UPDATE: Kindergartener LOST

[RachelsMommie]

Need some outside, non-biased opinions. I know some teachers and parents are on this board (Kevin, you used to teach K, right?) and thought you might be able to help.

When my husband went to pick up our daughter from school today, he got in the usual car pick-up lane. When they called for my daughter to come to the car, she was nowhere to be found.

So he parked the car and went inside to help them figure out where she was. They searched the school for her and put out an APB through the police department for my daughter. THIRTY MINUTES LATER, they found her across the street from the school. Apparently, she accidentally got in the wrong line (the line for the walkers) and followed them out of the building. Thank GOD, an older kid noticed her and alerted a crossing guard that she shouldn't be there (Kindergarteners are not allowed to walk home without a sibling) and the crossing guard had no way of alerting the office and had to just hold her there until someone came that way looking for Rachel. Yes, in 2010, the teacher at the crosswalk had no cell phone or walkie talkie.

The school principal has assured me that from now on, they will put Rachel at the front of the line when walking to the car pickup area, but I'm concerned that if this happens to her again or to another child, it could end MUCH worse. Anything could have happened to her in the 20-30 minutes that she was lost...anyone could have picked her up, she could have been hit by a car, etc. I'm such a overprotective parent that my husband quit his job to be a SAHD to be with our kiddos until they are older. Now I find that I still can't protect her.

I have a meeting tomorrow and am trying to figure out how to rectify this situation. What would you guys do????

Thanks...trying to calm down while holding my sweet girl now.

Kristi

 

[pittsburghmarc]

Wow Kristi. I couldn't imagine what you were going through. My daughter just started kindergarten as well.

My daughter has to wear a pin for the first two weeks of school that not only has her name on it, but also the bus number for her ride home. Maybe a suggestion of that sort?

Good luck.

 

[Sarabi's Cubs]

First, I'm so sorry that you had such a scare and glad that your little girl was ok! It's bizarre to me that your daughter could walk out of the building and across the street before someone noticed that she was not in the right place, and then that the person who noticed was not school staff but another child. Making her then stand on a streetcorner with the crossing guard for 30 minutes is unacceptable. And putting her at the front of the line doesn't address the larger problem.

At my children's school, all of the kindergartners are paired with a 4th grade buddy. The buddy is someone either on their bus or who also is driven home. At dismissal, the buddies come to the kindergarten classroom and escort them where they need to go. That way, kindergartners are NEVER on their own getting to the busses or to where car riders/walkers are dismissed. Also, there are staff members everywhere making sure the children get to the right place and they are well aware that no kindergartner should ever be alone. At a minimum, there should be some way for the crossing guard to communicate with the office (our school has walkie talkies).

I hope your meeting goes well.

 

[maddiesmom0116]

Need some outside, non-biased opinions. I know some teachers and parents are on this board (Kevin, you used to teach K, right?) and thought you might be able to help.

When my husband went to pick up our daughter from school today, he got in the usual car pick-up lane. When they called for my daughter to come to the car, she was nowhere to be found.

So he parked the car and went inside to help them figure out where she was. They searched the school for her and put out an APB through the police department for my daughter. THIRTY MINUTES LATER, they found her across the street from the school. Apparently, she accidentally got in the wrong line (the line for the walkers) and followed them out of the building. Thank GOD, an older kid noticed her and alerted a crossing guard that she shouldn't be there (Kindergarteners are not allowed to walk home without a sibling) and the crossing guard had no way of alerting the office and had to just hold her there until someone came that way looking for Rachel. Yes, in 2010, the teacher at the crosswalk had no cell phone or walkie talkie.

The school principal has assured me that from now on, they will put Rachel at the front of the line when walking to the car pickup area, but I'm concerned that if this happens to her again or to another child, it could end MUCH worse. Anything could have happened to her in the 20-30 minutes that she was lost...anyone could have picked her up, she could have been hit by a car, etc. I'm such a overprotective parent that my husband quit his job to be a SAHD to be with our kiddos until they are older. Now I find that I still can't protect her.

I have a meeting tomorrow and am trying to figure out how to rectify this situation. What would you guys do????

Thanks...trying to calm down while holding my sweet girl now.

