Troll's Trip Report

[DisCamper]

So is this the famous water tower from the famous and ill-fated FW Railroad?
Was it once a functioning railroad water tower that was moved to RC and then moved to the swimming pool?
The original FW Railroad all looked...well...to scale, for lack of a better term.

The answer is Yes both questions

 

[itch1]

Who knew a Troll had it in him ,funny, entertaining, great perspective !
Keep up the good work !
itch

 

[takeme2epcot]

Time for a quick update!

First, comments:

Who knew a Troll had it in him ,funny, entertaining, great perspective !

Thank you, thank you. Trollkind has been much maligned over the years.

Loving your report so far and your photos. You have taken some really unique pictures, love that!! Can't wait to hear more.

You've come to the right place. Plenty more to come.

Hey, Mr. Troll, ok, nice pics of the Fort, yada, yada, yada, been there, seen that, a zillion times. Although I can't get enough of hose and pollen on tree pics, where are the ones of you guys and Zoe enjoying the Fort.

Sorry, Mr. Bus Man, but this is the Troll Bus, not the Magic Bus, and you ain't driving. Please sit down in your assigned seat and just enjoy the ride.

If you don't enjoy the ride, your price of admission will be refunded in full!

OK, so back to the action.

When we left off, Mrs. Troll, Zoe, and I were setting off to do some looping.

We're looping newbs.

So we hopped in the cart:

And off we went.

Here are some of the sights:

Here's a cool little camper:

Notice the mag tires its owner put on it. You can take it muddin'.

This guy wants TV so bad, he's got his satellite dish right at the edge of the road:

Anything for a signal! Hope one of the cart thieves doesn't decide they need a new satellite dish.

Now I know a lot of folks take the Fort fairly seriously, but this guy's out of control:

Just a top-of-the-line golf cart, you say? Look closer:

While looping, we came upon a historic spot. Historic for me, anyway. As I said earlier, Pop always requested Wagon Wheel Way, but that doesn't mean we always got it. One year, when I was about 12, my sister Lori, who was 19 at the time, asked my father if her boyfriend Manny who would become her husband could come along for the vacation.

Pop said, "Absolutely out of the question."

So Lori protested and said that if Manny couldn't go, she wouldn't go.

Pop said, "Fine. Stay home."

So that's when my brother Mike and I intervened by literally picketing my father. We made protest signs and picketed back and forth in front of the TV while he tried to watch the football game.

Finally, he relented.

The next day, Manny came over. Pop went to him and said, "Well, I guess you have to come on my family vacation. Otherwise my damned kids won't go. Thanks a lot, pal."

So Manny came with us.

I can't remember the loop number, but it's the one that backs up to the canal.

And here's the historic spot:

What's so historic, you ask?

It's where Pop made Manny, his future son-in-law, erect his pup tent and sleep at night.

While the rest of us slept in the camper on the site, poor Manny slept way out here all alone...in the dark.

With the snakes.

And the brown recluses.

Talk about love.

Anyway, while admiring the historic spot, I noticed some bees harvesting pollen down by the canal:

OK, now if you haven't figured it out by now, I don't like holiday blowups.

Actually, let me correct that. One or two is OK, I guess -- if you must.

But 767 on one yard or camp site at Disney World is over the top.

That said, I must admit this is cool:

It's Santa in a travel trailer. That's not what I think is cool. What I think is cool is the fact that Santa opens the door and pops his head out, then pulls his head back in and closes the door behind him. I have to admit that's pretty damned good engineering to make a blowup open and close a door reliably over and over and over again.

Those Chinese blowup makers are awfully clever.

A bit later I was thrilled to find this:

It looks like a totally insignificant foot bridge to any normal person.

But to a troll overwhelmed by nostalgia, it's very meaningful.

At the age of 8, we came on a trip to the Fort. Every morning I'd ride my green Schwinn 5 speed bike to the Comfort Station to brush my teeth. I'd ride over this bridge to get there. I even scratched my initial on one of the timbers with a soda can poptop. I looked to see if I could find them.

No dice.

Oh well. But I found the bridge anyway.

