Tonight's "Trading Spouses"

[goofygirl]

Any thoughts about the Orthodox Jewish mom vs. the Bible Belt Christian mom?


One thing that struck me about the Jewish mom- at the end when she met the other mom, she said something like "Academics and achievement is important where we live, but not so important where you live." I thought that was out of line.

 

[disneysnowflake]

I watched the show.

I really didn't think the comment by the Boston Orthodox Jewish mom was that bad. I don't think she meant it to be hurtful.

I live in a rural area. My bil lives in a nice area outside Washington D.C.
The schooling is like night and day.

In my area only a certain percentage of kids go to college.
In my bil's area almost all the kids go to college. In fact, my bil's school has the kids taught 2 grade levels over what our students are. They have more money in their district.

My son in 11th grade is in the honors program. He has homework, but it's nowhere near my 11th grade nephew. My nephew is writing these long term papers, etc. My son has some reports, but nothing at all like my nephew. It's not even close.

I just think the Boston mom meant that kids are just expected to do well and go to college just like my bil's school district.

She wasn't putting down the other mom. I think it's just a fact of life.

If the Boston mom would have said that to me I wouldn't have been offended at all because that's the way it is here.

Maybe I'm wrong though. Perhaps the schools in Kentucky aren't like the ones in my area.

 

[Buckalew11]

Well, when I moved from NJ to TN in February of 1975, the school in NJ told me that I would just coast through the rest of that year. I'd be so far ahead it would all be very easy. Oh good!

Then, I walked in a very rural school in TN and guess what? They were ahead of where we were in NJ! No coasting. It was scary because the teacher had such a southern drawl that I thought I might fail because I had not idea what she was saying!!

So, that remark would have probably offended me if I were on the show. I don't agree that schools in the north are better than than schools in the south. I do believe scholls vary in how good they are from place to place though.

 

[JennyMominRI]

Well, when I moved from NJ to TN in February of 1975, the school in NJ told me that I would just coast through the rest of that year. I'd be so far ahead it would all be very easy. Oh good!

Then, I walked in a very rural school in TN and guess what? They were ahead of where we were in NJ! No coasting. It was scary because the teacher had such a southern drawl that I thought I might fail because I had not idea what she was saying!!

So, that remark would have probably offended me if I were on the show. I don't agree that schools in the north are better than than schools in the south. I do believe scholls vary in how good they are from place to place though.

I thought the Jewish Moms comment was aout of line also..I think she was nervous and it came out all wrong..Boy there were so many things in that show,that I don't even know what to comment on.

 

[JoyG]

Well it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be but there were a few irritating things....


The southern mother started out sounding like she was really ignorant. I kept thinking to myself, she's an RN, she can't possible be as ignorant as she's being portrayed here. I think by the end she was much better.

I didn't like the way the camera made it seem like there were really looonnnnggg gaping pauses in the conversation with the grandmother. I don't think the pauses were that pronounced. I wasn't there of course but good grief, people don't really act like that when they're having a conversation do they?

I think both families were surprisingly judgmental with each other. I can't imagine saying some of the things they say to a guest staying in my house. The southern family was acting like jewish people were akin to a carnival show, I can't imagine being that rude about someone. The jewish mom said some really rude things about their education; esp. in her meeting with the other mom.

I probably would have suggested a tutor for the teen as well, I think she had good intentions but it didn't come out right.

 

[JennyMominRI]

Well it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be but there were a few irritating things....


The southern mother started out sounding like she was really ignorant. I kept thinking to myself, she's an RN, she can't possible be as ignorant as she's being portrayed here. I think by the end she was much better.

I didn't like the way the camera made it seem like there were really looonnnnggg gaping pauses in the conversation with the grandmother. I don't think the pauses were that pronounced. I wasn't there of course but good grief, people don't really act like that when they're having a conversation do they?

I think both families were surprisingly judgmental with each other. I can't imagine saying some of the things they say to a guest staying in my house. The southern family was acting like jewish people were akin to a carnival show, I can't imagine being that rude about someone. The jewish mom said some really rude things about their education; esp. in her meeting with the other mom.

I probably would have suggested a tutor for the teen as well, I think she had good intentions but it didn't come out right.

I get the feeling there is a lot of creative editing in these shows...I don't think we *really* see what these families are like.

 

[Mermaid02]

I thought it interesting that the parents had a hard time dealing with the switch and the children (both families) seemed to really like the new "Mom" and be quite tolerant of the differences. Aaron got his feelings hurt when Lisa mentioned a tutor because it made him feel stupid but in the end they seemed to really connect. When Ashton was explaining not letting the serving utensils touch your plate to keep the meal Kosher I liked how she said, "So she can eat the food she made" appreciating the fact that Lisa made the meal for them. The Shatz (sp?) children really seemed to like Sharon too- saying it was a "sad surprise" that she was leaving. I think it was good for Sharon's extended family to spend some time with someone different than themselves- she even seemed to win over the Grandmother! I also think that Sharon is right and Lisa's husband needs to loosen up a bit- I think he can do that without sacrificing his beliefs. Arhey's new look was fantastic!