Kristi

I am so sorry, I know exactly how you feel. I had a very similar situation with my 1st grader last week. I was the 2nd car in the car line and they kept calling her number and then asked me if she could have gotten mixed up and taken the bus home instead. Well, I live less then 1 mile from the school and the bus does not run that close to the school, so that was a no. Well after 20 minutes and half the line gone, the teacher went to look for my DD since DD's teacher didn't know where she went after the bell. DD also got put into the wrong line and got onto a bus,she then got off the bus as she knew she shouldn't be on it and was turned around as this is her first year in the school and couldn't find the carpool doors from where she came in from the bus. I was flipping out to say the least, thinking my baby was riding a random bus to anywhere at that point. The teachers aide that told her she did ride the bus and put her in the line after she tried to tell her has been disciplined and is no longer completing the task of dispursing the kids.

I am frightened this happened to you too, I thought it was a fluke, but now I am not so sure.

I think you should ask for written plan to ensure the kids get to the right places. This way you have something in writing to take to the district office if it happens again. You should also talk to your child to ensure she knows where to go and where not to go.

Another thing that upset me and I wonder if this happened with you, they would not let me look around the school for her, they made me stay outside.

 

[SusanWasHere]

I'm so sorry for what happened with your daughter. I'm sure it was terrifying. I am in no way defending the school. Being a teacher - I am usually anti-everything-the-school-says LOL. BUT.... I just got switched to a different school in my district and they do dismissal COMPLETELY different than the way the other school did. I had no idea that dismissal could change so much from once place to another. I actually told another teacher today that I don't feel like I'm in the same district - I feel like I'm in Korea.

There are so many people at dismissal time in the same area. The worst part is all the parents that come to pick up the kids (not that they are bad - I mean as far as the swarm of them all looking and grabbing for kids). It seriously scares me - and I've been teaching 17 years. I've seen some parents come up behind the line and call out to the kid and they don't let the teacher know Today a teacher had the kids in line at the bus door. A parent must have decided last minute to pick up their child and came to the bus line and took the kid out. People were calling out to her that she needed to sign the kid out - not just take them. Mind you, at this time there are 700 kids leaving at the same time, with every teacher out there, swarms of parents, bus drivers, kids picking up siblings, etc.

So again - I am not defending the school. But I have to say I feel like some dismissal procedures definitely need to change. Some people don't want to follow the rules and don't want to take the few minutes to go through the protocol. And this puts many others in danger. I am hoping that it isn't like this all year at this school, I keep hoping it gets better once everyone gets adjusted. I hope it is the same at your school. Trust me - teachers don't want to lose kids! I have a spec ed class and only have 4 kids. I count them constantly -even in our room with the door closed LOL. Hope all goes well and that they maybe tighten up the procedure or change it for the better. Just like I hope my school does... or I may have a heart attack!! And I can assure you that a staff meeting will be called ASAP to discuss this and make sure it doesn't happen again!

 

[RachelsMommie]

I think the biggest hole in the system is that they have a little colored loop that goes around their backpack handle that identifies if they are a walker, car rider, or bus rider. My daughter has thick blonde hair that covers that loop when it's on her back. I think I'm going to talk to them about making larger laminated tags and having a teacher at each door to do a visual check as they go out of the door. Those tags are supposedly what keep each kid from going out the wrong door. But they are so small and apparently they are getting missed.

I am SO thankful nothing happened to her. Her teacher is a first-year teacher and was in tears.

 

[natashag76]

I'm so glad your horrible experience turned out all right in the end. I suggest that you attend your meeting with a list of suggestions for the school. The easier and less expensive they are the more likely they are to be implemented. So perhaps suggest a WRITTEN and POSTED action plan for dismissal and for a lost child (G-d forbid this happens again). Ask if the PTA has money to cough up for walkie talkies. Have the youngest children wear tags that indicate their dismissal plan -bus, walking, carpool, etc. That kind of thing.
Good luck! Please let us know how the meeting goes.

 

[Sammie]

Can you put your daughter's hair in a pony tail for a a few days until she gets used to where she is suppose to be.

Also can you discuss with your daughter where she is suppose to be and that if she gets confused never cross the street, ask a teacher for help.

 

[*NikkiBell*]

I am so, so sorry to hear this. As a fifth grade teacher (who used to teach kindergarten), I can assure you that this is absolutely terrifying to us. I can only imagine what went through your child's teacher's head.

Even though this was an awful, awful thing to happen, try to remain as calm as possible during your meeting tomorrow morning. It will make for a more productive time there. As far as suggestions go, I can't see this ever happening again as a result of this situation. I know in our school PTO volunteers help walk kindergartners to either the parent-pick up line or bus for the first few weeks. Our teachers also buddy them up with another child in their class who is taking the same route home. That seems to help. I do like the loop/badge idea though. Color coding that every staff member knows is a must.

