What do you do about Teens & Credit Cards?

[grumpeeduck]

Ever since dd has had a part time job, she has had a checking a/c with a DEBIT card. She manages is well, and balances every month. We have taught her about good money skills. A big NO to having her own credit card! There is no need for a teen/college student to have one. She needs to live within her means-big life lesson there. When she is out of college, she can get a credit card, but for now we are keeping her credit rating very safe! I know of far too many adults that have credit problems now and never learned to SAVE and PLAN. So teach them the right way now, and then they will follow your lead!

 

[C.Ann]

Two things that jumped out of OP's post. You can't trust her to give you back your change, but you're willing to trust her with a credit card? Also, your gas stations don't accept cash?

That was my first thought as well..

OH it isn't that my DD isn't trustworthy....she is forgetful and disorganized. .

If she's that disorganized that she can't even get your change back to you, why would you want her to be walking around with a credit card?

Whatever you decide, I hope it works out for the best..

 

[westjones]

Ever since dd has had a part time job, she has had a checking a/c with a DEBIT card. She manages is well, and balances every month. We have taught her about good money skills. A big NO to having her own credit card! There is no need for a teen/college student to have one. She needs to live within her means-big life lesson there. When she is out of college, she can get a credit card, but for now we are keeping her credit rating very safe! I know of far too many adults that have credit problems now and never learned to SAVE and PLAN. So teach them the right way now, and then they will follow your lead!

Oh when she gets her first job, I want to do this too. Right now I just want a way for her to go to the store for me and buy stuff I want her to buy (so that doesn't come out of her money).

Maybe next summer she will get a job, and if she does, we will do the whole debit card thing also and she will have to track it. Right now she has no money (except what I give her when she does chores for me around the house). So there isn't much to keep track of. But later, this is a great idea!

 

[LindaR]

Westjones, this will TEACH her responsibility. You explain, she does. When she forgets or loses a receipt then she needs to have a consequence and you enforce that consequence. That's "teaching" her to be responsible, not excusing her.

I know teens have a billion things on their minds (school, opposite sex, the color of the sky....) but at some point they need to force themselves to pull their heads out.....

Practice makes perfect!

 

[The Mystery Machine]

We got my dd her own debit card and that was not an easy task. Most places will not allow that until they are 18.

She was traveling out of state for various things and we wanted her to have a card in her name so there was no question about use if she needed it.

Frankly having your child manage their own card and money is a good thing. If they "go wild" and break rules they are not going to be in a position to go out anywhere, let alone drive in this house. She did lose it once and we canceled the card, easy fix.

She is 18 now and a freshman in college and manages her account.

 

[westjones]

That was my first thought as well..



If she's that disorganized that she can't even get your change back to you, why would you want her to be walking around with a credit card?

Whatever you decide, I hope it works out for the best..

Because I want her to go to the store for me so I don't have to!
This is our first week of all of this (she just started solo driving last Saturday), so she isn't used to running errands for me, and she does give me back my change once I remind her, but we are trying to find a 'simple' way to handle this. Honestly, I use my credit card for my errands, and I am not used to having a lot of cash on hand, so when I send her to the store I have to look for money to give her and frankly handing her a card just seems easier and when she gets back, I just take the card back. I wouldn't let her keep it. I am not ready to trust her THAT much yet, I watch my charges online several times a week, so I can keep an eye on what is going on.

I really just want to simplify my life! Things are just so complicated anymore! UGH!

 

[Pooh Crew]

When DS started driving we opened a student checking account that was linked to mine. It was very convenient I could transfer from my account to his and he had a debit card to use. He used that account through college again very easy for me to see if he needed money and transfer.

That's exactly what we did for our daughter. She used that account for years and it accomplished exactly what we needed for her. She had her own debit card that was linked to our acount, but could not "drain" our account. It taught her to be fiscally responsible, but also gave her a safety net by giving us the ability to check the balance. I would not give a teen a credit card.

 

[mamacatnv]

I ordered a Visa in my sons name from my Disney Visa account - piece of cake. He carries it at all times and he knows the rules. What is nice is I can call and say hey, could you pick up milk on your way home and I don't have to worry about paying him back or he could put gas in his car etc. I pay off the balance every month.