 

[goofygirl]

Yes I agree that her saying he needed a tutor wasn't the end of the world. I still think she looked down on the family though and she shouldn't have because though they don't have Ph.D's, they are smart too. The daughter was in college and doing very well, and the mom was an RN. You don't get to be an RN by being dumb.


I found it a little funny that the Southern mom was calling some of the Jewish things "Arabic." lol

 

[hentob]

Well, when I moved from NJ to TN in February of 1975, the school in NJ told me that I would just coast through the rest of that year. I'd be so far ahead it would all be very easy. Oh good!

Then, I walked in a very rural school in TN and guess what? They were ahead of where we were in NJ! No coasting. .

I think things are different now, though. I just saw somewhere (someone help!) that NJ has some of the best public schools in the nation. We are in PA, but my nephew goes to public school in NJ and WOW some of the stuff he is doing is insane. It seems like he is doing the work that I did as a college freshman.

I really wish I would have watched this particular swap. Is there going to be a replay so I can set my TIVO?

 

[cardaway]

Given what we saw in the first hour I was really surprised to see the reactions as the moms left for their real homes.

After her mistake in the way she approached it, Lisa really seemed to have to connected with Aaron. He looked like he would actually miss her when she was saying her goodbyes. I think he realized that she was right, he is holding himself back with his laziness towards education.

Sharon's openess seemed to really click with the kids, but they couldn't show it with the dad around. It was quite telling that she got some things from those kids that the parents never did. I think that family may be communicating more in the future, and that's a good thing.

The really shocking part is what little input the dads had, unless they didn't show us when they actually got involved.

 

[MzDiz]

I kept thinking "how do you not know what kosher is?" I'm white bread America and I have kosher foods in my house. How can you be a Christian and not know a few things about Judaism? I mean, it's in the Bible. In catechism we had a huge lesson about Passover and even sampled some foods, and this was in the Midwestern suburbs, not Boston. Mind boggling, I tell ya.

 

[cardaway]

I kept thinking "how do you not know what kosher is?" I'm white bread America and I have kosher foods in my house. How can you be a Christian and not know a few things about Judaism? I mean, it's in the Bible. In catechism we had a huge lesson about Passover and even sampled some foods, and this was in the Midwestern suburbs, not Boston. Mind boggling, I tell ya.

I think the answer to that was seen in the struggle for Lisa to find anything Kosher in the area. I thought it was cool that she didn't know about the mail order deal. Same kind of thing, she wouldn't know because she would never need it at home.

 

[MUFFYCAT]

I thought there were a few commets by the Boston mom that were
out of line and insulting to the family.

but with TV the editing sometimes makes it worse.

 

[Buckalew11]

I should have also added that I didn't get to watch the show!

Living where I do in the south, I can tell you that I do not know a single Jewish family around here. Knoxville has synagoges but no other towns around the area do that I know of. Poeple here are ignorant when it comes to Judiasm (as I am also, I know a bit from here and the Internet). There isn't much prejudice toward Jews here (I think there seems to more prejudice still with African-Americans and now Mexicans that others---how sad). But, I can tell you that where I lived in NJ the prejudice towards Jewish people was the worst prejudice I have ever experienced. This was my pesonal experience and may not have been the experience of others but it was heartbreaking, scary and sad to witness.

 

[froglady]

Any thoughts about the Orthodox Jewish mom vs. the Bible Belt Christian mom?


One thing that struck me about the Jewish mom- at the end when she met the other mom, she said something like "Academics and achievement is important where we live, but not so important where you live." I thought that was out of line.

Both of the Jewish parents are academics who probably have friends/neighbors who are also academics, or probably only socialize with people who have advanced degrees, so it IS of utmost importance in their world. I know this was true of DH; when he was growing up, everyone he knew was involved in medicine, law, engineering, or business. He really had limited contact with any "blue collar" workers until med school, when he met them as patients.

I think that the Jewish mom would be surprised to discover how many people in the Boston area are very similar to the Kentucky family.

BTW, SIL (Boston area) finally visited us for the first time, and had her "southern" stereotypes blown away when we took her on a tour of our neighborhood. Guess what? We all don't live in doublewides with a gun rack in our pickup truck...but most of those who do are good, decent, hardworking people who will treat you with respect and kindness, as soon as you stop looking down your nose at them. And they might teach you a thing or two about surviving in the real world.

 

[Buckalew11]

BTW, SIL (Boston area) finally visited us for the first time, and had her "southern" stereotypes blown away when we took her on a tour of our neighborhood. Guess what? We all don't live in doublewides with a gun rack in our pickup truck...but most of those who do are good, decent, hardworking people who will treat you with respect and kindness, as soon as you stop looking down your nose at them. And they might teach you a thing or two about surviving in the real world.

And we wear shoes!! And don't drink our moonshine out a jug!!

 

[JennyMominRI]

And we wear shoes!! And don't drink our moonshine out a jug!!

You do? Can I come visit you and we can go coon hunting?
I will say that I didn't care for Kentucky Moms comment about how she was going back to *real* people now.
I think both moms said some offensive things,but generally they were both nice.