Vow renewals

[4nana]

Freyja, so nice to see you again! I think it's called different strokes , who can judge, couples have vow renewals for their own personal reasons . Like you, I was very young (17) when DH and I eloped in 1964, starting out with 2 $10. gold wedding bands. We honeymooned for 3 yrs till our first blessing arrived and within 5 yrs had the pitter patter of 4 blessings... who needless to say, always came first, lots of responsibilites, and leaving lil time for anything else . Good times we would've change for love nor money!!

Years later when were in a better financial position, had joined a different church, we decided to renew our vows, with our 4 children participating and close family members attending. It meant a lot to us and this time we were able to honeymoon in Hawaii. Will be 49 yrs this May and still going strong !! I say: to each his own....really none of anyone else's business....vows/renewals are between you, your soulmate, (and God)! Nuff said!

 

[Desnik]

We had a vow renewal in 2009 at WDW. 50 of our family members & friends joined us & were more than happy to do so. We didn't do it because our vows expired. We never had a wedding, just married in the courthouse. We always wanted a Disney wedding & came in to a large amount if money so it was our way of celebrating. We celebrated surviving a horrific car accident followed by years of litigation & health issues. Our relationship was tested in so many ways & we stood strong, together. We felt a vow renewal at Disney was the perfect way to celebrate! You can read about it & see pictures by clicking the link in my signature.

I'll never get the hostility people have against vow renewals. It's a celebration of love. No, you don't have to go & be apart if it, but you don't have to begrudge the couple that does it.

 

[Handbag Lady]

I think to each their own. For me, I would do it just for the party and to celebrate us. We've had ups and downs (especially in our first year of marriage) so it would be just for the fun of us. We had a great wedding, so there you go.

My grand-aunt had a huge re-marriage on her 50th. We're Italian. Big, BIG party. She even had on display their wedding clothes. Her wedding jacket and shoes still fit her, amazing! It wasn't a renewal, it was a PARTY. She had a white wedding dress that looked more like a mother of the bride dress, very tasteful and the pictures of the whole family were great. They used the familiy priest for the ceremony so that was great, too.

I love going to renewals, but I agree, it really is a misnomer. We need to come up with a better name. Marriage vows do not expire. Anniversary Weddings?

 

[Disneybuckeye]

I'll take it one step further. I don't "get" vow renewals, period. My wedding vows didn't come with an expiration date.

I'm with you. This is something I will never understand. To each their own though.

 

[Pigeon]

I think to each their own. For me, I would do it just for the party and to celebrate us. We've had ups and downs (especially in our first year of marriage) so it would be just for the fun of us. We had a great wedding, so there you go.

My grand-aunt had a huge re-marriage on her 50th. We're Italian. Big, BIG party. She even had on display their wedding clothes. Her wedding jacket and shoes still fit her, amazing! It wasn't a renewal, it was a PARTY. She had a white wedding dress that looked more like a mother of the bride dress, very tasteful and the pictures of the whole family were great. They used the familiy priest for the ceremony so that was great, too.

I love going to renewals, but I agree, it really is a misnomer. We need to come up with a better name. Marriage vows do not expire. Anniversary Weddings?

I think calling it any sort of "wedding" is particularly ridiculous. If you want to have an anniversary party, that's one thing. To try to pretend you're getting married again is something else.

 

[Deb in IA]

I'll be honest. I kind of don't "get" vow renewals unless you have worked your way back from the brink of divorce. Even for a milestone anniversary.

I'll take it one step further. I don't "get" vow renewals, period. My wedding vows didn't come with an expiration date.

I am in the "I don't get it" camp.

My original vows are still fine, so I don't have a need to renew them, milestone anniversary or not.

The only one I've been to was for my SIL - who had a renewal in a church, with fancy clothes (but not a gown or bridesmaids and such), family and friends.

They were divorced less than a year later.

 

[punkin]

I'll take it one step further. I don't "get" vow renewals, period. My wedding vows didn't come with an expiration date.

I'm with you on this one, BUT I can definitely see doing a huge anniversary party for a milestone anniversary. Maybe for our 25th (in 3 years) we will do something special.

 

[chris1gill]

I've been mulling this over for our 20th. We are returning to a far off tropical resort where we honeymooned, only this time our daughter will be with us. She's now a teen and would like us to re-affirm our vows in the worst way She just wants to buy the dress

People do this for a variety of reasons and it's nobody's business to judge the happily married couple's decision. I wouldn't do an all out wedding as someone described, been there done that....

 

[punkin]

I've been mulling this over for our 20th. We are returning to a far off tropical resort where we honeymooned, only this time our daughter will be with us. She's now a teen and would like us to re-affirm our vows in the worst way She just wants to buy the dress

People do this for a variety of reasons and it's nobody's business to judge the happily married couple's decision. I wouldn't do an all out wedding as someone described, been there done that....

True, and I am not judging; just commenting that I wouldn't do it because I don't "get" it. Other people are entitled to their own choices.

