The Meanest Mother in the World--A L-B TR, 5/05 *DONE. p.65, with one last pic*

[Libade]

Doug, not so much. He is handicapped. Can’t see 3D. Something about having only peripheral vision in one of his eyes. Because as a kid, he had a touch of amblyopia, and it was never corrected. So his brain came to the rescue. Instead of letting him have double vision because his eyes were not working in sync, his optic nerve somehow cancelled everything in his right eye that was a duplicate. Which meant everything except peripheral, in that eye. Ruined his stereovision. So don’t play softball or Frisbee with him – lack of depth perception makes it not so fun for him. After you bean him in the head with a softball.

OMG - I am handicapped too. Here is my version. I had a lazy eye. Never got patched or fixed or whatever. The muscle atrophied. I do have some vision in that eye, but not much. When I asked my doctor if the laser surgery would work for me, he explained that it's not my EYE, it's my BRAIN that is not working. DH likes to say I have brain damage.

Loved loved loved these last installments! And the description of the racecars was FABULOUS!!!

 

[kpk89]

Cass -- Oh, certainly you will have a chance to break out the Angry Eyes. ((ps, I see that you already have!))

Grammy -- Don't forget the silverware, coffee cups and creamers.

Hucifer -- Sher is scary in a Twilight Zone, how did you DO that? way. She's too loveable to be scary any other way. Just ask her! ((and besides, I AM THE MEANEST!!))

Horsie -- I think you are (not) the meanest auntie. I AM!!! Because I do have a couple of nieces and now a new little nephlet to terrorize.

Karensi -- THank you! Thank you so much! I am hoping against hope that I'll be inspired to get this DONE before I leave next weekend.

Kitty -- I am glad you are still here. I think you've been quite busy at the sewing machine! Yes, that's it. I am green with envy at your skills there.

mrp4352 -- Thanks! What is Kingdom Keepers??

celerystalker -- I'm so glad you could bust out of Mel's drink and pop over here for a bit. I'm glad to have made you laugh! Salad seem to be be a recurring joke in our family, so BEWARE, oh green and crispy one!

Turtle -- yes, I got on a roll for a minute there. And keep the tunes crankin'! And benember -- Space Mountain may be exactly like rocketing around space. Have you ever been? Doesn't mean we have to like it, though.


HMHunters -- Onward we go! Settle down, okay?


Libade -- At last, we've found our first person to sign the petition! To ban all 3D fun!



In the interest of keeping this thing moving and POSSIBLY getting it done before I leave for the World next week, I have another very BRIEF chapter on the way.

 

[kpk89]

When we rejoined Doug and the girls, we were pleased to see that while we were in orbit, the skies had opened up. It was a typical Florida afternoon downpour. We had been fortunate to not have had any yet. So I was in fact glad to see one. Because a dollar-store poncho is a terrible thing to waste.

Kid-size dollar store ponchos would have been great. We didn’t have any. We ended up tearing another head-hole in one of them, and placing it over both Piper and Sydney in the double ride. Conor got to wear his own, but we had to tie the bottom in knots so he wouldn’t trip on it.

As we headed out into the deluge, ready to make a dash for the exit, we quickly realized that ponchos designed for adults don’t offer complete protection to people half that size. Conor’s hood wouldn’t stay up, and the rain poured in his neck hole. The poncho covering the girls in their double ride was bunched and wrinkled in such a way as to channel water directly down their neck holes down their backs, to soak their bottoms. (Why didn’t we think to tuck the plastic in under them as they sat?)

The rain came down in sheets, so quickly that the drains couldn’t keep up. Soon we were slogging through a couple of inches of puddle. Doug and I had a quick discussion, with our eyes, as we ran. “Do we look for shelter and wait it out?’’ “No, we’re already drenched.” “Right, might as well get home to a warm shower and dry clothes.” “Just what I was thinking.”

So continued our splash-dash, laughing and hooting all the way. At Disney, even a drenching rain is fun.

The stinky, wet-dog smell on the bus, not so much.

But momentarily we arrived back “home” at Old Key West. Being wet is no fun, so we put on our bathing suits and went for a swim.