BTW, the fact that the crossing guard (it was a teacher? never heard of that before) did not have a communication tool for emergency situations is absolutely unacceptable. I'd be more upset over that than anything else at this point.

 

[doconeill]

All I can say is,

From what I remember of 1st-4th grade (in K we were bussed as we only had one school in town with K classrooms), when most if not every kid walked to/from school, when leaving school we had three of the 4th graders designated as something like a "front leader", "back leader" and an alternate. Typically they were the kids furthest away, so they'd be the last to break the line. They would make sure everyone who was supposed to be in the line was (to the best of their abilities - they wouldn't necessarily know if someone was out sick), and that no one was in the line that shouldn't have been. Then these "lines" would head out in their appropriate directions.

I was supposed to be the line leader in 4th grade (we had moved, and technically put me in range of a different school but it was close enough that I was able to stay where I was), but I missed the first 3 weeks of class while I was over in England visiting family. And as far as the "taking kids out of school for a vacation" thing goes, it was not a problem for me. I was caught up in just a few days. I was called "The Professor" by my teachers (later shortened to "Doc"). When you are 9 and can explain to your teachers how to pronounce sphygmomanometer, they don't worry about you. At least not that way.

 

[DisneyDoc5]

I am SO sorry this happened, every parents worst nightmare for sure! I have to agree with the other poster with a written plan from the school with what they are going to do to prevent this from happening (they should automatically be doing this without you asking after this happened), a written and posted policy for dismissals that is reviewed with all of the teachers, and yes, cell phones or walkie talkies for anyway working with the kids at the cross walks, etc. Yes these are expensive, but is there a cost for our children's safety? We started a secure building this year with a camera that you have to be buzzed into the building all day long with a locked door. I cannot believe the parents complaining about this inconvenience - who cares, isn't our childrens safety the most important!!!???!!! It takes 1 second to push that button.

I encourage you to be firm and follow up with this problem until action is taken by the school, I think it would be a good way to 'get over' the trauma, and yes, I think that missing a child even for 1 minute takes years off your life. I am so glad you had a good outcome.

 

[Minnie Lor]

Glad that everything ended alright. Very scary situation. Have to say that I'm impressed with the system even though there are some minor flaws that can lead to some major problems.

In our area, a teacher put a little girl on the wrong bus even though her older brother tried to convince the teacher that the little girl should be on the same bus with him. Police had to track down the bus and bring her back to her parents. The parents said that they were pulling their kids from school the next day.

 

[bcvdreamer]

Kristi,

I'm sorry you had to go through that with your daughter.

At our Elem. school the kids in K wear big color coded lanyards with their name, class, bus # etc. Each class is a different color. PTA parents are there to help direct the students the first few days of school. The lanyards help make the K students easy to spot.

Suggest that the PTA buy walkie talkies for everyone involved in the dismissal process. I know our PTA is always replacing broken walkie talkies.

Good luck with your meeting tomorrow.

 

[Madi100]

Wow, how very scary for you. I am not a teacher, just a teacher. I don't like how our dismissal is handled. However, please keep in mind that the teachers and the people at the school are just human beings, and I'm sure they were terrified that your daughter was lost as well. It's like losing your child while you are at the store. We always think that we are watching so closely, but it is so easy for you to turn your back and they walk away.

I think that the suggestion of a larger laminated item is a super idea. That is what our younger grades do. They have yellow school buses or a car on their backpack.

 

[TheTXTaylors5]

Kristi,

I am so sorry to read about your daughter missing. However, I can see how it can happen ...

My children used to attend the Public school up the street from our house. It is walking distance. So, our kids were in the walkers group. In the afternoon, the parents linger outside a side door waiting for the walking kids. Once the kids come out, there is no order to matching the parents to a child. Everyone is going this way and that way and the teachers quickly retreat back into the school.

I would try and get the name of the older child that noticed your child aimlessly walking. In this day and age with everyone doing their own thing, they took the time to speak up. They are a Hero in my book. I am surprised the crossing guard didn't at least have a cell phone with them to contact the school. Our crossing guards are a retired man on one corner and a retired woman on the other corner. They are city employed and not school employed. So, they don't have a walkie talkie to be in contact with the school.

Now my children go to a Charter school, not near our house. So, I have to drive to pick them up. They do afternoon release totally different than the other school. Each parent is given a placard with a number and their child's/children's name on it. There is a drive thru out back. But, if you want to walk-up to pick-up your child, you must still have the placard. Each child is matched to their parent. I feel so much safer with this method than the release of the mass of children and then the teachers quickly retreat inside the building (like their other school).

