TTC thread take 2

[tinytreasures]

Congrats jenm2878 I am so excited for all my friends here.

Welcome Jennifer

We are doing better today. Bear came back in a great mood and is the old baby we know and love. He is full of giggles and snuggles. It is like his last gift to us. He has been so grumpy since he started visits 2 weeks ago. The kids all said their goodbyes tonight but they are taking it just fine.
Thanks for the support.

 

[Kennywife]

AF is here after five months of being gone. Needless to say, I'm happy to see her, yet.... the pain!!!!!

Sorry for whining. I can't get comfortable. Nothing helps.

Gabbie

 

[MommaSnowwhite]

Sorry Gabbie!

 

[cherbear]

AF is here after five months of being gone. Needless to say, I'm happy to see her, yet.... the pain!!!!!

Sorry for whining. I can't get comfortable. Nothing helps.

Gabbie

I feel ya hun! Mine were no fun after 2 1/2 month long span...I can't imagine 5.

 

[cherbear]

Cheri - it looks like we might be doing our first IVF at the same time (April). We will probably do our 3rd and final IUI early next week and assuming that doesn't work, we are moving onto IVF immediately as my RE doesn't think injectibles/IUI will work as my endo history indicates IVF is more promising. Hopefully it will be lucky for both of us! At least we can cheer one another on!

it would be great to have a cycle buddy!! HOWEVER...I hope that your last IUI gives you your miracle so that you WON'T have to go through IVF at all!

Thank you for your welcome. i am so sorry that your insurance does not cover your IF treatments.

Our insurance covers 50% but on selective things. I wish ins would cover more.

I used to post on the bump on the IF boards but all the girls that were on when I was have all graduated. I really do not fit as well with the new group. I am just looking for more support through this process. It also helps that we all love Disney.


Congrats to the BFP's!

my insurance doesn't pay diddly squat. They only cover "infertility testing" and even some of that wasn't covered -- ie. after I started doing TREATMENT, any tests I had they decided not to pay for...even though I still needed FURTHER testing.

And yes, Disney is our common bond here! We will all be taking our little ones there someday.

Thank you, I am on met 2k mg a day as well. What did you do to lose the 30lbs? I wanted to start a C25K but I broke my toe this weekend I was wondering if it was a sign.

c25k?

ugh, which toe? That HAS to hurt!

 

[cc1013]

AF is here after five months of being gone. Needless to say, I'm happy to see her, yet.... the pain!!!!!

Sorry for whining. I can't get comfortable. Nothing helps.

Gabbie

OUCH! I hope you can rest and relax for the next few days!

 

[cc1013]

it would be great to have a cycle buddy!! HOWEVER...I hope that your last IUI gives you your miracle so that you WON'T have to go through IVF at all!



my insurance doesn't pay diddly squat. They only cover "infertility testing" and even some of that wasn't covered -- ie. after I started doing TREATMENT, any tests I had they decided not to pay for...even though I still needed FURTHER testing.

And yes, Disney is our common bond here! We will all be taking our little ones there someday.

c25k?

ugh, which toe? That HAS to hurt!

Thanks for the good wishes on this last IUI cycle. I hope we get a miracle too!!!

Insurance can be such a pain. We have coverage through my employers HMO offering, but that might be discontinued in April of 2012. That is another reason why my doc advised us to proceed with the IVF and forego injectables/IUI. I'm on our benefits counsel and the premium increase that the insurance company tried to push this year was just ridiculous. Luckily we were able to negotiate them down, but I don't know if we will be as successful next year. The alternative plan is our self-insured PPO, which only offers testing, like your plan.

I did see an article today indicating that the new healthcare bill hasn't addressed infertility coverage and it's currently being debated. Hopefully we will see some coverage improvement in the future!

 

[villain luvr]

my insurance doesn't pay diddly squat. They only cover "infertility testing" and even some of that wasn't covered -- ie. after I started doing TREATMENT, any tests I had they decided not to pay for...even though I still needed FURTHER testing.

And yes, Disney is our common bond here! We will all be taking our little ones there someday.



c25k?

ugh, which toe? That HAS to hurt!

Couch to 5k. I broke the one closest to the big toe.

 

[cherbear]

I did see an article today indicating that the new healthcare bill hasn't addressed infertility coverage and it's currently being debated. Hopefully we will see some coverage improvement in the future!

you mean they are actually TALKING about Infertility?? I doubt anything will come of it. I guess I'm a glass-half-empty kinda girl when it comes to this stuff...

