Update post 202 & 207. A 22yo girl calls and says to my DH, he is her father.

[The Mystery Machine]

So he is going to go and see her. What should we do first? Get paternity and then what?
Can the mother sue for child support?
The mother claims she listed another person as the father on the birth certificate.

She is 22. Should we hire a lawyer now?

WWYD?

 

[CEDmom]

Well, I don't think the mother can sue for child support since the child is now an adult. Also, if she listed someone else on the birth certificate I don't know where she'd stand on any claim of back child support.

Honestly, I'd probably hire a lawyer to protect yourself. Could be completely on the up and up but these days you can't be too careful.

 

[CharityLynn]

Wow, that is crazy. Is there any chance that he did father the girl? If there is then I guess a paternity test would be the next logical step, I'd hope the young woman would respect your husband's request. I'm not sure about a lwayer though. Good luck hope everything turns out the way it"s meant too. I wouldn't think the mom could sure for support especially since the daughter is 22. Has your husband talked to the "mom" to find out why this is judt coming out?

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Yes he talked with both of them today. And yes there is a chance.

The mother got involved with someone else and never told my DH. She claims that she listed this man on the birth certificate.

The daughter was told my DH was her father when she was 5. The mother never tried for contact with my dh.

As a side note the mother is going thru a divorce with this person.

 

[r3ngels]

I would call a lawyer because you want to make sure you are covered...Good Luck

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Also this girl has 2 kids so now my DH could be technically a grandpa.
He is in shock.

I told him he does need to do paternity test and hire a lawyer.
Go do all that, meet the people and check out the situation.

 

[4greatboys]

I would have a paternity test then proceed from there.

 

[j's m]

Hire a lawyer first, and get his opinion on the paternity test.

 

[Rock'n Robin]

Don't let him get attached to these people until he's sure he is the real father. This mom could be saying this to hurt her soon to be ex husband. But if your DH is the daddy, I don't think anyone can sue at this point. Just try to enjoy the additions to the family.
Robin M.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

My DH wants to know so he will do the paternity test no matter what is my guess.

Of course now there will be legal ramifications of that...what I don't know.

 

[phillybeth]

Hire a lawyer first, and get his opinion on the paternity test.

Ditto on that! Lawyer frist, and NO WAY would I meet with the person before a consult with a lawyer. It could be completely innocent, then again it might not. Better to be safe.

 

[Cindy's Mom]

I would run to my attorney. You said the mother is getting a divorce; she may be after some quick cash. I would be prepared for the worse. Good luck to you.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Don't let him get attached to these people until he's sure he is the real father. This mom could be saying this to hurt her soon to be ex husband. But if your DH is the daddy, I don't think anyone can sue at this point. Just try to enjoy the additions to the family.
Robin M.

I think the soon to be EX already knew this and it was no secret.
Oh and thanks....

 

[AprilShowers]

I don't know about that child support thing. I know someone who found out later that he had a daughter. The court made him pay back child support even though another man had paid several years of child support to this woman.
They told him it was up to him to go back on the other guy to try to get the support back! So in essence this woman received child support from two men for the same child. Because this guy I know didn't bother to try to sue the other guy to get his $$ back.

 

[hydster]

Get a lawyer first before jumping into anything else. They would know where to start, legal ramifications and the like!

I hope you can get a resolution that is good for all involved!

 

[Glinda64]

My guess is that the girl feels more comfortable contacting your DH now that there is going to be a divorce between her mother and the man who raised her. I can't imagine the surprise you and your husband have felt. I hope it all works out.

 

[pearlieq]

Yeah, I hate to say it, but I'd lawyer up too!

I hope this turns out in the best possible way for your family. If it turns out to be true and everyones on the up-and-up, it could be nice to have some new additions to the family.

 

[WonderfulDreamer2]

Well bless your heart. You seem to be handling this much better than I would. I assume you two were not married 23 years ago?

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Ditto on that! Lawyer frist, and NO WAY would I meet with the person before a consult with a lawyer. It could be completely innocent, then again it might not. Better to be safe.

I told my DH this. I know he is freaking out.
I keep telling him that he does need to CYA for his family here. You never know.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Well bless your heart. You seem to be handling this much better than I would. I assume you two were not married 23 years ago?

We have been together for 20yrs and married 16. Yea, he dodged a bullet. That was the first thing I said.