What would you do?

[lolafrompensacola]

We had a friend of my daughter's over one day this weekend (both are 6). Both kids were playing Wii (tennis). Lots of laughter, good times trying the hit the ball, etc. This was this child's first time playing the Wii. We went over the safety instructions - all was good.

I leave the room to put some dishes in the dishwasher, and you guessed it, I hear a bang. She hit the tennis raquet attachment of the Wiimote right into my LCD tv. She is laughing holding the raquet separate from the wiimote when I walk back in. Only then did I look at the tv and see the lines of doom. The LCD is cracked and unfixable.

Her parents came to pick her up (of course I had to run my mom over to the store just before they got there), but they ended up getting their daughter from the backyard and putting her in the car. They called from the car that they had taken her - no walk up to the door, go around back to say hello, nothing. My husband said he was on the way out to say hi when he had to go back in to take the call...

Anyway, the guys at work said I have to tell them (these are all guys without kids) and that they "should" offer up some sort of compensation. I just was going to chalk it up to stuff happens...I certainly would never ask anyone to pay for a replacement tv (we are going to wait til around xmas to see if we can get a deal...)

Would you expect to pay for someone else's tv if your child accidentally broke it?

 

[cathyce2]

If my child had broken the tv I would want to know about it and I would definitely offer to pay for a replacement.

 

[MommaSnowwhite]

Our DD9 broke our LCD this past June with a Wii mote. I wouldn't expect any compensation - they are 6. I wouldn't leave them alone. I learned the hard way too.

 

[MickeyMomOfThree]

Tough call. We have a Wii, and the kids know the rules, but DD14 was at a friends house and they have really low ceilings and DD swung (I think playing baseball) and knocked out a light on the ceiling. She didn't do anything wrong, but it jsut sort of happened. I said I'd ay but turned out she only broke the lightbulb. BUT, I only knew because my DD told me, the mom didn't say anything. If the kid doesn't tell the mom and you haven't she may never know.
Honestly, it's a tough call. I know when we have friends over to play I am so nervous about taht happening (and we have an old tv, I can't imagine with a nice one!)
Good luck whatever you decide to do...

 

[jennykay]

I'm sorry about your tv. That really stinks. To answer your question, if I was there watching my child and he broke the tv, then I would offer. Or if I was told that my child had willfully destroyed something, I would offer.

I tend to think of things this way: if a child is at my house without her parents, then I treat her as one of mine. If she is hungry, I feed her. If she misbehaves, I deal with her. If she breaks something, I clean it up and/or replace it. Basically, if I am the one watching her, I take responsibility for whatever happens when she is there.

This is just my opinion, though, and my tv is 11 years old - I would welcome a reason to replace it lol! You have to do whatever feels right to you. If you are going to feel resentful or not want the child over again, then you probably will want to say something. Those guys at work, though? The ones without children? They are probably thinking the way I did before I had kids - that mine would never do this or that because I would teach them better, etc.. and boy was I wrong!

Good luck - let us know how it turns out!

 

[lolafrompensacola]

I tend to think of things this way: if a child is at my house without her parents, then I treat her as one of mine. If she is hungry, I feed her. If she misbehaves, I deal with her. If she breaks something, I clean it up and/or replace it. Basically, if I am the one watching her, I take responsibility for whatever happens when she is there.

I totally feel this way. I am so mad that I left the room, that I didn't put a barrier between the kids and the tv...All the things "I" could have done differently...not the child. I can chalk it up to stuff happens - not great - but hey, there could be a lot worse that could happen. My Dh is not happy, but he watches that tv more than I do...

But then when all these guys start getting on me at work (I told the story in an anecdotal way - not a complainy way) ,telling me I should call them right up and tell them what happened... If they were good people they would give me money...Yuck...I just needed my Dis people to set me straight (of course I had to come on to post this anonomously)...Thank you for your responses.

I look at it this way, I am going to buy one of those tv armor things (the things you find about after something like this happens) and the kids will have a awesome (albeit rainbowy on one side) tv to put in their playroom in the basement.

 

[SLK1]

I have to agree about not saying anything. The child did not intentionally do it, and from the sounds of other posts, things can happen with those Wii's! It's more annoying when someone else breaks your stuff than when you break your own stuff, but that's what can happen when kids play together. It's a bummer, for sure. Try to make it "exciting" that your DH can buy a new TV!!!!

 

[brockash]

I think it kinda depends on the situation, but in this situation, I probably wouldn't say anything, and definetely wouldn't expect her parents to pay for anything. I have a 6 year old and 18 month old, and I guess I kinda feel like because she was only 6, it probably was a complete accident. If it was just because she was being a brat and not listening ect. then maybe I would say something, but I still wouldn't expect for her parent's to pay for anything. - I might decide that my DD is only allowed to play with that girl outside or around things that were unbreakable, otherwise I think I would feel like it's my responsibility to watch them ect. and decide what's appopriate, what they can handle ect. Good luck!

