The MAGIC is Back!!! ~ WBTA 2014 ~ Come & join the fun!

[TotallyAngelic]

I really miss all the stuff we used to post on the 2011 threads - all the day-to-day, here's what's going on with me, etc. That's how I got to know everyone and feel comfortable. No one cared that it was "off topic" and not related to the cruise. I know we do that on our FB pages, but we don't get the new people in on that. Once I learned Claire and Mary had dogs who were like their children, I knew I'd found some friends. Maybe we could do a bit more of that. Not so much the "here's who we are," as I find that hard to process, but like I said, more "I had this happen today."

Speaking of which, Claire, how are your babies doing? Anything new, healthwise?

Good for you Pat ... I also miss all the day to day chit chat, but maybe it's not as forthcoming at the moment as we are still so far out from the cruise and maybe the chit chat has moved to other media such as Facebook. Whatever, I always loved hearing all about everyone's pets and kids and day to day lives and still do. We also used to post more photos ...so perhaps that could be the start .... info about and photos of your 4-legged friends ??

 

[JustAnnieNotHazel]

Excellent points, Mary.




I really miss all the stuff we used to post on the 2011 threads - all the day-to-day, here's what's going on with me, etc. That's how I got to know everyone and feel comfortable. No one cared that it was "off topic" and not related to the cruise. I know we do that on our FB pages, but we don't get the new people in on that. Once I learned Claire and Mary had dogs who were like their children, I knew I'd found some friends. Maybe we could do a bit more of that. Not so much the "here's who we are," as I find that hard to process, but like I said, more "I had this happen today."

Speaking of which, Claire, how are your babies doing? Anything new, healthwise?

We don't have dogs that are like our kids, we have our cats and had to take Bob for his annual vaccinations at the vet this morning. It's a very traumatic experience for all involved as he is very car sick (but not sick, all comes out the other end!)
One messy experience, claws trimmed, wormed, trip later all is good with Sir Bob again!

 

[TotallyAngelic]

We don't have dogs that are like our kids, we have our cats and had to take Bob for his annual vaccinations at the vet this morning. It's a very traumatic experience for all involved as he is very car sick (but not sick, all comes out the other end!)
One messy experience, claws trimmed, wormed, trip later all is good with Sir Bob again!

Poor Bob ... I imagine it is very stressful for him. Pleased to hear he has now recovered from the experience

 

[SapphireMind]

And for the record, I am not in any Facebook groups for this cruise. I just have posted/read here. But again from the sounds of it, it has been an ongoing issue. Similar to the saying "fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me."

If only one person feels that way about not being welcome, they probably need to reexamine how they are interacting and responding. If there are a few, the existing group might need to reexamine why it is that they are coming off like that, why so many people feel that way.

 

[JustAnnieNotHazel]

Like I said before, perception is everything. I have repeatedly apologized if my words have been perceived differently from my meaning.

But it seems from some of the defensiveness that maybe I haven't been the only one to feel that way, and obviously while it may not be your intention, it could be that it is being perceived that way. I'm sure everything was very democratic when things started (and would continue to be in the future) but it seemed like there had been a bit decided already and you would think coming on so far ahead of time, that would be pretty much be wide open. (Heck that everything would be wide open) do people who come in then feel like it was all decided and done before they even had a chance to join. Again, I am just talking about how it can be perceived.

It does seem like there is a group of friends who have some things they definitely want to do together (which is great) but maybe those activities could be more closed planning between your group/not promoted as open events to then rest, and then other events that are truly open, people could express interest, with the actual "assignment" of people to the activities much closer to the actual sail time. (I was thinking like the brunches and the champagne girls thing-if you have a group that is doing it then opening up to extras, you could list the core group, and then take names of others who want to participate and then divvy it out later so people don't feel shut out.)

Again, while I am sure the intention isn't to be clique-y or exclusionary, maybe that is way to try and help the perception and make it more open.

