To tell or to surprise

[MomofCKJ]

We are suprising our kids. We booked in Feb and our trip is coming up Dec 15-22. It is their first time going and they are 9,7, and 4. They have been asking forever to go and this is their Christmas gift this year.

I decided to suprise for a few reasons. One, I didn't want the little guy asking me every day "How much longer" when we booked so far in advance. Also since it is their first time I thought how cool as a kid to be told you are leaving in the morning for Disney World? We are telling them the night before.

They think we are going in March 2008 with my parents (we are) so we do watch the planning DVD and talk alot about what rides they would like to go on, what they think would be fun. That way we have the fun of the anticipation but they have NO idea we are really going in 46 days! And it will be their first time in a limo, first trip on an airplane, lots of suprises on this trip (Illuminations Cruise, Holiday Sleigh Ride).

I vote for the suprise, esp if it is their first trip. I think the moment of the reveal will be priceless!

Allyson

 

[pigget74]

I'd definitely tell them. I like to get our kids involved in the planning. I like to get the excited about. The anticipation is one of the best parts of a trip. Which would you prefer, months of building excitement or a single moment of extreme joy? I think the answer is different for different people.

I also have a bit of an odd reason for keeping the kids informed. My wife and I both lean more towards being "planners" rather than "spontaneous". We'd like to raise our kids to be the same. Some people seem naturally happier when they plan out their futures, others seem happier when they do things on the spur of the moment. We definitely prefer planning. I'm curious as to whether the "tell them" crowd and "surprise them" supporters differ in what extent the "plan for the future" and to what extent they "seize the day."

Even though we surprised the kids with our trip, we planned for months for the trip. To us we are big planners as well, but had fun surprising them. Once there and after many trip back they realize it takes planning for the trip. Like I said we are total planners, but love the surprises as well.

 

[dianemb]

we've gone both ways and my son says the surprise trip was the best. We are going again in December and so far we've kept it a secret.

 

[rt2dz]

I'd definitely tell them. I like to get our kids involved in the planning. I like to get the excited about. The anticipation is one of the best parts of a trip. Which would you prefer, months of building excitement or a single moment of extreme joy? I think the answer is different for different people.

I also have a bit of an odd reason for keeping the kids informed. My wife and I both lean more towards being "planners" rather than "spontaneous". We'd like to raise our kids to be the same. Some people seem naturally happier when they plan out their futures, others seem happier when they do things on the spur of the moment. We definitely prefer planning. I'm curious as to whether the "tell them" crowd and "surprise them" supporters differ in what extent the "plan for the future" and to what extent they "seize the day."

We plan and we budget and we plan and we budget and then we plan and budget some more, BUT about 10% of things are spur of the moment (provided they fit into the budget). And we have found through experience, for us and our kids, the surprise trip is more fun. You just can not knock a great surprise.

By the first birthday, each of our kids have had at least one year of college paid for. I don't think it is an either/or kind of thing. I DO have to say, while we teach our children responsibility, I don't want them to be unraveled when things don't go as plan and to overlook all spur of the moment things simply because it isn't in the plans. Maybe that is why we do the surprise thing for our kids? You may have a idea there, if not hitting the nail on the head.

 

[DramaGirl]

my parents did that to me and my brother afew years ago (surprised us with a wdw trip) and it was just magical. I would say definitely surprise them

 

[Scot-n-Michelle]

I love all your stories of being able to keep it a secret from your children - my problem is I cannot keep it a secret from my kids. They are DD5 and DS3. They knew that we were going back when we started planning in June. Hopefully when their older I will be able to surprise them with trip, but for now I am so excited I can't hold it in.

 

[2DDprincessesforever]

Our first family trip to WDW was Jan 2006.

We surprised our 2 kids, DD(5) and DD(2 1/2) with a formal note made out of pictures so my DD5 could read the pictures out loud. We made the note from Santa and Mom and Dad (so that they wouldnt tell their friends that Santa gave them a trip to Disney).

Needless to say that it didnt go over as I had expected it to. With the video camera rolling my daughter needed more prompting than I thought with the picture book. When she finally read the sentence out loud " we are going to Disney World". She said in the next breath - "not for real". And dropped the book. I thought I was going to DIE. I was crying with laughter and crying with disappointment.

With tears in my eyes it took over 10 minutes to explain to her that we were going FOR REAL in 3 weeks. Everyone has gotten the biggest kick out of watching that video from Christmas morning.

By Christmas dinner it finally sunk in and she was very excited. My DD2 1/2 really didnt get it until we were there - like I expected, but we still had the best time of our lives. So much so that while we were there for 7 nights we decided at the last minute to stay for 2 extra nights.

