Things that parents do - my pet peeves

[Mouse House Mama]

My pet peeve is when I hear parents "bully "their kids into riding certain rides that they are obviously afraid of. I have overheard this twice where while in line for a ride (ie. PotC - a dad was telling his probably 4 year old kid that if he didn't go on the ride there would be no more trips to disneyworld, and that on the next family trip he would be left home alone )

See now this doesn't phase me. Sometimes a child is more afraid of the line for the ride than the actual ride. One year my DD gave me a hard time about Peter Pan. I made her go on it (I didn't berate her though) and she loved it and always wants to go on it. We also have a funny sense of humor so you might hear something and be horrified but if you heard the whole conversation you would laugh along with us.

 

[Erica09M]

What peeves me is when people are so judgemental about others, especially strangers, when they have no idea what the whole situation is and have never walked a minute in their shoes. A judgement is made after witnessing maybe 1/10th of the entire situation. I wish people wouldn't be so judgemental at "the happiest place on earth."

 

[MSSANDRA]

A different one i have is parents that choose "cute" over comfort.

Now I LOVE to see the little girls in the princess dresses but PLEASE choose one that matches the weather and put shoes on that they can walk in. I have seen children in thoese silly plastic dress up shoes "trying" to walk around MK. We often go in winter when it can be cold but parents will not cover up the cute dress with a coat even when they have one on..

 

[HerdOHuds]

What peeves me is when people are so judgemental about others, especially strangers, when they have no idea what the whole situation is and have never walked a minute in their shoes. A judgement is made after witnessing maybe 1/10th of the entire situation. I wish people wouldn't be so judgemental at "the happiest place on earth."

I agree with you Erica. I saw my children do things in WDW I never thought I would ever see them do. Tantrums and behaviors that were over the top-even considering the huge amount of stimulus. I was shocked and reacted that way and then would glance around while trying to get the behaviors back on track and HATE that someone else would be shaking their head, or looking condescending at our one moment of tantrum that was a small percentage of our thousands of happy moments.

There is no practice or preparation that will prevent 'those' moments from happening when you arrive at a park for the first time. You can show videos, youtube clips, pictures and whatever else and when you get there, your small child will lose it at some point.

It all comes down to everyone doing a little MYOB check.

 

[lilybrooke14]

I was the evil mother who made their kid go on a ride even though she was scared. She did fine on all the other rides we went on. On Haunted Mansion, She did fine all the way through the line. When we were all herded into the room and they blacked out the lights, she kinda freaked out. I held her close, and told her to close her eyes. She stopped crying, and just closed her eyes during the ride so it wasn't scary. I won't make her ride it again if she's scared, but we do try to encourage her to try things even if she's nervous about them. I wouldn't take her on a thrill ride if she didn't want to though. I'm not usually a fan of thrill rides (I make a lot of exceptions at Disney) but I wouldn't force her to do something she was truly afraid of or I didn't think she could handle. She was a little nervous in the Pirates line too, but she loved the ride.

Beyond that, ice cream for dinner is fun. Too much junk in a short period on the same day without any nutrition causes meltdowns, and meltdowns cause yelling, which causes a distinct lack of fun. So while I may deny ice cream for lunch, it's probably because she had ice cream for breakfast, and I want to have fun the rest of the day.

Oh, and I really dislike that people assume that because you don't go back to the room for a nap that you're mistreating your child. We tried that, it didn't work for us. So we either sleep in and go late and spend the rest of the day, or get up early and leave the park early. We don't go early morning to late on the same day.

Disney World is a blast, but it's a family vacation. I will not let the entire trip revolve around my preschooler.

 

[SnowandMittens]

I was the evil mother who made their kid go on a ride even though she was scared. She did fine on all the other rides we went on. On Haunted Mansion, She did fine all the way through the line. When we were all herded into the room and they blacked out the lights, she kinda freaked out. I held her close, and told her to close her eyes. She stopped crying, and just closed her eyes during the ride so it wasn't scary. I won't make her ride it again if she's scared, but we do try to encourage her to try things even if she's nervous about them. I wouldn't take her on a thrill ride if she didn't want to though. I'm not usually a fan of thrill rides (I make a lot of exceptions at Disney) but I wouldn't force her to do something she was truly afraid of or I didn't think she could handle. She was a little nervous in the Pirates line too, but she loved the ride.

