What to do when touring styles are very different?

[Tigger&Belle]

What do you all do when you and your spouses/partners/friends tourning styles are very different.

I suppose the obvious answer is to compromise, but I'm looking for more details.

I'm going to WDW soon with my DH. We've never gone alone without children, so I don't really know how it will be. However, I tend to be more of a go-go-go type person. I'm happy eating something in the room for breakfast, maybe bringing snacks with me for lunch or at least the mid-morning munchies and maybe having one nice meal a day. He's the type that likes his meals, doesn't like to rush, and would be happy taking a break every day. Problem is, we're not going to be there long (can't leave the kids for long) and if we went on his schedule he wouldn't see much. He has no interest in going to WDW often (like I do) so it's not as if he'll just see the things he missed on his next trip. That may be years from now.

The compromises that I've made have been more sit-down meals, going out to breakfast a time or two, no early entry since we'll be staying up later at night, and planning what he'd like to do. We'll be going to Pleasure Island and Cirque, and it will be fun doing some things that we've never done with kids.

I really don't anticipate any major problems since I'm really trying to relax and change my touring style for this trip (I have 2 more trips in the works, so will get to do and see everything on those trips). Also, since my DH hasn't been in a few years he will probably be willing to spend longer days at the parks.

Just wondering how you all handle the different touring styles.

T&B

 

[ErinInCT]

My dh is a fly by the seat of his pants kind of guy while I spend months planning with Excel spreadsheets, etc. Luckily he is pretty good about letting me plan & he just shows up & I tell him where to go! He usually is happy that I did the work to plan otherwise we wouldn't get as much done/see as much as we can. This time he just asked me to please not pressure everyone to adhere to my schedule so I will try to have an agenda with the times of shows/etc, but also allow for the kids to go on a ride more then once or take time to meet characters & pin trade! We'll see how it goes. I am the type who gets very disappointed if things don't go exactly the way I plan! So it better be sunny, high 70's every day, no one in line, kids never need to go potty, etc!!!

 

[clkelley]

When me & hubby went solo on our anniversary trip in 2000, I went TOTALLY against my nature.

We didn't leave the room till 11am, had a good meal shortly after arriving in the parks, only did 2-3 attractions per day, had big fancy dinners every night, then stayed out late at PI every night.

We usually get up at the crack of dawn, grab a bagel and banana and are there for early entry, then we go for a late breakfast buffet at a resort, then hang out at a resort lounge or near the lake for our "break".

Then we're back to the parks, have another buffet at the last lunch seating, then close down the park. We usually only have one PI night on our family trips.

Carol

 

[lovesdisney44]

ErinInCt - I can totally relate! My husband is a very mellow kinda guy and as far as Disney is concerned, he lets me do all the planning

I always ask what he wants to do and he say "whatever you want to do is fine". How great is that?! He may want to do one or two rides, or see a special parade, but otherwise . . .

He does like his food, though. So, to make up for his letting me do what I want, I make sure we have plenty of extra $ for food treats for him I save all my change just to take care of food expenses for our trips for Me, DH, DS (16 - eats like a pig) and DD (12).

 

[CaseyJr]

Tigger&Belle, it sounds like you have a good plan worked out: fun with a little something for both of you. Be sure to post back your results.

My DH likes WDW, but in small and infrequent doses. I could go twice a year. While I plan a lot, it's mostly RESEARCH planning, more so than a minute-by-minute schedule. We have a DS who is 9. DS & I have fun together on our solo trips because I will do the spontaneous things that kids like to do, where DH wants to do mostly things that interest HIM.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

Erin, talk about complete opposites! lol Glad your DH is a good sport and doesn't mind your planning. Mine does see how my planning helps us to do what we want to do and knows that I have really thought things through which makes a dfference for the vacation.

I used to plan more minute by minute, but that's when I wasn't as familiar with the parks, didn't know which rides should be done first thing in the day, etc.


Clkelley, I'm very impressed that you were able to change your ways that much for your solo trip with your DH! I don't know that I could do it as well as you did, but I'm going to try and keep my hyper nature in check.

Lovesdisney44, my DH is very much the same, a go with the flow kind of guy (not always, but on a vacation), but I know that if he were doing things on his own it wouldn't be the smae as what I would plan.

CaseyJr, my DH grew up down the street from Disneyland and I think he just doesn't see Disney as something special. He grew up with the attitude from his mother that it wasn't anything to go to multiple times and she sure doesn't understand me going to WDW so often (I haven't even been that many times).

Like you, I research, read, and get very into the planning, but I don't do a minute-by-minute plan. I figure out what parks we'll go to, make some priority seatings, plan some special things to do (besides Cirque and Pleasure Island, we're going to MNSSHP and doing the Segway Tour). I'e been enough times to know what to do first, or sometimes I jot some notes so I remember what general plan I want to have.

I have another trip in early December with my 4yo, my sister, and my 81yo mother. That will be an interesting trip because my sister and I will have to be very careful not to overdo it with our mom (it will be our mom's first trip to WDW).

Then the end of January I'm bringing my 11yo. He hasn't been in over 3 years and we'll push ourselves to see and do everything and have a blast.

Three VERY different trips for sure!

T&B

 

[seashoreCM]

Can you do all the things on your Excel spreadsheet without having to work up a sweat getting from one to the next?

If not, mark off some of the things as low priority so they can be skipped if you fall behind schedule.

WHen multiple families or extended families get into disputes over touring style, it is time to go your separate ways and meet up somplace for dinner if you wish.

Disney hints:
http://members.aol.com/ajaynejr/disney.htm

 

[Leota]

DH has a very different touring style than DS & I. He is slower, more laid-back & likes to stop for coffee, snacks etc....
He only goes with us every 3 years or so - the other times, DS & I go it alone.
The last time we went, DS was old enough to leave alone at the resort for awhile, while DH & I walked over to the F&WF & watched Tapestry. It was really nice to just wander & sit & people watch. I think I would enjoy a trip , just the 2 of us. But the 3 of us is too hard to make everyone happy..... We still try. I think DH would "get the Magic" more on a more laid-back trip....

 

[popeyeohoh]

Sounds to me like you have this in hand. I picture the two of you snuggling in your booth at dinner, holding hands at cirque, dancing cheek to cheek at Pleasure Island. Late mornings in your room with room service for breakfast, enjoying the sights and sounds a fast pace touring style would overlook.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

Originally posted by popeyeohoh
Sounds to me like you have this in hand. I picture the two of you snuggling in your booth at dinner, holding hands at cirque, dancing cheek to cheek at Pleasure Island. Late mornings in your room with room service for breakfast, enjoying the sights and sounds a fast pace touring style would overlook.

LOL! I won't show my DH your post or he'll get his hopes up! I will do my best, however. A relaxing morning would probably be beyond me, but think that I can handle a break before doing our evening activities.

Leota, very different dynamics between a couple that a family for sure. With our 4 kids of different ages it's hard to make everyone happy all the time. A lot of compromise goes on, along with too much complaining.

The funny thing about my DH being more laid back is that at home it's the opposite. He was home with our boys all day today while I went on a college visit with our DD. He got SO much done here. He would have done even more if the power hadn't of gone out this afternoon for a couple hours. If it had of been me home, instead, I would have paced myself with the chores and cleaning more than he did. I'm not complaining, though!

T&B