What would you have done differently?

[MistressOfAllEvil]

Oh, yeah. Don't even get me started on that. My best friend of 10 years (Maid of Honor) dropped out of my wedding IN AN E-MAIL.

What I realized that is - if somebody doesn't want to go, no matter how much you accomodate them, they won't go. That's why it's best to do what YOU want to do for your wedding. I offered to pay for all her travel expenses, dress, shoes, hair, makeup, etc - I even offered to change our wedding date around her college classes. And then I get the e-mail. Heh.

Then, my other friend who was totally onboard with going - I e-mailed her at work (since we chat at work) after the holidays asking if she'd be able to fly down the day before because we're having a welcome dinner.

"Oh, about that."

Apparently, her family is flying in from overseas for Thanksgiving and now she can't afford the expense somehow. I still don't understand what that has to do with it. Our wedding isn't until December 12th!

I'm already having drama now with my third BM. Trust me, just save yourself the trouble and ask them later than sooner. Sorry if I sound so bitter, this just all happened within a few months and I feel so hurt that I'm losing friends over our wedding.

I'm now accepting applications for DIS BMs. Any takers? XD

I know all too well about this. Or I should said my fiance does. If you get a chance, Check my PJ out. There has been some major, crummy behavior on the part of his two best men. I'm sorry that anyone has had to go through what we've been through. If I could, I would wrap you up in wedding bliss.

 

[DisBride2007]

I don't really regret anything, but if I could go back and change a few things it would be:

1) I would have been a little more experimental with our colors. We just chose navy blue with silver accents. It was very difficult to choose flowers. I've seen so many great TR's where people used pink or orange or others, which looked great.

2) Not exactly about the wedding, but I wish that we purchased one day tickets for some of my family members, for example, my parents. We go to Disney all the time and they've only been once, fifteen years ago. They didn't want to pay the $75 for the tickets. I wish I had just bought them as a gift and shared in the experience with them.

Hope this helps for all others. Remember it will never be perfect... but it will be wonderful anyway!

 

[cp_princess]

I'm now accepting applications for DIS BMs. Any takers? XD[/quote]

I would happily do so for a fellow disbride - but unfortunately I'll be in the middle of the ocean till the 13th - so that kinda sucks! I'm sorry your BM are bing such a pain. Friends who aren't friends are a big pet-peeve for me. That's why I only have one BM-my MOH. But I've known her for over 25 years and am Godmother to her daughter so she better not drop out!

 

[pink_tink8i8]

I agree with cp_princess....friends who aren't friends are just annoying. I have "friends" like that too that's why I only have my MOH and I didn't even bother to invite some of my friends to my wedding because I know they won't show up.

 

[disneybridetobe]

(Despite my username, I was married in Sept 06!)

I would have invited less people. We had an intimate (now called something else, the small package) wedding and we had 13 people there, and it was impossible to keep track of that many people's plans, itineraries, and whereabouts. It's amazing how adults can't follow directions... I even printed up itineraries. Even crazier, no one understands how to make travel arrangements, and my mom decided to skip Disney altogether and take her ex-bf to Cocoa Beach. Fun.

That leads me to #2- No unmarried couples in wedding pictures! Now, we have my mom's ex-bf and my FIL's ex-gf in our wedding photos.

#3- Welcome bags. I poured my heart and soul into gift bags which included hand-designed, handmade t-shirts (really nice ones, too!), sunscreen, door hangers, cameras... soup to nuts. Did anyone really care? NO! No one even used the cameras. What a waste.

(Don't mean to be a downer... it's just what I'd have done differently)

 

[mermaidbride1108]

I'm definitely taking all of your advice to heart

Lurkyloo-you'll be proud to know I've already marked down in my wedding notes to only pick 2 resorts for that darn bus and secretly put my honeymoon resort down too!

We are planning to actually go to Disney the Weekend (cheaply at a Value Resort) before, hopefully come down Friday and then leave on Thursday morning for our Honeymoon.- Disney Cruise to give us alone time where they can't follow us!

And one major pet peeve is everyone asking me who my bridesmaids are... I mean come on I have time and I hear from almost every bride I know that their bridesmaid changed during the wedding process. I already asked my best friend Angie (it was a given it would be her) and teenage years didn't tear us apart so hopefully a wedding won't! And my almost little sister because she said from DF and I very first date when she was like 13 that she thought I was gonna marry him and that if I did She wanted to be a bridesmaid. You know as soon as DF proposed that that was her first question to me And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Other than that I'm waiting to see who I really want and who is definitely making the trip. This is when I'll use my time card here! The other two i just couldn't do without

I'm definitely jotting down no cell phone in welcome bags! I'll put DF's instead and give him the grief...

And I decided against doing really nice welcome bags too. I had all this stuff from oriental trading picked out to go with the theme but no one will use it afterwards. I just sold the cameras I had planned to use and decided to do a snack and most commonly forgoten travel stuff

Great Thread!

 

[pink_tink8i8]

OMG...I think the people that were planning on coming down for my disney wedding are planning to stay for our disneymoon too. I thought it would be nice to have a family vacation and get together. Now I'm traumatized because a couple of people said they would change having people "follow" them around. Yikes! was it really that awful?

 

[lurkyloo]

#2- No unmarried couples in wedding pictures! Now, we have my mom's ex-bf and my FIL's ex-gf in our wedding photos. )

Amen to that! I got miffed last summer when I wasn't allowed in someone's wedding photo b/c DF and I weren't engaged yet, but now I wish I could enforce that rule at MY wedding.