Here's exactly what that Schwinn 5 speed looked like:

This may even be my bike! It got stolen when I was 12 while running into the Winn Dixie grocery store for a gallon of milk for my mother. I came out of the store with the milk to find that my Schwinn was long gone.

Those were the cart thieves and water-leaver-oners when they were young.

Well, that's all for now. Time to light the grill for some burgers!

Still to come: Zoe goes to the dog park, I make steaks for dinner, and this:

Step aside, Mr. TCD. I've scooped you on the River Country water wagon. I have an absolutely hilarious story to tell about it.

 

[starbuc71]

Way to go Mr. Troll. Awsome trip report. For someone who is or was considered a troll and heated up an argument over halloween decorations, I have to hand it you, you have won over many fiends including a lot of regulars. I have been here for almost a year and only got 40 something responses to my first trip report. Kudos to you to hit 85 responses. Looking forward to more

 

[stacktester]

I may have some troll blood in me lol. I'm very nostalgic about things too. So did Pop ever approve of Manny?

The camper you took a pic of actually comes with those wheels. It's made to carry your toys out in the woods and deserts. I would love to have one for my off road adventures.

Great report and looking forward to reading more.

 

[mgsmom]

Really enjoying your report! I like the pictures of all the little things we tend to buzz on by and not notice.
Got any more pics of the inside of that Aliner? Very curious.

OH, and PS - rescue dogs are the BEST!!!

 

[testtubes]

Loving the TR, pics, and nostalgia!

 

[clkelley]

Now I know a lot of folks take the Fort fairly seriously, but this guy's out of control:

Just a top-of-the-line golf cart, you say? Look closer:

Why is that out of control?? I've got Mickey ear graphics on my camper and a Musket Mickey graphic on my camper. Also have lots of Mickey Mouse and Fort Wilderness "stuff" (back when they sold it). Door mat, car tag, coffee mug, dishes, linens, tea pot, and drawer pulls on my camper.

 

[kampfirekim]

We have a Musket Mickey on our camper too Carol! ;-)

Out of control...maybe. But who cares? I love Musket Mickey. One of the most nostalgic things about FW.

 

[DisCamper]

I also have a Musket Mickey on our camper too Carol

 

[caveat lector]

I'll tell you why -- because chuckleheads somehow think it's funny to turn the water on and then run away, leaving the water running.

What masterminds.

These are probably the same featherbrains who steal rented golf carts.

One of my favorite lines, from one of my favorite actiors, in one of my favorite movies, "The world needs ditchdiggers too." Let's hope the geniuses you reference above end up in some meaningless mind numbing job for the rest of their lives.

I like when someone picks a topic and goes "wide and deep" on the pictorial investigation. Case in point: the mysterious black hoses. Your level of scrutiny is almost on parity with TCD! I find it very interesting.

 

[Lil' Lisa]

Why is that out of control?? I've got Mickey ear graphics on my camper and a Musket Mickey graphic on my camper. Also have lots of Mickey Mouse and Fort Wilderness "stuff" (back when they sold it). Door mat, car tag, coffee mug, dishes, linens, tea pot, and drawer pulls on my camper.

We have a Musket Mickey on our camper too Carol! ;-)

Out of control...maybe. But who cares? I love Musket Mickey. One of the most nostalgic things about FW.

I also have a Musket Mickey on our camper too Carol

We don't have one yet, but it is on order!

 

[takeme2epcot]

It's brunchtime here at the fort. We're sitting back under the shade of our hillbilly Walmart tarp, sipping Starbucks Sumatra coffee.

Time for another installment!

First, lots of comments to respond to.

For someone who is or was considered a troll and heated up an argument over halloween decorations, I have to hand it you, you have won over many fiends including a lot of regulars.

Thanks...it's always great to win over a few new friends, especially ones with interests similar to yours.

So did Pop ever approve of Manny?

Yes! Pop was a WWII vet and was a big pro-military guy. Manny went on to marry my sister Lori and enlisted in the Air Force. Once he did that, he won Pop's heart. Manny went on to earn a Masters in Mechanical Engineering while in the USAF. They've been married now for 27 years and have three kids.

Got any more pics of the inside of that Aliner? Very curious.

