what would you do- birthday party?

[tchrchgo]

my two 6 yr old DS's were both invited to a mutual friend's 7th birthday party. it's in a few weeks, but it's at the same time as one ds's hockey class. it's a "minisession" that only runs for 5 weeks and is nonrefundable. my DS is very excited about the hockey, and I hate for him to miss a session when there are only 5 total.

The friend is not a very close one, he's actually closer to my other DS who is able to go. if you were the mom, would you be offended if a guest chose a hockey class over the birthday? it's a party at her house with cake, not one of those expensive pump it up parties. should I just say one DS will come but the other has a prior commitment? I would of course send a gift that was "two guests" worthy. (of course, for my DS's joint birthday party she got them stuff from target's clearance rack and even left the red clearance price tag on the stuff!)

I was thinking I would wait and see if he even liked the hockey class once it starts this saturday, and if he didn't like it then he could miss to go to the party.

Thanks for any advice!

 

[Tinijocaro]

if you were the mom, would you be offended if a guest chose a hockey class over the birthday?


No

should I just say one DS will come but the other has a prior commitment?

Yes


I would of course send a gift that was "two guests" worthy.

Why?

(of course, for my DS's joint birthday party she got them stuff from target's clearance rack and even left the red clearance price tag on the stuff!)

I was thinking I would wait and see if he even liked the hockey class once it starts this saturday, and if he didn't like it then he could miss to go to the party.

Thanks for any advice!

It's just a birthday party.

 

[lovesmurfs]

As a mom with lots of conflicts, I would certainly understand the hockey conflict, and I wouldn't feel that both needed to go to the party. Maybe you could take the DS who can't go to the party out for McDonalds after hockey or something to make up for not getting to go?

 

[Bluestars]

I would not be offended at all if a child, especially one who wasn't particularly close to my son, chose to go to a sport's practice instead of the party. No big deal.

 

[tchrchgo]

Thanks for the replies..... I always overthink everything! My DS taking hockey did not seem disappointed at all- I think he would have been more concerned if it was at a place he found really cool, rather than just the kid's house.

 

[laurie31]

When you RSVP, you don't have to give an excuse


Just call and say, "Thank you for inviting the boys. "A" will be able to come, but "B" can't make it." Since it's not "B's best friend, I wouldn't give it a second thought.

I've never asked anyone calling to decline a birthday party invite WHY their child can't come.

 

[portocall]

Having two boys a year apart, most of their friends invite both of them thinking that if they both don't get an invitation, neither will come. That isn't the reality, but I think that they are trying to be considerate by inviting both and won't be at all offended about only one attending. I sure wouldn't. When I throw a party, it is the more the merrier, but I wouldn't care if it is a few less...

 

[Wishing on a star]

if you were the mom, would you be offended if a guest chose a hockey class over the birthday?

It is not a choice (as in 'I don't wanna go...') It is a prior commitment, booked and paid for... Team sports are usually considered as a commitment and obligation. I agree with the above poster, NO specific personal excuse is warranted.

Also, the invitation was issued... The more the merrier... If the mother decided to be offended... then that is her issue. I don't think she would have any basis to be offended!!! However, if she were, just remember that for future reference as you decide how to deal with her re: these kinds of things.