What did your graduate gift other graduates?

[wendow]

Sorry if that is confusing...I'm wanting to figure out...I have a child graduating high school and she has a ton of friends, various degrees of friends, but still they are her friends. How/What do we gift these kids?

The first of about 20 parties we are invited to is on Thursday (tomorrow night). This is a level 3 friend.

Level 3 friend - know her and like her a lot but not super close.

Level 2 friend - gets together some outside of classes but not BFF's.

Level 1 friend is BFF - We have 5 of those parties and gifts to give.

Any advice is super appreciated!

 

[barkley]

when dd graduated the grads didn't so much gift the other grads as much as their parents might (depending on the closeness of the relationships). there were some parties where it was largely only the close friends of the grads in which case gifts were brought (again usually provided by the parents) but when they were going to one of those where everybody (or close to) in the graduating class was invited then it was at most just a card.

while my dd appreciated the checks/gift cards she received-she was honestly more touched by the gifts from close friends that were somewhat personal in nature. one friend gave her a photo of the two of them in a nice frame, another a set of kitchen utensils and the promise of coming to visit her and make a big batch of their favorite cookies. another made each of her close friends simple fleece lap blankets in colors she knew the friends liked-she wrote a sweet note to each that if when they were away at school they got to feeling lonely and missing each other that they were to wrap up in that blanket and feel the love they all still shared for one another

 

[QueenIsabella]

My kids didn't do this, but if they wanted to, I would encourage something small and simple and easily duplicated. You know, maybe a Yeti-knockoff cup filled with Kisses, that kind of thing. (they sell cheaper cups at Walmart). If she's crafty, she could decorate each one for the individual friend. There are a ton of ideas on Pinterest for making glitter cups, vinyl stick-ons, and so forth.

A nice note saying why that friend is special and has made HS fun would be good, too.

 

[kymom99]

My son's one close friend gave him a tervis for the college he is going to. The rest gave him cash. We gave cash to 3 kids and a gift card to guitar center to another. The rest of the parties he went to he just showed up. No gifts. Girls may be different.

 

[McKelly]

My daughter purchased canisters with grad caps on top (Hallmark) and gave them to her semi-close friends. She went to some parties and didn't bring anything. To be honest, I don't know if she gave her three closest friends anything. Our entire family was invited to the party so we gave cash. She probably just figured that was from her too! But she might have, and I just didn't notice. They all equally acknowledged how broke they were, or were going to be, so I'm guessing they went the no gift route!

 

[wendow]

These ideas are great .Thank you all! I'll share these with her later today.

 

[elgerber]

My kids did not gift other kids. I did give college stuff gift bags to her 6 close friends myself, clip on light, laundry soap, snacks, etc. But my dd didn't give them anything herself, and she didn't get anything from her friends either.

 

[Psychodisney]

If my kids were invited to their friend's parties, they brought nothing. If we were invited, we gave cash or gift cards.

 

[familyfirsttimer]

Sorry if that is confusing...I'm wanting to figure out...I have a child graduating high school and she has a ton of friends, various degrees of friends, but still they are her friends. How/What do we gift these kids?

My daughter and her friends/teammates all talked way before party season and said no gifts. They all showed up without anything for each other and got to enjoy more parties than they would have if gifts needed. We had a few that were more like family friends that we gave a $$ gift to, from our family.

Good luck

 

[scrapquitler]

When my daughter graduated, she didn't give gifts to any of the friends whose party she attended, and she didnt get any gifts, either. The kids all gave (or made) cards for each other, that was it.

 

[wendow]

When my daughter graduated, she didn't give gifts to any of the friends whose party she attended, and she didnt get any gifts, either. The kids all gave (or made) cards for each other, that was it.

Did everyone discuss this ahead of time, or just how it all happened? I would really prefer to give (or get) a sweet, thoughtful note rather than gifts (my dd would feel the same).

 

[2TxAgs]

Our kids invited about a dozen friends over for a 'close friend' party. I bought the ceramic soup bowls with lids (google them) in different colors. I also bought soups, small bags of cereals, oatmeal, tea bags, hot chocolate boxes, etc (things that could be eaten or drank out of the mugs). I told the kids to pick a mug and a couple of the things to use with it - take them to college and use as needed. A couple years after the parties, some of the kids would tell me that they were getting a lot of use out of their mugs. Useful and inexpensive gifts. I don't believe my kids took anything to parties of their friends...these were just given to the ones who were close and came to our house for a small, close group celebration.

