Tucson Memorial Service

[Jennasis]

You do know that there are many people across the country who were uncomfortable with the tone of the "memorial" service? In my "real" life everyone I have spoken to about it thought it was odd and or inappropriate. Does that make us right or wrong? Neither.... it's an opinion.

No really? I hadn't noticed...

In my "real" life, those I've spoken to about it thought it was lovely and uplifting. So where does that put us? Just differing in opinion, it would seem eh?

And you didn't answer the question about the funeral...bikers with wings Okay or inappropriate for the solemnity of the occasion? For me, they were a-okay. I know Westboro backed out because of the air-time offered elsewhere and not because of the "angels", but it was still a lovely gesture for them to show up just in case.

 

[ICF]

In my "real" life, those I've spoken to about it thought it was lovely and uplifting.

mine too

 

[eliza61]

Unless they were somehow directly related to someone involved in the event, then it didn't happen to the University of Arizona students. Just as, simply because I'm an Oklahoman, doesn't mean the Murrah bombing happened to me. It happened to the family and friends of the victims, and even though the entire community may be shocked and saddened, the priority should go to those who were directly affected. Were they asked what kind of public memorial service they would like to have? I don't know. But, if just ONE loved one was hurt by the tone or behavior of the crowd, then the opinion that the behavior was inappropriate becomes valid.
Exactly! This isn't about right or wrong, it's about opinion and perception. If the families come out and say they loved the service and thought the cheering was uplifting and helpful, I will immediately amend my position and understand that it may have been appropriate in that situation. However, as I said above, if only one loved one was hurt or offended, then the inappropriateness of the service becomes a valid point. I personally believe in erring on the side of caution, and not taking the chance of hurting someone. Others believe they should be able to act however they please. Depending on the situation, either one may be correct. But, in my opinion in a mass service like this, the differing feelings of the many loved ones should have all been respected. We should also show more respect to those who have a differing opinion than our own. There is no need for snarkiness.

and that's my point. You don't know. you have no way of knowing how the felt. so you can't say if their feelings were not respected.
So until I hear that someone outside of internet bloggers say they felt disrespected my opinion is just as valid. It was a joyous, uplifting, inspirational service. And the tone of the young adults there were refreshing from the usual somber cryfest.

So in what way is it disrespectful?

I am just seriously trying to understand how

clapping & cheering = disrespect
weeping, crying and being depressed= respect.

It sounds like the out of a bible story where in order to show respect for the dead mourners had to rend their clothes and beat themselves with lashes?

 

[Owlpost23]

So the thing was depressing enough? Wasn't sad enough? Wasn't somber enough?

Frankly I can think of no greater tribute to the deceased than to raise the spirits of those who remain behind.

Beautifully put. Let people have a reason for joy in the midst of all the heartache.

 

[Owlpost23]

I thought it was a great event and a great speech. If I was a relative of a victim I would have appreciated the dedications and positive response.

Yes!

 

[disney1990]

From the President's speech yesterday:

Christina was given to us on September 11th, 2001, one of 50 babies born that day to be pictured in a book called "Faces of Hope." On either side of her photo in that book were simple wishes for a child's life. "I hope you help those in need," read one. "I hope you know all of the words to the National Anthem and sing it with your hand over your heart. I hope you jump in rain puddles."

If there are rain puddles in heaven, Christina is jumping in them today. And here on Earth, we place our hands over our hearts, and commit ourselves as Americans to forging a country that is forever worthy of her gentle, happy spirit.​

I understand the city needed to stop crying.... I understand they wanted to celebrate the heroes.... but selling tshirts at this event (or giving them away) is in poor taste to say the least.

This was something that the University decided to do. The shirts were meant to go with the program that was handed out.

I, too, disagree with the yelling, but I can't control how the mostly college aged students reacted.

 

[sand2270]

Having lived in Tucson since I was four...I would not have screamed, etc. However...that is me.

Last night's reactions at the service was classic Tucson, that is not a criticism nor a praise of my home town...that is just the town Tucson is. I would not have expected people to sit quietly, that is not this town. Good or bad, that is how we chose to participate in the memorial service.

The funeral today took place down the street from my house, about 2 miles away. I drive past that church every morning and this morning saw the news trucks already gathering. My daughter and I eat at restaurants across the street from where the shooting took place. My mom used to work at a place across the street. Tucson is a small town, the uncle of the little girl works at the same place I do. This city really is a small world, and no matter what happens in Tucson it seems to find it's way back to you personally somehow.

So while I would not have screamed and yelled, we are doing the best we can as a town to get through this.

 

[auntie]

I think there should have been a Memorial Service for the victims. What I saw last night was definitely not that. If my family member was killed in that shooting, I would not want to hear applause and cheering. It is wonderful that Gifford can open her eyes, but imagine how you would feel if you were that little girl's mother and there was no hope for you at all. A rally for America could have been held at another time.

I had to turn it off. This was NOT a memorial service.