And if people won't complain that I've "stolen" their work from the front page, I am happy to copy it all, with credit given.

As you have been informed by many people, nothing apart from the champagne girls and the brunch lists are closed. That's not through choice, that is a limit of people that dcl will accept for private bookings.

As also explained many people have waited over a year for this cruise to be announced, so why would we wait another year to start organising activities?

We are not a small group of friends that have shut the activities off to just be private for ourselves.
They are quite clearly on the main page and there are lots and lots of people who have their names down for things. If people want to get together with friends, they do so in private NOT on this board.

 

[JustAnnieNotHazel]

 

[JustAnnieNotHazel]

Poor Bob ... I imagine it is very stressful for him. Pleased to hear he has now recovered from the experience

He is the biggest cat I know yet he is the biggest softie going! He gets stressed out if we have a new child in the house, but travel to the vets is not his favourite pastime!

 

[TotallyAngelic]

Also if I remember correctly there are wait lists for champagne girls and brunches, because we will have a lot of people fall off from the cruise and therefore the lists. I also think I remember it being said, and correct me if I am wrong, that if enough people end up on the wait list for champagne girls then hopefully we can do two sessions.

None of it is final anyhow as DCL may have other ideas and we may not be able to do any of the groups at all.

All of the groups were open to all and not set up by groups of friends. It is just unfortunate that the popular events had maximum numbers and that's why they filled up quickly.

 

[PFlamingo]

We don't have dogs that are like our kids, we have our cats and had to take Bob for his annual vaccinations at the vet this morning. It's a very traumatic experience for all involved as he is very car sick (but not sick, all comes out the other end!)
One messy experience, claws trimmed, wormed, trip later all is good with Sir Bob again!

Aw, poor baby! Our Eskie mix, Luna, gets carsick anytime we take her anywhere. We've gotten to the point where we'll board her and take the others with us on vacation. She's quite happy boarding as she gets spoiled rotten.

At least Sir Bob is good for that business for another year.

 

[JustAnnieNotHazel]

I hope this works, first photo upload attempt....


This is Bob.

[/URL][/IMG]

Wow! It worked.
And this is Poppy....

 

[SapphireMind]

I'm thinking maybe Sapphire that the only person that has an issue with all the people in this group of over 200 people is You! You have only been posting here for just a couple of days and already your attitude is upsetting people.

I think it may be that you need to step away and look at how people may perceive your messages.

This whole group is welcoming and always interested to hear about newbies and offer any help to get them going. There are new people all the time popping in to say hello.

I would hate to think that you throwing accusations around at all of us as a whole would prevent any new cruisers from joining this page.

You asked to be let know if you came off as rude, because you weren't aware of it - FYI, this message did.

People posted about another group saying (apparently) not nice things about the group here, with the insinuation that other people have also felt like that. I don't actually have an issue with anyone. I'm trying, as delicately as possible, to ask you to also consider how you are coming off if there is a whole other group that has an issue. I can't say any more than I have that I don't think the people organizing have done any sort of bad job, and have also repeatedly apologized if my words in any way led people to believe I was saying that.

You also have choices of how to react to what I say - understanding and with the assumption that I don't dislike anyone and want nothing more than to have a good time too, or that I am trying to subvert you and ruin your cruise/forum/post/etc.

Tone is difficult to read, as someone else mentioned, so I will state that I am saying this in the most laid back way possible without any anger, malice or upset. It just isn't helping your case that you are kind and welcoming when you get rude and hostile and can't be civil. It's too big of a group to expect everyone to be besties, but it's not unreasonable to expect civility.

 

[SapphireMind]

Also if I remember correctly there are wait lists for champagne girls and brunches, because we will have a lot of people fall off from the cruise and therefore the lists. I also think I remember it being said, and correct me if I am wrong, that if enough people end up on the wait list for champagne girls then hopefully we can do two sessions.