Now that he is in college, he'll ask for new jeans or such and again, I allow him to use the card as needed and "pre-approved".

Other than that, the rules are, it is for emergency purposes only and since he is now in college I extended the definition of emergency to include cab fare if needed but not bail money

 

[westjones]

I ordered a Visa in my sons name from my Disney Visa account - piece of cake. He carries it at all times and he knows the rules. What is nice is I can call and say hey, could you pick up milk on your way home and I don't have to worry about paying him back or he could put gas in his car etc. I pay off the balance every month.

Now that he is in college, he'll ask for new jeans or such and again, I allow him to use the card as needed and "pre-approved".

Other than that, the rules are, it is for emergency purposes only and since he is now in college I extended the definition of emergency to include cab fare if needed but not bail money

That sounds good.....and when she is older, I may let her carry it with her, but right now, she is just not ready (she loses her purse and cell phone too often.....never to where it is totally lost, we find it within an hour or so, last time it is in the blankets on her bed! ), but when she is 18 maybe, if she is seeming more responsible, I would consider doing this also....with the whole "pre-approved" thing as well!

 

[golfgal]

Our bank has a teen checking account that is really just a debit card. DS17 has had his for 3 1/2 years, our twins just got one a few months ago. Originally DS17 was for his trip to China, now it is for what you want, getting gas, groceries, etc. He keeps "his" money and "our" money in his account and has to keep a separate register, with receipts, for any of "our" money he uses otherwise it comes out of "his" money.

I got the twins cards so I didn't have to go into Hollister, American Eagle, etc. and lose what is left of my hearing.

edit--we never got change back either but all of the kids have been VERY responsible with their debit cards.

 

[scrapquitler]

I think that I would call the credit card company and get a card with her name on it (as an authorized user), and then give her STRICT guidelines about when she is and is not allowed to use it. Alternately, get a custodial checking account with a debit card and have her use that card, again with STRICT rules about how it is to be used.

I remember when I was a new driver and becoming more independent. At one point, Mom sent me to the mall (to G.Fox for anyone in CT who remembers that) with a handwritten note stating "Tracey xxxx is my daughter, and I am authorizing her to use my charge card today to purchase clothes" and she signed it...and they had NO PROBLEM with that! LOL.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

I think that I would call the credit card company and get a card with her name on it (as an authorized user), and then give her STRICT guidelines about when she is and is not allowed to use it. Alternately, get a custodial checking account with a debit card and have her use that card, again with STRICT rules about how it is to be used.

I remember when I was a new driver and becoming more independent. At one point, Mom sent me to the mall (to G.Fox for anyone in CT who remembers that) with a handwritten note stating "Tracey xxxx is my daughter, and I am authorizing her to use my charge card today to purchase clothes" and she signed it...and they had NO PROBLEM with that! LOL.

Ah yes, times have changed. Tried to use my DH's credit card in Walmart once, and they were giving me such a hard time. I was with my MIL and she kept saying, "but he's my son, I know it's okay." Then my daughter started in with "my daddy said it was okay for mommy to use the card". That poor girl just wanted me out of the store, so she gave in.

I also remember being sent to the store as a 6 year old to buy cigarettes for my mom.

 

[dawson5]

can you ask for there to be a limit to the amount charged per day also? I know our debit/charge to our checking is limited per day.

 

[agnes!]

I started a long time ago, back in the olden days when I used to pay cash at the grocery store (yeah, I now use a cc all the time)... I would ask my DD "The bill was $$, I gave the cashier $. How much should my change be?" and if she got it right, she got to keep the change.

Not the same as a teen and a credit card, but still...taught her how to add/subtract in her head .

agnes!

 

[Disney Doll]

OK......you guys have been great! Thanks! I just got off the phone about our Disney VISA and I am getting one added to my account in her name.

I like the idea of me keeping it and ONLY giving it to her when I want her to use it and she has to turn in receipts to me. That way I can keep track.

If it seems like there is a problem, I will take her off of the account, but for now, I want to give this a try. I can go on line daily and look at charges, that that helps.

