Wanna talk about Preschool

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I think that Universal Pre-K has its place, but that pre-schools who accept the funding ahve to modify their programs to state standards. Often, the pre-schools that do not accept funding, may have a stronger program.

My overall feeling on pre-school is that as a whole, it is unnecessary. But you woud have to make sure your child knows what is needed if you intend to send them to K. As tough as K is nowadays (I went straight to first grade myself when I was in school)...schools can and do have expectations on the skills your child needs and a pre-K environment can help you prepare them for that.

I homeschool and did not formally teach either of my children until they were 6 years old and they do great academically.

Pre-school is not the be all end all for education and I believe the public is mislead as to its importance to a certain degree for the general population. I find that extremely unfortunate.

I am not anti-preschool...but when you ask "is it really necessary"--my general answer is "no" IF you provide a nurturing environment at home. And no--you don't have to sit down with your 4yo at home and drill them with phonics and ABC's and such. Just nurturing them as an ordinary part of life. (my 2yo can count b/c we made it natural--we did not sit down and say "okay 2-yo, we will learn numbers no").

I have a friend with a sociology degree who wanted to borrow my pre-school program b/c she felt her sons pre-school was deficient in giving her what her son felt she needed. I had to explain that I had no such program. But I had lots of resources she could access if she so chose.


The price you found seems decent. Our parochial pre-school would have been about $200-$300 a month IIRC...about double what you plan on paying and that was about 6 years ago.

Do pre-school b/c you want to and send your child to the place you feel is best. But do not for one minute feel that you are a bad mom if you didn't do this and that your child is doomed academically. That is not the case.

 

[jenrose66]

Just curious, what do you consider terrible about your school system? I see on your think you are in NY state, they have about the same standards as we have here in PA, I was just wondering what is so bad about your system?

At least in my hometown the free preschool systems tend to be better than the private systems. I work for a public system, but have had experience in the private systems prior to this job. I have found the public systems have to maintain higher standards for all the review teams that come and go thru the centers, whereas many of the private schools do not have review teams and nothing to hold them accountable for the education of the children. In our center we need to constantly account for what we are teaching the children, have they achieved these skills, and if they have not, why not? In the public system it is constant record-keeping and accountability. They come up with new forms for us every couple months!

I'm not saying one is better than the other, there are many factors to consider, but in my experience it has been in favor of the public systems.

Just wondering what makes your public system so bad?

Out of all the schools in my area we are ranked 98th out of 100. I graduated from the district I live in and received a poor education. During elementary school it didn't seem apparent to me (probably because I was 5)...but thru highschool it was the pits. I missed 38 days of school my senior year because I felt attending school was a waste and I still graduated 7th in my class with a 97 average...the teachers didn't even bother marking me absent...if they did I wouldn't have graduated.

I have family that's currently in the district and they have made little if any improvement. There are virtually no extra curriculars and offer very few AP classes.

Also the administration doesn't care. They don't encourage parent feedback and children are treated like they are in jail. When you visit school district websites it usually has a philosophy about wanting kids to do well and caring about children. Not our school site, it has a clearly stated discipline policy and states the earliest time you are allowed to let your kids enter school grounds. I mean there is nothing wrong with a discipline policy...but where are the warm fuzzies. If you are not treating the children with respect then why are they going to respect you?

I like my city and it has an affordable cost of living. Yes certain parts of the city are some would say "economically disadvantaged" we have a large immigrant and minority population, which is great, it makes the city diverse. Isn't it even more important to give those children a good start? Instead of telling them they are going to fail and that they aren't behaved instill a love of learning and engage these children.

I remember when it was time to apply for college I visited the guidance office. They pushed the local community college or the armed services. I asked for a recommendation letter for NYU. My counselor told me that "my mom can't afford to send me there" and I shouldn't bother applying. So anyway she wrote me the recommendation and it was barely a paragraph and it was just terrible. Of course when there are no extra curriculars or advanced courses to take, I guess there isn't much you can put in the letter. I did volunteer work and some tutoring on my own, I also held down a job...so I did all I could to involve myself in other ways.