#3- Welcome bags. Did anyone really care? NO! No one even used the cameras. What a waste.

HOORAY!!!! Thank you so much for saying that - I officially no longer feel guilty that I'm skipping welcome bags. Now where's that banana...?

Lurkyloo-you'll be proud to know I've already marked down in my wedding notes to only pick 2 resorts for that darn bus and secretly put my honeymoon resort down too!

Right, on! Now let's see if I can't sell you on my "no bridesmaids" policy and solve that other problem of yours....

 

[Beep]

The one thing I hadn't thought of is company on our honeymoon! All our geusts (except one) will be coming from the UK - some are coming for two weeks which is either the week before and the week of the wedding or the week of the wedding and the week after. Either way will will have people there for the three weeks we are there.

We'll have to make it very clear that we want time alone and are not tour guides.

Thank you for the warning on that, I wouldn't have thought of it.

We are also not doing gift bags, but I am doing favours for the ladies. There will only be 6 of them (if they all go) and I would rather do that than gift bags.

After just reading about the horrors of people calling all the time, no way are they getting my mobile number on the information sheet! If they can't work out how to get from one place to another - tough! The only thing they have to do is meet for the meal the night before and then get to the Boardwalk on the day.

Great advice and tips, thanks

 

[BethanyMouse]

Great advice so far. This is a great thread. I never thought about not giving my cell number out to the guests but now that it has been mentioned it makes complete sense. I DO NOT want to be bothered with directions that day! Keep the advice coming and Thanks!

 

[padisneyfour]

we when go with family/friends on vacations we provide info ahead(esp. for disney )give the general lay of the land per se and then maybe one day showing around to be familiar then we have our plans , you do yours. Its worked well for us multiple times. (My DH favorite line is "Its my vacation too" We may meet up for a meal here and there sometimes...

 

[mermaidbride1108]

Right, on! Now let's see if I can't sell you on my "no bridesmaids" policy and solve that other problem of yours....

You absolutely crack me up! When I'm complaining about my expesive one day only bridesmaids bouquets that will end up as trash on my dance floor, Iremind myself that I was fore warned!

This should totally be your smile whenever someone mentions the word 'bus'

 

[lurkyloo]

This should totally be your smile whenever someone mentions the word 'bus'

BWaaahahahaaha! Or should I say, ?

 

[DisBride2007]

Oh, I just thought of another one!

Give your (and DH's) digital camera to a close friend or relative before the ceremony. They will be able to take pictures for you throughout the ceremony and reception. Obviously, they won't be as good as the professional pictures, but you will be dying during the four to six weeks it takes to get those back! I can't even count how many people asked to see pictures as soon as we came back from the wedding. I was like, "we don't have any!"

 

[JandJ]

Everything was actually perfect and I wouldn't have changed a thing. All the worry I had was for nothing because Disney made it completely magical!

I guess one thing that I should have done, and it's pretty minor, I should have thought about slicing up our cake and boxing it up and giving it to our guests to take back to their rooms. We had a TON of cake leftover. It just went to waste, so in hindsight I should have had pieces of cake boxed up for each guest.

One bit of advice for future brides - Take it all in and don't rush your day. Stop and smell the roses, literally and figuratively, and take the time to enjoy each moment. It really does go by so fast.

 

[amendez830]

I would say my day was perfect, but their are a few things i would have done differently.

1) not have left so many minor planning things till the end. ex favors, programs,etc
2) spent less time at Disney before the wedding and more after the wedding. We spent our pre-wedding back and forth with the tuxedo's. Mind you we had them delivery by AfterHours but getting everyone to try the on to make sure everything was correct was a mess(even though we gave the a time frame).
3) Gave more of an understanding to my planner and florist of my theme. Even though everything was still amazing I would have loved for the reception to have had more of a fallish feeling.
4) Had a dessert Party after seeing everyones pics I wish i would have had one.
5) Ate more at the reception...I only had one bite of my cake. All that money on food and I really did not eat it.

My advice is enjoy your day it really does go by soooo fast and also remember it is your wedding plan it how you want it and do not let others interfere.

 

[MistressOfAllEvil]

I would say my day was perfect, but their are a few things i would have done differently.

1) not have left so many minor planning things till the end. ex favors, programs,etc.

too late for that. I'm running on pixie dust trying to wrap up all this last minute cr*p. bah.

Great suggestions though! (didn't mean to get all snarky on ya!!)

 

[PRINCESSAJ]

I would have stayed in the MAGIC for our honeymoon or gone on a Disney Cruise,
as we went off to St Lucia and we really missed all the pixie dust!!

 

[jnale]

great thread! subscribing

We arent married yet, but Ive already learned one thing:

Don't get your MIL involved in the guest list!

To add to the above....don't get your MIL involved in any decisions! Or to put it another way don't let your MIL bully you into doing things her way.

 

[BethanyMouse]

Oh, I just thought of another one!

Give your (and DH's) digital camera to a close friend or relative before the ceremony. They will be able to take pictures for you throughout the ceremony and reception. Obviously, they won't be as good as the professional pictures, but you will be dying during the four to six weeks it takes to get those back! I can't even count how many people asked to see pictures as soon as we came back from the wedding. I was like, "we don't have any!"

Very good idea! Most times these are the cameras that catch some great shots! Good advice!