Yep. There’s “good” wet, and “bad” wet. Traipsing about the parks in rainsoaked clothes is “bad” wet. As you can probably guess, playing in the pool and zipping down the water slide and testing the poolside shower and yes, even using the nearby restrooms (a lot) is “good” wet.

We decided that we were sick of eating frozen pizza and Kraft mac & cheese. And we were enjoying the late day sunshine. So we ordered up some greasy, delicious burgers, fries and other treats from Goods to Go, and ate at our table by the pool. And then IGNORED that time-honored rule of waiting to swim until a half hour after a meal.

Tune in next time to find out what perils lie in store for families who swim immediately following a big greasy meal

 

[Libade]

Dare I???? I'm first!

I still like the 3D shows - sorry Doug.

I even liked Captain EO - the horror!!!! Must be my age, because I benember when Michael was cute. Maybe even normal - ish. I had a poster of him in my room. After the first or second nose job. After thriller. Before the pepsi commercial fire thing. For that brief time, he seemed OK. I think the pepsi commercial did him in.

 

[KarenP99]

Yea! I am not a big fan of Space either...a little to jerky & scary for me. But I'll do it, whenever my kiddos are looking for a thrill seeking partner. Good Mom, good stuff!

It's raining & yucky out...so keep crackin!

 

[HMHunters]

HMHunters -- Onward we go! Settle down, okay?

Sorry

Kid-size dollar store ponchos would have been great. We didn’t have any. We ended up tearing another head-hole in one of them, and placing it over both Piper and Sydney in the double ride.

I think you may have a million dollar idea here ... Of course, if you sell them at the dollar store you'll have to sell a lot of them!

 

[Cass]

Cass -- Oh, certainly you will have a chance to break out the Angry Eyes. ((ps, I see that you already have!))

Actually those were my brooding eyes,

THESE are my angry eyes

but you've been pretty good lately, my friend.. .I might have to go visit your sister's TR though.

 

[javamom]

So continued our splash-dash, laughing and hooting all the way. At Disney, even a drenching rain is fun.

On my whirlwind 1-day trip to Epcot in 1991, learned this too. I also learned that they apparently show Illuminations come rain, shine, or thongs of people fleeing the park whilst hurdling huge puddles of rain water. I don't remember much from that really too-quick trip to Epcot, but I do remember running through the warm Florida rain laughing and then being thankful that the car was a rental. We were soaked to the bone.

 

[kpk89]

Perils? None at all. Really. It was all fine. I now believe that that rule was invented by and for Mean Mothers who needed a break from the vigilance of watching their children in the water. It is slightly less taxing to watch them sit on a beach blanket or make a sand castle. I get that, and have certainly used that rule to my advantage on many an occasion. But when you’re at Disney, it’s time to bend the rules.

Things we do at Disney, that we don’t do at home (much):

1. Eat super sugary cereal for breakfast. Sometimes even lunch or dinner!
2. Eat breakfast.
3. Consider French fries a vegetable
4. Swim immediately following consumption of “vegetables”
5. Take pictures of every thing we do all day
6. Keep everybody up way too late every night
7. Drop the kids to the floors of busses
8. Happily stand in the smoking area
9. Hug trash cans
10. Take baths every day
11. Have fun


Okay, some of those we actually DO do at home, still. I’ll leave it to you to figure out which ones.

That evening, I left Doug in charge of the kids. I had a mission.

To get to Guest Relations at Epcot, to procure my “yes, you are a member of the Disney Dining Experience” letter. To get the discounts on our meals. Twenty percent, baby! Even on drinks! For the few table service meals that we had on the schedule.

“Hey!” You might be asking yourself. “They’ve already dined at 1900 Park Fare, and Whispering Canyon Café!” What gives?" Well, in answer to your first question, the discount didn’t apply at 1900 PF because it was Mother’s Day. And to answer the second, I can only say this:

I think I actually went to retrieve the DDE letter on another night. Probably Monday. Because that was the first day the letter would’ve been available. Possibly Tuesday. Why are you always so worried about the details?