Anyway, I just don't want my sons in that environment. Even if it is just preschool. I don't want them getting off to the wrong start and that is why they are not going to ever step foot into a school run by my district. It may be better for us to move...I guess I'll have to weigh the costs of a higher mortgage with the ever increasing costs of school tuition. We'll cross that bridge in a couple years when my 2nd DS starts school. For now private preschool is fine.

Sorry that was so long. I usually try to not talk about my school district because I tend to get long winded. Suffice to say, it's just not for us. I guess one might ask why I bought a home in a district when I knew I'd eventually have kids and didn't want to send them to the schools...well me and DH were young and stupid and we figured we'd move (actually we had always talked about relocating south and still do) before we had kids. Well life caught up and the kids are here

 

[Minnie_me]

Since you are in New York State (as am I), you should definitely send him to preschool of some sort. The State Standards that New York has for Kindergarten are quite rigorous, and children who have no preschool experience are definitely behind before they even begin. I'm teaching Universal Pre-Kindergarten right now, and my curriculum is more rigorous than what I taught in Kindergarten 20 years ago!!!

I used to say that no preschool was necessary for children who came from families that would spend time reading and talking with them, and giving them all sorts of enriching experiences. But that's just not the case anymore.

Good luck in your decision!

 

[Minnie*J*]

I do all the basics with her at home. She knows all that stuff already. IMO, preschool's biggest value is in social interaction and learning to get along in a group setting (listening, taking turns etc). I don't think the focus should be curriculum based. I prefer play based.

This is how I feel. My oldest went to preschool and PreK a couple days a week because I wanted him to interact with kids his own age. He already knew his letters and numbers etc. With my younger ds I am working so he attends a daycare and we haven't decided about prek for him yet. He interacts with kids his age at daycare and again he learns his letters/numbers from us. So we'll see.

OP as far as price.... I don't think what you are paying is bad at all. We paid $115 a month (for 10 months) a couple years ago for 3 afternoons a week.

 

[mjkacmom]

Where I live, there is no public preschool, and most people send their kids to private for 2 years. Your preschool seems very inexpensive - our cheapest one cost $4000 for the year, but it was 5 days a week, 2 1/2 hours per day. Since almost everyone goes to preschool here, yes, the teachers do see a huge difference with those that don't attend, and it's not just academic. Learning to stay seated, raising hands, lining up - there are lots of skills that need a school setting to learn.

 

[torinsmom]

I don't think Preschool is absolutely necessary, but it does help. I teach PreK/K and it is nice for the kids to have that year to gain social skills, fine motor skills, etc. They get used to being on a schedule where everyone is going to lunch at once, going to the playground at once, napping at once, etc.

OP, are there any magnet or charter schools in your area? You might want to look into that option for next year. You can apply to any magnet school in your city and any charter school in your state. DS went to a Montessori charter school from PreK-8th grade and got a great education.

 

[mjkacmom]

My son will also start preschool this year. He will go to a Baptist school and the tuition is 1800 a year but 5 days a week, 8-2:30.
I think they have a huge advantage over other kids who don't attend preschool. We know kids who are in kindergarden now and didn't even know their ABCs or numbers before going. Our son who is 2 years younger already could count to 20 and knew his colors and many other things that their kids had no clue about.

At our elementary schools, kids are expected to at least identify and write their upper and lower case letters, count to 20, be able to write their names, capitalizing the first letter, and be able to write their addresses and phone numbers. Kids who come in without knowing the basics tend to spend 2 years in kindergarten, because by the end of the year, they need to be reading pretty well.

 

[vettechick99]

We have a public preschool and a private Enrichment School run by a Methodist Church. Pre-k is 5 days a week, 8am-2pm. Enrichment School is 4 days a week 9am-12noon.

As a first-grade teacher, I can tell you that the kids that come from ES come better prepared, in less than half the time spent at school. Now you also have to take into account that the kids at ES come from educated families that place emphasis on learning. That may not be the case at the Pre-K. In fact, you may also have kids at Pre-K that have never read a book or be around other kids. They are unfamiliar on the proper ways to behave socially. Our Pre-K teachers have their work cut out for them.

DD has been attending the ES 2YO class since August. She will do one more year(3YO class) before she attends their version of Pre-K. Then she'll go to K with everyone.

So tell your mom it DOES matter where your child attends Pre-K.

