The return of the mummy episode 5

[jubileegirl]

John and Chloe both slept really well but I was awake every hour on the hour. When this happens at home I get so cross but somehow in Florida I didn’t mind as each time I woke up I reminded myself that today we were driving in our convertible up the A1A to Orlando!

The plan was to start off on the A1A which ran in front of our hotel and head for Fort Lauderdale and then decide whether we should be practical and use the Interstate or the Turnpike, or continue on the scenic route. It all depended how scenic it was!!

Before we left we used our ‘discount’ breakfast vouchers ($7-99 +tax, which isn’t such a bargain when you know there’s a Ponderosa up the road!) but we enjoyed our first ‘all you can eat’ experience! It turned out to be our ONLY ‘all you can eat’ experience actually, but we didn’t know that then! Or perhaps another way of looking at it is that portions in the US are so big that EVERY meal could be described as ‘all you can eat’ (without being sick or bursting out of your clothes!)

And so it was time to say goodbye to the Holiday Inn.
Overall impressions were that it was exactly right for a couple of nights on a touring holiday, and certainly good value if you want to visit SoBe mainly for the nightlife so didn't need too much in the way of daytime facilities. I'd possibly rather have stayed at the Ritz Carlton but pigs might fly, and anyway we wanted to see a bit of Miami so only needed a comfy bed near to the action - which is what we got!!

We plonked our cases in the boot with a bit of stuff on the back seat with Chloe, put the hood down on the car and off we went. After 5 minutes Chloe said ‘it’s a bit windy back here’ and after 10 minutes she said ‘ my hair is hurting my face’ at which point we realised the main drawback of a convertible if there’s more than 2 passengers – it’s no fun for the one in the back!! In the front you have a certain amount of protection but in the back you’re at the mercy of the elements!! It was hot and there was a light breeze, but every time we picked up a bit of speed Chloe had a sneak preview of Twister!! Anyway, I was having a lovely time so we promised to put the hood up ‘soon’ and kept going! To make amends I let Chloe choose a CD to play and she gave me a Motown compilation, so she and I sang along loudly to You Can’t Hurry Love – and I discovered that for my whole life I have been singing
‘But I keep on waiting.
And dissipating,’
Instead of
‘But I keep on waiting,
Anticipating…’
(I often wondered what ‘dissipating’ meant)
This amused Chloe so much that she forgot to grumble about the wind, so being an imbecile has its benefits!
The A1A out of Miami is a bit boring – you can’t see the ocean as there’s a string of hotels, apartments, houses and resorts in the way. I noticed The Thunderbird Resort and some other hotels featured in some travel brochures, but they were a good 10 miles from South Beach, and if you stayed there thinking you were near all the nightlife you’d have a bit of a shock. I hadn’t realised Miami Beach was so long.
We drove through Bal Harbour, Hollywood (no, not THAT Hollywood!) and finally we could see ‘downtown’ skyscrapers in the distance which we guessed was Fort Lauderdale. (I’m typing very quickly now as when I typed ‘downtown’ I had an urge to start singing that Petula Clark song so need to move on fast!)

Now we had a choice to make! We could continue up the A1A, we could hurry to Orlando up the interstate or turnpike OR - we could go to Sawgrass Mills, the enormous outlet mall somewhere near to Fort Lauderdale! In the end we let Chloe decide. HMMMMM! Let me see, windswept car drive looking at rather repetitive scenery or shopping with dad and his credit card. Difficult decision!!

