Weirdest Kids Birthday Party ever!

[EllenFrasier]

It was my niece's son's birthday - he turned 11. She had a laser tag party outside - it's January in the Northeast. Anyway the kids all had on snow gear and they had fun for a couple hours playing laser tag outside. That part was fairly normal.
My niece recently signed divorce papers with her soon to be ex-husband. He was at the party! He was outside helping with the laser tag. His mom was inside in the family room. All the other adults were meandering around between one end of the house and the other. The reason for this is because my niece's boyfriend was in the living room which was at the other end of the house. So we had the ex-MIL in one room, the boyfriend in another room and the soon to be ex-husband outside with the kids. My niece had had a couple of mixed drinks - it was 2 in the afternoon. I guess she was feeling the stress or something. She wasn't drunk, but I don't drink so I can't see why someone would think to have an alcoholic beverage during a kids party.
It got more stressful when they kids all came inside for cake and the ex-husband came in too. He was video taping the party. The boyfriend stayed in the living room until they sang happy birthday and then he came out for that and went back to the living room.
I felt kind of bad for the boyfriend when they opened presents, the kids all came in the living room and the soon to be ex was taking video tape and standing right next to him! I guess my niece and the soon to be ex are not too nice to each other when people are not around. He is very angry and blames the boyfriend for the marriage ending even though he was not in the picture when the troubles started. Whether they would have worked things out or not will never be known.
All I know is next year, I'm dropping my kids off and leaving!

 

[Mermaid02]

It was my niece's son's birthday - he turned 11. She had a laser tag party outside - it's January in the Northeast. Anyway the kids all had on snow gear and they had fun for a couple hours playing laser tag outside. That part was fairly normal.
My niece recently signed divorce papers with her soon to be ex-husband. He was at the party! He was outside helping with the laser tag. His mom was inside in the family room. All the other adults were meandering around between one end of the house and the other. The reason for this is because my niece's boyfriend was in the living room which was at the other end of the house. So we had the ex-MIL in one room, the boyfriend in another room and the soon to be ex-husband outside with the kids. My niece had had a couple of mixed drinks - it was 2 in the afternoon. I guess she was feeling the stress or something. She wasn't drunk, but I don't drink so I can't see why someone would think to have an alcoholic beverage during a kids party.
It got more stressful when they kids all came inside for cake and the ex-husband came in too. He was video taping the party. The boyfriend stayed in the living room until they sang happy birthday and then he came out for that and went back to the living room.
I felt kind of bad for the boyfriend when they opened presents, the kids all came in the living room and the soon to be ex was taking video tape and standing right next to him! I guess my niece and the soon to be ex are not too nice to each other when people are not around. He is very angry and blames the boyfriend for the marriage ending even though he was not in the picture when the troubles started. Whether they would have worked things out or not will never be known.
All I know is next year, I'm dropping my kids off and leaving!

At least everyone was civil. I'd have probably asked my niece to mix me a drink too.

 

[TheIncredibles!]

I think it's wonderful that both parents were there for the child's birthday. Quite frankly if there was tension the boyfriend should have found something else to do for the day.

 

[Hannathy]

I think it was wonderful that they could all be adults and put their differences aside for 1 afternoon for the betterment of their son.

I applaud them.

And unless she had also planned an adult party at the same time, why didn't you just drop your child off and leave? That was probably what was adding to her stress all the extra adults walking around, I know it would have me.

 

[krcit]

Sounds like a typical party in my extended family. I think it's admirable when adults can put their differences aside for the sake of the children. Not even going to touch the drink thing because I've been on here long enough to know where that's going

 

[ozarkmom]

I'm thinking the boyfriend should have made other plans. I've been to parties where both parents attend even though they are divorced. When my stepson was little his mom and her family used to invite me to his birthday parties.

 

[allison443]

I think it's wonderful that both parents were there for the child's birthday. Quite frankly if there was tension the boyfriend should have found something else to do for the day.

I agree with this. Why did the boyfriend even need to be there (sounds like she just got officially divorced.)

