Vacationing with in-laws advice

[NU2WDW]

Plan on doing things away from them, but seriously, time is sacred with Dh? umm...something tells me you see him WAY more than his mom....and she's important to him too. Suck it up.

How unnecessary.

Did you even read the thread?

 

[Octoberbabiesrus]

Yep read the first one. You know the one where the OP acts like she's the only that should vacation with DH

 

[mrsbornkuntry]

Yep read the first one. You know the one where the OP acts like she's the only that should vacation with DH

MIL is more than welcome to vacation with Dh, I have no issue with that at all, I'm much more concerned about Dh's time with our kids being ruined by someone that doesn't like spending time with them. For our family a trip to WDW is for our kids, when we want to do something "adult" we go elsewhere. My 4yo DS asks me every morning when he wakes up "Will my Daddy be home today?" just when dh goes off to work because he's so scared he'll wake up and Dh will be in Iraq, my kids deserve to have some fun time with DH not spoiled by IL's that don't want to do kiddie stuff. We planned the trip with all this in mind.

This isn't a one-sided "I want DH all to myself" thing going on here, this is DH and I united not wanting them along on our trip because we're going for the kids and they don't like kids, including ours.

ETA: And as far as me seeing Dh more than she does, she only lives 30 minutes away and knows she's welcome at our home, at the kids' activities, etc. We've invited her frequently to things that the kids are doing and she never comes (I think I already mentioned this in this thread...), Dh feels he's missed so much of the kids' lives that he isn't going to sit them out to go to MIL's, if she wants to see him she knows where he is, she chooses not to go.

 

[NU2WDW]

Yep read the first one. You know the one where the OP acts like she's the only that should vacation with DH

As his wife, yes, the OP is in fact the only one that "should" vacation with him. Anyone else invited into their plans, including his mother, is an extra.

It's just a bit creepy to think a grown man's mommy has some kind of equal claim on his time.

 

[Nancyg56]

Plan on doing things away from them, but seriously, time is sacred with Dh? umm...something tells me you see him WAY more than his mom....and she's important to him too. Suck it up.

Wow I have two sons and neither one of them would tolerate my trying to have "equal time". If they did then I would say I failed in my job. I raised them to put their family before me.

As his wife, yes, the OP is in fact the only one that "should" vacation with him. Anyone else invited into their plans, including his mother, is an extra.

It's just a bit creepy to think a grown man's mommy has some kind of equal claim on his time.

It is silly. I never saw that the OP did not want to include her MIL, she simply did not want to include her and the FIL only to find that they were miserable, translating into a miserable vacation for her family. I don't blame her. I have vacationed with my sons and with my DD and I can honestly sat that I had a wonderful time each time, it is a shame that this family has IL's who have chosen to avoid their grandchildren yet want to share vacation in a place that they will not be happy. I would not trade the wonderful times I have had with my adult children but I know that I would never be able to ruin a trip for them either.

 

[dzneelvr]

I'd have to be legally insane to ever consider a WDW trip with my IL's I would estimate the ratio of nighmares to positive experiences run about 10:1, so may the force be with you

 

[surfer_ed]

Here is my situation.

For 3 years my mom has tried to get me and my brothers family to all go. We go every years but Brother can't afford so they always cancel.

This year it might happen so I book a Treehouse for the 9 of us, which is the max number allowed in a Treehouse.

I am not keen on this because my SIL and mother do not get on that well but I know all the kids will have a blast so I ante up the DVC points and plan once again.

Now my SIL invites her mother (Who is also my wife's mother, 2 brothers married two sisters).

This brings us to 10, above the max occupancy AND my Mother does not like my MIL for various reasons. They say someone will sleep on the floor and my mother can just suck it up and live with it. So this is turning out to be a trip from...

My wife does not think this is a big deal, since it is also her mother and would like her to spend time with all the grand kids together as well.

 

[mickeyncldkd]

Unfortunately, I have the other problem. My parents are worse than my MIL and FIL. I like the idea of the iternary. My wife gives my mom the iternary and they can go do some things by themself. We actually try to stay at different hotels when we go with my family. My family takes forever to get ready so I tell them a half hour early so they get to reservation on time or where ever. When my brother (wife), sister, and other sister (family) came one time. I was going to throw my self in front of the main station train. We got nothing done with rides or anything. I believe my family is slower than a family slothes. When they left, we stay for 4 days later. we finish rides and had nice dining experience. Good luck with the trip, but try to have your MIL and FIL not to come. It becomes a job instead of vacation.

 

[surfer_ed]

Well to clarify my mother is probably the harder one to get along with and she is the type not to speak up if she doesn't like anything but to complain to me about it.

My MIL is great, my mother just does not like her based on some issues with my in-laws and my brother. Puts me in a bad place when they are my in-laws too.

Why can't people just get along...

 

[xbatman]

I agree with the others who have said that the most important thing is to be clear on what everyone expects from the trip well before you go.

We had a wonderful trip with my dad and stepmom in 2007, but we had decided what everyone wanted to do months before the trip and only spent about half the time together (and they're very easy to get along with and realized our trip was centered around DD).

We stayed at WL; they stayed in RV at Fort Wilderness. We went to the parks every day; they golfed 3 days and went on the Segway tour at Epcot. We ate every meal CS or TS; they ate most meals at the RV. We spent 3 park days together (they followed our plans into which I planned things I knew my dad would want to see but mainly revolved around DD), went to MVMCP and had 3 TS meals together. DD4 spent one night with them in the RV.

It was a perfect balance. We all enjoyed having the type of vacation each group wanted. Everything was planned ahead of time, so there were no conflicts during the trip.