 

[Luv Bunnies]

I wouldn't say anything to the parents. It sounds like it was an accident. Now, if the kid was horsing around and didn't stop after being warned or threw a fit and broke something then the parents should be told. But, a couple of 6 year olds laughing and playing...sounds like an honest mistake.

 

[cerberus]

It sounds like an accident, but as a parent I would want to know and I would pay to replace the TV.

 

[vcr]

Honestly, I feel that when a child is at my house, their parent expects me to watch them and if something happens when I am watching them, I am responsible. You have to make the call based on the situation. My DD was at a friend's house before and fell in the poool while holding another friends cell phone. I gave the parents the money to replace it. I also had the situation once where my DD friend came over and instead of ringing the bell, banged on her window and shattered the glass. I was glad no one was hurt and because I knew the child lived in an abusive situation (been reported to CPS several times), I elected not to call the grandmother she lived with. The $100 to replace the glass wasn't worth what that child would have had to go through. If it was a different friend, I would have called.

 

[pyrxtc]

I voted other since I would let the parents know. Hopefully they offer compensation sicne a 6 yr old is old enough to understand what happened and not think it was funny. I would tell parents that I will split the cost of the replacement TV with them and find a price for the same size/quality that you have.

It was a lesson learned and next time, I'm sure they will not be playing Wii alone or with you in the room.

 

[glesgalass]

It depends how well I know them. If they were good friends or I had known them for a long time, I would say it in a non accusing way, you know sort of "watch out if you're paying the Wii," or "You know those warnings about the Wii?" I wouldn't accept if they made an offer, as I agree it's my house, I should be making sure it's all safe for the kids to play. Having said that, if it was my child who'd had the accident, I'd offer to pay something toward it, or to buy the gaurd for the new TV so that my child would be invited over again!!LOL

Incidentally, doesn't your insurance cover your for accidental damage to the TV?

 

[klj27]

I think you are totally right in not expecting them to pay. I can't afford an expensive tv. If I knew I may be at risk of paying for one if my child is playing wii unsupervised (even though temporarily) I would not allow my child to play wii at that house.

To me it is the same as if you had a $20,000 sculpture on your table and my daughter knocked it over. You accept responsibility for that item when you choose to put it in public.

 

[lolafrompensacola]

Update...I spoke to the mom this morning...She called to invite my daughter over for a play date. We chatted and I asked if her daughter told her about playing with the Wii. I told her what happened - that I just wanted to let her know about it. She was a little horrified and asked if she could replace the tv. I said - "No, thanks for offering, but that is not why I told you". We are pretty friendly - and I wouldn't want to feel any 'resentment/regret' about the situation. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders by telling her what happened. I hope she doesn't feel stressed out now - but she is totally the type to get it right out in the open if she does.

My DH just said today he could live with the tv as it is too - so we can wait for a really good deal...

Thanks for all your advice.

KLJ27 - I agree about the point about the sculpture. I have a girlfriend whose house I have not been over for years now (since my youngest started walking). They have glass objects at child eye level and white carpets, the whole non-child friendly thing going as far as home decorating. I stressed way too much while I was there (and told her so). She had a small baby at the time, I wonder if her decorating tastes have changed now that she has two....

 

[mjkacmom]

If my child broke something, I would offer to compensate, however, if another child broke something, I wouldn't tell the parents about it - accidents happen, and it was on my watch. I've had kids break things over here, and I've never mentioned them to the parents (always accidental).

 

[klj27]

I am so glad that you were able to say something to her and feel at peace with your decision.

 

[sk!mom]

Would you expect to pay for someone else's tv if your child accidentally broke it?

I would absolutly offer to pay if I knew my child broke it.

However, I would not mention this to the parents, ask for, or accept compensation. She's 6, not 12. it was an unfortunate accident that you knew was possible as evidenced by the need for safety rules to be discussed. You left them alone and the unfortunate occured. Buy a new TV and let it go.

 

[melancholywings]

I think you handled this perfectly. The mom should know but they shouldn't be responsible for replacing it as it was an accident.

We put a piece of tape on the floor and tell any visiting kids they can't 'step' over the line. Even then it's been hard with some of the kids who get a little too carried away.

 

[disykat]

I'm with the OP and the majority. Don't tell, don't ask for payment.

I had a gouge in my kitchen floor for years from a close friend's child playing. I wasn't watching closely enough and considered it my fault not his - no different than if my own child had done it.

I have to say though that if I found out my child had broken something at someone's home and I wasn't allowed to pay for it or replace it, our friendship would probably suffer. It would be really hard for me knowing they had to undergo expense because of my child. I would just be so mortified and would feel so much better if I was just allowed to replace it. It would make me really uncomfortable and I would probably start avoiding them.