OP you refer to them as the niece's ex husband and her ex mother in law. But they are still the birthday boy's dad and grandmother.

The situation does sound awkward though.

 

[MomRN]

I understand. In my family, when people divorced, that was it. My mom and dad never shared a party, there were aunts and uncles I never seen again, and I could not imagine having to constantly associating with my ex-husband (10+ years ago). That's my family.

My husbands family is very different. Exes go to birthday parties together and everyone is friendly and cordial. It was a very different experience for me. My FIL and step-FIL are always chit-chatting at parties.

It doesn't seem so odd now, but it weird at first. I kept expecting someone to pull out a baseball bat.

 

[rie'smom]

That isn't weird. My late ex and my husband called each other husband-in-law. They were always together at events for our son from my first marriage. Not every divorce is messy. Sometimes exes can act like adults and realize that the most important thing to remember is the child(ren)'s feelings.

 

[Hoodie]

I think it's great that both parents could put aside their differences for a day for their child's party.

If anything, the boyfriend shouldn't have been there at all. The divorce isn't final yet. That seems completely inappropriate.

 

[Liberty Belle]

I think it's wonderful that both parents were there for the child's birthday. Quite frankly if there was tension the boyfriend should have found something else to do for the day.

I agree. It sounds like a good party to me, other than people trying to avoid eachother.

 

[scottishduffy]

I think it is wonderful that everyone put aside some bitter feelings to come together for the party. Even though there is tension underneath, at least all the adults in the childs life acted civilly for a few hours worth of birthday party. I can see how it may be awkward but I would still admire it. They will have get used to that scenario!

Better than my DH's parents... our wedding was the first time the two of them had been in the same room in over 20 years. We were terrified of one of them causing a scene.

P.S I also would have asked for a cocktail!

 

[LilyWDW]

I agree with this. Why did the boyfriend even need to be there (sounds like she just got officially divorced.)

OP you refer to them as the niece's ex husband and her ex mother in law. But they are still the birthday boy's dad and grandmother.

The situation does sound awkward though.

Bolding mine...

THIS is what is important. These people should still be in the child's life! As such, they should be there to celebrate the child's birthday. I am very glad that they were able to put aside their differences and be there for this child.

I also agree with the PPs as to the idea that maybe the boyfriend should not have been there.

 

[NMAmy]

Doesn't sound weird to me at all. My sister's ex comes to all the family parties. They were married for over 20 years and I've known him since I was 9 so most of the time, it's not awkward.

My ex and I put on birthday parties for dd after our divorce. At dd's graduation party, I volunteered to sit and chat with my ex-IL's so my ex and his wife could circulate at the party. I used to think it would end when dd got married but now I know it will probably continue if she has kids. It's gotten much easier--my ex now feels like a relative I haven't been close to in a long time. We're polite and civil but we don't really have that much to talk about except dd.

 

[golfgal]

Sounds like mom and dad are doing a good job so far about remembering they have a child together and not to take their frustrations out on that child.

 

[momof1princess]

I think it's great that both parents could put aside their differences for a day for their child's party.

If anything, the boyfriend shouldn't have been there at all. The divorce isn't final yet. That seems completely inappropriate.

MTE!

 

[okeydokey]

Not sure what's so weird about it? They put the child first. Good for them.

 

[lacrosse_lady72]

It sounds like a very awkward situation, that's for sure. And weird of course, for you being there during the awkwardness. But I'm glad they're all collectively taking the child's feelings above their own for a few hours. I wish my parents would have done that. I've never seen my mom, my dad and my grandmother (dad's mom) in the same city together, let alone the same house.

 

[Eeyore'sthebest]

I think its nice they can do that without the drama. Good for their son.

 

[MrsJackSparrow4Life]

Sounds better than what some people in my family do. They hold separate parties, which wouldn't be so bad in and of itself, however they use these parties to one-up each other.

If one decides to have a pool party at the YMCA, the other throws their party at the local water park. If one buys their kid a DVD the other buys an entertainment center to play the DVD on. This goes on until the kid is old enough to figure out not to talk about what the other is doing (assuming the kid isn't enjoying the haul ).