Raven and Conrad: Both clammed up. Mike: "It's just.......I don't truly know what to say. It's just kind of surreal. It happened really quickly and it's been progressing really quickly, and I'll try not to speak for the others, but it's like we don't even.....I don't think we expected this. I wasn't ready for this. I wasn't prepared for this. I'm a soldier, but........every death I've seen, whether it was a comrade that died or me behind the trigger - it was a quick death. I'd blink and they were dead. They didn't suffer. They were just gone, and you never really had time to process it, because you had to focus on the battle or the mission and you still had to move on and stay alive and survive because your comrades needed you to live for another day for as many days as you could get through. You'd grieve later, but in the moment you had to set aside your personal feelings and your fear because there was something more important, something beyond you, something greater. But this? This is watching a person fade away into nothingness, watching them suffer and hurt and it's killing them slowly from the inside out and you can't do anything about it. I know torture. Cancer isn't all that different. I wasn't prepared for this. But I don't think the others were either. But I know war. And I have a duty, and that is always to protect, and to lead, and so that's what I've been just trying to do this whole time, my job, being the leader and looking after the others and making sure stuff happens because that's my role. Because if I don't do my duty and hold everybody together, there's no guarantee that someone else will."
