Trans and cruising with Disney?

[cinnabunjay]

Since moving about a thousand miles away from my pretty strict family, I've been presenting masculine much more, being much more comfortable in my being transmasc nonbinary. In the state of Maine, I can even get a marker on my license that states I'm nonbinary, and early next year they're expecting to fully roll out markers for nonbinary individuals on official US passports, which is super exciting for me; totally gonna get a new passport before I go on my very first cruise (on the Wish!!) next fall, for the Very Merrytime 11/14-18 trip.

But while that's all well and good, the closer we get, the more nervous I am. Has anyone had any issues with Cruising Disney While Trans? Any recommendations on if I should get a pronoun button for my lanyard, or anything like that? Will I be able to request the use of my name and not the deadname still on my ID? Have you encountered anyone being particularly rude?

It's all a bit scary since I lived very sheltered and hidden for a very long time, and it's only now at almost 40 that I'm able to actually be me, but even loving Disney as much as I do, I suppose I'm still scared. Thoughts??

 

[Kitty-chan]

It's all a bit scary since I lived very sheltered and hidden for a very long time, and it's only now at almost 40 that I'm able to actually be me, but even loving Disney as much as I do, I suppose I'm still scared. Thoughts??

Congratulations on finding the courage to actually be YOU! I'm the (cisgender, queer) mom of a transgender woman, and I think you're fabulous for reaching out with these questions!

I think your DCL "key to the world" ID card probably has to have the same name as your official documentation, especially since they'll be checking it against your passport when you board, and if you disembark at any of the ports of call. So, if your new name is on your passport in advance of the cruise, you'll absolutely want to get it updated on your DCL reservation. If you use they/them pronouns, a pin with those pronouns is probably a good idea, since the singular they is still unfamiliar to some folks.

If for any reason you don't have a new passport before the cruise, you could consider getting a personalized lanyard with your name embroidered on it, plus perhaps your pronouns. You'd still need to use the DCL card for purchases, room access, and such, but there's no reason to leave it visible in your lanyard (you could always put another card in your lanyard to cover the side with your name . . . just get something festive and Disney and you'll fit right in!

One really nice thing is that with rotational dining, you'll have the same Cast Member serving your table every night at dinner. And that CM will usually keep track of your favorite beverages, any dietary restrictions or allergies, etc. So, once you meet them on the first night and let them know your name and pronouns, I'll bet they'll be conscientious about that throughout the trip. (Also, if you're traveling with a group, be sure to have your travel agent get everybody in the same dining party to be seated together.)

I hope you have a wonderful cruise!

 

[cinnabunjay]

Congratulations on finding the courage to actually be YOU! I'm the (cisgender, queer) mom of a transgender woman, and I think you're fabulous for reaching out with these questions!

I think your DCL "key to the world" ID card probably has to have the same name as your official documentation, especially since they'll be checking it against your passport when you board, and if you disembark at any of the ports of call. So, if your new name is on your passport in advance of the cruise, you'll absolutely want to get it updated on your DCL reservation. If you use they/them pronouns, a pin with those pronouns is probably a good idea, since the singular they is still unfamiliar to some folks.

If for any reason you don't have a new passport before the cruise, you could consider getting a personalized lanyard with your name embroidered on it, plus perhaps your pronouns. You'd still need to use the DCL card for purchases, room access, and such, but there's no reason to leave it visible in your lanyard (you could always put another card in your lanyard to cover the side with your name . . . just get something festive and Disney and you'll fit right in!

One really nice thing is that with rotational dining, you'll have the same Cast Member serving your table every night at dinner. And that CM will usually keep track of your favorite beverages, any dietary restrictions or allergies, etc. So, once you meet them on the first night and let them know your name and pronouns, I'll bet they'll be conscientious about that throughout the trip. (Also, if you're traveling with a group, be sure to have your travel agent get everybody in the same dining party to be seated together.)

I hope you have a wonderful cruise!

Honestly, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much.

It's been a long, hard, pretty scary journey from the word go, and the closer we've gotten to our trip, the more anxious I've gotten. I don't know if I'm going to be able to get my legal name changed before the trip, so an embroidered lanyard sounds like a really cool idea! And it's good to know that you keep the same server through the whole cruise- that'll help out a lot when it comes to name and pronoun stuff. I've also considered, taking in your advice, getting a custom pin made to hang on my lanyard!

I'm really looking forward to it, and super excited. I'm sure it'll be a great time!

 

[RubyWish]

Posting to show my support and congratulate you on sharing your true self with the world, and going on a Disney cruise!

I can't provide any experience on DCL (I've only been once when I was 10), but I did want to share our recent experience on a Celebrity cruise. My spouse is cis-female, but dresses exclusively masculine. She was mis-gendered a few times by both crew and guests. They quickly apologized and corrected without asking any questions or being awkward, so that was nice. Also, we didn't get any comments, looks, or anything negative in regard to being a same-sex couple, and we are plenty affectionate in public. Last thing from the cruise that I was impressed with was that they debuted a new late-night show hosted by one of the cast singers in drag! Definitely unexpected, considering that Celebrity is more conservative than Disney and primarily older passengers. I know those experiences don't relate directly to yourself, but thought they might provide some comfort.

Only anecdote that relates more to yourself is that we got into a conversation with a bartender from Bali about names and pronouns, and I was surprised and glad that I didn't have to explain "they/them" pronouns to him. He already knew about them and explained how in Bali, non-binary people can just leave off the gendered prefix that's traditionally included as part of their name ("I" or "Ni").

 

[bsmcneil]

So - I haven't cruised but I do want to name that when I asked a similar question for my NB kiddo, Disney quickly responded that their name could be whatever we told them it would be (for our trip to WDW). I often use my first name for things (even as I go by my middle name) because I worry it needs to line up with my license, credit card, etc but they affirmed that wasn't a concern. So, hopefully they can affirm that for you, too!

 

[Mx.wheresperrytheplatypus]

not really that related, but when you book the reservation one of the prefixes you can select is mx.! i am nonbinary aswell and it makes me so happy!