If you can afford the better Pre-K, go for it. I feel that it's worth it. Tell her a teacher said so.

 

[marcyinPA]

I do all the basics with her at home. She knows all that stuff already. IMO, preschool's biggest value is in social interaction and learning to get along in a group setting (listening, taking turns etc). I don't think the focus should be curriculum based. I prefer play based.

I teach 2 year olds at our church preschool. We also have classes for 3's, 4's and 5's who don't go to kindergarten yet. Our school is non-academic, play based. All of our teachers have four year degrees in education. We all believe in play-based pre-school. The five day 4/5's class does a little bit more to prepare the children for kindergarten, but you will never see a worksheet in any of our classes! In my 2's class, we talk about colors, shapes, letters and numbers but in an informal way. The children are exposed to it but it's not something that we concentrate on.

My feeling is this: who cares if they can read at 3 if they can not share or take turns and get along with others? We get a few families at our open house at registration time who do not register with us. They are looking for an academic program and won't get one with us. I will say that we are a very popular preschool in our area, though, and normally have wait lists. Our families speak very highly of our program! We are definitely doing something right!

I've been told by many kindergarten teachers that they can tell when a child has gone to pre-school....the social skills are usually better.

 

[marcyinPA]

I just signed my oldest DS up for preschool. He'll be 4 in July.

We didn't want to use the Universal Pre K in our district because we live in a terrible school system. My mom argues that it's just preschool and we shouldn't pay for it when he can use the district preschool for free...but I disagree.

Anyway we've been looking a lot online and we attended a few open houses. We found a school in the next town over so it's only a ten minute drive. As soon as I walked in I fell in love. The teachers were older and experienced, the classrooms were spacious and in good shape. Everything was decorated, they have a gym and an outdoor playground.

The cost for 3 days a week at 3 hours a day is $1550 for the entire school year Education is really expensive...I can't imagine what we'll be paying when we start elementary school...but I guess that's the price you pay for living in a bad district.

So would anyone like to share your preschool experiences? How did your children adjust and do you think they really do better in kindergarten because they went to pre-k?

I didn't understand what the big deal was with stuff like preschool until I became a mom. Now I'm just so excited. Jack's going into the world...he'll be making friends. This is all new stuff for him since he doesn't have family his age and has never been in a daycare. I mean we go to the playground but never actual meaningful interaction.

I teach at a church-based preschool....just to give you a point of reference of tuition, here's ours (in PA...north of Philly and west of NYC)

Annual tuition
1 day a week: $500.00
2 days: $1000.00
3 days: $1350.00
4 days: $1780.00
5 days: $2010.00

Our school day is drop off between 9:15 and 9:30, pick up between 11:30 and 11:45.

 

[golfgal]

I remember DS17's first day of preschool. He was pretty nervous-we had just moved and he knew NO ONE. We had toured the school, he met his teachers but still, he was 4. He had found an old pacifier in a toy box and started carrying it around a week or so before school started. We were getting ready to go to school and I could just see the wheels in his head turning as to how he was going to carry this around in school. I told him if he put it in his pocket no one would know it was there so he did. We went to school and as he walked in the door he took the pacifier out of his pocket and handed it to me and said "I don't think I will need this" My baby.

Now we are getting ready to go off to COLLEGE .

 

[RangerPooh]

We paid $175/month for 3 days a week, 2.5 hours a day preschool. BUt it was the nicest facility in town with teachers who had early education backgrounds. We sent her for the socialization as well as learning experience. It was worth it in IMO. Even if it was only for the duration of the school year.

Our school district has a free Pre-K program for those who qualify based on income, special educaiton services, and if space allows children who don't fit into the 2 categories (ie; who'se families make too much). It is housed within the elementary schools and every teacher must have a valid teahcing certificate. I teach in one of these classrooms and have a morning and afternoon session 5 days a week.

We have a structured classroom where the curriculum is to follow the state learning standards (and as new teachers we attend mandatory training sessions monthly to ensure we understand the learning standards). Our day consists of calendar time (math, science, and basic language-ABCs), Center time for play which is rotated daily, guided reading/literacy where we read to them and they picture read stories, snack and recess. It's 2.5 hours but we really work to provide the best program possible.

