Umm...I am in absolute SHOCK, it has been quite the week UPDATE!!!

[3mtn-kate]

the things thats really just sickening to me is that the guy that *possibly* got my friend pregnant was a guy who would routinely hit on ME in gym and tell me how much he liked my clothes (i wear shorts to gym a lot but i do NOT invite this kind of thing)
and he tried to break up me and my boyfriend...she seems fine and i haven't heard anything either way but now the guy is just back to his old tricks trying to hit on me and i've just had it.

 

[sexymickey]

I think aortion is disgusting what if your mom aborted you??? you would never exist and you would never meet your friends or boyfriends! giving up a life is awful its murder - i know the baby isnt properly alive but it could be in the future and it could be a great person like you or your friend(s)

 

[saratogadreamin09]

How can someone fake being 3 months pregnant? Is she not starting to show? I thought you said she told her parents? That's ridiculous. Kids these days...

Nevertheless, I can't believe people are telling you what you should 'tell' her to do. If she was pregnant, then the only person who can make the decisions is herself.

Foster care is NOT something you should put a baby in. They're moved around from home to home and shelter to shelter with few people giving them actual attention. I know there are a lot of great foster homes out there, but the system is so screwed up. If they aren't adopted, they're just kicked out the day they turn 18 with no help from the state.

Adoption is always a great choice, if you are in control of the situation. You can find a great couple/person to adopt and oversee the whole thing, so the baby wouldn't have to be put in foster care.

Abortion is also a woman's choice. A 14 year old girl is most likely not capable of really undergoing pregnancy. Hips aren't wide enough yet, the girl is not fully mature, etc. Pregnancy/labor could really affect the girl's health.

Anyway, hopefully your friend was just faking!

If you aren't ready to get pregnant then dont have sex!

 

[imabrat]

How can someone fake being 3 months pregnant? Is she not starting to show? I thought you said she told her parents? That's ridiculous. Kids these days...

Nevertheless, I can't believe people are telling you what you should 'tell' her to do. If she was pregnant, then the only person who can make the decisions is herself.

Foster care is NOT something you should put a baby in. They're moved around from home to home and shelter to shelter with few people giving them actual attention. I know there are a lot of great foster homes out there, but the system is so screwed up. If they aren't adopted, they're just kicked out the day they turn 18 with no help from the state.

Adoption is always a great choice, if you are in control of the situation. You can find a great couple/person to adopt and oversee the whole thing, so the baby wouldn't have to be put in foster care.

Abortion is also a woman's choice. A 14 year old girl is most likely not capable of really undergoing pregnancy. Hips aren't wide enough yet, the girl is not fully mature, etc. Pregnancy/labor could really affect the girl's health.

Anyway, hopefully your friend was just faking!

Well said, Jenny.

Honestly, I would rather my baby be dead and in the arms of God than alive and jumping from foster care home to foster care home with no true sense of "home". At least if they are aborted they will have a "home" in the arms of God.
But, that's just me. I REFUSE to let an innocent child into a home where I cannot provide for the child financially, emotionally, and/or otherwise.

PS - God FORBID the child is born disabled and goes into adoption. Does anyone even know the chances of a severely disabled child getting adopted? I'll tell you - slim to none. I guarantee you if you ever go to an adoption agency the children that have been there the longest will be the ones who have some sort of debilitating birth defect.

 

[notokay]

oh please no! please please please do anything and everything you can before doing this. I heard that once a woman did this and after she did it she was so sad that she murdered her child she wanted to kill herself.

That's a ploy the pro-lifers use to get people on their side, they get them to think it causes long-term emotional damage. I think it would be far more emotionally (and physically) damaging for a 14yro to go through with the pregnancy.

 

[imabrat]

I think aortion is disgusting what if your mom aborted you??? you would never exist and you would never meet your friends or boyfriends! giving up a life is awful its murder - i know the baby isnt properly alive but it could be in the future and it could be a great person like you or your friend(s)

If my mom aborted me I would know she would be doing a selfless act - letting me be safe and cared for in Heaven than unsafe and not well-cared-for in her home.

Life is about making sacrifices and learning lessons - if you can't take the heat get out of the kitchen.

 

[notokay]

Well said, Jenny.

Honestly, I would rather my baby be dead and in the arms of God than alive and jumping from foster care home to foster care home with no true sense of "home". At least if they are aborted they will have a "home" in the arms of God.
But, that's just me. I REFUSE to let an innocent child into a home where I cannot provide for the child financially, emotionally, and/or otherwise.

What an intelligent post, kudos to you. =]

 

[saratogadreamin09]

If my mom aborted me I would know she would be doing a selfless act - letting me be safe and cared for in Heaven than unsafe and not well-cared-for in her home.

Life is about making sacrifices and learning lessons - if you can't take the heat get out of the kitchen.

IMO, abortion is selfish. When you get an abortion you are killing a life to make yours easier

 

[BabyPiglet]

IMO, abortion is selfish. When you get an abortion you are killing a life to make yours easier

No, you are letting that life go because you know they'd just have a life of heartache. It's selfless. You could be selfish and keep the baby, even though you have no way of giving it the financial or emotional support it needs. It's truly a sacrifice.

 

[saratogadreamin09]

No, you are letting that life go because you know they'd just have a life of heartache. It's selfless. You could be selfish and keep the baby, even though you have no way of giving it the financial or emotional support it needs. It's truly a sacrifice.

