Umm...I'm not married to your son anymore, lady!

[NMAmy]

My ex-MIL has always disliked me (and that's putting it mildly.) Apparently, since my ex and I have divorced, I've become a much better person in her mind and now she dislikes her new daughter-in-law--even though she moved from Michigan to New Mexico to be closer to them.

Imagine my surprise when dd told me that Nana asked if dd thought I'd mind if Nana asked if she could live with me. She misses living in Michigan and she figures she could live in the extra room in our basement. Over my dead body, woman! She was a huge reason that my ex and I moved across the country. Does she really think I'd want her living right downstairs now?

When DH heard this, he said in this appalled voice, "But my office is in the basement!" As if I'd really let her come.

What odd things does your ex MIL do? I know there are some people that adore their MIL's--and I do adore my ex's father and stepmom and they stop by for dinner whenever they're in town. So, I don't dislike EVERYONE in his family, just her.

 

[Quackmore]

If she really asked that then she's got a few screws loose that's for sure. What a "whack job".

My ex-MIL has always disliked me (and that's putting it mildly.) Apparently, since my ex and I have divorced, I've become a much better person in her mind and now she dislikes her new daughter-in-law--even though she moved from Michigan to New Mexico to be closer to them.

Imagine my surprise when dd told me that Nana asked if dd thought I'd mind if Nana asked if she could live with me. She misses living in Michigan and she figures she could live in the extra room in our basement. Over my dead body, woman! She was a huge reason that my ex and I moved across the country. Does she really think I'd want her living right downstairs now?

When DH heard this, he said in this appalled voice, "But my office is in the basement!" As if I'd really let her come.

What odd things does your ex MIL do? I know there are some people that adore their MIL's--and I do adore my ex's father and stepmom and they stop by for dinner whenever they're in town. So, I don't dislike EVERYONE in his family, just her.

 

[LauraR]

I WISH my MIL was an ex....

 

[Poohnatic]

The answer would be "uhhhhhh, NO!"

I have an ex MIL that's the same way. Didn't make my life miserable, but treated me like I wasn't good enough. That changed really quick when he and I split!

Suzanne

 

[Disney1fan2002]

I don't have an ex-MIL, but I have an ex-boyfriend who was a "mama's boy."

His mother, though she acted like she just adored me, came between anything we tried to do. I was a huge threat to her. I couldn't stand it anymore. She was the reason we didn't last. I kept in contact with her, because she was elderly, and he got mixed up in some chick who was on heavy drugs, and what-not. So, of course this is the woman who he finally stood up to his mother for. He ended up moving to FL. I felt bad for her, so I sent her a yearly Christmas card, and would get one in return, always a note about how wonderful Steve was, when I knew he wasn't. When I had kids, I sent her their pictures one year. She lived in a 55-over community, same one where my friend Pam's mother lived. So, I would get update thoughout the year as to how mommy-dearest was doing. The freakiest thing was when Pam told me that her mom was playing cribbage in the community room, lots of the neighbors were there. It was "game night" LOL. The topic got on grandkids. Steve's mom left. She came back and started passing around pictures. Everyone assumed they were her grandkids. When the pictures made it to Pam's mother, she realized they were MY KIDS! Ok, lady's and gents. This woman, by now has her own grandkids. She got back on speaking terms with Steve, but by now he did not live in Fl, he lived in Washington state. So he was still not going back to being a mam's boy.

Why was she passing around my kids pictures, and not her own grandkids? because she WISHED with all her heart those kids were her grandkids. She knew what she lost when she forced me out of Steve's life. As bad as I feel for her, being elderly and her only child is indepentant at the age of 48....LOL...it does give me a little bit of smug satisfaction to know she realizes I might very well have been "the one" for her boy. But at the time, no one was good enough.

 

[kaylajr]

I WISH my MIL was an ex....

Me too

I love my DH i just want to Divorce his Family not him

 

[hugsquared]

LOL, isn't it funny how much better we Ex-DIL's get after the divorce? My 1st MIL hated me (and I'm not kidding). She refused to talk about the wedding, refused to come to any of my showers, made it perfectly clear that I was taking her only son away and she needed him home more than I needed him (My God, we lived right next door to her-he couldn't have gotten any closer unless he crawled right back up in the womb). But when I asked for a divorce the whole thing changed. She came to our house the day I moved out and cried and hugged my neck and told me she loved me
We had been together for 10 years and now on my departure, there is a love fest? I looked at my ex while she was going on and asked out loud, "where is this sudden outpouring of love coming from?".
Shes dead now so I don't have to worry about it but I think I would call her back and tell her your DD told you what she said then begin to laugh hysterically before hanging up.