Now that the school sees a hole in their release system, hopefully they will be more careful hereout. Like someone mentioned, putting your child at the front of the line doesn't resolve the flaw in their system. What about another child led in the wrong direction? Good luck in your meeting.

Jennifer

 

[TheTXTaylors5]

We started a secure building this year with a camera that you have to be buzzed into the building all day long with a locked door.

They have a buzzer at the front office of our children's current school. The whole school is in lock down during the day. It does give me some comfort to know they are safe when not in my protection.

I don't know if they are taking the extra safety precautions because it is a Charter School and they can put the government funds where they know it is needed and not directed by local officials. My children's other school had locked doors except the front office door was unlocked. So, people could walk thru the office into the school. There were numerous times that no one paid any attention to me or questioned me or my business with the school.

We our Charter School!

Jennifer

 

[myweegirls]

So scary. As a parent (not even a teacher or someone working in the school system), I seem to hear these stories at the beginning of every school year. This year, a good friend's daughter - on the first day of first grade in her new school) was put on the bus home. Problem? She should have been put on the bus to her after-school program - no-one was at home. Two frantic parents, one apologizing principal, and one very kind and level-headed bus driver later, everything was sorted out. I like to think that I'd keep my cool in a situation like this, but these are My Kids I'd be talking about, and I just don't know. I'm so glad this turned out well for you.

XO
Liz

 

[WeLoveLilo05]

my DD just started kindergarten too and I just can't even imagine how you feel! LIke you, I am overly protective and I pick DD up from school. Yes, my brother calls me helicopter mom lol. I also just finished student teaching with K, but the district I was at had no bus service at all, so the Kindergarten teachers stood outside with a clipboard and would check off each kid as their parents picked them up.

Anyways, maybe you could suggest having someone (an aide perhaps?) take 2 minutes at the end of the day and walk your DD to the main office and have your hubby meet her in the office and sign her out at the end of the day. This way, she is not to leave the building - period, until a parent arrives to sign her out. LIke you said, who knows what would have happened if one of the older kids didn't pick up on what was going on. Hugs again to you, hope the problem gets resolved and happy to hear that your DD is safe. Keep us updated.

 

[RachelsMommie]

So I met with the principal today. They have totally redone the system and did a practice run at 1:00 today before school dismissal at 3pm.

From now on, all of the car-riders will go to a classroom that is staffed with 3 teachers. When their ride arrives, the teachers will be notified by walkie-talkie to walk the kid down the hall to the car. Also, larger tags will now be instituted so there will be a better visual check at exits. The same system will apply for daycare, bus, etc., just in different classrooms.

Oh, and 2 substitute teachers were FIRED from Frisco ISD. Apparently, one of the failures that occurred was one of the subs was supposed to be out helping kids get into cars and didn't do it. The other sub was supposed to be the line "caboose" (i.e., behind Rachel) and decided it was stupid and went home instead. Yeah, glad they are no longer allowed to teach in Frisco again.

They are actually fixing it, so yeah! And Rachel now has the fear of MOM in her...won't ever leave the building without an adult again. She even freaked out today because she saw kids walking home and said they could get hurt.

Thanks for all of the suggestions and help, you guys!

Oh, and note to Jennifer, I actually did try to get the name of the child who helped Rachel. They don't know who it was, but are going to try to find out. If they find out and his parents allow it, that kiddo is getting a PS3 or Wii or something big as a thank you. Or at least a game or something.

 

[AB6876]

I am so sorry your daughter went through that ordeal, but am very glad they changed the system. My son has just started 1st grade this year, and his school has a similar set up as the one your daughters school just adopted.
It works out well, all the walkers/car riders go to the lunch room, and they have a number that you obtain at the start of the school year (there is help for the little ones to remember their number). You have to have the tag in your car or on you to obtain your child. No children are allowed to leave the school by themselves (even the 5th graders). A parent (or adult you give the card to) will have to present the number card in car line or walker line before the child is released from the building. Car line they have a teacher announcing the numbers via microphone in the parking lot going in order of where you are in line, so your child is waiting at the correct cone for you when you pull up. Walkers go to a different door and present their number to another teacher and the walkers come out that door. It sounds more complicated than it is, and his school is on the larger size, with about 1,000 students that attend (k-5th). Dismissal only takes about 30-40 minutes for the entire school. I love they have this system set up and feel better because of it.