totally OT-help with my gifted 11yr old dd/alternative schooling

[alohamom]

I know this is totally off topic but so many of you are great parents and have excellent parenting suggestions I thought I would throw this out there and see what everyone sends back! My beautiful daughter is 11 and has been identified gifted since grade 4. Her IQ is off the charts and her scores on all the testing were in the 99.9 to 100 percent range (96.0+ is "gifted"). At her choosing we tried her in a gifted class but there were alot of kids with behaviour issues and it was in a much larger school and so it didn't work for her. She gets along fairly well socially, doesn't really have 1 best friend but has many and is generally not a problem (unless she wants to debate something-yikes!) In the last little while she has been complaining to me how boring school is, the teacher kinda uses her as a classroom helper, etc. I dug a little deeper and she says the way school teaches you in just the same old stuff, but them each year they add on new stuff. She She says the review part of learning is what bores her and she loves to dig into stuff right away as she has an incredible memory. This morning she had a major meltdown, I wont go into the details but it was nasty. My first thought was a bully situation but she assures me it is not a social thing and I tend to believe her. I did some major reassuring but I was thinking more and more about some kind of alternative schooling for her. She loves art and cartooning and wants to be either a Disney Imagineer (thats my girl!) or a computer artist of some kind. We are in Halton and there are no arts schools like in Peel. I just want to make sure she doesn't slip thru the cracks and begin hating school. I was even thinking about some kind of extracurricular animation course but I just don't know what to do to prop her up. I take her out of school sometimes to supplement the general education she is getting-ie-we are going to the AGO on Monday but it isn't cutting it-What do I do!!!! Help if you can, any is appreciated and many thanks for reading my looong post!Much Aloha...

 

[mickeywho?]

Are you with the public board in Halton? We're with the Catholic board and this past year they are trying something new with the enrichment program. Parents/Students had a choice of full-time enrichment, support within their regular classroom or "part-time at the designated enrichment school". We chose the part-time class and my son loves it. They are in their regular class for most of the weeks of the school year but 1 week of every month they are bused to another school for the enrichment portion. Those weeks are themed ie, architecture, forensics, comic books, robotics etc. They have to catch up a bit when they get back in the regular class but that's not too bad. My son has already said he hopes they do this program again next year. Not bad for a kid that's been complaining about school for as long as I can remember.
Do you live close to Sheridan College? They have an amazing full-time animation program and the teachers there may be able to direct you to programs for school-aged kids...I'm not sure if Sheridan has any.
There use to be programs at a small art school in Mississauga - I did animation there growing up - but I think it's now owned by Erindale College and they are running different courses there now.
HTH! I know what it's like to have a frustrated kid!

 

[alohamom]

Oh Mickey who, I an so glad to know it is not just me!!! We are with the public board and they actually do offer 1 or 2 enrichment days a term and they have been great but we are finding it is just not enough! Funny you said Sheridan, I was thinking along those lines too. I was wondering what the age limits are, if any...It is hard because in she is intelectually mature but emotionally an 11 year old! Thanks for the ideas and support...

 

[mickeywho?]

Here's an art school to check out
http://www.oakvilleacademy.com
My youngest went there for preschool and we really liked the staff. They seem to have a couple of different courses in fine art for her age and a bit older.
Does your school have any clubs that she would be interested in? Ours has very little but I know the public school by us has quite a range of clubs ie - robotics that can really challenge these kids.

 

[damo]

My daughter went through the one day a week gifted program in the Halton Public System (a while ago). I didn't find that it was all that important. What I think is more important is what you do outside of school time. I also found that being in the French Immersion system, there was enough going on at school and it was my responsibility to build on her interests outside of school. We didn't go the art route but went the music and dance route. I don't think it matters which route you go but you need to get them very involved in another interest. She is now all grown up and it is her outside interests that she has pursued.

