Trip after a death in the family?

[Markie Mouse]

Well I was planning on going in sept. with my brother but my aunt, who I was very close with and was a very important person in this family, unexpectedly passed away after serious brain surgery. I now want to take my cousin(my aunts daughter) instead to get her away from things. I was thinking mid oct. so she doesn't miss any school. My real question is, has anyone done a trip so soon after a huge death in the family? Will it be emotional? Can we still have fun? When is too soon? Thanks for any help!

 

[Disbabe]

Very sorry to hear about your loss

I lost my mum January 2010 and had a vacation to WDW planned for the July with my sister and her family. We expected it to be hard, but actually wasn't as bad as we thought. Mum was very much in our thoughts, but we were able to enjoy everything and actually helped me at that time. I think if I hadn't gone at that time I'd have suffered with my depression much sooner. As it happened I needed that 3 week break from work as that was ultimately what lead to my breakdown (certainly not the vacation).

You shouldn't feel guilty about going and I'm certain your aunt would be encouraging you to go and is lovely that you are conciderate of your cousin, which is admirable.

Go and enjoy yourself and perhaps raise a toast to her memory, like we did.

My prayers are with you and your family

 

[dizzymomx4]

I am sorry to hear of you loss.

In 2005 my Dad had planned a trip to Disneyland for our entire family, my brother and his family, my parents and my family. We were to go in July, to celebrate the 50th anniversary of DL and celebrate his end of chemo treatment . In May he passed away from lung cancer. We all still went on the trip, it was something that we felt my Dad had wanted to do with everyone. While we were there we celebrated the memories that we had made over the years with him. We thought about him the entire trip and rode "Its a Small World" in his memory, that was his favorite.
It was the best trip that our family took. I think that we needed that time to be together.

I think that it is wonderful that you want to include your cousin, it is something that your Aunt would smile about!

Prayers and Hugs sent your way~

 

[Markie Mouse]

Very sorry to hear about your loss

I lost my mum January 2010 and had a vacation to WDW planned for the July with my sister and her family. We expected it to be hard, but actually wasn't as bad as we thought. Mum was very much in our thoughts, but we were able to enjoy everything and actually helped me at that time. I think if I hadn't gone at that time I'd have suffered with my depression much sooner. As it happened I needed that 3 week break from work as that was ultimately what lead to my breakdown (certainly not the vacation).

You shouldn't feel guilty about going and I'm certain your aunt would be encouraging you to go and is lovely that you are conciderate of your cousin, which is admirable.

Go and enjoy yourself and perhaps raise a toast to her memory, like we did.

My prayers are with you and your family

Wow, thank you. I feel the same right now being at home right now(my office). I breakdown every once and awhile and the depression kicks my butt. Yours words are very reassuring for me though as I was feeling a little guilty. How could I possibly think about going on vacation at a time like this? But maybe a getaway would be good to help us heal. My aunt loved Disneyland too, my cousin was saying it was one of her favorite last memories since they just went last year. It would be cool If I could get more of my family on board but its really rough right now. Thank you so much.

 

[Scribble Kitty]

I had planned and paid for our December trip and we were down to less then a week when we got the horrible new that my boyfriend's grandma had suffered a stroke. We drove down to the LA area for the funeral and were seriously condsidering cancelling or delaying our trip. We tried not to tell to many people of our original plans, but the ones who did know were all very insistant that we go. She was a very selfless woman, and the thought that we would cancel our trip is not something she would have wanted. Her grandchildren being happy is all she ever wanted, so we went and were still able to have a good time.

Im sorry for your loss and hope you all can heal as a family in Disneyland. It certianly helped us.

 

[Markie Mouse]

I am sorry to hear of you loss.

In 2005 my Dad had planned a trip to Disneyland for our entire family, my brother and his family, my parents and my family. We were to go in July, to celebrate the 50th anniversary of DL and celebrate his end of chemo treatment . In May he passed away from lung cancer. We all still went on the trip, it was something that we felt my Dad had wanted to do with everyone. While we were there we celebrated the memories that we had made over the years with him. We thought about him the entire trip and rode "Its a Small World" in his memory, that was his favorite.
It was the best trip that our family took. I think that we needed that time to be together.

I think that it is wonderful that you want to include your cousin, it is something that your Aunt would smile about!