Your selfish if you choose to keep a kid and destroy your own life? Thes best choice for a teen mother is adoption, that way the child can go to a good home and it doesnt have to die.Yes raising a child is a sacrafice, but its not selfish

 

[BabyPiglet]

Your selfish if you choose to keep a kid and destroy your own life? Thes best choice for a teen mother is adoption, that way the child can go to a good home and it doesnt have to die.Yes raising a child is a sacrafice, but its not selfish

You're selfish if you have a baby anyways even though you know you can't financially support it and it would have a life riddled with malnutrition and emotional instability.

The best choice for a teen mother to do is talk with their parents and choose the best option for their situation. That could be abortion, adoption, or keeping/raising the baby with the proper support.

You or me cannot make a decision for them, because we're not in their shoes.

Also, adoption is not all unicorns and daisies like it is in the movies. Often they'll be put in foster care while they wait for an adoptive family. Adoption could take YEARS.

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Not to butt in, but I believe the original point of the thread was for the OP to vent about her friend, not to discuss abortion vs. adoption.

Katie, I can't tell you what to tell your friend. All I can say is to just support her through whatever decision she may make, be it adoption, abortion, or keeping the baby.

 

[imabrat]

Your selfish if you choose to keep a kid and destroy your own life? Thes best choice for a teen mother is adoption, that way the child can go to a good home and it doesnt have to die.Yes raising a child is a sacrafice, but its not selfish

You're selfish when you keep a baby that has absolutely 0% chance at a loving and productive childhood.
Children are not "life-destroyers" as you so kindly put it - children are blessings. Only those who are faced with the chance of infertility would realize that I suppose. Raising a child is a sacrifice? Are you kidding me?

You cannot decide what's best for each and every pregnancy.

 

[BabyPiglet]

The sacrifice I was talking about was the loss of a child.

I agree, Sonya. Children are completely a blessing.

 

[AmandaSparks730]

You're selfish when you keep a baby that has absolutely 0% chance at a loving and productive childhood.
Children are not "life-destroyers" as you so kindly put it - children are blessings. Only those who are faced with the chance of infertility would realize that I suppose. Raising a child is a sacrifice? Are you kidding me?

You cannot decide what's best for each and every pregnancy.

What if the child were to have some life-threatening disease, and you *knew* that they weren't going to live long? What if you knew *you* couldn't survive the pregnancy, let alone the labor and delivery? So then the child would be motherless anyway.

I'm pro-choice, so...*shrug*

 

[3mtn-kate]

Not to butt in, but I believe the original point of the thread was for the OP to vent about her friend, not to discuss abortion vs. adoption.

Katie, I can't tell you what to tell your friend. All I can say is to just support her through whatever decision she may make, be it adoption, abortion, or keeping the baby.

yeah it was...i'm sorry i didn't want to make this a big like controversial thread i just wanted to vent a little bit, i haven't posted in a while...

 

[saratogadreamin09]

You're selfish when you keep a baby that has absolutely 0% chance at a loving and productive childhood.
Children are not "life-destroyers" as you so kindly put it - children are blessings. Only those who are faced with the chance of infertility would realize that I suppose. Raising a child is a sacrifice? Are you kidding me?

You cannot decide what's best for each and every pregnancy.

I agree that children are absolute blessings, but most people that go to get abortions go because they belive the child will destroy their life.

I still dont get how a person can be selfish if they choose to keep a child in their teens, you have to be selfless to be a mother.



OP, Im sorry about your friends and I hope everythng starts to go better

 

[imabrat]

I agree that children are absolute blessings, but most people that go to get abortions go because they belive the child will destroy their life.

I still dont get how a person can be selfish if they choose to keep a child in their teens, you have to be selfless to be a mother.



OP, Im sorry about your friends and I hope everythng starts to go better

Well, again, that's an assumption. Some people actually do get abortions because they know they will not be able to provide that child with a life the child should have - IE vacations, quality schooling, love, a stable home, etc. If that's not selfless than I don't know what it is.

Most teenage mothers are high school drop-outs in an unstable home with little to no income. If you choose to raise your child in a love-less, unstable, unhealthy home, then yes I do consider that selfish.

Katie, if this girl is infact faking her pregnancy, she needs help. In the mental sense that is.

 

[BabyPiglet]

I agree that children are absolute blessings, but most people that go to get abortions go because they belive the child will destroy their life.

I still dont get how a person can be selfish if they choose to keep a child in their teens, you have to be selfless to be a mother.



OP, Im sorry about your friends and I hope everythng starts to go better

You're selfish because you know that the child would grow up riddled with malnutrition and emotional instability. Like I've said before, many times.

Once again, I know not all teenagers are unable to provide for a child, but most are.

 

[saratogadreamin09]

Well, again, that's an assumption. Some people actually do get abortions because they know they will not be able to provide that child with a life the child should have - IE vacations, quality schooling, love, a stable home, etc. If that's not selfless than I don't know what it is.

Most teenage mothers are high school drop-outs in an unstable home with little to no income. If you choose to raise your child in a love-less, unstable, unhealthy home, then yes I do consider that selfish.

Katie, if this girl is infact faking her pregnancy, she needs help. In the mental sense that is.

If a teen mother chooses to raise there child then there also giving themselves a bad life. Can we just please agree that its a bit selfish and a bit selfless