What do you do when your 2 y/o has a....

[Mishetta]

big temper tantrum???? Knocking things over & stomping his feet & he even kicked me when I approached him!! I want to calm him & yet, I'm getting angry myself!!! HELP!!!!

 

[Lisa L from MI]

my now 8 year old DD used to have major tantrums.....and still sometimes does....but, my pediatrician told me to ignore it...walk away.......it was hard to do at first....but I think that it really worked and the tantrums that she did throw weren't near as long as they were when I would try to calm her

 

[JetMom]

As a 15 year preschool teacher and 11 year mother -- I agree. the best way to stop a tantrum is to take away the audience.

In my classroom, I have been known to have my teaching assistant take the rest of the class out to the playground. I will sit in a corner and "read" a book or magazine until the child realizes that the tantrum is not fazing anyone.

In my home, I leave the room or put the child in their room and tell them to come and get me when they are finished yelling.

This strategy tends to work most of the time.

 

[TINKTWINS]

Sorry cant relate, my kids are perfect.


OK OK never mind, well if your at home put him in his room and walk away. Should calm after a few mins.

In swear its just in thier own makeup, I have 5 kids, 4 DS's and 1 DD, the youngest are 4yo boy/girls twins. All my sons had that temper, she never pulls one. It gets easier, the terrible 2's do exist. Just wait till the teenage years

 

[Alice28]

Here's another daycare vet and mom to two boys, one of whom is 2 and prince of the temper tantrums....I ignore it. Unless we're in a store, then I pick him up and leave. I leave the room or put him in his crib so he won't hurt anything (he likes to throw stuff). When he's done I go in (or worked himself into complete hysterics) and give him a hug and then he seems fine. It's very strange....my 6 year old was quite mellow when he was two (occasional fit, but not bad)...I am getting it ("terrible twos") in spades with #2.

 

[huey duey & luey]

I ignore it also. I usually put them in the other room, and tell them that when they are done then they can come back and play with us. They do usually continue foe a little while but I have noticed when I go back in to get them they usually stop. Just look at the bright side you can have tantrums X3
Tara

 

[mickeyboat]

I agree, ignore it. DD3 used to have horrible tantrums. I even spoke to her doctor about it. She was overwhelmed with a particular situation and did not know how to verbalize how she was feeling (usually anger). That was of no comfort when she screamed for 30 minutes and wouldn't let me get near her. I would just make the environment as safe as possible for her and ignore her until she stopped. Easier said than done. But she has outgrown it, thank goodness. Your DS will too.

Good luck!

Denae

 

[DisneyJules]

When it comes to kicking or throwing things, he definitely needs to be told that that is not acceptible, I know he's young, but kids are SO smart from a very young age and catch on real quick. I'd say bring him to his room and tell him that when he's ready to behave, he can come out. Good-luck, you'll survive the terrible 2s

 

[GlennandAnn]

Ignore it. Your child's goal is getting your attention. Kids will do whatever they feel is necessary to get parents' attention. If you don't play the game, they learn fairly quickly that tantrums don't work. I know it's hard, but it is the best way to deal with it. My older DS had a few wicked tantrums in his day, and the ignoring really did help. I practiced deep breathing and I learned not to react.
I am a child development specialist and teach parenting classes for a living. I know from experience that it's hard, but I think that might be the only way to deal with it. Good luck.

Ann

 

[BrerMom]

If he's frustrated because of language difficulties, ignoring him may not help. It didn't in our case. When DS would get that wound up, I'd sit on the floor with his back on my stomach and just hug him until he calmed down. When his body relaxed, he'd just sob and sob. DS stopped having the tantrums so frequently when he could understand more of what was being said and we could understand what he was trying to say about half of the time. Hang in there. I remember that stage very, very well.

 

[Mishetta]

Ahhh....not thinking today....of course!!! He's upset because I don't understand him!! He's 28 months old & just says a handful of words. (He's in speech & occupational therapy right now.) He was probably upset that I didn't understand something. Anyway, it passed this time, but I've never seen him SO upset like that. He was so violent!

He's been sick for nearly 2 weeks & couped up in the house but still, I just can't believe the way he acted. He looked like he was possessed!!

Thanks for all your support. If anyone can think of anymore solutions (in case we have another "episode") please share your suggestions with me!!

 

[mudnuri]

I agree with the others to ignore it, however I do not believe you should leave a store with a child who is throwing a tantrum. Luckily for me, DD's have never thrown a tantrum...they are now 6 and 7, and it's just not in their make up. Both are easy going etc... however they have gotten whiney in a store, and I simply ignored it, and it went away...I guess its hard if your in a store, you dont want them causing a big scene, however they are getting there way if you leave the store...

just my .02

Brandy

 

[my3kids]

Bump

 

[Pembo]

Another vote for ignore.

That said, oldest ds was the tantrum king! The only way to calm him was to hold him. I learned to get him on my lap and restrain him until he could calm down.

The 2's are hard because they can't communicate, the 3's are worse because they can. You'll understand that when you get there.....

Good luck..........dd is 18 mo and the tantrums are just beginning...

 

[*Fantasia*]

Sometimes ignoring doesn't do it.

 

[Toby'sFriend]

I remember that stage with my language delayed son as well.

I can remember many times just sitting on the floor hugging my kid repeating --- "You have to tell me in words.....You have to quit screaming and tell me in words....."

sigh.

He did eventually learn to show me many things - pointing at the refrigerator for food or actually pulling the bottle of juice out himself. But it took a very long time.

 

[swea_pea1]

DS is 2 and I have the same problem. Sometimes I can stop him if I get it early enough. When he just starts to whine, I'll say "do you want to go to bed?" He, of course says "NO!" (his only word that it clearly articulated) and I tell him that if he continues that's where he'll go.

If I don't catch him early enough, then I'm with the other "ignorers". The only thing I have to add is a trick that my pediatrician told me about that I used with DD(4) and it worked pretty well. When he's all done with the tantrum and calmed down, I make a big deal about him coming back to his senses. Overdramatically, I'll say "wow, it's great to see you back to your old self again!" or "I'm glad that's over so we can enjoy Nemo together!", or whatever. I try to make it so it's more fun to remain in control.

Good luck to ya. I know that the 2's seem to last far longer than a year, but you will get through!

 

[TINKTWINS]

You know now that I think of it you may have hit the nail on the head, when my twins were twoish, the winter was very stressfull, we didnt go out much because it was to hard to take out 2 two yo's, but once the weather warmed and I could get them out even for a little bit, it helped. Not feeling well will do it. The only time DD crys is when she is over tired and over stimulated. But please dont think my lucky, I have an almost 18yo who whines in her place!!

 

[Pop Daddy]

spank him

 

[browneyes]

Make him laugh.