 

[alohamom]

Thanks for the art academy link! Damo, I agree with you and we do all that, piano, karate, girl guides, baseball in the summer and that is why I am concerned-she is beginning to see that the world has so much to offer and that regular school has parameters. Thanks for you input...

 

[damo]

Thanks for the art academy link! Damo, I agree with you and we do all that, piano, karate, girl guides, baseball in the summer and that is why I am concerned-she is beginning to see that the world has so much to offer and that regular school has parameters. Thanks for you input...

Unfortunately, life has parameters. Sometimes it is really important to know that the world (and school) is what you make of it. You can take every average thing that is thrown at you in regular school and turn it into something wonderful or you can sit back and just do the same stuff that everyone else is doing and claim how boring it is. There are lots of great life lessons to be learned in regular school. At least that is what I found with my family. I certainly can't say it will be the same for yours. I remember when my daughter was in Grade 4, she had a very average teacher who just did what she could to get through the day. That was probably the most important year for my daughter because she learned that she should not rely on others for her inspiration but she needed to be creative on her own and take her assignments and projects to a whole different level.

It is really tough on parents of kids at this age to know what is best for their kids. What I found out, now that my kids are grown up, is that the education in those years in middle school really wasn't what was important at all. That wasn't what shaped their futures and formed their goals and dreams. What shaped them was learning how to use whatever was given to them to their advantage and make the absolute best out of it and make people go "wow"!

It didn't see this at that time but when I look back at those days it all looks so very different than it did then.

 

[alohamom]

Thanks again-I do agree with you Damo and that is exactly how she plays it-She is in the school play, is on the Student council and on the basketball team. Last night she took the data from her math homework and formatted it into a bar graph and pie chart for fun! I guess I just wish the teacher promoted this within the actual class. It seems to me that dd has been designated class helper with kids less academic than her rather than being given the chance to explore the work on different levels. I like to think she is getting life skills out of it but now that she is expressing misery I am concerned. Having said all this, we hit the park on the walk home and she ran around like a banshee and now is in a great mood so...could it be hormones? Age 11!!!Yikes, if it is, what will age 14 be like?

 

[PrincessTrisha]

Have you talked to your school principal to see if there is a full time alternative school in your area.

Speaking as someone who went through the Toronto board gifted program (part time only was offered at my school), I have to say, it would be a shame to waste your daughters advanced mental skills on work that she either already knows or picks up substantially faster than anyone else.

In grade 8 I was borderline failing English and yet for highschool placement my IQ was tested (for a full time gifted program) and found that I was already reading at a University level. The reason I was doing poorly? My English teacher gave weekly assignments to go to the library and look up random (but specific) facts. Every week a new assignment. He would hand out the papers on Monday and every day at English class we were set loose on the library to look up and find the information. Sorry, but that's not English - I spent my time finding books I wanted to read instead. I didn't understand the purpose of the assignments and just plain didn't do them.

I can think of nothing worse than letting your daughter become frustrated and lose her desire to learn because she has to go through a system that doesn't meet her needs or even recognize them.

When you get out of school, you are only really held back by your desire and abilities - in school you are held back by a system that wants everyone to be average.

 

[dancin Disney style]

If you want more info on the above posted art academy you can PM me. I don't think it's what you would be looking for.

As far as school goes I can tell you that for myself (I also have a high IQ) school became way too easy, very fast and as a result I stopped doing the work. Funny, I also had an english teacher (grade 10) that would turn us lose to the library to do assigments. Which I loved because I would find other things to do that were far more stimulating.

Would a private school be out of the question?

 

[alohamom]

Princess Trisha-you are eloquent and concise with your words and captured exactly how I feel! Dancing Disney Style, we have thought about private schools from day one but there are not too many that I am happy with in our area (we are rural, north of Milton) I have a friend whose child goes everyday on the bus to a private school from Campbellville to Guelph and it is almost an hour one way after all the stops are made, so geography, cost and time are all prohibitive factors. I talked to the SERT this morning to see if he could shed any light on the matter, and to make him aware of her feelings and we had an interesting talk. He has offered to research some different things for us for outside of the school. As well, he informed me he will be taking a team to the Halton "Thinkbowl" (a problem solving competition) which she did last year and loved so that will give her something else to look forward to. Thanks for all of your input guys-I am sure we will muddle thru this...

