What do you say when the dreaded "Santa isn't real ?" statement ?

[pandora174]

I've been dreading it but it happened today. DS (7) just totally busted me (he found all his gifts wrapped) in our garage's storage unit that we forgot to lock last night after I finished wrapping.

DS told me point blank, he saw the gifts & Santa isn't real (while we were watching my favorite Christmas movie Polar Express). He was totally ok with it. He said I know it was you mom, I saw you on the computer all the time & Dad would rush to meet the UPS/USPS/Fed Ex & was always in the garage, or you would tell Dad to get something your trunk Tell me about an observant child here...

Oh well...do you remember what time your kids found out & how you handled it ? I hope I did ok. I think DS handled it well & has been trying to figure it out lately since I was getting a lot of questions like "if it's Jesus b-day why does Santa give me presents & not Jesus " or "why does Santa give me so many presents but we give to kids that have none, why doesn't Santa go to their house ?"

So after his "No Santa" statement, I took a deep breath & just said what came out of my head. I told him a little about the rea/original St. Nicholaus (what I could recall) & that the Santa he sees everywhere is the spirit of the holidays. Like giving to others but that it's important b/c it makes us remember that. Also went back to enjoying the fun, lights, the tree, all the holiday music & movies, the fun of picking up presents for family & friends & of course it all comes down (for our family) the celebration of Jesus b-day. He said OK & is currently still watching Polar Express.

DH is still looking at me in shock that DS took it so well the Santa thing. We both were traumatized as kids.

 

[minkydog]

I think you handled it beautifully. My oldest came home from kindergarten with the news that a classmate's MOTHER had told the class they shouldn't believe in Santa because "Jesus is the reason for the season." Now we're Christians but I thought she was waaaaaay outta line. We talked about it and DS decided that mom was full of ****. However, the next year he did start putting out feelers and by age 7 he was pretty sure. When he asked me about it I came clean and he said, "So. You've basically been lying to me?" Ugh. I explained pretty much how you did, St. Nicholas, Christmas traditions, the Magi, Jesus, and the holiday feelings of gladness, peace, and good news. And he was fine with that. I don't even remember how DD learned the truth. It must have not been too traumatic.

 

[merryweather20]

VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except [what] they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if they did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.

You may tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.

If the New York Sun would print it, he must exist. I don't think I ever came to my parents traumatized. I remember learning about the source of the tradition in school and between the NY sun and Miracle on 34th street came to the conclusion it was more about fun, family, community and tradition, then by the book accuracy. Driving home from my grandparents on Crstmas Eve my brother and I would still try to find Rudolph in the sky even in High School. Our parents must have thought we were nuts.

I think what you said was really good

 

[JodyLynC]

VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except [what] they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if they did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.

You may tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.

If the New York Sun would print it, he must exist.

 

[DWGal210]

I've been dreading it but it happened today. DS (7) just totally busted me (he found all his gifts wrapped) in our garage's storage unit that we forgot to lock last night after I finished wrapping.

DS told me point blank, he saw the gifts & Santa isn't real (while we were watching my favorite Christmas movie Polar Express). He was totally ok with it. He said I know it was you mom, I saw you on the computer all the time & Dad would rush to meet the UPS/USPS/Fed Ex & was always in the garage, or you would tell Dad to get something your trunk Tell me about an observant child here...

Oh well...do you remember what time your kids found out & how you handled it ? I hope I did ok. I think DS handled it well & has been trying to figure it out lately since I was getting a lot of questions like "if it's Jesus b-day why does Santa give me presents & not Jesus " or "why does Santa give me so many presents but we give to kids that have none, why doesn't Santa go to their house ?"

So after his "No Santa" statement, I took a deep breath & just said what came out of my head. I told him a little about the rea/original St. Nicholaus (what I could recall) & that the Santa he sees everywhere is the spirit of the holidays. Like giving to others but that it's important b/c it makes us remember that. Also went back to enjoying the fun, lights, the tree, all the holiday music & movies, the fun of picking up presents for family & friends & of course it all comes down (for our family) the celebration of Jesus b-day. He said OK & is currently still watching Polar Express.

DH is still looking at me in shock that DS took it so well the Santa thing. We both were traumatized as kids.

You did a great job. I remember my parents telling me something along those lines when I asked. You handled it very well.

 

[happygirl]

VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except [what] they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if they did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.

You may tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.

If the New York Sun would print it, he must exist. I don't think I ever came to my parents traumatized. I remember learning about the source of the tradition in school and between the NY sun and Miracle on 34th street came to the conclusion it was more about fun, family, community and tradition, then by the book accuracy. Driving home from my grandparents on Crstmas Eve my brother and I would still try to find Rudolph in the sky even in High School. Our parents must have thought we were nuts.

I think what you said was really good

excellent

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

My oldest pretty much knows but is going back and forth to totally admitting it or not. (One day it is "I know its you" and the next is "He has to be real".)

We've never made such a big deal about it. Santa is a present force--but I don't take them to see him unless they ask, we've never done the writing letters to Santa bit. And our presents do not say "From santa"--though they are wrapped in different wrapping and come with Santa themed labels.

When I found out--I was 3rd grade and my world did not come crashing down. I will say that my mom did respond to one inquiry that if we didn't believe, we may have less presents. So we "played along".

I think that as long as it isn't made into this big spectacle, all will be fine.

We do talk about the Spirit as well and as far as I know--the gift giving that we do today did originate from a real person.