“And, HEY!” you might be asking yourself. “Don’t they realize that the card costs $50 bucks and it’ll take more than a couple of ressies to start making that money back?”

Well, yes. When I ordered up the card, I didn’t realize it couldn’t be used at our two biggest ressies: 1900 PF and Hollywood Brown Derby. Dang Fantasmic dinner package! And stop talking to yourself during my trip report!

And, fear not. That card will be melted before we’re done with it. It will be used extensively on our next trip. In January, 2006. I am the queen of spending more money to get my money’s worth. It’s why Disney and I are a perfect match.

So anyway. Off I went, leaving Doug to clean up after dinner and get the kids bathed and put to bed. (Okay, this part is clear, which means it must have not happened on Wednesday. Because Wednesday we ate poolside, benember? Not only that, but now you mention it I’m sure we used the letter to get 20% off our WCC lunch. Whatever.) I went on my mission to retrieve a Very Important Letter. I got to Guest Relations, retrieved said letter, and had a brain cell. Brainstorm. Same thing, for me.

Why on earth would I leave now? I'm here, at Epcot. It’s 7:30 ish, IllumiNations is starting soon. Well, by the time I get back and snag myself a spot.

I went for it.

I’d never been at Disney by myself. I liked it.

No stroller, no stragglers. No discussions or arguments, major or minor, about where to go or what to do next. No answering a zillion questions, or telling anybody to pull up their pants, stop chewing their nails, or take their finger out of their nose. No dropping whatever I’m doing to rush somebody to the bathroom. Again.

I strolled back toward World Showcase, on the Canada side. Off Kilter was playing. I stopped and watched for a bit. I love me some men in kilts. Doug has one, though he hasn’t worn it since our wedding. We had bagpipes and everything, too. That was our compromise. He didn’t want a Catholic wedding, I didn’t want a Scottish wedding. So we compromised and had both. It was really lovely, actually. And, our friends tell us, the best party they’ve ever been to. And, as Doug tells me regularly, the reason that it took us three years of marriage before we could afford to buy a house.

I’m pretty sure if Doug had been with me at that moment, in Canada, our conversation would have gone there. To the down payment that became the best party ever. Sigh.

I walked with purpose after that, heading one of my favorite attractions at Epcot. The American Adventure. I love this one. I am a patriotic sort of person, and though I am not unaware of our nation’s faults, I immensely enjoy seeing this sanitized, audio-animatronicked tale of our history. I always end up with tears in my eyes during the final song:

America, spread your golden wings
Sail on freedom's wind, across the sky.
Great bird, with your golden dreams
flying high, flying high.

At least I think that’s how it goes. For your information, I also cry during the singing of the national anthem, especially at the Olympics, and during ads for “cotton, the fabric of our lives.” And when anyone else cries, pretty much.

I emerged into the deepening dusk, and staked myself a spot at the lagoon railing, somewhere between America and France. During IllumiNations, I remembered seeing it for the first time with my dad and his wife, and my sisters and brother. Back then there were more laser effects, I think, and they used to light up each world showcase pavilion individually during parts of the show. It was literally the most spectacular thing I’d ever seen.

I also remembered the time I saw it with Doug, when we escaped to Florida for spring break one year when I was in college. Not “gone wild” spring break, but a family visit to his aunt and uncle in Fort Myers, and then a 2 day whirlwind trip to Disney. We snagged a table by the railing in Mexico, about two hours early. Enjoyed margaritas and other Mexican delights while we chatted and watched the sun drop out of the sky. Bought a Mexican woven blanket when even our newly purchased sweatshirts weren’t keeping away the chill.

I have fond memories of the “old” IllumiNations. But I loved the new one, too. I savored the moments of peace that came from strolling freely through Epcot, and only needing to worry about my own selfish self for those moments.

But at the same time, as the memories from trips past danced in my mind along with the laser lights and the swelling music, I knew that no matter how wonderful a selfish, solitary memory could be, the best memories are the ones that are shared.

And with that thought, I headed back "home," to be back with the people who make every day memorable.