Some pics are on the way.

Why is that out of control?? I've got Mickey ear graphics on my camper and a Musket Mickey graphic on my camper. Also have lots of Mickey Mouse and Fort Wilderness "stuff" (back when they sold it). Door mat, car tag, coffee mug, dishes, linens, tea pot, and drawer pulls on my camper.

Ah, well, that would qualify you as being out of control, too! Not that that's a bad thing -- I love people who are passionate about their interests and loves.

Out of control...maybe. But who cares? I love Musket Mickey. One of the most nostalgic things about FW.

Agreed! Musket Mickey ruled. Banjo Mickey sucks:

Kind of sad that our society has become so sensitive that a cartoon character holding a cartoon musket may actually offend someone.

One of my favorite lines, from one of my favorite actiors, in one of my favorite movies, "The world needs ditchdiggers too." Let's hope the geniuses you reference above end up in some meaningless mind numbing job for the rest of their lives.

It's just so unfortunate that they do the damage that they do on their way to becoming ditch diggers. You can't have anything nice anymore because the Kenny Cart thieves come along and mess it up.

I like when someone picks a topic and goes "wide and deep" on the pictorial investigation. Case in point: the mysterious black hoses. Your level of scrutiny is almost on parity with TCD! I find it very interesting.

Well, now, in all seriousness, Mr. TCD is the master. I can't hold a candle to him. He's very talented and creative. You mentioning me in the same sentence as him is a great compliment.

Now, on with the show!

So we left off with Leslie, Zoe, and me going looping for our first time.

We saw some great stuff. But then the sun started to hang low and the shadows started to grow very long, so we headed back to camp to fire up the grill.

We had some ribeyes to char:

Luckily Leslie bought me a new grill brush:

Let me tell you, those steaks were downright delicious. There's just something about meat cooked over charcoal. Gas grills are good, but they're just not the same as charcoal.

After dinner we showered and prepared to turn in. We wanted to recharge for the next day at the Fort. Somehow, like a dummy, I forgot my razor and soap at the Comfort Station in the shower stall. I was so busy fumbling and trying to get dry and my stuff straight that I left them in there.

Darn it.

The next day we got up and decided to take Zoe to the dog park.

I brought my fishing pole along. And some special bait Pop taught me about. More on that in just a bit.

First the dog park:

Zoe was happy to be on the loose:

But Zoe has her priorities. Here's a list of her favorite activities:

- Eating
- Playing chase
- Sniffing
- Playing fetch

And it's specifically in that order.

So the problem with a dog park is, there's just so much to sniff. If you try to play fetch with her, you throw the ball, she runs to it, but then she catches a whiff of some new scent in the air and makes a sudden beeline away from the ball and toward the mysterious scent.

But now add another dog who's interested in the ball to the mix, and now it's a game of chase. Playing chase takes precendence over sniffing. She grabs the ball and entices the other dogs to chase her:

The dog park was fun for Zoe:

While she sniffed and tried to coax the other dogs to play chase, I took a look around.

Now if you haven't gathered it by now, I'm big on themes and theming. That's what I've always loved about the Fort and Disney World in general -- the theming. Ordinarily they're very true to their themes. Everything has to be in place and fit.

But the dog park fence doesn't seem to match the theming to me:

It's just too plain, too modern, and too, well, functional.

Doesn't match the theme.

Couldn't they make it match the other Fort fencing? I mean, I realize they have to mesh it in to keep the smaller dogs from getting out, but couldn't it have been a bit more...magical?

No matter.

While looking around, I noticed this turtle sunning himself by the water behind the dog park:

And I noticed this fencing and wondered how old it is:

So I decided to go take a closer look:

And this piece of fencing has fallen:

Isn't entropy an amazing thing? It makes you wonder what made the fence fall? Just to think, many years ago, a couple guys dutifully installed this fence and then walked away, a job well done. The fence then sat there in that state for many years in the rain, heat, humidity, and animals running up against it...until entropy finally caused it to break apart and fall to the ground.

Nothing we make is permanent.

