This time of year is so hard

[Silver saucer]

I really hate this time of year.
It is supposed to be happy yet Im not. I'm trying to be though. I really am. I think of those that passed too soon. I rarely let it get to me, but the holidays can be hard when alone.
I know that there are many others on this board who have fresh hurts and pain, so I feel guilty for feeling so blue.
I used to love the holidays.
Time to suck it up and decorate the balcony with lights.

 

[Grand Koalafornian]

I'm sorry you're experiencing this. From experience, I can say that feeling guilty for feeling bad when your problems aren't bad or recent enough just makes things worse. Your feelings are valid. This is a tough time of year for a lot of people and there's nothing wrong with you for being one of them.

Yesterday was the one year anniversary of my dad's death. I miss him a lot. I'm with you on not feeling great despite the festive time of year.

There's nothing wrong with skipping lights for a year if it's going to hurt you. That said, getting a thing done does help with feelings of sadness and depression. I hope you can feel better soon!

 

[Snowysmom]

It is hard sometimes getting through the holidays. If you don't feel like you want to get into the holidays, then don't. Do what is right for you. Never feel quilty because some people have fresh pain and hurts. It is what it is and you need to take care of you. Do what you feel. As said above, maybe the lights will help.

I am in the situation of having lost my DH this Fall. These holidays are very tough for me this year. I am not decorating, only sent a few cards to special people, and avoid lots of stores. I can't wait until the holidays are done. My kids are decorating so if I want to see that I can go to their houses. I am staying with one son temporarily and his tree and decorations are up. If I can't look at them I just go up to my room or take a walk. I watch the birds, talk to the squirrels, and watch the clouds. It is my go to for when I am very stressed and hurting.

@Grand Koalafornian Sorry for you loss. It is a difficult time of year after losses.

Thoughts and prayers to all who are finding this a difficult holiday season.

 

[mommasita]

@Silver saucer , I’m so sorry you are hurting. I agree with you, this is the hardest time of the year. It’s so painful to think of happy memories. I am leaving for the holidays, as I just can’t face them after losing my daughter. I got rid of everything we had, except the kids first ornaments. I will return around Jan 10. But please don’t feel guilty, we do the best we can every day, each one of us, and sometimes that is just getting out of bed, and if that is all you can do one day, so be it.
@Snowysmom lots of love going out throughout the holidays
@Grand Koalafornian very well stated.

If anyone needs or wants to reach out personally, needs a friend, an ear, please do so.

 

[Snowysmom]

@mommasita I totally understand leaving for the holidays. I have followed your journey. It is a hard one for sure and one that each person must do what is right for them.

Thank you for thinking of me for the holidays. It is very hard this year. Chris loved the holidays. I am glad we had bought most of the grandkids gifts together before he passed. It is bittersweet too. I just cry every day sometimes while I am working. Thankfully I am working from home so it doesn't matter.

Sending to all who are hurting this holiday season.

 

[LuvOrlando]

I'm so sorry for those having a tough time

 

[jerseygal]

Very sorry for those who are having difficulty during the holiday season. If you don’t feel like celebrating, dont, don’t force yourself and place unnecessary anxiety and stress on yourself. There will be holidays in the future that you can enjoy when your situation is better or when you are feeling better. Bless all those with difficulty during the Holiday season.

 

[Karin1984]

Only seeing this now, and hope you got through the holiday.

There are so many people who dislike the holidays for various reasons, mist of the time it is because we are reminded of some kind of loss. Whether that is a family member, a job, or your normal life nowadays, it is all about loss and comparing our lives to previous years or the happy families you see on Facebook, in movies etc. When I am down, I sometimes block people on social media, because their over the top happiness is not helping me at the moment.

I am Dutch and the Dutch phrase for "it is happy New Year", depending on where you put the emphasis in the sentence you can also mean "thank God this year is over". It can't be translate literally, but in English it would be something like "i am happy it's the new year". And in particularly hard years, we use this sentence a lot throughout December. The holidays can be a great joy, or an ordeal you have to get through.

 

[bakerworld]

I love December but cannot stand January and February. We try and vacation during that time. If we don't go away, then I'll leave the Xmas tree up thru to March.