Toddler tantrums

[vettechick99]

DD2.5 is sitting on the floor wailing because I wouldn't give her a blanket that she tried to snatch from me. So she's pitching a fit, crying when I look at her, and stopping occasionally to watch tv. Dr. Phil.

I can sit here all night. I mean DIS'ing while she's crying is not my idea of a perfect evening, but I'm not going to give into this tantrum just for peace and quiet. I told her that when she asked nicely she could have it. She'd rather sit there I guess.

So my question, is there anything you can do to truncate a tantrum without giving in? What do the experts say?

 

[lovetoscrap]

Since you are still in the same room with her she is still getting lots of attention. She knows that you are watching her and she it playing it for all that it is worth.

One of you needs to leave the room.


Either take her to her room and/or put her in her bed (as long as it is safe for her to be there unsupervised) and tell her calmly that she can come out when she is finished.

Or you need to go to another room (again, be sure you can peek in to be sure she is safe) and take away her audience. If she tries to follow you, just quietly pick her up and put her back in the original room and calmly tell her that you will be back when she is finished.

At this point this is not about the blanket, it is about the tantrum.

Easy to type, not always so easy to do!

 

[Wishing on a star]

Ohhhh, I so would not want to put up with tantrums!!!!

But, at 2.5, I am not sure a blanket, or a simple case of 'grabby fingers', is the hill to die on....
What blanket is it? Is it one she uses??? A special 'throw'???
I think diversion (distraction, redirection) is a good tactic.
Set what she can't have aside... Take it 'off the table' so to speak.

Now, other things that a toddler should simply not be having... Yep, wouldn't give in.

It can be funny at first watching the waterworks show!!!

 

[golfgal]

I think you are doing the right thing, ignore her. Even removing her from the room gives her attention. The pausing to watch Dr. Phil is a big tip off that she is trying to get your attention. My kids didn't through very many tantrums because I just ignored them OR I joined in and did the same thing they were doing and I would get "Mommy stopppp". That pretty much ended any tantrum.

I do find it very hard to believe that your beautiful little girl would be less then perfect--she is just so dang CUTE .

 

[DMickey28]

I leave the room or put my DS in time-out in his room. He doesn't have toys in there so it's not a fun place!!

We have this battle on a daily basis ... he wants cartoons on tv, he wants a cup of juice instead of sippy, he wants me to sit on the floor when I am paying bills, he wants ... he wants ... he wants ....

He will be 2.5 in late October.

 

[3boymthr]

I think you are doing the right thing, ignore her. Even removing her from the room gives her attention. The pausing to watch Dr. Phil is a big tip off that she is trying to get your attention. My kids didn't through very many tantrums because I just ignored them OR I joined in and did the same thing they were doing and I would get "Mommy stopppp". That pretty much ended any tantrum.

I do find it very hard to believe that your beautiful little girl would be less then perfect--she is just so dang CUTE .

Yup, having a tantrum of your own can be FUN! I used to do it with the kids when they were little and I still do it if I babysit. It's amazing the reactions you'll get. One little girl asked me "why are you crying?" My response - "Because you're crying." She stopped immediately. Others will just stop and stare at you. Timing is key though. You have to cry when they cry, make the same motions they do and stop when they stop. Works with whining too. Whine right back at them. Now that my oldest is a teen if he start's whining I just ask him if he wants some cheese.

 

[minkydog]

Sorry you're having to listen to the screaming. I well remember the 2-3 year old years. Drama, drama, drama. One of the funniest tantrums I ever saw was my DS23 throwing himself to the kitchen floor in a full on fit. He did a belly-buster on the hard vinyl. Then he stood up , rubbed his stomach, and moved his tantrum over to the carpet. I just stepped over him and kept on moving.

 

[Luv Bunnies]

I work with special ed preschoolers and we deal with lots of tantrums. Ignoring the behavior is the best thing to do. The most important thing is not to give in to whatever the tantrum is about. Under no circumstances should she get the blanket by acting like that. Remember that the behavior will probably increase before it gets better. This might mean more frequent tantrums. She will test you out and see if she can wear you down so you'll give in to her. If you don't do it, she will eventually give it up. It's difficult, but it does pay off. If you catch her doing something really good, like asking for something instead of grabbing, be sure to reward her and tell her why you're doing it. Something like, "Wow! You asked me so nicely if you can have this blanket. Of course you can have it when you ask like that!"

 

[vettechick99]

It's not a special blanket, just one we keep in the living room. She only wanted it because I had it. Greedy!

I continued to DIS and would just peek over the screen at her to see what she was doing. That's when she'd cry a little harder.

Normally when she misbehaves we do the naughty mat, and that works really well. But I don't want to do the naughty mat for tantrums. I like the idea of leaving the room.

It did finally end when daddy drove up. She said, "Daddy's home!" and then (I can't believe it), "mommy blanket please" and I gave it to her.

I have to laugh when she's throws these tantrums. golfgal, you are right, she's too cute!

 

[summerrluvv]

Ahhh my daughter is great at tantrums. I usually ignore her, then she throws herself on the floor and cries harder. Then I walk out of the room. Then she continues on. Then it will finally stop a half hour later. I can't wait until the 2's, 3's and 4's are over LOL

 

[DissyMom]

My sweet angel faced dd just turned 2.....And then it happened..The tantrums started... It's a chore to change her....And her new thing is to not get into her car seat. How great it looks in Target parking lot trying to get her in her seat and her screaming like I'm killing her. I'm waiting for someone to call the police thinking I'm trying to steal her.