What would you do if your teen daughter became pregnant???

[poohandwendy]

That was not the OP's question.

So sue me. For goodness sakes, what the heck is your problem?

I answered it as I saw fit. Nothing more, nothing less.

 

[N.Bailey]

That was not the OP's question.

I completely understand what Wendy is saying because I view the situation the same way she does.

My daughter however is only 14, so I'd be very upset, but I could never force my wishes on her. I'd just feel that a child would destroy her life (now that may not be accurate, but it's how I think I'd view the situation), but I still could not insist that she abort. Whatever decision she makes is the decision she has to live with.

At 14, I'm sure the topic has been discussed in many households across this great nation and our's is no exception. My daughter has already stated many times that she would never abort. Somehow, if faced with the situation, I would have to get behind that decision. Of course, it's easy to say what you'd do when you're speaking of hypothetical situations.

 

[poohandwendy]

Thank YOU Nance! ITA

Sheesh, I feel like I am being interogated on my answer. It's not a Congressional meeting, it's an informal discussion. Why is my particular answer being so thoroughly disected?

You want a literal interpretation?

What would I do if my teen daughter became pregnant?

Ok, I would sit down in a chair, I would start crying, I would go get tissues or toilet paper to wipe the mascara from under my eyes, I would hug my DD, I would continue crying. I would hand her some tissues or toilet paper, I would scratch my butt if it suddenly became itchy, I would try to calm down and think rationally, I would discuss her options, I would freak out, I would start crying again...

sheesh....

 

[chobie]

I completely understand what Wendy is saying because I view the situation the same way she does.

My daughter however is only 14, so I'd be very upset, but I could never force my wishes on her. I'd just feel that a child would destroy her life (now that may not be accurate, but it's how I think I'd view the situation), but I still could not insist that she abort. Whatever decision she makes is the decision she has to live with.

At 14, I'm sure the topic has been discussed in many households across this great nation and our's is no exception. My daughter has already stated many times that she would never abort. Somehow, if faced with the situation, I would have to get behind that decision. Of course, it's easy to say what you'd do when you're speaking of hypothetical situations.

That's nice. 250 + posts and only maybe two or three people answered that they would force their daughter to do or not do something. So, I just don't see how it the OP's question could have been interpeted as what would you force your daughter to do. Obviously, almost no one did interpret that way and the OP's question was relevent. That's all I'm saying.

 

[poohandwendy]

That's nice. 250 + posts and only maybe two or three people answered that they would force their daughter to do or not do something. So, I just don't see how it the OP's question could have been interpeted as what would you force your daughter to do. Obviously, almost no one did interpret that way and the OP's question was relevent. That's all I'm saying.

(last response to this off topic discussion of my responses to this thread)

For the record, I was not basing my posts on anyone elses responses. I didn't read any preceding mine (other than the first post of the thread). I would have posted the same exact thing if I were writing the 2nd post in the thread. I gave my opinion, period. And AGAIN, I did not say the OPs question was irrelevant, I explained that my response to a pregnancy was irrelevant to the choice being made. I NEVER mentioned anyone being forced to do anything. Agree, disagree..whattheheckever. I do not understand why my particular post and how I answer the question is so important anyways? (am I on candid camera or something?)

If my thoughts on this issue really chap your butt that bad, I would recommend placing my name on your ignore list.

 

[ryka]

Really, is there a certain age for that? If a 13 year old got pregnant they would automatically be emnancipated? If my DD gets pregnant according to the law I'm no longer responsible for her?

I don't know about the age. I was 16 and that is what I was told by the doctor that first told me I was pregnant because I was so scared to tell my mother. I was afraid she would force me to have an abortion or kick me out. He told me my mother has no say in what I do because now that I was pregnant I was consider an adult and everything is my choice.

My mother did tell me at first I should get an abortion. I did consider all the options because I knew I was going to be doing this by myself. I talked to my parents and teachers. Every one of them wanted either for me to give the baby up for adoption or abort it. Those choices just weren't for me. I knew after the first night that I knew I was going to have a baby that I was going to keep it. I never regretted my decision and it wasn't easy but I know I did what was right for me.

 

[FroggyinArk]

Thank YOU Nance! ITA

Sheesh, I feel like I am being interogated on my answer. It's not a Congressional meeting, it's an informal discussion. Why is my particular answer being so thoroughly disected?

You want a literal interpretation?

What would I do if my teen daughter became pregnant?

Ok, I would sit down in a chair, I would start crying, I would go get tissues or toilet paper to wipe the mascara from under my eyes, I would hug my DD, I would continue crying. I would hand her some tissues or toilet paper, I would scratch my butt if it suddenly became itchy, I would try to calm down and think rationally, I would discuss her options, I would freak out, I would start crying again...
sheesh....

that is about the most honest answer i think i have seen on a bulletin boadr in a very long time.

and for the record, i am sure that with a few screaming yelling sections added in for good measure and my hot temper that that is very very similar to w hat wiould happen at our house. our dd is 14 now, shes our last one,, we adopted our oldest when she was 16 and pregnant,, and on her way to a girls home, she and our grandson thank you turned out fine wit ha lot of loving care and a good home. we have had a 16 yr old come to us and tell us she was getting married and we couldnt stop her,, and same thing lots of love later,( and a divorce too, diff thread) shes fine. i think if what wendy posted isnt what you would do then you might want to examine yourself.

