Wedding Stress

[BrideToBe82]

I just got engaged a few weeks ago and it seems like EVERYONE has an opinion about OUR wedding. My fiance's mom think that August (even though it will be at night) will be too hot for a wedding...my bridesmaid wants me to move the wedding up so that her boyfriend can come...my mom wants to invite distant relatives who I have only met like once in my life. Ugh am I the only one going through this?

I absolutely love the idea of a disneyland wedding and I don't want to give up my dream wedding but it just seems so much easier to elope!!

 

[ead79]

No, you're not the only one! I don't really know why, but some people seem to think that wedding decisions are group decisions. Of course you should keep your family and friends in mind when planning your wedding, but you should also be true to what you and your DF want. It's tough to balance everyone's opinions, so sometimes you just have to make an executive decision and stick to your guns.

 

[disneybridetobe]

I just got engaged a few weeks ago and it seems like EVERYONE has an opinion about OUR wedding. My fiance's mom think that August (even though it will be at night) will be too hot for a wedding...my bridesmaid wants me to move the wedding up so that her boyfriend can come...my mom wants to invite distant relatives who I have only met like once in my life. Ugh am I the only one going through this?

I absolutely love the idea of a disneyland wedding and I don't want to give up my dream wedding but it just seems so much easier to elope!!

Omigod yeah! My mom has been freaking out this whole entire time!! It'll be too hot! EVERYONE will be looking at you to tell them what to do! Move the wedding so your cousins can come! Let's invite your aunt's sister in law because she lives in Orlando! (She did!!) Three bottles of champagne wont be enough for 16 people!! Order more!! These are just examples of what I'm going through. I thought planning an intimate wedding would be SIMPLE! haha!
Now, my mom is planning a SECOND reception where she lives... so I'm basically planning two weddings at once. Argh!

Good luck with your planning- it's YOUR wedding! Have fun! Do what *YOU* and your fiancee want to do!

 

[wendy46001]

Like the above posters said, everyone has an opinion....but do what you feel is right (it is your wedding)...talk to the people who are important to you and decide on a time....its not a open forum...
My friend actually asked me to move my wedding because her boyfriend had final four tickets...lol.....but in the end the one guest that i wanted there was my Older brother there (he fly’s for the navy) so we worked around his schedule...

 

[allisonswonderland]

Disney has been great - but on the family end, it has been awful - I have told many people to just elope- I worked at a Bridal Shop and would have brides come in after the wedding and they would say, it was beautiful, but we should have eloped- You could still elope at Disney- But if you want your family there like I did you will probably not do it- Check out my Losing my mind post!
It is your wedding do what you want!!!

 

[RangerPooh]

We origionally tried to accommodate various requests but in the end decided that it wasn't worth the hassle. Just accommodate yourselves. In the end one of the reasons we kept changing our date was to accommodate my brother but in the end it didn't matter as he was deployed to Iraq 3 mo prior to our wedding. Accommodating everyone is frustrating and will end up leaving you to sacrifce your dream wedding.

August is a warmer month, have you considered a morning or evening ceremony? This will help with the heat. We had a mid-day June wedding and were happy that the fog hung around until about 2 hours prior to our wedding.

 

[dannirose]

Yeah for some reason people hear the word "wedding" and associate that with "my opinion matters".

I am catching a lot of flack on my side for picking a Friday and my FMIL is not thrilled that people on her side are saying they probably won't attend because it's too far away/too expensive so she thinks we should get married in NY. Others have told me I should reconsider my ceremony location so they can sleep later. I have been informed by members of the bridal party what colors I should choose based on what THEY like best.

I am very proud of myself that I haven't tripped anyone yet.

DF and I came to an agreement long before we ever got engaged - WE make the final decisions. We will listen to any reasonable suggestion or opinion but we will not agree to do anything beyond that until he and I have discussed it privately. Ultimately, we are the ones who have to live with the consequences AND each other so we are taking care to make these decisions jointly.

 

[ItGirl753]

Well we haven't announced anything yet, so only a couple of people know at all. We're talking about having it at Disney so it has to be July or August because I (and a few close friends/family) are teachers, and it gives me time for a nice honeymoon. I know the heat is an issue. Also, if it's in Disney I told my BF we will have no wedding party, and he agreed to it...no arguing about colors or styles or prices...and because I refuse to have his brother be the Best Man and a major part of OUR special day due to his attitude problem and the way he treats me! I don't foresee a lot of problems from our parents, but you never know! If guests don't like my plans then they don't have to come. I think we will have an at-home reception for extended family, and there my mom can invite everyone she wants!

I'm sure I'll let you know when I run into my own dilemmas! I think my sisters will have many opinions!

 

[MissyPrissy]

yeah, you are going to have to get used to this one...every single person has an opinion and will share it without a thought. Even the Flower Girl will have an opinion...so not kidding!

You need to set the date you want to set. It is NOT up to anyone else. Yes you can take into account this or that, but ultimately it is up to you and your DF.

This is the stuff that will stress you out the most, so take my advice and the advice of others who have been there...this is YOUR day and you need to do what is best for you. Everyone else will just have to deal with it!!

Be TOUGH!!!

 

[Eoywin]

Just nod and smile, then do what you and your fiance want

My wedding is about a month and a half away (unfortunely, I couldn't afford a Disney wedding ), and I've had to fend of many opinions, especially my future mother in law's opinions.

 

[Moonpie]

My fiance and I are basically paying for the wedding ourselves so our family has no say on anything we planned. We decided on having our wedding in November because we love the Fall, and that's all the reason we gave to our family members. It's your wedding, and your choice as to how, when, and where you have it.

 

[ALittleDisneyFan]

I promise, after your wedding you won't even think about it! In the meantime simply smile and say "I'll think about it." or smile and say "Sorry, that isn't in the budget." Is your wedding in CA or in FL? Isn't August value season? Tell them you simply can not imagine yourself bumping it up a few weeks when it is regular season and making your poor poor family have to pay even more for hotels just because your boyfriend/the cousins/sis-in-law can't make it and wouldn't you (them) just feel awful for forcing others to pay a few extra hundred because it wasn't right for you (them.) I mean, be so over the top dramatic about it. If I were you, I'd even consider flailing my hand on to my head, looking up, and talking in a dramatic voice. LOL.

 

[BrideToBe82]

Our wedding will be in CA. We thought about the heat and that is why our ceremony is at 7:30pm. I talked to one of my friend from CA and she said that it is not even hot out there this month at night. As for inviting distant relatives my mom and dad are paying for the wedding so it is basically up to them. I am seriously thinking of not sending my distant relatives save the date cards and just sending them an invitation only a few months in advance so they won't be able to come Oh yeah and my bridesmaid just called and informed me that Aug 11 works for her boyfriend now so I won't have to change my wedding date. GRRR

 

[SRUAlmn]

Oh my gosh! I'm glad it's not just me! We've actually been engaged for almost a year, but just started planning since we aren't having our wedding until next summer. It's awful, isn't it? I actually started a thread on here called 'I just want to elope!' I was in tears to my fiance last night saying that it's supposed to be fun and it's NOT. His father is being the worst and that is even harder for me because it's not something I can directly deal with. Anyway, I feel your pain, but I have no advice because I'm there with ya! to you!