Anyway, while I was waxing philosophical, Zoe blissfully started showing off her stuff. Here she is rolling over:

And sitting up:

And giving mama kisses:

So I spotted the dog walking path that wraps around the water from the dog park along the canal. So I suggested we take Zoe for a walk.

Now I know a little about growing grass and Florida and that little is this -- it's hard to keep it alive. If you develop a stuck spot in your sprinklers and your grass doesn't get water for, oh, more than 4 or 5 days straight, boom, you've got a dead patch.

I've spent a large percentage of my life keeping grass alive and green.

But here at Disney, grass just seems to grow on its own.

These are Florida Cypress trees with moss growing on them:

According to Pop, before the building boom in Florida at the turn of the century, Florida has jam packed with Big Cypress trees. Notice I capitalized the B and the C. That's because these trees were the stuff of legend.

These trees stood enormously high and had massive girth the rivaled the legendary Redwoods of California.

Their wood makes excellent building material. And at the turn of the century, we humans didn't take long to figure that out.

And cut them all down.

So all that's left now are these "little" guys.

That someday will become Big Cypress again...in hundreds of years.

And then we'll come and cut them all down again.

These drainage pipes have seen better days:

But somehow they very nicely fit in to FW's rustic theming.

Unlike the dog park fence.

Here is more Cypress, looking up:

One of the biggest mistakes amateur photographers make is trying to fit into the camera everything that their naked eyes see.

It always fails.

Cameras are good, but they'll never match the awesome powers of the human eye.

Like I said earlier, the dog trail jogs along the canal. That's where I saw these guys:

And the trail wraps into this loop:

The campers in that loop are lucky. They have their own canal.

And dog trail.

While strolling, I noticed this along the opposite bank:

What the heck is that?

It's odd sometimes how Disney is up to such a high standard but then weirdness like this slips through the cracks.

After our walk down the dog trail, we headed back to the dog park, where I decided I wanted to try my hand at fishing:

 

[takeme2epcot]

Hope I don't get in trouble for double posting, but I ran past my 29 picture limit in the previous post!

I used Pop's secret bait:

And here it is deployed on a hook:

Yes, folks, it's bacon.

Raw bacon.

And unfortunately the only thing it attracted was Zoe.

Anyway, while fishing we noticed this lonely pole:

I put it to good use:

Well, that's it for now. Much more to come!

Up next: Leslie and I hit the Settlement area for una ice cold cerveza and some exploration.

 

[stacktester]

TNBOB claims chicken skin from the fried chicked at Trails End is the new secret weapon.

 

[Lil' Lisa]

While looking around, I noticed this turtle sunning himself by the water behind the dog park:

Must be an invisible turtle...

And the trail wraps into this loop:

The campers in that loop are lucky. They have their own canal.

And dog trail.

We were in site 328 in September. Those are most definitely awesome sites.

While strolling, I noticed this along the opposite bank:

What the heck is that?

I'm not sure what they are called, but they are generally used during construction or grading to keep dirt and debris from getting into the water. It has been there across the canal at least since September.

 

[bigdisneydaddy]

1

 

[takeme2epcot]

Howdy folks, from camp troll!

It rained last night, just enough to get everything wet. But the sun has come up and I've placed everything out in the open to dry out. Should take no time at all.

From Dis Board Regular Lil Lisa:

Must be an invisible turtle...

Good catch! I must've goofed when I copied the image URL. Here's the visible turtle:

He just wouldn't cooperate and look at the camera for me.

And from Big Disney Daddy:

They look like floating booms, used to skim the water for contaminants. Most likely left over from some construction.

Agreed. But Disney is supposed to keep this behind the curtain!

Anyway, when we left off with Leslie and me going to hit the Settlement Area.

Zoe was zonked from all the fun and activity at the dog park, so she curled up on my bed in the Aliner for a siesta. The Maytag AC in the little Aliner makes it super chilly in there, so I bundled her up in a blanket.

We then hopped in the cart and rode on over to the Settlement Area.

One of my favorite places on earth.

So many memories.

Our plan was to hit Crockett's Tavern for a beer on the rocking chairs:

But when we arrived, it was only 2PM and Crockett's doesn't open until 4PM.