What they REALLY need to do is stop funding abortions -- and start telling those girls that their only options are to pay for it themselves, or be matched up with an infertile couple on the adoption list so that someone else who really WANTS a baby can adopt that little sweet bundle!

 

[villain luvr]

you mean they are actually TALKING about Infertility?? I doubt anything will come of it. I guess I'm a glass-half-empty kinda girl when it comes to this stuff...

What they REALLY need to do is stop funding abortions -- and start telling those girls that their only options are to pay for it themselves, or be matched up with an infertile couple on the adoption list so that someone else who really WANTS a baby can adopt that little sweet bundle!

I agree with you completly. I think that there also needs to be more education about IF. Maybe then they would do something about it. All the celebs that use ART and then deny it. I am sure there are a few there in the gov't that have delt with it as well. I guess they brush it off because they have the money or it was paid for, for them.

 

[cc1013]

I agree with you completly. I think that there also needs to be more education about IF. Maybe then they would do something about it. All the celebs that use ART and then deny it. I am sure there are a few there in the gov't that have delt with it as well. I guess they brush it off because they have the money or it was paid for, for them.

The argument against coverage was that it is not a "life-sustaining treatment." Come on! With that argument, how is Viagra covered?

I firmly believe that the decision-makers (generally middle-aged caucasian men) don't see infertility as an issue in their lives. So it just takes a back seat. Perhaps viagra is a different story.......

 

[cc1013]

you mean they are actually TALKING about Infertility?? I doubt anything will come of it. I guess I'm a glass-half-empty kinda girl when it comes to this stuff...

What they REALLY need to do is stop funding abortions -- and start telling those girls that their only options are to pay for it themselves, or be matched up with an infertile couple on the adoption list so that someone else who really WANTS a baby can adopt that little sweet bundle!

Hopefully they will talk about it! Who knows where it will go. I'm also of the same glass-half-empty feeling..........

 

[villain luvr]

The argument against coverage was that it is not a "life-sustaining treatment." Come on! With that argument, how is Viagra covered?

I firmly believe that the decision-makers (generally middle-aged caucasian men) don't see infertility as an issue in their lives. So it just takes a back seat. Perhaps viagra is a different story.......

I agree. I do not see viagra as being a need for coverage as well. I just think if it was made more public an aware that it would get more then a once over.

 

[villain luvr]

I am sorry if you do not agree. I just wish IF was more talked about. Do your family, friends, coworkers know about your struggles with IF? I am out and open. I like to educate people about it.

 

[cc1013]

Do your family, friends, coworkers know about your struggles with IF? I am out and open. I like to educate people about it.

We have told a small group of people about our struggles. Overall, we are being very selective with who we tell. Some days, I just don't want to talk about it and other days I do. Luckily, our inner-circle of friends/family knows and have been incredibly supportive. Our RE said that we should do whatever we feel most comfortable with. She told us that it's our story and nobody has a right to know unless we decide to include them. We've really taken that to heart, which has been helpful because when we get disappointing news, I don't want everyone to know. Those that I rely on for support know and with others, it's nice to have some normalcy.

My brother-in-law (DH's brother)is an Ob/Gyn and both he and his wife like to pry a lot. We rarely talk with them and when we do, they start asking a lot of (what I consider to be) very inappropriate questions. At this point, they have no idea what is going on and we prefer to keep it that way. We haven't told any of DH's family because we aren't close with them and don't want it getting back to his DB & wife. That would just add a whole level of stress that we would like to avoid.

 

[villain luvr]

I know we started out very private, but as time went on and people started to ask I just got tired of making up excuses are saying we are not ready. I just finally let everyone know and now we do not get as many questions actually no one asks any more. I think they are also more sensitive to what we are going through. I have no problem in telling them any thing as long as they ask. I just dont call everyone when something happens but if they ask I let them know. I really do not have a close group of people that I can talk to. I have a few girls from another message board and that is it. But they all have there babies now. It is not like they do not care or do not know what I am going through I just think that they are busy.

 

[cherbear]

I am sorry if you do not agree. I just wish IF was more talked about. Do your family, friends, coworkers know about your struggles with IF? I am out and open. I like to educate people about it.

oh I wish it were not so "taboo"....I think that there are so many people who don't even REALIZE that some couples just canNOT get pregnant on their own. Yes, I do think there is THAT much ignorance out there...

