I have 2 kids and am afraid if I get one i will never use it because it will be too much work. Do they still auto focus and would you use that more than manual? I guess that is one of my biggest issues? I like my sx10. However, in sunlight / outside in the shade my daughters face is either washed out / white. Help sway me either way. Is it that hard? Can I do great things w/ the camera I have now?
You've asked quite a few questions, so I'll try to answer as many as I can...
Auto focus:
Yes, all DSLRs have autofocus. I would actually be very surprised if any DSLR does NOT have autofocus.
(although I think there's some issue with certain Nikon DSLR bodies + cheaper / older Nikon lenses, like the 50mm f/1.8 lens doesn't have autofocus on certain Nikon DSLR bodies. The Nikonians on this board should be able to provide more specifics about this.)
I believe a great majority of folks with DSLRs use autofocus a great majority of time. There are very very rare instances where you'd actually use manual focus. You'd use manual focus if you're doing macro photography, where exact focus is critical. You'd use manual focus in very very dark (or near-dark) situations (such as in certain areas of the Haunted Mansion ride), where your camera might have difficulty getting a good focus lock. Otherwise, 99.9% of the time, I use autofocus.
Fill Flash:
In the situation where you're outside but your daughter's in the shade, I would have expected your daughter to have appeared darker than the rest of the photo. In this case, you should use flash so that your daughter appears brighter. This is considered "fill flash".
However, you mentioned that your daughter's image is actually "washed out / white". Can you post a sample picture? This might have happened if most of the scene was in the shade, but your daughter's face was in a brighter / sunny area. If you know what settings your camera used / guessed in "P" mode, you can use the "Manual" mode to override your camera's settings so that your daughter's face is properly exposed. But if you could post a sample picture here, it would certainly help so we can tell what your camera may have done.
Can I do great things w/ the camera I have now?
Yes, as everyone else has mentioned above, you can already do great things with your current camera. Your current camera should be able to take the pictures you want, and your photography skills have plenty of room to grow using your current camera.
With a DSLR, you can certainly continue using the "P" mode, but I'm not sure you'd necessarily get better pictures. On "P" mode, you're depending on your camera to guess the settings, so you'll encounter the same problems with a DSLR as with your current camera.