Prayers and Hugs sent your way~

Thank you. I never though about that way. I'm sure my aunt is very happy, her kids were here life. She was the family babysitter/caregiver and me being the first one she ever baby sat, I was her oldest "baby" as she would call us. She wanted nothing but happiness for us all so I'm sure she would be very happy about her oldest "baby" taking her baby girl to Disneyland. I couldn't imagine losing my mom, let alone at 16, so my heart is heavy for her. I said "hey we are going, why don't we bring Socorro with us. She needs a little bit of good right now" Thank You again.

 

[Markie Mouse]

I had planned and paid for our December trip and we were down to less then a week when we got the horrible new that my boyfriend's grandma had suffered a stroke. We drove down to the LA area for the funeral and were seriously condsidering cancelling or delaying our trip. We tried not to tell to many people of our original plans, but the ones who did know were all very insistant that we go. She was a very selfless woman, and the thought that we would cancel our trip is not something she would have wanted. Her grandchildren being happy is all she ever wanted, so we went and were still able to have a good time.

Im sorry for your loss and hope you all can heal as a family in Disneyland. It certianly helped us.

Thank you

 

[Minnie Loves Mickey]

My Aunt died unexpectedly a few days before my husband and I were taking our 3 young daughters to DL. We wanted to postpone our trip and everyone kept telling us not to she would want us to go. I took my three daughters and drove to her viewing the night before we were to leave and saw all the family and we were still up in the air as to cancel or not. I spent several hours with all the family and late that evening we all went to a restaurant and sat around talking about my Aunt. Spending this time with the family made it much easier for me to go. I had a hard time on the long drive down to DL but I made it through. Just knowing she is in a much better place helped.

 

[DaddyLove4eva]

My dad passed away unexpectedly as well. He just went to bed and didn't wake up. I was 13 when this happened. I am now 14. about 2 months after he passed we went to disney but we felt like he was missing. Then he payed us a visit and it made the whole trip better. What I am saying is your aunt will be with you always and I am sure she would love for you to take this trip ( I know my dad was) and we are planning another trip for a week from now! Have fun and she will help you through the sad times. Just keep your head held high!

 

[Dizneydaz]

My mom's sister passed away about 1-2 weeks before our trip 2 years ago. My mom was very close to her (older) sister and saw her about every other day. She was actually pretty healthy (except for kidney dialysis) until she broke a bone in her leg which was undiagnosed for a few weeks. She went downhill rapidly after that. We had a family get-together/memorial at our house before our trip. I wasn't sure if my DM would still want to go but she knew staying home wouldn't bring her sister back. In fact, going to WDW helped her by enjoying herself and watching her DD9 enjoying herself as well.

I don't believe my DM regrets her decision.

Now when the time happens and my DM is no longer with us I don't know how it will be for me. My DM is a very young 71 and she has been on every trip to WDW listed below with the exception of my very first trip in the 80's. On one hand I will relive the memories of all of our trips together but on the other hand I would be missing her. Hopefully this won't happen until I'm in my 70's or 80's.

DaddyLove4eva-I am so sorry for your loss. But you are right, your dad is with you on every trip.

 

[A Small World]

My dad passed away unexpectedly as well. He just went to bed and didn't wake up. I was 13 when this happened. I am now 14. about 2 months after he passed we went to disney but we felt like he was missing. Then he payed us a visit and it made the whole trip better. What I am saying is your aunt will be with you always and I am sure she would love for you to take this trip ( I know my dad was) and we are planning another trip for a week from now! Have fun and she will help you through the sad times. Just keep your head held high!

 

[azdisneylover]

Well I was planning on going in sept. with my brother but my aunt, who I was very close with and was a very important person in this family, unexpectedly passed away after serious brain surgery. I now want to take my cousin(my aunts daughter) instead to get her away from things. I was thinking mid oct. so she doesn't miss any school. My real question is, has anyone done a trip so soon after a huge death in the family? Will it be emotional? Can we still have fun? When is too soon? Thanks for any help!

(((Big hugs to you and your family)))
Sorry for your loss. Losing loved ones is never easy. Only you can decide when it is right to go to DL. You feel it in your heart/gut. July, 2009, my mom died; we went to DL for my birthday in November because that was the ONLY place I knew I could be and only cry a little bit; The Happiest Place On Earth. That was my first birthday that my mom didn't wish me a Happy Birthday and I felt so alone. I cried in the line of Mr Toad's Wild Ride. DH felt bad because he knew he couldn't take that pain away.
I say, do what you feel is right and is best for you and your cousin. Bring tissues because there will be a few tears.
(((Big hugs)))

 

[DaddyLove4eva]

Thank you very much I appreciate it!