 

[sheridac]

But at the same time, as the memories from trips past danced in my mind along with the laser lights and the swelling music, I knew that no matter how wonderful a selfish, solitary memory could be, the best memories are the ones that are shared.

And with that thought, I headed back "home," to be back with the people who make every day memorable.

Ain't that the truth sista!!! Loved this one Kimmie!!!!

 

[magicmama]

Kid-size dollar store ponchos would have been great. We didn’t have any. We ended up tearing another head-hole in one of them, and placing it over both Piper and Sydney in the double ride. Conor got to wear his own, but we had to tie the bottom in knots so he wouldn’t trip on it.

This must have been a sight!!
I gave up on the dollar store ponchos and bought the official Mickey poncho. (BTW-They do have child sizes.!)

Yep. There’s “good” wet, and “bad” wet. Traipsing about the parks in rainsoaked clothes is “bad” wet. As you can probably guess, playing in the pool and zipping down the water slide and testing the poolside shower and yes, even using the nearby restrooms (a lot) is “good” wet.

You are so funny!! Your installments are great!! Keep it up!!

And no- I'm NOT an editor but your TR chapters could make a great short story to submit somehwere!! Or one of those very short 'Life in America' type of story.

 

[Cass]

I'm Canadian and cry at the US anthem, what's up with that?

 

[HaleyB]

I'm Canadian and cry at the US anthem, what's up with that?

O'Canada always makes me tear up.

 

[horsegirl]

I have a little idea about that, should any Imagineers be reading. Wouldn’t it be great to have Spaceship Earth and Space Mountain trade living quarters? Put the cooler ride in the much cooler looking building (dirt spots or no). Better yet, keep them together. Let the rockets swoop and careen around the caveman audioanimatronics, and in amongst the visitors riding in their buggy vehicles with the choppy sound system.

You would be a valuable addition to the Disney staff on many levels. I believe that I have heard talk of a coaster going inside Spaceship Earth. And, as you might guess, there is some controversy about that, for all those sentimental saps that like the current ride....which I can understand. TFI

Yep. There’s “good” wet, and “bad” wet. Traipsing about the parks in rainsoaked clothes is “bad” wet. As you can probably guess, playing in the pool and zipping down the water slide and testing the poolside shower and yes, even using the nearby restrooms (a lot) is “good” wet.

Yes there is. I like about 94 for swimming and 104 minimum in the hot tub and bath. Can you believe we were at TL in August and were freezing during a storm? We were. It was cold.... How wimpy are we?

I strolled back toward World Showcase, on the Canada side. Off Kilter was playing. I stopped and watched for a bit. I love me some men in kilts. Doug has one, though he hasn’t worn it since our wedding. We had bagpipes and everything, too. That was our compromise. He didn’t want a Catholic wedding, I didn’t want a Scottish wedding. So we compromised and had both. It was really lovely, actually. And, our friends tell us, the best party they’ve ever been to. And, as Doug tells me regularly, the reason that it took us three years of marriage before we could afford to buy a house.

Thanks for the backstory...I love scottish weddings. I have been to precisely 3 in my life and 2 scottish funerals. The bagpipes? Well, I cry at bagpipes. No matter the occasion. Sob like a baby, no matter how hard I try.... Haley and I will have to skip Canada whilst they are playing O Canada on the bagpipes....

Great stuff here woman. 6 more days, get her done!

 

[kpk89]

Our next morning, Thursday, had been deemed another “sleep late lazy morning.” MGM was in the plans, but we had nothing scheduled until the 3 o’ clock parade. Which at MGM is at 4:30 o’ clock, just so you know.

I woke up early, as usual at Disney. Sydneyralla was also awake, as usual on any given day. We were up and dressed, and had eaten breakfast before anyone else stirred.

I looked around at the rest of the lazy bunch, and made a decision.

I could take the little princess to Magic Kingdom for her magical first haircut, and be back before anybody else was even out of their jammies.

We scooted on over on the bus, leaving the stroller behind and taking just a sling. Sydney may have been 25 months old, but she was still a little snip of a child, weighing maybe 25 pounds at most. I figured that for the sake of speed I could carry her to the barber shop, and then afterward she could walk as we left the park.