Beyond that, ice cream for dinner is fun. Too much junk in a short period on the same day without any nutrition causes meltdowns, and meltdowns cause yelling, which causes a distinct lack of fun. So while I may deny ice cream for lunch, it's probably because she had ice cream for breakfast, and I want to have fun the rest of the day.

Oh, and I really dislike that people assume that because you don't go back to the room for a nap that you're mistreating your child. We tried that, it didn't work for us. So we either sleep in and go late and spend the rest of the day, or get up early and leave the park early. We don't go early morning to late on the same day.

Disney World is a blast, but it's a family vacation. I will not let the entire trip revolve around my preschooler.

When we take my little sister (9) we will be enforcing the rule that she try everything ONCE. She's old enough to "know" it isn't real, and if she doesn't like it, we'll take turns waiting outside of the ride in a gift shop or something.

As far as breaks go, I agree with you! People are giving me a hard time for not putting breaks in, and the travel party is 21 and up, and then the 9 year old! We're not running a marathon, people, we chill after lunch and I'm sure we'll find all of the air conditioned attractions or get some icecream inside. It's not right for our family, and we know what we can and can't handle without getting a crabby group.

 

[Bearybear]

Personally, I don't like when parents yell at kids, even when I, myself, do it occasionally. I also don't like when parents don't enforce rules and disipline on their kids, either.

As for meltdowns, I have never judged a parent (even pre-kids) when their kid has a meltdown. I always feel sorry for the parent, because meltdowns are kind of like tornados. There might not be any warning and they can cause a lot of damage. My DS is 5 now, and meltdowns are slowly becoming a thing of the past, mainly because we know our son better, and also because he knows what to expect and to tell us when he's overwhelmed.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

See now this doesn't phase me. Sometimes a child is more afraid of the line for the ride than the actual ride. One year my DD gave me a hard time about Peter Pan. I made her go on it (I didn't berate her though) and she loved it and always wants to go on it. We also have a funny sense of humor so you might hear something and be horrified but if you heard the whole conversation you would laugh along with us.

And that's how I got my tag. When DD was younger and she's whine about being hungry, we'd tease her and tell her it wasn't her day to eat, maybe tomorrow. Then we'd all laugh. As she got older, it became a running joke and she would play along and give us this sad face, or tell us she was sorry and she understood it wasn't her day. The horrified looks we get are priceless!

 

[brandylouwho]

What peeves me is when people are so judgemental about others, especially strangers, when they have no idea what the whole situation is and have never walked a minute in their shoes. A judgement is made after witnessing maybe 1/10th of the entire situation. I wish people wouldn't be so judgemental at "the happiest place on earth."

Sadly, it may be time to stop reading some of the DIS posts though...as there is a lot of that going on around here.

 

[turkeymama]

In December 2007, we visited BBB with my DD7. She just had to be Jasmine. No big deal. We had already agreed to that. When we were in the sun, it was plenty warm outside. I'm sure most of you know that the Orlando weather in December can be quite comfortable. We spent the day in Epcot, though, and we were in the shade quite a bit. She did get a little cool at times and she complained a little. We offered a jacket or a change of clothing, both of which she refused.

Despite my best efforts, I simply was not able to sit on her and force the jacket on her at the same time. I only have so many hands and she is pretty close to being my size as I am petite. Now I could have threatened to take her home and never return to WDW (or even back to the room) if she didn't put on the jacket, but that probably would have resulted in her crying, which I now know would have made me a bad mom since we can't make our kids cry in WDW.

I'm hoping my sarcasm is pretty evident here and I don't mean for it to be ugly. I'm just trying to make a point at how simple little things can escalate into a no-win situation, especially from an outsider's perspective who hasn't seen the entire situation unfold from the beginning. I understand the OP's point, but like someone else said, it is hard to really understand the situation since we only see a small fraction of what is going on. Even then, we are usually seeing the tail end of whatever has happened, i.e. the crying or the yelling temper tantrum.