 

[kev97rach]

I know exactly how all you guys feel....my mom just passed away in May of this year after her 2 year battle with cancer, she was only 58. We already had our first DL trip paid and planned since January for this July.....We leave in 15 days! Before my mom got sick, she came to WDW with us 3 times and she loved every minute of it!!! I know she would not want us to cancel this trip. I know I will shed some tears wishing she could have experienced DL with us because if she was still here and healthy, she definitely would have come with us.....but, like my pastor told us at her funeral....she is in a much better place, even better than Disney World!!

Hugs and prayers to you and your family!

 

[CarrieQuiteContrary]

Very sorry for your loss. I hope your family is coping well.

In December, my father, sister and I took our first Christmas-time trip to Disneyland. The day we got there, we went out to the parks and had a blast! My dad was tired and decided to go back to the hotel. When my sister and I went back to meet him for dinner, he was sitting on the bed crying and when we asked what happened, we found out that my grandmother had passed away that morning. As cheesy as it sounds, my dad said that being in Disneyland and having that escape really helped him to take his mind off everything.

 

[miry]

my grandfather passed away very recently.much to my sister's dismay I did not cancel the upcoming trip that my son and I have planned. I've felt bad that we are planning a trip so soon and that we are acting like life goes on so soon after. Growing up I spent as much time with my grandparents as my parents. As an adult I've lived about 200 yards from them for the past 14 years. I was definitely letting my guilt get the better of me to the point that I was almost dreading the trip. But a very wise and wonderful friend reminded me of how much my son and I love Disney and helped me remember that Disney is my happy place, it's a total escape from reality, and bad things just don't seem to happen there. Now I'm looking forward to our trip and making great and wonderful memories because those joys get us through the hardest times in life. I hope that you decide to go and are able to take your cousin with you. I think it will help and make some much needed magic for your family.

 

[PirateFish989]

Several years ago, there was a little girl in my mom's preschool class whose father died unexpectedly in a plane crash. It was devastating. The grandmother, who has been a really good family friend for years, decided that instead of that year being the year everyone remembers as "the year Dad died" it was going to be the year everyone would remember as "the year we all went to Disneyland.". Of course the goal was not to forget about their dad dying, but rather to remember the happy times they had with their dad and to celebrate his life surrounded by the entire family.

 

[blyday]

First off I want to say that I'm very sorry to hear of your loss. My dad died on June 1st after being caught in a ripe tide so I can totally relate to what you are going through right now.

In Oct of '08, one of my brother-in-laws suddenly passed away after a blood clot went into his lungs. The last vacation they went on as a family was to WDW with DH and I just 15 months earlier. We had a WDW trip planned with another of DH's sisters and her family in early December and we all felt guilty about going but knew that Kelly would be really upset with us if we canceled. I was so worried that it would be too hard but actually.....we had a wonderful time and DH and I would share stories with everyone of fun times that we'd had with Kelly and it really helped each of us heal.

Just before my father died, we actually had just got home from a WDW trip with the sister-in-law whose husband had passed away and again.....I really worried about it being painful but instead, it was just really magical and amazing. I really liked seeing how happy my little niece (now 14....11 when her dad died) is and that she is doing okay.

Now, we are planning our DLR trip and I felt the usual, "should we really go so soon after Dad's death" and the answer is "yes". Disney is a wonderful place to be. It makes me happy. We always go with extended family and it helps to be with family and to create those special bonds with them. So, we are planning this trip and I know that there will be times when we will stop and think of Dad as well as Kelly, and we will smile because we will know that they are smiling down on us.

Go, have a wonderful time, don't be afraid of the sad moments (and there very well could be a few times when you just need to stop and feel sad) they will actually help you both heal and will just bring you closer together.

 

[Markie Mouse]

Thank you to every one that replied. Your words were very comforting in that I was not the only one who had gone through this. I am now looking forward to going and eating her favorite foods and riding her favorite rides at Disneyland.

 

[DaddyLove4eva]

So does anyone recommend any specific places to eat in downtown disney or any hotels?????