 

[Sillyminny40]

What a well timed thread.
My ds12 is not doing any work at school. He is so bored. But very bright.
Went to see teacher two days ago and found out the mess my child is in (not regular parent-teacher interview day).
Binders sloppy, papers chucked in bottom of locker. Everything from last 8 weeks in one broken binder. Tests scores are low. Ah.
So I took his work home and did the math with him that he should be doing in a mere 3 hours (this is 7 weeks worth). There is no attention issue here or laziness. He has been telling me there is no homework.
The teacher acknowledges he is bright but cannot give him more advanced work if he is not completing the required day to day work.

So what do I do now? I phoned principal and now we are setting up a group meeting.

 

[tigercat]

My dgrdd was finally tested as gifted but it took a lot of work to get her tested. We homeschooled her until grade 4 and wish that we had kept it up. She spent the next several years being a teachers helper and part time secretary. No school work as she had already done it through our schooling. Bored to tears. My dd did not push things though as she thought that my dgrdd should realize that life is not fair. What a waste of a mind. She is now in grade 9. They tested her again in the english side and she is in university level. Now the teachers at hs are not letting her get away with things and they expect her work to be above average. If it isn't then her grade would drop. First semester her mark was 87% average and she decided she would try harder from now on because she knew she could do better. She is going to Queens for a week and is really looking forward to it.
tigercat

 

[Sillyminny40]

Going to Queen's for a week? Wonderful! How does that work?

 

[tigercat]

She was invited for a week's instruction at Queens. After her report came out in January there was the invitation. She will be going to Queens, staying in the dorms and will be taking 2 courses for a week. She is into Art so they are Visual Arts and Murial painting. There are other courses if you want to get into medicine, science or maths. I really hope that it encourages her to go forward and keep working hard. It's hard to see a good brain go to waste.
tigercat

 

[Sillyminny40]

Good to hear this is offered for your child.
So what is the chance of a 16 yr old with a 98% average (from Manitoba) doing something like that? We in the country don't find these programs easily! LOL!

 

[tigercat]

I wish I could say that you could do it too, but I didn't even know that this was available. I believe that others can do this week as well but is offered to the kids that they feel will be going on to University later on. I don't feel that there is enough for kids with a higher intelligence. There seems to be some for the other troubled kids but....
tigercat

 

[damo]

She was invited for a week's instruction at Queens. After her report came out in January there was the invitation. She will be going to Queens, staying in the dorms and will be taking 2 courses for a week. She is into Art so they are Visual Arts and Murial painting. There are other courses if you want to get into medicine, science or maths. I really hope that it encourages her to go forward and keep working hard. It's hard to see a good brain go to waste.
tigercat

My daughter did this as well. They had a blast!!!

 

[tigercat]

Damo you are the first I know who had someone who went. What was it like? You said they had fun? Did they learn a lot? Was it a good experience? Were they taken care of?
tigercat

 

[Saratoga Souris]

I was one of the "gifted" kids..... was already a year ahead and then the teacher wanted to put me ahead another year..... thank goodness..... my mother said "no"! She is a very practical woman.
When you get older, those years can become very "awkward". I managed well but it wasn't always easy. I am glad to hear that your child is not having any trouble being socially appropriate; that can be a challenge.

Funny..... I have never in my life, ever, been "bored".... I can find interest and excitement in the smallest of things...... you have to learn that to survive (among other things)

I would recommend looking for "extras" outside of school. I was super involved in sports but the "hook" can be anything (in your case Art). I would say that I kept myself busy...... still do (3-4 jobs and about 6 hrs sleep).

Good luck and have fun with everything!!