Of course she chose the drive up the A1A with mummy and daddy- NOT!!!! – so we now had to find our way to the mall in a suburb with the charming name of Sunrise. I had visions of roosters crowing on picket fences whilst milkmaids swung their buckets on their way to milk Daisy and Buttercup. (The milkmaid bit sounds vaguely suggestive – sorry!)
However, Sunrise, Fl, is mainly dual carriageways and lots of traffic and NO signs to Sawgrass Mills! As we pondered over our map a man pulled up alongside at a red light and called over ‘where y’all heading?’. If you remember, John has trouble understanding the American accent, so he just sat there whilst Mr. Helpful and I shouted across him and I tried to remember his directions – not easy, I’m one of those people who listen to directions nodding wisely – and still haven’t a clue which way to go afterwards! I did remember that he mentioned Flamingo Boulevard or Avenue so we looked out for that and eventually there it was PHEW!!!
Yes, Sawgrass Mills is absolutely huge! Chloe was on a mission to get some Vans trainers and so we headed for the Vans shop first where they had a buy-one-get-one-half-price offer. This related to pairs, BTW, not individual shoes! So Chloe was well chuffed. When we came to Florida in ’99 Amy got some Vans trainers so Chloe has wanted some of her own ever since, and now she had TWO pairs! We wandered around, bought jeans, a few pressies, allowed a lady to buff our nails with some special stuff (and then tried not to walk past her again as we got away by saying that John had all the money and we might be back!) and then agreed that we’d had enough. It was just too big really. For example, John said he’d like to look in the Levi outlet but it was 100 miles away from where we were – or seemed like it! So we decided to call it a day and have some lunch, then head for Orlando on the turnpike.
We found the Cheesecake Factory and had a delicious main course each BUT ‘we should have shared one’ and nobody had any room for cheesecake! Then I came over all American and said ‘can we have dessert to go please?’ which is what we did!
We loved the cheesecake factory and would thoroughly recommend it, although part of the fun for us was listening to a very ‘drama queen’ type man at the next table describing Alien Encounter to his friend, complete with sound effects of alien breathing and girlie screams!! He was saying how he’s never going near it again and I was dying to lean across to tell him that actually it’s not there any more but Stitch’s thingy is due to open in the fall. Except that would be admitting I’d been eavesdropping which is rude, isn’t it?!
Finding the turnpike was even harder than finding Sunrise, and we ended up on the I95 back to Miami which wasn’t very helpful, but due to good luck we eventually crossed the turnpike and could access it easily , then sat back for the 3 hours to Orlando. The turnpike is much quieter than the Interstate with hardly any trucks or lorries. It cost us about $13 to get to Orlando, but it was an easy drive, although very boring. The only interesting things to see were huge billboards advertising a ticket and hotel outlet at Yeehaw Junction. They were every few miles and each time we saw one John shouted ‘yee-haa!’ until I was convinced if he did it once more I’d throttle him! When we finally passed the exit to Yeehaw Junction I thought I was safe, but no, we then had billboards telling us we’d gone too far and to turn back or to ring for tickets on our cell phone. It was probably the most persistent advertising campaign I’ve ever encountered!
We stopped at a ‘plaza’ for a coffee and to eat our cheesecake which had begun to melt, and eventually reached the eastern end of the 192 at 6pm. Our hotel was at the west end so we drove along recognising places from previous visits until we crossed World drive and soon reached our hotel, the Clarion Maingate. We checked in, were very happy with our room and then decided that we would make a quick trip to the nearest Walmart – which was back at the other end of the 192. So back we went. We needed insect repellent and anti-itch cream as both Chloe and I had some mozzie bites on our legs. Bit embarrassing really as she and I had been taking Vitamin B tablets and garlic capsules because I’d read that you’re then unpalatable to biting insects and they leave you alone. John, who hadn’t taken anything, didn’t have any bites!
We were a bit too tired for the Walmart experience, but we did get a few things and had a little look round. I found a hair conditioner called Henna and Placenta. At first I thought placenta must be the American name for some kind of plant, but when I looked at the sachet it said that it contained ‘animal placenta’. When I had Chloe, the midwife told me that some women like to take the placenta home after childbirth and they bury it in the garden and plant a tree on top for the baby. (Now and then a woman will take it home and cook it. It’s obviously full of good things as it provided a food source for the unborn child.) I can go along with all that entirely, each to his own and all that. But I didn’t think I’d ever want to put a placenta from an unspecified source on my head!! For a start I may not know the origins, but I know exactly where it’s been! Mind you, I wonder if here in the UK we regularly use things with all kinds of unusual ‘contents’ as we’re quite good at officially calling things something ambiguous in the hope that people won’t realise what it actually is!
On our way home Chloe challenged me to sit in the back with the hood down. Boy, was it wild back there! At first it was exhilarating but when the novelty wore off and it began to rain and each drop hurt as it hit me, I realised why Chloe had moaned so much. As for my hair, I nearly asked John to go back to Walmart’s to get me that conditioner!!

Tomorrow – AK!!!!!!!!!

 

[Mickey4Me]

Great reports! I just love reading about your "american adventure". Please keep them coming!

I discovered that for my whole life I have been singing "But I keep on waiting and dissipating"

I had a good friend in high school who thought the line "there's a bad moon on the rise" in Creedence Clearwater Revival's song Bad Moon Rising was "there's a bathroom on the right". Come to think of it, I don't know that we ever told her any different.......

 

[Minniespal]

Great report ~ Thanx for sharing.