 

[chobie]

(last response to this off topic discussion of my responses to this thread)

For the record, I was not basing my posts on anyone elses responses. I didn't read any preceding mine (other than the first post of the thread). I would have posted the same exact thing if I were writing the 2nd post in the thread. I gave my opinion, period. And AGAIN, I did not say the OPs question was irrelevant, I explained that my response to a pregnancy was irrelevant to the choice being made. I NEVER mentioned anyone being forced to do anything. Agree, disagree..whattheheckever. I do not understand why my particular post and how I answer the question is so important anyways? (am I on candid camera or something?)

If my thoughts on this issue really chap your butt that bad, I would recommend placing my name on your ignore list.

You said "the question as to what would I do" is irrelevant. And I disagreed with that statement. You could have just said in response to my statement that your did not mean that. Instead you got defensive. If you can't handle someone disagreeing with a statement you made, even if you feel the statement was misinterpreted, then maybe you should put people who don't ITA every comment you make on ignore.

No, you're not on candid camera, but when you post on a commnity board, you will get people commenting on your comments.

 

[JennyMominRI]

I honestly don't know what I would do..I would get upset,and I would cry.I would support her in ANY choice she made,although I would hope she didn't choose an abortion..If she did,I would support her though.

 

[poohandwendy]

nevermind, not worth it

 

[chobie]

I don't know about the age. I was 16 and that is what I was told by the doctor that first told me I was pregnant because I was so scared to tell my mother. I was afraid she would force me to have an abortion or kick me out. He told me my mother has no say in what I do because now that I was pregnant I was consider an adult and everything is my choice.

My mother did tell me at first I should get an abortion. I did consider all the options because I knew I was going to be doing this by myself. I talked to my parents and teachers. Every one of them wanted either for me to give the baby up for adoption or abort it. Those choices just weren't for me. I knew after the first night that I knew I was going to have a baby that I was going to keep it. I never regretted my decision and it wasn't easy but I know I did what was right for me.

I'm sorry you were afraid of you mother. Have you reconciled with her or is your relationship still strained because you kept your baby?

 

[ryka]

I'm sorry you were afraid of you mother. Have you reconciled with her or is your relationship still strained because you kept your baby?

I was afraid at first because I knew she wouldn't be happy. The problem was they told me I couldn't see my boyfriend ( my son's father). He was older then me and they knew he wasn't any good. I didn't see that. I saw them forbidding me from doing something so I went behind their backs and saw him anyway. I ended up pregnant.

They weren't happy I was 16 and pregnant and they did tried to tell me to have an abortion. When I finally told them I was keeping the baby my mother changed. She accpeted it but like I said it was all on me. My father didn't talk to me for almost 2 years.

When I had my son my mother was in the delivery room with me. After I pushed him out ( which is a funny story) she ran over to the table they had him on and said I want to see my son. My son is so cute. I'm on the table lying there thinking I just pushed him out what is she talking about her son. He is 10 now and she spoils him and defends him all the time.

 

[ChuckB]

You said "the question as to what would I do" is irrelevant. And I disagreed with that statement. You could have just said in response to my statement that your did not mean that. Instead you got defensive. If you can't handle someone disagreeing with a statement you made, even if you feel the statement was misinterpreted, then maybe you should put people who don't ITA every comment you make on ignore.

No, you're not on candid camera, but when you post on a commnity board, you will get people commenting on your comments.

and when you jump a poster then YOU need to back off and think about the reactions that are caused, when you single out a post then you are asking for a defensive responce, it is only human, and I do apologize in advance for useing your post Chobie, to much argueing going on these days, in MY opinion.

 

[chobie]

and when you jump a poster then YOU need to back off and think about the reactions that are caused, when you single out a post then you are asking for a defensive responce, it is only human, and I do apologize in advance for useing your post Chobie, to much argueing going on these days, in MY opinion.

I did not jump all over the post. She made a statement. I disagreed with it. Isn't that the point of a discussion board? Singling out a post? What is the point of the button that automatically quotes and lets you reply to an individual comment?

BTW, did you have a comment about the OP? Or did you just come to

 

[ryka]

I want to add that I think this topic is very interesting. I know alot of parents would like to think it would never happen to their child but in all reality it could. I hope that alot of people can take this thread and talk to their children about it.

 

[poohandwendy]

She made a statement. I disagreed with it.

So you disagree that the question of what I would do is irrelevant to me? How could you disagree with what I am saying is relevant or irrelevant to me? I mean, you would have to be in my head to have an opinion on that.

 

[poohandwendy]

Ok, I went against my own advice to myself and kept answering this ridiculous (IMO) dissection of my responses. I will now walk away knowing I will deal with it if the situation arises and that is all that matters.

 

[chobie]

Ok, I went against my own advice to myself and kept answering this ridiculous (IMO) dissection of my responses. I will now walk away knowing I will deal with it if the situation arises and that is all that matters.

Nice YAGE!

 

[Kirk]

It´s interesting how many people seem to have a clear vision of what they would do if their teen daughter became pregnant.

What would you do if your, lets say, 16 year old DD came home pregnant?

'nuff said!


Oh! By the way, it's Cat's 2rd BD tomorrow!!!

 

[wannabee]

Very timely topic--- we just learned y'day that Dh's 19 year old DD is pregnant. I found out when I got some insurance forms in the mail. DH and I spoke with her today... 5 months along with a boy.... she is away at school so we don't see her everyday. We saw her in Febraury and never guessed it. She says she was waiting for the right time to tell us.