I hate..HATE when people make jokes about their "boys can swim" or that their "husband just looks at me and I get pregnant". I don't think there'd be as much of that kind of talk happening if people were made more aware.

So to touch on "who knows" issue....My BFF has known since we were TTC for 5 months; I told my boss before we embarked on our 3rd IUI because it was getting too hard to make excuses for my RE appointments (25 minutes away), and before we did our first IVF I ended up telling my coworkers (there are just 3 girls in my group and I knew I'd end up needing them to cover my workload a bit)

My parents were next to know...after the 4th (and LAST) IUI failed. They have been VERY supportive (financially as well)....and after our IVF failed, we told DH's parents in person...on vacation in Las Vegas! It has definitely improved my relationship with MIL 100%. She used to ask OVER and OVER when we were going to have children. When we told her of our struggles, she cried and hugged me SOOOOO tight.

We have told a small group of people about our struggles. Overall, we are being very selective with who we tell. Some days, I just don't want to talk about it and other days I do. Luckily, our inner-circle of friends/family knows and have been incredibly supportive. Our RE said that we should do whatever we feel most comfortable with. She told us that it's our story and nobody has a right to know unless we decide to include them. We've really taken that to heart, which has been helpful because when we get disappointing news, I don't want everyone to know. Those that I rely on for support know and with others, it's nice to have some normalcy.

My brother-in-law (DH's brother)is an Ob/Gyn and both he and his wife like to pry a lot. We rarely talk with them and when we do, they start asking a lot of (what I consider to be) very inappropriate questions. At this point, they have no idea what is going on and we prefer to keep it that way. We haven't told any of DH's family because we aren't close with them and don't want it getting back to his DB & wife. That would just add a whole level of stress that we would like to avoid.

I totally don't blame you for not telling your BIL!

 

[esbrick]

Most of my friends know, but found out through quiet conversations. As most everyone knows I believe that people learn not only from their own experiences but through others as well. You never know when what you say may allow a light to go off in someone elses mind to beg the same question from their dr or insurance agency.

As for this part of our journey the circle has gotten smaller. We have desided to hold this information close right now since sometime igorance breeds fear. I'm also nervous about one set of my SIL & BIL knowing. They had a very rough summer with their relationship and things got ugly. I can honestly say that I saw a side of my BIL I don't ever want to deal with again. I believe if he had this information he could be cruel. My SIL is a nice woman but has her own issues, that's a whole nother thread! My other SIL knows but she is a secret keeper and I trust her implicetly.

Hope everyone is well!
xo
E

 

[si-am]

I'm "out" with it for the most part. All of my close friends know, and my family knows, and I made DH tell his family (the last thing I wanted was for my MIL to start bugging me about kids!)

I told JUST enough co-workers so that I think word has gotten around, because no one has asked me about having kids for at least 6 months.

It's not that I just go around telling everyone my business, but if people ask why I don't want children or when I'm going to have one, etc., I'm just honest about it.

I keep telling my husband that instead of all the TV shows glorifying people with kids (Kate + 8, Duggars, Teen Mom, whatever), there should be a reality show about infertility. I guess it wouldn't be as interesting but I really do think a lot of people are really ignorant about it.

 

[villain luvr]

I'm "out" with it for the most part. All of my close friends know, and my family knows, and I made DH tell his family (the last thing I wanted was for my MIL to start bugging me about kids!)

I told JUST enough co-workers so that I think word has gotten around, because no one has asked me about having kids for at least 6 months.

It's not that I just go around telling everyone my business, but if people ask why I don't want children or when I'm going to have one, etc., I'm just honest about it.

I keep telling my husband that instead of all the TV shows glorifying people with kids (Kate + 8, Duggars, Teen Mom, whatever), there should be a reality show about infertility. I guess it wouldn't be as interesting but I really do think a lot of people are really ignorant about it.

Gulianna and Bill have infertility in there show. It is not as informational but it is enough. They have done an IUI cycle, IVF cycle which ended with a m/c. She just did a second cycle and had OHSS. I stopped watching so I am not sure where they are with it. I know she had them frozen because she was not ready for the transfer because of the OHSS.

I wish there were more stories like that. But I wish they would have more information as well.