So we walked across the way to the Settlement Trading Post:

While inside the trading post, I noticed a nifty little detail up in the static display of country Donald:

Check it out:

It's P&G Laundry Detergent! You know what the P and the G stand for? Proctor and Gamble, the powerhouse Fortune 500 multinational corporation that makes such fine products as Tide, Pampers, and Head & Shoulders shampoo! It's the same company that was the subject of a bizarre urban legend propagated by Amway hucksters that claimed it was somehow linked to the Church of Satan.

Remember my brother-in-law Manny who had to sleep in a one man pup tent with the snakes and the spiders? He worked for 20 years for P&G. And my 23 year old nephew Matt now works for P&G.

I wonder if Disney realizes they're subliminally advertising for another mega corporation?

Anyway, back to the Trading Post and the beer.

We went to the cooler and found that Settlement Trading Post's beer selection is downright poor -- Bud, Bud Light, Coors Light, and Corona.

I grabbed a Corona; Leslie grabbed a Coors Light.

Corona is a far cry from my beloved Sam Adams Cream Stout.

But it's beer.

So we walked back over and found a spot on the porch with two available rocking chairs, which is a bit of a feat, as there are only 7 (count 'em) rocking chairs up there now. Back in the glory days, there were at least 20, and they faced both directions -- toward the Settlment Trading Post and toward Bay Lake. Now the lonely seven face the trading post, and the porch that faces Bay Lake is inhabited by picnic tables.

How dumb is that? I mean, the big attraction to that porch is the rocking chairs!

Oh well. At least we got a couple. And I got this picture:

Now you gotta admit -- this shot's unique! It's not like all the other "from the porch" shots!

Leslie enjoyed her Coors Light:

And I couldn't sit still.

My camera was burning in my hands and the neurons in my brain were firing rapidly, dredging up old memories that I had long stored away.

I came to this very spot on the porch and remembered a lesson I learned at the tender age of 8:

Toward the end of one of our many vacations to the Fort, Pop was sitting in a rocking chair, sipping a Bloody Mary, when he whipped out a $20 bill (which was worth a lot more back then) and said to my brother Mike, "Michael, take Norman over to the trading post. Both of you are allowed to buy one souvenir apiece with this."

So Mike and I excitedly ran over to the Trading Post.

Mike got one of those famous cap muskets that Disney sells both at the Fort and in the POTC gift shop.

I picked out a die cast metal airplane.

It was a cool airplane. The propellars spun and the passenger door opened. I liked it. I was confident Pop would like it, too, because he was a huge aviation buff. He was a private pilot and spent a heck of a lot of his free time stunt piloting.

So we went back to the porch, where Pop was still nursing his Bloody Mary.

"What did you get, Michael?" he asked, and Mike showed him the cap gun.

"How about you, Norm?" and I showed him the airplane.

Pop heaved a sigh of disapproval, and I was hurt.

"What?" I asked.

And he said, "Norman, there's nothing 'Disney' about that airplane. It doesn't even have a Mickey logo on the box. It's the same airplane you could have gotten at K-Mart for a third the price. They just take the same junk they sell at other stores and jack up the price!"

Disappointed as I was, I realized how right he was. Mike got a cap gun that you could only get at Disney World.

I got a die cast metal airplane I could have gotten at Walgreens.

That was a defining moment in my life. Ever since that day I've had a very keen awareness of marketing, product placement, and the simple parlor tricks so many vendors try to pull to separate you from your hard earned dollar.

I had been chagrined.

But kids are resilient -- or at least they were when I was one. Not five minutes later I had that airplane out of the box and was playing with it right there on that very spot on the porch.

But you know what?

Clearly Disney has replaced the boards of that porch deck many times over the years. You can tell in the picture they're somewhat new.

So yes, that is the same porch that I sat and played with my airplane on 33 years ago.

And at the same time, no that is not the same porch I sat and played with my airplane on 33 years ago.

Up next: My hilarious encounter with the River Country water wagon and another Pop porch story.

 

[clkelley]

Leslie enjoyed her Coors Light:

Looks like a nice afternoon. However, I have one comment about that picture. WAR EAGLE!!!!!!

 

[FWRR3]

Great report, great photos, great stories!