The walk in through the turnstiles, just me and my babe, was special. For many of the same reasons I enjoyed my “me” time at Epcot the night before. (or several nights earlier, whenever it was.) With Sydney securely wrapped to my left side, I was free to zig or zag at will, with no worry of leaving anyone behind.

We arrived at the barber shop quickly enough that there was only one party before us in the queue. For those who are interested in this experience, the barber shop does not take appointments; you simply need to show up early, or be willing to wait.

My sweet little Sydney is without a doubt the most reserved of my three children. Upon meeting new people she tends to hide her face in my shoulder. The barbershop cast members noticed this, and immediately poured on the magic. As she was placed in the big chair, Sydney received stickers and some small toys to hold. Salvador, our assigned haircutter, opened some bubbles and blew a few, smiling at Syd. She smiled back, and I knew that this was going to go fine. Bubbles are universal symbols of friendliness and magic, are they not?

Salvador passed the bubbles to Sydney, while he proceeded with the haircut. We wanted just a basic trim, to even off the straggly, baby-ness of Sydney’s super fine hair. Salvador was very patient, and the cut turned out just as we’d hoped.

The strange "pouf" there is from the elastic of the ears, not part of the haircut.

We had to leave the little toys and bubbles behind, but were presented with a Magical Moments certificate, an envelope with some of the hair clippings, and a little pair of “First Haircut” mouse ears, all part of the price of the haircut. Oh, and an armful of stickers. And pixie dust, aka Mickey Head Confetti. See it there, pinched in her chubby little fingers?

Precious.

Mission accomplished.


To this day, that’s the only haircut she’s had. So whenever the subject comes up she tells people about Mr. Salvador and the Buzz Lightyear he gave her. That’s a toy, not a hairstyle, TFI. And she didn’t even get to keep the Buzz!

We did a little window shopping, my girl and I.

And then we wandered back down to the bus stop to zip back to Old Key West to join the rest of our crew.

In retrospect, we probably should’ve headed straight for MGM and met them there. Or something.

Because it seems that around 10 AM, the buses back to the resorts run VERY infrequently.

I mention the NINETY minute wait we had, only because it was VERY out of the ordinary. Not at all similar to our other bus experiences on this trip.

Crankiness ensued.

Sydney was happy, though. She still had her stickers to keep her happy. And she can’t tell time.

Funny, you would’ve thought I’d just figure out a different way back. But I am a hopeful person, and I truly believed that every bus that rounded the bend toward me was THE one. The bus to Old Key West. I believed that the cast members I spoke to in the little dispatch hut across the way were actually going to make sure a bus was en route. So I waited.

For ninety minutes.

Dummy.

We finally made it back, just to scarf down some sandwiches with the last of our grocery delivered bread, and head back out to MGM. For our early bird dinner at Hollywood Brown Derby, 4:30 o’clock’s answer to the 3 o’clock parade, and Fantasmic! Three "never-dones" about to be "dones!"

 

[FutureMrsC]

As a longtime lurker (why I haven't spoken up yet, I'm not so sure!), I just thought I'd let you know that I'm thoroughly enjoying your TR... your munchkins are too cute for words! I love the haircut pictures!

 

[horsegirl]

I only have one word for this installment......

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

 

[kpk89]

As a longtime lurker (why I haven't spoken up yet, I'm not so sure!), I just thought I'd let you know that I'm thoroughly enjoying your TR... your munchkins are too cute for words! I love the haircut pictures!

Thank you so very much! I'm so glad you did finally speak up! It would appear from the photo in your siggie that you are no longer the FUTURE Mrs. C. Congratulations to you!

I only have one word for this installment......

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Is that a word? No matter, I'll take it, as I much agree. She looks so babyish there, though. I can't believe how quickly they change. (sniff)

 

[javamom]

Awwww very sweet

 

[sheridac]

We did a little window shopping, my girl and I.

Good woman!!!! You can NEVER start 'em off too early!!!