Many of the stduents in our class started school in August not knowing any of th eletters in their names, none of their ABCs or numbes, colors, shapes, etc. At this point the majority of our students can spell/write their names without looking, know most of their ABCs, and can count to atleast 5. But you can tell those who come from home environemnts where the parents work with them on these things as they far exceed their peers. I do think that Pre-K is about socialization, developing cooperative skills, establishing the foundation for future learning, enhancing their self help skills, and learning how to follow routines.

 

[golfgal]

Oh, and one more bit of advice for all those just starting on the school career with their kids--don't automatically believe everything your child says--if you remember this your school experience will be so much better. Kids can be VERY convincing-both with the stories at home and at SCHOOL. DS told us every day about what he had at lunch, who he sat by, what they did after lunch, the whole deal. I kept thinking "I don't remember lunch being a part of the day and I had never sent in lunch money". We had conferences and asked the teacher about it--she just hooted--no lunch served at all .

Some friends DD kept telling her teachers about how her real parents were killed in a car accident and that her now parents adopted her and her 3 brothers and one of her brothers they called "Nut" because he would only eat peanuts. She went on and on with this story. This was a pretty small town and the teachers were pretty sure it wasn't true but she was so convincing that they asked her parents about it at conferences .


Learn to ask questions in the right way--your child comes home from school and says the teacher yelled at me, you ask why, the kid says "I don't know"===this is where a lot of people will storm up to the school and demand to see the principal and post a nasty thread on a message board . If you take it one step further and ask "what were you doing right before the teacher yelled at you" your child answers "well, I wasn't holding a scissor to Janie's braid or anything"--you just saved yourself a lot of embarrassment.

 

[marcyinPA]

Oh, and one more bit of advice for all those just starting on the school career with their kids--don't automatically believe everything your child says--if you remember this your school experience will be so much better. Kids can be VERY convincing-both with the stories at home and at SCHOOL. DS told us every day about what he had at lunch, who he sat by, what they did after lunch, the whole deal. I kept thinking "I don't remember lunch being a part of the day and I had never sent in lunch money". We had conferences and asked the teacher about it--she just hooted--no lunch served at all .

Some friends DD kept telling her teachers about how her real parents were killed in a car accident and that her now parents adopted her and her 3 brothers and one of her brothers they called "Nut" because he would only eat peanuts. She went on and on with this story. This was a pretty small town and the teachers were pretty sure it wasn't true but she was so convincing that they asked her parents about it at conferences .


Learn to ask questions in the right way--your child comes home from school and says the teacher yelled at me, you ask why, the kid says "I don't know"===this is where a lot of people will storm up to the school and demand to see the principal and post a nasty thread on a message board . If you take it one step further and ask "what were you doing right before the teacher yelled at you" your child answers "well, I wasn't holding a scissor to Janie's braid or anything"--you just saved yourself a lot of embarrassment.

Along these same lines: If you don't want to hear the truth about your child's day when he/she is released at the door, then don't ask. Send an email, whatever, to the teacher.

If I'm asked "How was her day?", and she sat by herself and wouldn't play on the playground (and this is consistent behavior for the past five months...), then I tell her mother the truth. Some parents can't handle the truth, apparently, and then tell you that you are unprofessional. Yes, this happened to me. I've worked with close to 100 families in the past 4 years, and NEVER have I EVER been called "unprofessional". At the risk of sounding like I'm bragging, parents always tell me how much they love me. This parent/teacher conference really sent me into a spin....

 

[locolala]

Holy cow, I WISH the costs of preschool here were like that. For 5 days a week 9-12, and then daycare from 12-6, it's going to be about 10k a year to send Aline to preschool. We have to do the daycare since DH and I will both be working 9-5 jobs. That's at a montessori school down the road from where I'll be working.

As to if it's needed, it's not 100% necessary but it is highly recommended. My MIL is a kindergarten teacher, and she can very easily tell when a child has been to preschool. In general they are more adjusted to being away from mom and dad for a full day, they have better social skills, and have a greater knowledge about reading, writing, basic math etc. My dad (child psychologist) agrees with her and has shown me a few studies about the psychological effects of preschool, it's really interesting!