 

[DeaverTex]

I've considered doing something like a vow renewal, but without the vows. (As others have said, those don't expire.) We might say something to each other, something brief, but not much at all.

And then we'd have the party that we didn't have at our wedding. We had a reception at the United Methodist church where we were married. Finger food, a cake, toss the boquet, drink some lemonaid, chat a bit, and everybody went home. I want a reception like you read about on Wedding Bee. (But no karaoke! Nobody deserves to be subjected to that.) Maybe for our 40th, in a little over three years.

Or maybe not, of course, since I'm at least as tight-fisted as my avatar! But it's fun to think about.

If you want to do a vow renewal -- anywhere from something simple to a full-fledged rehash of your wedding -- why not? Life's too short to worry much about what other people think or say about you. Go for it!

 

[ilovemk76]

We have done away, as we will again this year, for our Anniversary. We do not want or see the point of a vow renewal. We show each other how important we are each day. Our vows were taken once and are still valid.

I have never know anybody to have a vow renewal. We have had anniversary parties, but the couple does not throw it and no gifts are expected but most still give them. We had a close friend host a 25th anniversary for us. We were totally shocked. It was so special and way more meaningful than planning our own vow renewal.

I could see doing this if one person did something, such as cheat, and this was their way to show they were committing by taking new vows.

 

[EMom]

I'm just grateful no one has called it a "vowel renewal."

I'm in the "why?" camp as my vows are still completely valid and have not expired, and therefore not in need of renewal. A party or a trip? That makes sense.

 

[luv2sleep]

Would love to hear from people who have renewed their vows. If you wouldn't mind sharing "why" you did it, where, how, who was present etc. I would be very grateful.

I only know 1 couple who did a vow renewal and they did it in the same church they got married in and only their children attended.

DH and I have been married 16 years and this is something that is starting to appeal to me more and more

I didn't have a real wedding so, if it were me, I'd do one to experience the magic of something fun and similar to a wedding. Sounds like fun!

 

[Pigeon]

I didn't have a real wedding so, if it were me, I'd do one to experience the magic of something fun and similar to a wedding. Sounds like fun!

If you are legally married, you had a "real wedding."

 

[donac]

Vow Renewal is not for everyone. Some people love it and some people don't.

My parents did it for their 25th and again at their 50th.

If you are not into romance please skip the rest of this post.

On our 24th anniv I woke up to 24 red roses on my dinning room table and 24 balloons in my living room. During the day their were other presents. Dh told me that their would be 24 presents to celebrate the day.

The last present was a lenox box that said "Happy 25th" When I opened it up there a note inside that said "Will you marry me again?"

We renewed our vows the following year with just immediate family and friends in our back yard. It was lovely.

With so many divorced couple we should be celebrating when marriages last for 25 or 50 years.

 

[kimmyann]

If you are legally married, you had a "real wedding."

I just have to assume by this comment that you have not been married yet or you had a wedding. For someone like me who was legally married & did not have an actual wedding, I get how you could want one later.

 

[epcot.girl]

I just have to assume by this comment that you have not been married yet or you had a wedding. For someone like me who was legally married & did not have an actual wedding, I get how you could want one later.

I'm married and agree with Pigeon. There is no distinction. If you are legally married you had 'an actual wedding'. It may not have been the wedding you wanted but it was very much a 'real wedding'. Wedding = act/ceremony of marrying. I didn't have a lot of the extra stuff that comes with a wedding (out of choice) but it was still just as real as the weddings with hundreds of guests, a ten tier cake, speeches, a big white dress, attendants and all that other stuff.

That said, I don't begrudge anyone who wants to do it again in the same or a different way. It's their time/money to do with as they please.

 

[SaraJayne]

If you are legally married, you had a "real wedding."

There is a huge difference between being legally married and having a wedding.

 

[happygirl]

We just had our 10 year. It was amazing to be able to include our children in ours.

 

[ilovedisney1982]

Would love to hear from people who have renewed their vows. If you wouldn't mind sharing "why" you did it, where, how, who was present etc. I would be very grateful.

I only know 1 couple who did a vow renewal and they did it in the same church they got married in and only their children attended.

DH and I have been married 16 years and this is something that is starting to appeal to me more and more

I did a vow renewal this past November. I did it on my 10th anniversary with both of my children there. To be honest, it was going all out once more. All in all, we spent almost as much as we did on our original wedding on our vow renewal. I had it in a beautiful cathedral near my house. I bought a new wedding gown and shoes. I wore my great-grandmother's veil (for the second time) at my vow renewal. We did every little nick-and-nack possible. A wedding stylist, live entertainment, BIG cake, about 350 people, and even an ice sculpture. We saved costs by doing the reception in my backyard. It's big, and I like keeping a little garden so once it was decorated, it looked like a venue out of the magazines. It was such a great experience to express my love to my DH while my friends, children, and family were there. I say, go for the vow renewal, hands down. You'll have a great time!