbing in and going through that for an hour to see if it had inadvertently been tossed out with scraps from the kitchen. Long story short, I never found it. My husband came home and I'm like dreadddding telling him because of the "I told you so" that I know is inevitably coming. He says, "You look frazzled, what's up?" (Incidentally this should have been my first clue, he never notices the way I'm feeling I tell him I lost my purse and a huge grin cracks over his face and he says, "Hmmmm, maybe in future you'll remember to lock your car!" And he pulls my purse out of his work briefcase!!!!! He had walked out to his car this morning and noticed my car was unlocked again, so he grabbed my purse and took it work with him. So yeah. I'm LIVID. Though I get that he was trying to be helpful I think what he did was ridiculous and infantilizing. Then again, I know his heart was in the right place. And he's currently putting all three kids to bed while I relax in a bubble bath with a glass of merlot to make up for my day What would your reaction be if your SO did this? Totally egregious and just begging for an at-home vasectomy, or a worthwhile lesson for this very absentminded mom?

He would be kicked out of the bed for a VERY long time.

 

[superme80]

I'd be irritated, but I understand why your SO did it. At least your SO had it!

 

[Gumbo4x4]

So the question is, will you be more responsible with your purse?

 

[Luvchefmic]

I'm on his side, think you should count your blessings that it wasn't taken and learn the lesson You know what a hassle/identity theft etc that could have involved ? and you had the T-Ball funddraising $ in your care too ?? No no sympathy from me

 

[Disneylover99]

On the one hand, I get what he did. But on the other hand, I would be totally ticked if I were you. Allowing you to think your purse had been stolen all day was not cool.

 

[lisaviolet]

What would your reaction be if your SO did this?

Pissed off.

 

[izzy]

I'm on his side, think you should count your blessings that it wasn't taken and learn the lesson You know what a hassle/identity theft etc that could have involved ? and you had the T-Ball funddraising $ in your care too ?? No no sympathy from me

ITA.

And this sounds like something that Ricky would have done to Lucy on "I Love Lucy."

 

[JanaDee]

Maybe you'll remember to take your purse inside from now on. I would have done the same thing to DH if he continued to do something so foolish.

 

[kimblebee]

I'd be mad but only because it was my own fault. My fiancé hates it when I throw my wallet in the shopping cart and leave it while I go down the aisle to look for something.

 

[QueenElsaTheFirst]

To clarify, it was the money we personally were donating for Tball, not other people's money, but yes, not very responsible regardless.

 

[Caseheidi]

I'm split on this. On his side, you do need to remember to take your purse in and lock the door. If you forget at home because it is habit, what makes you not forget when you run errands or go shopping? Habits like this tend to bite us in the end....
But on the other side, what if you had decided to file a police report and cancel you credit cards and bank account because you thought it had been taken? And you were driving around all day without your license. What if you had an accident or got pulled over. I think his method was a little extreme, and he owes you a little more then a break from putting the kids to bed.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

While you're livid now, imagine the slow burn DH must have been doing watching you day after day being so completely reckless with the security of your car, your family finances, even your home (since I assume you keep a garage opener in your unlocked car) after constant pleas on his part not to.

Sometimes being on the wrong end of such disrespectful actions leads folks to do something disrespectful as well. Two wrongs don't make a right. But, you did start it. So, try to keep that in mind.

 

[Disneylover99]

To clarify, it was the money we personally were donating for Tball, not other people's money, but yes, not very responsible regardless.

Cut yourself some slack. I think it's wrong to mess with someone's mind like that.

 

[EMode]

I'd be livid too, I don't think he needed to teach you a lesson like you are a child. Locking the car or him running your purse into the house before he left and a reminder to you to bring it in the house next time would have been fine.

 

[JanaDee]

While you're livid now, imagine the slow burn DH must have been doing watching you day after day being so completely reckless with the security of your car, your family finances, even your home (since I assume you keep a garage opener in your unlocked car) after constant pleas on his part not to.

Sometimes being on the wrong end of such disrespectful actions leads folks to do something disrespectful as well. Two wrongs don't make a right. But, you did start it. So, try to keep that in mind.

Exactly.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

I'm split on this. On his side, you do need to remember to take your purse in and lock the door. If you forget at home because it is habit, what makes you not forget when you run errands or go shopping? Habits like this tend to bite us in the end....
But on the other side, what if you had decided to file a police report and cancel you credit cards and bank account because you thought it had been taken? And you were driving around all day without your license. What if you had an accident or got pulled over. I think his method was a little extreme, and he owes you a little more then a break from putting the kids to bed.

OTOH, sounds like if she'd just asked him if he'd seen the purse, he would have fessed up. Only reason it took all day was because she was too embarrassed to call him.

 

[Robinrs]

I don't know where you live but growing up where I grew up the idea of leaving a purse alone even for a minute is beyond my realm of thought....

If I were you I'd be thrilled he taught you a lesson instead of having to deal with the NIGHTMARE of losing a purse...something that happened to me ONCE and I hope never happens again. Mine was stolen and what I had to do to close all those accts and replace everything was more work than you can imagine.

Consider yourself lucky~

 

[Neesy228]

I'd be livid too, I don't think he needed to teach you a lesson like you are a child. Locking the car or him running your purse into the house before he left and a reminder to you to bring it in the house next time would have been fine.

Agreed.

 

[Allison]

I'm on his side, think you should count your blessings that it wasn't taken and learn the lesson You know what a hassle/identity theft etc that could have involved ? and you had the T-Ball funddraising $ in your care too ?? No no sympathy from me

I have to agree.