 

[livndisney]

I agree with Erica-my pet peeve is people who judge other people while on vacation. You don't know me, you don't know my child. But yet based on a small snapshot you feel qualified to tell me I am doing something wrong

I have had people get very upset with me because they wanted to offer my child a "treat"-they did not know about the allergies. Even when I have tried to explain why my child can not have that "innocent little sucker" they have argued with me. That Mickey bar that is so refreshing on a hot afternoon will make my child very very sick. But I have been insulted for refusing one for my child.

And I use the word "you" in a very general sense, since I KNOW no one on the Disboard would judge another person.

What is that old saying? "Don't judge a book by it's cover"?

 

[mrsbornkuntry]

I agree with Erica-my pet peeve is people who judge other people while on vacation. You don't know me, you don't know my child. But yet based on a small snapshot you feel qualified to tell me I am doing something wrong

I have had people get very upset with me because they wanted to offer my child a "treat"-they did not know about the allergies. Even when I have tried to explain why my child can not have that "innocent little sucker" they have argued with me. That Mickey bar that is so refreshing on a hot afternoon will make my child very very sick. But I have been insulted for refusing one for my child.

And I use the word "you" in a very general sense, since I KNOW no one on the Disboard would judge another person.

What is that old saying? "Don't judge a book by it's cover"?

I agree, too. I've seen these kinds of "bad parent" threads on here before and I could just feel the judgemental eyes staring at me on our last trip. I have a "spirited", high maintenance 5yo and he would usually meltdown whenever we went to lunch, no matter where we went or how we timed it, then afterward he was fine. It wasn't a fit about anything in particular, we weren't even denying him something he wanted, he would just get mad if one of his siblings was too close to him, or looking at him, or talking to each other, or breathing and he has a temper like you have never seen. We will not just standby and let him behave that way, even on vacation, it would negate any progress we've made on teaching him control at home.

If the kid's not being abused, mind your own business. You don't know the situation.

 

[Ashlander]

I agree that we should not judge people without knowing the entire situation. We can't all be the perfect parent all the time. I am always looking for ways to improve my parenting skills. I'd love some ideas on how to help use positive parenting styles when you are feeling overwhelmed. For example: Instead of counting 1...2...3...I have started counting down from 5. My kids know that they have until I get to 1 in order to do what I have asked of them or there will be conscquences. It is amazing how much better counting down works than counting up...lol. Who knew!

I also find that the occassional margarita helps make me a better parent when I am extremely stressed out

 

[mom2faith]

This has to be my biggest parent pet peeve. I have seen alot of parents smoking holding their infants lately. It is so hard not to say something. It is just upsetting. That baby has no choice in the matter. In Louisiana we have a law against smoking in the car with a child under a certain age. I guess they can't make a law against smoking in their presence period though. I guess it has to be a really serious addiction if you can not give it up or not do it in front of your children. I have not had that kind of addiction, so I don't know that part.

I am a smoker. There I said it - LOL!!

Anyway, I was a smoker before DD was born. I quit when I found out I was pregnant and then just before she turned 4, I stupidly started again (about 9 months ago).

SHE HAS NEVER SEEN ME SMOKE!!! EVER!!!

I smoke at work or in the backyard when she is bathing, etc.

She will never see me smoke!!!

Addiction or not, my child is more important to me than when I can get the next drag.

Also, knowing the strength of the addiction I would never want my child to start smoking. That is why I never want her to see me smoke!!

(Let me tell you it was easier to hide it from my parents as a teenager than from a 4 year old )

OK. Of my soapbox now. I just think that parents do not "need" to smoke around their kids, and they have a responisibility to not harm their kids with toxins, or allow their kids to think it is "OK" to smoke.

As for other pet peeves - it bugs me when parents do not discipline their kids and let them run crazy.

Also, line cutting, or other rude behaivior that is initiated by the parent - come on, what are you teaching your child!!

OK. Done now

 

[tifany]

You know what I hate . . . parents that don't parent.