Gabby Giffords is alive and that is fabulous- but 6 others were not so lucky- it's almost like the folks at the rally didn't want to talk about those who died but only about Giffords miraculous survival.

My family is from Tucson. My dad and mom are U of A alum.

I know the city was torn by this- Tucson, just doesn't see this kind of craziness.

But the event was billed as a memorial service. I think the students/public/whoever took it a bit far with the cheering. To be fair- this also happened to Obama with the Ft. Hood memorial. People there were whooping and hollering when he came out as well.

I don't get it. Why can't people show the dead a little more respect?

I do understand the need for healing and for moving forward. I totally get the cheers for the intern and the medical staff. But it still sat wrong with me (and it seems a lot of Americans feel this way) It's a shame. Tucson is wonderful- the people are wonderful. I'm sorry the circumstances made it look otherwise with this pep rally.

I agree with the above sentiments. I had to turn the coverage off. My family was gathered in the living room last night awaiting the President's address to the nation from Arizona. We all looked at one another in disbelief. It was indeed more like a pep rally than a memorial service. I was very taken a back by the cheering and shouting, and thought it was very strange. I "get" that people mourn differently and there isn't a right or wrong way. That being said, I can only speak for my family and say it sure wasn't our way. We did turn it off. We thought it was inappropriate and frankly somewhat disturbing. We are no stranger to tragedy. We live in a suburb of NYC, and were touched very personally by the horrors of 9-11. We still live with the ramifications of that day, as do so many of our fellow New Yorkers. While I truly sympathize with the people of Arizona and Tucson, I was uncomfortable with the way this became an "event" rather than a rememberance of those who were lost. It certainly wasn't what we were looking for from our President.
During moments like this, I can't help but think of the way then Presdient Bill Clinton comforted the people of Oklahoma City, and the nation after that horrible event. Even the Rev. Billy Graham commented that he should consider another line of work in that his words were comforting and eloquent. Clinton's manner and his demeanor were exactly what a wounded people needed to hear. This was yet again demonstrated after the tragedy in Columbine. Sadly, I didn't see or hear anything nearly resembling that in the words spoken last night. (not meant as a political statement, but merely a comparison of tone during similiar incidents of tragic circumstances.)



____________________

 

[Karibeth19]

and that's my point. You don't know. you have no way of knowing how the felt. so you can't say if their feelings were not respected.
So until I hear that someone outside of internet bloggers say they felt disrespected my opinion is just as valid. It was a joyous, uplifting, inspirational service. And the tone of the young adults there were refreshing from the usual somber cryfest.

So in what way is it disrespectful?

I am just seriously trying to understand how

clapping & cheering = disrespect
weeping, crying and being depressed= respect.

It sounds like the out of a bible story where in order to show respect for the dead mourners had to rend their clothes and beat themselves with lashes?

But, that's my point as well...you have no way of knowing either, so you don't know that they didn't feel disrespected. This argument can just keep going round and round and round. As I said before, we will just have to agree to disagree. You believe that people should act however they feel, and that's your opinion. I believe that if I don't know how my behavior is going to affect someone, I'm going to temper it to make sure I don't offend, and that's my opinion. Other posters have shared my opinion, so I am obviously not the only one who feels this way. We are all entitled to our opinions, and I'm not going argue the issue anymore.

 

[Wall-E1]

I agree with the above sentiments. I had to turn the coverage off. My family was gathered in the living room last night awaiting the President's address to the nation from Arizona. We all looked at one another in disbelief. It was indeed more like a pep rally than a memorial service. I was very taken a back by the cheering and shouting, and thought it was very strange. I "get" that people mourn differently and there isn't a right or wrong way. That being said, I can only speak for my family and say it sure wasn't our way. We did turn it off. We thought it was inappropriate and frankly somewhat disturbing. We are no stranger to tragedy. We live in a suburb of NYC, and were touched very personally by the horrors of 9-11. We still live with the ramifications of that day, as do so many of our fellow New Yorkers. While I truly sympathize with the people of Arizona and Tucson, I was uncomfortable with the way this became an "event" rather than a rememberance of those who were lost. It certainly wasn't what we were looking for from our President.
During moments like this, I can't help but think of the way then Presdient Bill Clinton comforted the people of Oklahoma City, and the nation after that horrible event. Even the Rev. Billy Graham commented that he should consider another line of work in that his words were comforting and eloquent. Clinton's manner and his demeanor were exactly what a wounded people needed to hear. This was yet again demonstrated after the tragedy in Columbine. Sadly, I didn't see or hear anything nearly resembling that in the words spoken last night. (not meant as a political statement, but merely a comparison of tone during similiar incidents of tragic circumstances.)

I'm confused. You state that you chose to turn off his speech, but then you state that his speech didn't measure up to speeches given at Oklahoma City or Columbine. If you didn't listen to the speech, how would you know this?