 

[freepixie]

Out of all the schools in my area we are ranked 98th out of 100. I graduated from the district I live in and received a poor education. During elementary school it didn't seem apparent to me (probably because I was 5)...but thru highschool it was the pits. I missed 38 days of school my senior year because I felt attending school was a waste and I still graduated 7th in my class with a 97 average...the teachers didn't even bother marking me absent...if they did I wouldn't have graduated.

I have family that's currently in the district and they have made little if any improvement. There are virtually no extra curriculars and offer very few AP classes.

Also the administration doesn't care. They don't encourage parent feedback and children are treated like they are in jail. When you visit school district websites it usually has a philosophy about wanting kids to do well and caring about children. Not our school site, it has a clearly stated discipline policy and states the earliest time you are allowed to let your kids enter school grounds. I mean there is nothing wrong with a discipline policy...but where are the warm fuzzies. If you are not treating the children with respect then why are they going to respect you?

I like my city and it has an affordable cost of living. Yes certain parts of the city are some would say "economically disadvantaged" we have a large immigrant and minority population, which is great, it makes the city diverse. Isn't it even more important to give those children a good start? Instead of telling them they are going to fail and that they aren't behaved instill a love of learning and engage these children.

I remember when it was time to apply for college I visited the guidance office. They pushed the local community college or the armed services. I asked for a recommendation letter for NYU. My counselor told me that "my mom can't afford to send me there" and I shouldn't bother applying. So anyway she wrote me the recommendation and it was barely a paragraph and it was just terrible. Of course when there are no extra curriculars or advanced courses to take, I guess there isn't much you can put in the letter. I did volunteer work and some tutoring on my own, I also held down a job...so I did all I could to involve myself in other ways.

Anyway, I just don't want my sons in that environment. Even if it is just preschool. I don't want them getting off to the wrong start and that is why they are not going to ever step foot into a school run by my district. It may be better for us to move...I guess I'll have to weigh the costs of a higher mortgage with the ever increasing costs of school tuition. We'll cross that bridge in a couple years when my 2nd DS starts school. For now private preschool is fine.

Sorry that was so long. I usually try to not talk about my school district because I tend to get long winded. Suffice to say, it's just not for us. I guess one might ask why I bought a home in a district when I knew I'd eventually have kids and didn't want to send them to the schools...well me and DH were young and stupid and we figured we'd move (actually we had always talked about relocating south and still do) before we had kids. Well life caught up and the kids are here

Thank you for explaining, I got it now! I guess we are so blessed in my hometown to have a super public system! If I were in your shoes I would definatly be sending my child to private school

 

[freckles and boo]

OP, did you actually visit the public pre-school classrooms? It sounds like you have a very strong bias based on your own school experiences and no warm fuzzies on the website. My district has an old, terrible website (which is in the process of being completely overhauled) but it excels at educating students. I would only suggest that if you want to stay in your community as your children grow, you need to be one of the forces for change. Go to the school board meetings. Join the PTA. Hold the administrators' feet to the fire. It drives me nuts when people whine about public schools and then don't do anything to help make them better.

 

[golfgal]

Holy cow, I WISH the costs of preschool here were like that. For 5 days a week 9-12, and then daycare from 12-6, it's going to be about 10k a year to send Aline to preschool. We have to do the daycare since DH and I will both be working 9-5 jobs. That's at a montessori school down the road from where I'll be working.

As to if it's needed, it's not 100% necessary but it is highly recommended. My MIL is a kindergarten teacher, and she can very easily tell when a child has been to preschool. In general they are more adjusted to being away from mom and dad for a full day, they have better social skills, and have a greater knowledge about reading, writing, basic math etc. My dad (child psychologist) agrees with her and has shown me a few studies about the psychological effects of preschool, it's really interesting!

That is about what we are paying for DS's COLLEGE

 

[torinsmom]

oops--double post

 

[locolala]

That is about what we are paying for DS's COLLEGE

It really is crazy how expensive it is, but I think it'll be worth it. We'd have to pay for childcare anyhow, so she might as well get some educational benefits too. Now, we are going to try to get some financial aid through the school, they have scholarships and the like, but I'm not hopeful. By the time she's old enough to be in preschool I'll have my masters and be working for the gov't as a gs-10.. so I'll make enough to cover everything. I hope...