Like I said, she is a good kid. She has never done anything to break my trust (except she is forgetful and a bit of an air head at times). She even asks before taking a quarter out of our change dish. So really the issue with her is forming a 'habit' of keeping track of the card and receipt.

Thanks again everyone!
Debra

I'd have a good, but forgetful and airheaded kid, form a "habit" of learning to remember to give me my change back before I'd give her access to my credit.

 

[MrsPete]

One of the best things my mom ever did for me:

Summer before my senior year of high school she took me down to the bank and helped me get a checking account of my own. I wouldn't have considered this myself; none of my friends had accounts, and I was perfectly happy to use cash everywhere. For that last year that I was "hers", she made me balance the checkbook every month with her. It didn't take me long to understand how to manage a checking account, and when I went away to college the next year I didn't bounce checks like many kids did.

I intend to do the same thing for my daughters, though credit card education is also necessary these days; so I'll get them both a checking account and and credit card, and I'll make sure they know how to use them while they still live under my roof. I think a general-use card (like a VISA) with a low, low limit is a good starting point. Then, when they head off to college, we'll up the limit a little so they can take care of buying books or paying for an emergency car repair.

HOWEVER, I do agree with other posters who say that a child who's "forgetful and disorganized" may not be ready for this responsibility. If she looses them, she (and you) could face serious identity theft problems for years to come. Somehow I have the impression that you're softening irresponsibility and immaturity into something that sounds more acceptable. Only you know about this, but -- if it is true -- you're not doing her any favors.

Do not make these decisions for your own convenience. Having a bag of groceries delivered to your house isn't worth the trouble that you'll face IF she is irresponsible with these adult-issues.

I frequently adhere to the concept of "Never give a child anything he's willing to earn". Let her EARN the priviledge of having a card. Talk to her about what you expect her to do -- be specific. What are her forgetful and disorganized behaviors? Tell her that once you've seen them disappear, she can have a card. Let her have the fun of being forced to go in and pay cash for her gas for a while -- she'll understand that a credit card is a nice luxury. THEN, once she's earned it, THEN give it to her. With strings attached. If she reverts to forgetful and disorganized behaviors, she loses it.

 

[jme829]

I use my debit card for everything (gas too) so if I need something, I just give my card to dd...At the store she just uses it as debit and uses my pin, if shes at the gas station, she just runs it as credit thru pay at the pump..no signature needed.

I trust her and she has never abused it. If she is out doing an errand for me and needs something for her self , she sends me a text to ask if she can get it.

 

[rie'smom]

My teen and a credit card = no way.

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

My parents got me my own American Express card at age 16. I used it to travel Europe and for spring breaks.

All charges would be on my parents bill. That forced me to not go overboard.

It helped immensely in getting credit as I was older! Since it looked like I had "existing" accounts, I was never turned down in getting other cards. Plus I had a great credit score - since the age of the account was how long my parents had the account.

 

[PatsMom]

My DD opened a joint checking account with me. I had to be a joint owner since she was not 18 at the time. The debit card had only her name on it. While in high school, she deposited her paychecks and any other odd money that came her way at birthday's, etc. If I asked her to pick up something for me, she kept a tally of what I "owed" her and I would add it to the amount I deposited for her weekly allowance.

We agreed on some rules for money. My weekly deposits were enough money to cover school lunches, gas (once she was driving to and from school), and some spending money such as movies or grocery store stops for things that had to come out of her budget like energy drinks! I bought her basic clothing - if she wanted a fancy coat and I was only willing to spend half the money, she had to cough up the rest out of her share.

She is very responsible with her money now and we continue to have the joint account. She is away at college and if something happened and she needed money I could have it transferred instantly to her account. Now that she is in college, I expect her to earn/deposit enough to pay her books and day to day living expenses (tea at the bagel shop, grocery store runs, etc). We pay tuition. Allowance stopped on her 18th birthday.

I would worry about a airhead who can't remember receipts and change and loses her cell phone having access to my credit card! I hope things work out for you. Having your child drive is a mixed blessing at best - new things to worry about but also very convenient!