Example:

We at the Contemporary some years ago to watch the MK fireworks and we went out on the 14th floor. Well it was too crowded so we moved to the 13th floor and that is where we found John and his father. John was about 4 or 5 and had his arm and leg out of the security railing. John's dad was about 15 feet around him and said in the most calming voice I have ever heard:

"John, John, Stop that John. You will make Daddy angry and Daddy doesn't want to use his angry voice."

This went on for about 15 minutes with John trying to climb over the railing, under the railing, and through the railing. During that entire time John's dad said the above in a calm voice and also said:

"John, you have made Daddy angry and this is Daddy's angry voice. After the fireworks finish, I'm taking you to our room so Mommy and I can talk to you about making me angry."

I'm sorry, this child was in danger and the dad didn't do anything about it. My husband and I were very close to John along with other guest because we were afraid that he would actually succeed in his attempt to climb over the railing.

I'm a mom and let me tell you, if that was my child, I would have snatched her up, kicking and screaming, and returned to our room. My child's safety comes first over my child's "will" as John's dad put it.

 

[nytimez]

My pet peeve: People who presume they know what's best for everyone else.

Sorry, I had to say it. I disagree with some of the things I see in Disney and elsewhere, but unless I see actual abusive behavior, I don't let it bother me. I'd rather let other people run their lives if they'll let me run mine (as long as no one is hurting anyone else).

 

[MaumeeMom]

What peeves me is when people are so judgemental about others, especially strangers, when they have no idea what the whole situation is and have never walked a minute in their shoes. A judgement is made after witnessing maybe 1/10th of the entire situation. I wish people wouldn't be so judgemental at "the happiest place on earth."

Wonderfully said.

PARTIAL
Oh, and I really dislike that people assume that because you don't go back to the room for a nap that you're mistreating your child. We tried that, it didn't work for us. So we either sleep in and go late and spend the rest of the day, or get up early and leave the park early. We don't go early morning to late on the same day.

Disney World is a blast, but it's a family vacation. I will not let the entire trip revolve around my preschooler.

Exactly! What works for one family might not work for another.

As for ice cream for lunch - no way! Especially on vacation! Sure it would be fun but the sugar high following it and the resulting sugar plunge, which is even worse for my kids, is just not worth it. My kids knew that they could earn an ice cream treat on the way out of the parks if they were good. It worked and we had many lovely treats on the way to the bus back to the hotel.

 

[luvmy3jewels]

I don't mind being judgemental a bit about this, because I experienced it as a child and know how hard it is to listen to....my biggest pet peeve is seeing parents fight at Disney. The last time we went, I saw several different couples yelling and screaming at each other in front of their kids, and everyone else within hearing distance. I thought that was really awful and you could tell by their kids' faces that it was extremely upsetting to hear their parents treat each other that way.

I know how it feels, because I grew up with parents who fought constantly (including on every vacation we ever went on). It's terrible and ruins everybody's vacation. How can you teach your kids to respect other people if both parents can't show any respect for each other?

 

[DVCJones]

My pet peeve is when I hear parents "bully "their kids into riding certain rides that they are obviously afraid of. I have overheard this twice where while in line for a ride (ie. PotC - a dad was telling his probably 4 year old kid that if he didn't go on the ride there would be no more trips to disneyworld, and that on the next family trip he would be left home alone )

I am guilty of doing this. I not talking about forcing my children to ride Dinosaur, but riding Goofy's Barnstormer. My DD was "scared" about riding the Goofy roller coaster. I knew she would like it. So I made her ride it with me. Turns out she LOVED it and wanted to ride it again and again and again, In fact, she still talks about it being her favorite ride. As parents, we know our children and know what to expect from them.

Since I have already lost "the parent of the year award" I will also confess to making my children try food that I know they would like if the just tried it.

It is called being a parent and we all do it differently. I try not to be judge, but sometimes when I see a parent smoking when their kids standing right next to them, I get a little We all know that it is a health risk to anyone, never mind a child.

 

[allison443]

I always mumble under my breath in an ironic tone - "happy families - bring your child on vacation to shout at them"

Literally?