Now we are going back this January 2007. Forget telling them. I am just going to wake them up and tell them that we are going somewhere special and let them figure it out. The airplane ride might give it away.

We'll see if they believe me then!!!

 

[DisneyMama27]

We will be going on our 5th trip to DW in January and....this time....we are not telling the kids. However, I never would have been able to keep it a secret the first time we went! There was so much planning and excitement involved! It was the first time flying for my kids AND husband, so we went to the airport a few times just to watch the planes and people. And the amount of time spent together on websites just looking at pictures.....it made it all more magical. And BOY! were they ever on their good behavior!

They are older now, and experienced WDWer's. They know what they want to do and where they want to go. This time though, the fun will be in the looks on their faces when we drive them to the airport instead of school! I can't wait!

Wow, we are kindred spirits! Our 5th family trip will be in January also! And we are surprising them this time too - I also could not have kept quiet before, and the kids do enjoy the anticipation, but we decided this would make a great surprise, since we were just there in OCT! My parents are going with us, so double surprise! I can't wait to drive past the school and tell them we are going to WDW instead!

To all others - surprises are great, but as an earlier poster mentioned, kids' reactions can be disappointing. It sometimes takes a while for things to sink in, so don't let it ruin the fun if they don't react the way you hope! (I read one where the boy was mad because he didn't get to have time to look forward to the trip!)

We decided on the surprise this time, and I don't think there is a right and wrong way to tell them. Have a great time!!

 

[DisneyMama27]

Let me add this - we did not surprise on the last trip because we wanted the kids to earn their own money for Disney. While I agreed with the idea, it was too long (3 months) for kids their age to set long-term goals. They did well, though, and enjoyed choosing their souvenirs. They thought through their choices more, seeing how much things cost, and DD even decided that BBB was "too much" as it would have been more than half her money (and her mommy did her hair and nails just beautifully, thank you very much!). I am glad we did it that way (great math lesson, too, BTW ) and I know we will again, but I am excited about the surprise next trip!

Oh yeah - since we bought DVC, we told the kids, there will definitely be another trip, so start saving your money now!

 

[BrandyC1974]

I wish I could keep our trip a secret. My girls are 6 and 9. I have been planning this trip for about a year (we will be going in two days!!!!!!!! ). I love the idea about the treasure hunt. It seems like alot of fun. I will try to surprise them when we go next time in 2008.

 

[It's A Happy Day]

I have 2 kids, ages 4 and 7. We've planned the ultimate WDW vacation for them. We're doing everything we can to make it as magical as possible. This will be their first trip to WDW, or anywhere for that matter. I don't know if we should tell them in advance about the trip, for if we should surprise them with it. My only problem with telling them before-hand is that I'm wondering if it will wreck my 7yo's concentration at school. I'm torn because it would be exciting to count down with them, but it would also be classic to see their faces when we get on the Magical Express bus. Just looking for some opinions/ideas.

I've been lurking for a while and I just love the DIS!!

I agree with other posters that IF you do tell them, tell them about 1 month before the trip so that it won't be a constant nag of "Are we there yet" As far as wether or not you should tell them would also depend on the children. My 2 kids prior to disney really had not slept in hotels or anywhere else overnight for that matter. We have done trips to the beach and gone places but not really overnight before so we gave them plenty of notice that we were going to be going away with us and we will be sleeping there, they could bring their favorite loveys - pooh bear & bear bear for us - and got into the trip together. We were also driving from MA so we had to prepare them for that as well. We would also go for long walks around the neighborhood and exclaim "training our Disney legs". So should you keep it a secret? I can see both sides of the fence but it ultimately comes down to the kids. Now that our kids have had some overnight "experience" we may surprise them for the next trip.

 

[pdmeroc]

I love the stories. We have done both and both are fun. I prefer the surprise trip, but my son is 10 and will catch on. Maybe he will play along.

We told our kids (7, 4, 2 at the time) we were going to a special restaurant. We drove to another city to fly out inthe morning(way better rates). The restaraunt was closed so we asked the kids if they would like to stay and wait or go home. It's a hotel with a pool so we stayed. In the morning we went to the airport and told them the restaurant was far away and we needed to fly to get there. Once we landed, we had a limo waiting. As my 7 year old walked by it, he said how cool it was an he wanted to ride in it. No problem son, hop on in! We watched Pirates of the Carribean in the limo and had a pop on the ride to POP. When we went under the gate my son whispered to my daughter...I think we are going to Disney. We got to the room after much excitement and asked them if they would like to stay. Well, duh Dad, of course.....for 1 night, nope, 2 nope, 3 nope, 5 nope, a week nope....10 days! The special restaurant turned out to be Chef Mickey's.