 

[graygables]

I took my ex MIL out to lunch before she was my ex, to finally tell her some of the things her son had been doing to me (he was abusive) and she said, "That's terrible, whatever you decide to do, I'll support you."

8 weeks later, after he hit me the last time and I left him, she financed his attorney to file for divorce. Some support! I've not seen nor heard from her since and none of that "side" has had any contact with my older 2 DDs in 15 years.

 

[mtblujeans]

I get along with my MIL now....after 19 years of marriage! But, when we first got married, I was not good enough for her youngest son. We went back to the midwest for a 'wedding party' when DS was about 10 days old (I still can't believe I agreed to that). I was nursing and going through all kinds of hormonal changes...UGH.

MIL took me over to her dining room table, when DH went out to visit his high school friends, and pulled out a photo album of pics from when DH was in high school. She proceeded to show me the girl she "always hoped he would marry"! I could not believe my ears!! But, she was also pointing at the girl to make sure I could see her!!

When DH got back, he did not believe that his mother would be that mean spirited ~ do they ever believe us when the evil starts???

That was just the beginning. Dear Mom did not seem to realize that she was setting the tone for the way his sisters would treat me! When things became the worst between myself and DHs oldest sister, MIL seemed to suddenly wake up to what she had been doing all those years and she completely turned around. We get along just fine, now, and she has come out several summers, over the years, and stayed with us. DHs sister, is another story altogether.....

 

[mickeysgal]

Imagine my surprise when dd told me that Nana asked if dd thought I'd mind if Nana asked if she could live with me. She misses living in Michigan and she figures she could live in the extra room in our basement.

She must have been sarcastically joking. Kids aren't always able to pick up on that kind of humor.

 

[NMAmy]

She must have been sarcastically joking. Kids aren't always able to pick up on that kind of humor.

Umm...no, she wasn't. DD is 15 and is quite aware of her grandmother's many changes of heart. When dd was a child, this woman insisted on dd calling her by her first name and didn't want any part of being a grandmother and treated dd like crap. Now, dd is kind to her because Nana is being treated for depression and other psychological issues even though she was mean to dd as a child, she adores the kid as a teenager. DD says she goes on and on now about what a wonderful person I am when we all know good and well she couldn't stand to be in the same room with me when I was married to her precious son.

 

[jbdreamer]

Imagine my surprise when dd told me that Nana asked if dd thought I'd mind if Nana asked if she could live with me. She misses living in Michigan and she figures she could live in the extra room in our basement. Over my dead body, woman!

I wouldn't let my own mother live in basement, much less my EX-mother in law!

Is she nuts?!

What did your DD say when 'Nana' asked this?

 

[Microcell]

So I have to divorce Dh to feel like I belong to the family? I had not thought of that!

 

[NMAmy]

What did your DD say when 'Nana' asked this?

Well, I think dd was in shock at first. Then she said, "I don't really think my mom would go for that." Nana then told dd that she thought dd should ask me about it. Nana is going through a rough time right now--she recently divorced her fifth husband and her father (yes, dd's GREAT grandfather) is supporting her because her business went under. And, yes, I feel badly for her but not badly enough to want her in my basement. I notice her own son isn't asking her to move in with HIM!

And I'm with you, jbdreamer--my OWN mom wouldn't dream of living in my basement. Although if she needed it, I'd give her a room upstairs. Because she's mostly nice to me.

 

[mtblujeans]

...And, yes, I feel badly for her but not badly enough to want her in my basement....

Sounds like a Halloween horror movie....with your family as the horrified cast!

 

[helenk]

My ex-husband does not speak to his mother, they had a fight a few years back and he refuses to call her, no matter how many times she has called to try and make up. He has been a real jerk, and now she realizes it too.
Any way when my ex and I were married of course I was no good, did not keep a clean house, spent too much money blah blah blah.
now that her son does not speak to her, my mother and my sister have kind of adopted my ex mother in law, as she is a widow and is 85 years old and does not drive. My family makes sure she is taken care of visits her when she is in the hospital. The last hospital stay we thought she was not going to make it, I even had my children call their father to let him know she may pass away, but he still did not come to the hospital and in fact never called later to see how she made out.
She still refers to me as her daughter in law and tells the doctors and nurses that she does not know what she would do without me and my family. She has even made me co-executor of her estate along with my son, her grandson. She has cut her son out of her will.
I feel bad for her, but we did not get along when I was married to her son and honestly I still do not care for her, but my family just does not feel right abandoning her. And no matter how I feel about her I just think it has been wrong for her son to not call her, she really needs him at this time of her life and he has just written her off.