None of it is final anyhow as DCL may have other ideas and we may not be able to do any of the groups at all.

All of the groups were open to all and not set up by groups of friends. It is just unfortunate that the popular events had maximum numbers and that's why they filled up quickly.

That just why I suggested that it could be considered more welcoming to not have "closed groups" yet, but have everyone on a wait list. I was assuming that there was a core for some of the events, if that's not true, then everyone could be on the wait list theoretically. It then doesn't shut out the people who didn't book as early or make them feel like they can't be part of the "main group" Once again, I know it isn't your intention, but it is a way to perhaps help the perception of the events. To me there's a difference between an event that has been "closed" and I have to be put on the wait list, and events that are planned with lists of people who are interested. It's all about perception.

 

[PFlamingo]

And for the record, I am not in any Facebook groups for this cruise. I just have posted/read here. But again from the sounds of it, it has been an ongoing issue. Similar to the saying "fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me."

If only one person feels that way about not being welcome, they probably need to reexamine how they are interacting and responding. If there are a few, the existing group might need to reexamine why it is that they are coming off like that, why so many people feel that way.

The only people who seem to feel this way are the people who don't like the way things were organized. As I said before, if you join a group that has already been organized, you don't get to re-write the rules and tell them how they need to do things.

We have said you are welcome to put the information on your site, that you are welcome to sign up for open activities and get on the wait list for any that are closed. I don't know what else you would like us to say.

If, after all that, you still feel unwelcome, then perhaps we are not the group for you.

 

[SapphireMind]

The only people who seem to feel this way are the people who don't like the way things were organized. As I said before, if you join a group that has already been organized, you don't get to re-write the rules and tell them how they need to do things.

We have said you are welcome to put the information on your site, that you are welcome to sign up for open activities and get on the wait list for any that are closed. I don't know what else you would like us to say.

If, after all that, you still feel unwelcome, then perhaps we are not the group for you.

A little less hostility would be great!

 

[hazelandannie]

 

[hazelandannie]

Pat I was wondering if you might be able to make a cat coat for our Poppy? She loves to dress up

 

[TotallyAngelic]

If only one person feels that way about not being welcome, they probably need to reexamine how they are interacting and responding. If there are a few, the existing group might need to reexamine why it is that they are coming off like that, why so many people feel that way.

I can only think of a couple of incidents relating to people not feeling welcome since this cruise thread began but unfortunately when a big deal is made of it by those individuals it then escalates and affects other people, who may they perceive that the thread isn't a friendly place to be.

It would never be my intention to make anyone feel unwelcome and excluded, and I am sure I can speak for most of the thread users when I say that, but I also have to say that after reading all of the threads relating to the issues which have emerged since you joined up, none of it appears to be aimed at making you feel excluded or unwelcome, but more just a discussion around the website you proposed.

So please can we draw a line under it now ...

 

[osmonty]

That just why I suggested that it could be considered more welcoming to not have "closed groups" yet, but have everyone on a wait list. I was assuming that there was a core for some of the events, if that's not true, then everyone could be on the wait list theoretically. It then doesn't shut out the people who didn't book as early or make them feel like they can't be part of the "main group" Once again, I know it isn't your intention, but it is a way to perhaps help the perception of the events. To me there's a difference between an event that has been "closed" and I have to be put on the wait list, and events that are planned with lists of people who are interested. It's all about perception.

It is not our fault that you booked later than everyone else. If you were late for a ball game would you go and ask them to start the game again?

Its not all about you.

 

[TotallyAngelic]

I hope this works, first photo upload attempt....


This is Bob.

[/URL][/IMG]

Wow! It worked.
And this is Poppy....

OMG They are just gorgeous .... just what I needed !! I love cats !!

 

[JustAnnieNotHazel]

OMG They are just gorgeous .... just what I needed !! I love cats !!

I was always a dog person, but these two melted my heart! They are so much more entertaining than my dogs at home ever were.