 

[kuhltiffany]

$20.18

 

[mousehockey37]

Outside of your own kid, I really wouldn't do anything (sounds cruel, but hey, you're looking at 20ish parties here), otherwise it can get expensive quick.

If you're wanting to do something for a really close knit group of BFF's... you say there's 5, how close are all of them, do you know all their parents? If so, maybe work with the other parents to try and get a spa day or something where you each send your own kid, but they all go together as a group.

ETA: Just thinking here, but the last thing you would want to do is create animosity via gift giving at other parties. What I mean is... You don't know who is being invited to these other events. The last thing you would want is to give Level 1 friend a gift valued at X amount and having other lesser friend or a non-friend getting nothing and having it potentially come back on you through parents later. This is another reason why I say just skip giving things. As a poster just mentioned, if they come to YOUR party, you can give them what you wish, but if you're going out, keep the gifts even or none at all.

 

[scrapquitler]

Did everyone discuss this ahead of time, or just how it all happened? I would really prefer to give (or get) a sweet, thoughtful note rather than gifts (my dd would feel the same).

I don't remember how it came about that way.

She graduates from college next week, and she and her friends are doing the same thing (I think they planned it last week) and they also all decided to skip graduation and go to NYC to see a show and go to dinner together instead.

 

[wendow]

Outside of your own kid, I really wouldn't do anything (sounds cruel, but hey, you're looking at 20ish parties here), otherwise it can get expensive quick.

If you're wanting to do something for a really close knit group of BFF's... you say there's 5, how close are all of them, do you know all their parents? If so, maybe work with the other parents to try and get a spa day or something where you each send your own kid, but they all go together as a group.

ETA: Just thinking here, but the last thing you would want to do is create animosity via gift giving at other parties. What I mean is... You don't know who is being invited to these other events. The last thing you would want is to give Level 1 friend a gift valued at X amount and having other lesser friend or a non-friend getting nothing and having it potentially come back on you through parents later. This is another reason why I say just skip giving things. As a poster just mentioned, if they come to YOUR party, you can give them what you wish, but if you're going out, keep the gifts even or none at all.

I know the BFF's parents very well and they are all friends with each other too so I like the spa day idea! These girls have all been close friends since K-2nd.

I don't want to create any animosity, nor break the bank trying to gift everyone equally. I love the idea of handwritten note cards for each and then something special for the besties.

Thanks!

 

[wendow]

She graduates from college next week, and she and her friends are doing the same thing (I think they planned it last week) and they also all decided to skip graduation and go to NYC to see a show and go to dinner together instead.

Love that! Sounds like something my dd and her friends would do

 

[mousehockey37]

I don't want to create any animosity, nor break the bank trying to gift everyone equally.

Yeah, even just something simple could create a ripple in the community. An example we had at my high school: When my sister graduated, there was this $10,000 "scholarship" that was to be awarded. Well, my parents looked at it and were like... Your sister didn't see that scholarship listed. Well, when the "scholarship" was to be given out, this little old lady comes out on stage, says a thing or two and calls her grandson up as the recipient. Talk about a community outrage, lol. This old lady went to a ton of trouble to give her grandson 10k in front of the whole town. Needless to say, I don't think the scholarship has resurfaced....

 

[HopperFan]

Kids chose the top 3-4 parties they wanted to go to ... and honestly there were so many and mostly at the same time/night/day that it would have been logistical nightmare to do more. They had two parties. One for family, family-friends and a few neighbors. One for their close friends and they only invited about 12, and no gifts were expected.

I don't remember DS but DD gave cards
with a $10 Starbuck's gift card
with a note "in case of emergency" ....

 

[wendow]

Kids chose the top 3-4 parties they wanted to go to ... and honestly there were so many and mostly at the same time/night/day that it would have been logistical nightmare to do more. They had two parties. One for family, family-friends and a few neighbors. One for their close friends and they only invited about 12, and no gifts were expected.

I don't remember DS but DD gave cards
with a $10 Starbuck's gift card
with a note "in case of emergency" ....

I like the Starbucks idea, that's cute!