This was our second trip with them so it worked out perfect.

 

[PollyannaMom]

I love the anticipation of trips so much, I couldn't imagine not telling!! DS (age 5 at the time) had so much fun with his countdown calendar, the planning video, and even choosing things to pack. Plus a nice side bonus - he was great about it whenever we said no to something else because we were "saving for Disney."

 

[mrsmarilyn]

Just my late response...we were going to surprise but wound up telling them now (we leave in 2 weeks). The reason? My son (i have 5 year old twins) has some sensory disorders and I really think I need to work on what the plane is going to be like, what the parks are going to be like in terms of noise and crowds. He can handle things when he's prepared but does not handle it well at all when surprised. So much as I wanted one of those magical moments, we decided to go with tell now and prepare well. I think the "surprise" moment will come when they actually SEE the Castle for the first time ;-)

 

[3princesses+aprince]

After thinking about this for a long time, we decided to surprise our kids. At first we just didn't say anything because I wanted to be positive we were going, we wanted to go last year but something came up. So after keeping quite for months while I planned I got the courage to keep it going as a secret. We still have til June but the longer I plan our surprise the more exciting I think it will be.
We are actually going to tell them 8 days before we leave, so they have a whole week to be totally excited about going, they will have a little countdown, and help me pack. Not too sure how i'm gonna tell them, but it will be at their bday party the weekend before( it's a surprise bday trip) I can't wait to be in Disney, but I REALLY can't wait to surprise them, and i think we'll have a blast with all of that excitement in the house all week.
What really made the surprise sound good too is my 2 and a half year old does not know time, and she likes to watch the planning dvd, to see the characters and says she wants to go there( I like that she likes to watch that ,so when we say surprise we're going to Disney, she knows what Disney is), she'll say ok come on I want to go there, meaning like tonight. She doesn't understand. So I'm waiting on June 16.

 

[CJsMom]

I love this thread. We are going in Dec - first trip for DS's aged 5 and 7. I love the idea of the countdown and letting them help plan, but I want to surprise them for this trip. I have this great memory of my dad surprising us with a trip to an amusement park. I watched out the window of the car the whole way and when I saw the roller coaster in the distance I got SO excited! This will be a first plane ride for them too, but I think they will be ok with it. We will still watch the planning DVD because I've told them we will go "someday". Thanks to the person that posted the idea to bring the planning DVD so they can watch it on the plane. Although -when to tell them? When I wake them up? Or let them figure it out on the trip there? I just can't decide!

 

[elan]

We've gone several times and last april we surprised ours (8,6,4) with a trip. It was priceless. The looks on their faces when we told them as we were driving down the road. My dd calling her gramma at the airport and telling her we were making her go to dw. Happy memories for us all.
I would say if you are only going once and that is it I'd tell them a few weeks in advance, but tell them know in a fun way. What ever you do they'll be on .

 

[Dawn414]

My munchkins are 3 1/2 (B/G twins), and if it weren't for the fact that we've been hyping it up (this is their first time to Disney), I don't think they'd know/understand about Disney. So, we're sharing any and everything we can with them. Especially me, since I'm the one doing all the planning. We have watched both the Disney planning video and the Disney Cruise planning video multiple times and in terms of going (in 3 months), we're putting it into perspective for them. They know that we leave after Mommy's (my) birthday. We did the same thing when it came to Santa. They knew that Santa was coming 'after Aunt Denise's house'. But for this, they know that they're going on the Mickey ship and seeing Cinderella's castle. My daughter (especially) gets very excited about it. They both know they're going to get to wear their 'costumes' (see pics in my signature). Those are the things that are priceless for me. Perhaps in future trips (we're going a total of 4 times in the next year), we can surprise them because they will have had a taste of it. But not this first time...I am having a blast talking to them and watching them get excited with the videos.

Dawn

 

[jfletcher]

This discussion reminds me of the old question about whether to find out the gender of a baby or not. To the "you want to be surprised" people, I always say: "You are still going to be surprised. You are going to be surprised at the 20th week instead of the 40th week, and now you'll have two big days. The day you find out the gender and the day the baby is born."

Bottom line, you can't go wrong either way.

 

[Fionasmommy]

This discussion reminds me of the old question about whether to find out the gender of a baby or not. To the "you want to be surprised" people, I always say: "You are still going to be surprised. You are going to be surprised at the 20th week instead of the 40th week, and now you'll have two big days. The day you find out the gender and the day the baby is born."

Bottom line, you can't go wrong either way.

I totally agree!