 

[eduk8r26]

It's too bad people chose to turn off the President's speech. What I heard of it (I missed the beginning) was very moving. Watching the news tonight, the newscasters said many Republicans said it was the best speech he had given so far. And contrary to what I have read, I did not see the President smiling while speaking about the victims.

 

[justhat]

Having lived in Tucson since I was four...I would not have screamed, etc. However...that is me.

Last night's reactions at the service was classic Tucson, that is not a criticism nor a praise of my home town...that is just the town Tucson is. I would not have expected people to sit quietly, that is not this town. Good or bad, that is how we chose to participate in the memorial service.

The funeral today took place down the street from my house, about 2 miles away. I drive past that church every morning and this morning saw the news trucks already gathering. My daughter and I eat at restaurants across the street from where the shooting took place. My mom used to work at a place across the street. Tucson is a small town, the uncle of the little girl works at the same place I do. This city really is a small world, and no matter what happens in Tucson it seems to find it's way back to you personally somehow.

So while I would not have screamed and yelled, we are doing the best we can as a town to get through this.

Excellently stated. You are so accurate with your description of this just being Tucson. Tucsonians are a friendly, laid-back bunch and this event shook the city as a whole. The reactions were not meant as a sign of disrespect to anyone, but I saw them as signs of support for the families and the town as a whole.

And also, so right on with this town being a small world. It truly is. We meet people all over who either have kids in school with our kids (and ours go to a charter school, so not just like they're from the neighborhood), parents from the school who work with my husband, run into people from work/school/church at the grocery store, mall, baseball registration, Christmas tree shopping, the library, etc. So in some way it does feel like everyone and everything here is connected.

We also eat at restaurants in that intersection and live very close to that mall (we're in the Foothills) and we belong to the church where the judge's funeral will be. So it all definitely hits close to home, even for those not directly involved in the tragedy.

 

[justhat]

That doesn't explain it.

Contrast the behavior last night with those of the college students at Virginia Tech who attended a real memorial service that was held after the massacre there in 2007 - where there was also a Presidential address and a national spotlight.

The VA tech students didn't cheer and holler.

No one was putting on "event-themed" T shirts.

This is what you saw:

You realize everyone in these pictures has VT shirts on, right? How is that different than the t-shirts given out from U of A?

 

[sand2270]

Excellently stated. You are so accurate with your description of this just being Tucson. Tucsonians are a friendly, laid-back bunch and this event shook the city as a whole. The reactions were not meant as a sign of disrespect to anyone, but I saw them as signs of support for the families and the town as a whole.

And also, so right on with this town being a small world. It truly is. We meet people all over who either have kids in school with our kids (and ours go to a charter school, so not just like they're from the neighborhood), parents from the school who work with my husband, run into people from work/school/church at the grocery store, mall, baseball registration, Christmas tree shopping, the library, etc. So in some way it does feel like everyone and everything here is connected.

We also eat at restaurants in that intersection and live very close to that mall (we're in the Foothills) and we belong to the church where the judge's funeral will be. So it all definitely hits close to home, even for those not directly involved in the tragedy.

Thank you

My DD goes to a charter school as well...who knows our kids may be classmates. There is that small world thing again.

 

[Disneycrazymom]

I personally also found it inappropriate. More about the president than about the families. Apparently they are going to allow people to buy the t shirts.

http://www.kvoa.com/news/ua-taking-requests-for-memorial-t-shirts/

I would like to know 2 things:
1. How were tickets given out for this event? Was it "political"
2. Where will the money go from the sale of these shirts?

 

[justhat]

I personally also found it inappropriate. More about the president than about the families. Apparently they are going to allow people to buy the t shirts.

http://www.kvoa.com/news/ua-taking-requests-for-memorial-t-shirts/

I would like to know 2 things:
1. How were tickets given out for this event? Was it "political"
2. Where will the money go from the sale of these shirts?

1) From what they said here, though I have 3 small kids so I couldn't go, it was first come, first serve for the memorial. They announced on TV that the doors opened at 4pm, but if you were planning to go, get there early to allow time to park and shuttle over the the McHale Center and go through increased security.

2) What does it matter to you? Don't buy one if you don't want, but who cares where the money is going. I could care less if U of A is getting the money, if KVOA is, if it's going to a victims fund, whatever. Whoever decided to make the shirts and sell them has that right to decide. Sure, it would be very nice if the money is going to a victims fund, and it likely is, but it really isn't my decision as I didn't come up with the idea to make shirts, nor did I spend the money buying and printing them.

 

[eduk8r26]

As far as I know, you just got in line to get in. My neice goes to UofA and she waited in line for a few hours to get in. I do not feel it was political at all. Everyone is saying that the President's speech was the best he's given so far. Even the Republicans are praising it.

 

[justhat]

Thank you

My DD goes to a charter school as well...who knows our kids may be classmates. There is that small world thing again.

Wouldn't that be something!? I am sure we've seen you at that Chipotle and never known it. We've got a DCL magnet on our car, so keep your eye out!